Bogus Business Unlimited: Operation Broomstick

By Yvonne Toner

It’s time for Bogus bonuses. Yes – All that dedication to rotten dealings throughout the rainbow year surely must amount to a little thank you on their Bogus Business Company Day. Though business is not so much happy apple bobbin. Nope. It is more like a little fried and frittered when they look at their profits. You could say more like a flat apple tart. And things are getting even more crusty when Ms McIntosh, the CEO from Maggoty Apples Incorporated, describes their balance sheet as a little overdone. In fact, nearly apple struddled. As if things are not bad enough, it’s not helped by Grimly Croakit, the reawakened and unwelcomed ghost of Apple Catcher Cottage.

Never mind, with Russell Sprout and Rotten Roots & Co colleagues on hand, their next rescue operation is only a dose of whitefly away. After having a good scratch at his cabbage leaves, the trusty green sprout always has a contact or two. Together with his colleagues Cauliflower Sneeze and Moldy Bluespore they plan to go the extra broomstick miles, errr, for a price of course. The next sticky deal is set up, after rediscovering Professor Numpty Noodles in The Old Wooded Wood, an inverted genius who not only knows the meaning of universal jet force but has the magic might to generate it. Who knows where things will lead with Operation Broomstick.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Troubador Publishing Ltd
• Release date: Jan 12, 2024
• ISBN: 9781805147206

Book preview

9781805147206.jpg

Bogus Business Unlimited

Operation Broomstick

Yvonne Toner

Copyright © 2023 Yvonne Toner

The moral right of the author has been asserted.

Apart from any fair dealing for the purposes of research or private study, or criticism or review, as permitted under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, this publication may only be reproduced, stored or transmitted, in any form or by any means, with the prior permission in writing of the publishers, or in the case of reprographic reproduction in accordance with the terms of licences issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside those terms should be sent to the publishers.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Matador

Unit E2 Airfield Business Park,

Harrison Road, Market Harborough,

Leicestershire. LE16 7UL

Tel: [phone]

Email: [e-mail]

Web: https://www.troubador.co.uk/

ISBN 9781805147206

British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data.

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

Matador® is an imprint of Troubador Publishing Ltd

For Josie

Thank you to all ingenious pumpkin professors that reside in the undergrowth of The Old Wooded Wood. Their extraordinary minds that can bend time and space and can create the unknown into a reality. Not forgetting The Old Wooded Wood itself that whispers wisdom and knowledge into the minds of these extraordinary wizards. And for allowing the colours of the Great Rainbow to disembark in their leafy hollows where curious beings of Universes stop by.

Contents

1.The Start of a Beauty Monster’s Day

2.The Boardroom

3.Maggoty Business

4.Brainstorming Session with Norbert the Fortune Telling Octopus

5.Exploring Opportunities on the Rainbow Market

6.Nightcrawlers

7.Toadstools, Fairies & Garden Gnomes

8.Wonderful Wizardry

9.Unwanted Visitors

10.Tinkering with Special Forces

11.The Night Vegetables and Cheese Things

12.Back at Maggoty Grub Apples Incorporated Headquarters Division

13.Green Aliens and Mushroom Memories

14.Crusty Ideas

15.The Remains of Operation Disaster – Bogus Business V Maggoty Grub Apples Incorporated

16.Special Delivery

17.The Verdict

18.The Warrant

1

The Start of a Beauty Monster’s Day

"Zzz-zzzzz-hng… snort. Ggggh-ppbhww-zzzzzzzz. Zzz-zzzz-zzzzz-hngggggh-ppbhww… snort-snort. Zzz-ppbhww-zzzzzzzz… snort."

It was cock-a-doodle-doo of the morning and Verruca was already dressed in her Witchian War business suit ready for the Bogus Business Company Day. And as she was ahead of rainbow time, she had decided to chillax in her beauty experiment room, snotting, snorting and dribbling as she lay in an almost rigid meditative state, her face covered in twangy, ouchy pegs and her ears encased in a pair of fashionable green and black headphones. Each eyeball finished in a slice of cucumber. What a picture. If you could just take a moment to hear what Verruca was listening to. It was very loud, so you didn’t actually need to wear the headphones at all. It was so loud, in fact, that you could hear the blissful teachings outside the experiment room. She had invested in some very intuitive brain training material to calm her mind so that she could feel more at ease with the rainbow world, if that is possible for a witch. The investment was called, ‘Mind Magic for Outrageous Witch Outbursts’.

"Now three deep breaths.

"A big deep breath in, and s l o w l y breathe out.

"And again. Breathe in, and s l o w l y breathe out.

"And again. Breathe in, and s l o w l y breathe out.

"Let go of everything. Including your broomstick.

I said let go of YOUR BROOMSTICK!

Verruca