Parenting can get really stressful at times, especially if you have difficult circumstances.  Kids are so very different in regards to their strengths and special needs.  And, some situations are definitely more difficult than others.  Some children really require a specialized set of skills, as well as an environment that helps them function.  For example, parents of kids with ADHD really benefit from having patience and parenting strategies that help their child focus and to minimize impulsive behaviors, as well as helping their child with organization skills.  While other parents of a child with early childhood trauma, need lots of understanding about how trauma works and how best to respond.  Difficult situations lend themselves to parenting disagreement, which can strain a marriage.  On today’s episode, we’re going to discuss the 4 predictors of divorce and how to not only prevent divorce by make your marriage more enjoyable, even when you have a perpetual problem like how to parent.  Unfortunately, some parents become gridlocked on this issue and sometimes lead to divorce.   I’m strongly influenced my level 3 training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy.  This is a type of therapy that is based on research from thousands of couples.  It the very best type of marriage therapy available, in my opinion.  So if you are considering couples therapy for your relationship, consider finding a therapist trained in Gottman Therapy.  Your time will be used more efficiently and your therapeutic treatment will be designed around your custom needs.  It starts with assessment, then the creation of a treatment plan, and interventions to address specific areas that are problematic.  It tends to be a bit more expensive than your traditional therapy approach, because the sessions are usually longer (I provide 90 minute sessions) and more in depth.  It is much cheaper than divorce though, and much less painful for everyone involved.  Here are some important parts of Gottman Method Couples Therapy: 5 Positives to 1 Negative Ratio Keeps a Marriage Healthy When a partner makes a “bid for connection” (attempting to connect with your partner in some way) there are 3 options:  Turn Toward / Turn Away  / Turn Against.  Turning Toward is ultimately what makes marriages flourish throughout the years.  On the other hand, Turning Away and Turning Against may lead to the bids slowing down or quitting altogether.  And, that looks like a marriage that feels like you’re living with a stranger or a roommate.  So accept the bids for connection, even if it’s your parther showing you a pic on their phone or a quick smile.  And, physically turn toward your partner.  This is true for parenting too.  It’s send the message of “I’m interested in you.” and “You are important to me.”  This is a biggie.   Gottman Research provides us with 4 predictors of divorce or an unhappy relationship and their antidotes, aka 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse: Criticism: This is really attacking one’s character, who they are and what they stand for.  It can start out sounding like a complaint, but quickly transform into a hurtful form of communication that can be difficult to heal from.  This can cut deep, especially if it’s done on a repeated basis.  The antidote for criticism is to complain without blaming your partner.  To be clear, complaining can be healthy, but not when it take s the form of criticism. Without complaining we put our self at risks for resentment about things that are unexpressed and bothering us.  It can cause us to get bitter and shift into “negative sentiment override” – when your negatives about your partner overpower the positives.  It may sound like, “You always scream at him during homework time.”  The antidote may sound like “I’m feeling frustrated about homework time.  Can we please discuss ways to help him focus?”   Defensiveness:  This can be a way of a partner defending themselves against an attack that they believe is coming.  In an indirect way, it c