Back in the Driver's Seat: Billy: A Gay Love Story, #4

By Tmothy Lee

Trouble is looming ahead for Billy Butler. His entire world is about to be turned inside-out because of a simple yet substantial indiscretion on his partner's behalf. Upon returning home early from a visit with his aunt, Billy unexpectedly finds Abraham engaged in a compromising situation. So devistated is Billy that his mind slips several cogs and this distruction of his memories places him in the very centermost level of amnesia. As a result of the erasing of his past, Billy is finding the lack of memories to work in his favor as his wandering eye begins to notice other guys with the sole intent of exercising unanticipated and wholly uncharacteristic erotic designs. Mirna, Billy's sister, is now on the warpath and not even Hell can match her ire.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tmothy Lee
• Release date: Nov 5, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223140177

Book preview

Back In The Driver’s Seat

Billy: A Gay Love Story

––––––––

By

Timothy Lee

Back In The Driver’s Seat

Billy: A Gay Love Story

© 2004

Timothy Lee

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

About the Author

Chapter 1

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Billy Butler stepped out of the shower, dried himself off and then stood studying his reflection in the mirror. Maybe if he shaved his head. He had almost always worn his hair short, cut just above the ears and maybe it was time for a change. Maybe a Mohawk? Abraham Adoni, his partner of 5 years, would not really mind - or at least would not say anything about it if he did. On the other hand, his sister, Mirna Chen, would not like it one little bit but it was not her head so her opinion weighed very little at the moment. Of course, in person it was a whole different ballgame. On his chin he possessed the same goatee that he had worn for the better part of a year, and the mustache having been such a part of his upper lip for so long that to shave it off would undoubtedly require a writ from several governmental officials as well as a voter referendum.

Glancing down to his chest he admired the muscle tone that he had gained working out at the gym. While there was some room for improvement, in his biased opinion, he was definitely boasting muscle tone that had been missing during his younger years. That was a good thing. Lowering his eyes more he had to admit that his stomach was pretty damned fine and flat, and although he could not brag of having six pack abs, he nevertheless could be proud of what he had accomplished in keeping his weight down through both diet and exercise.

Moving his eyes down even farther Billy studied the ‘dangly bits’. They were all right - nothing spectacular. He wanted more, of course, but considering the fact that everything he did have worked the way it was supposed to when being called upon, he really could be thankful for his possessions.

After the series of incidents that were perpetrated by Billy’s high school bully, Lazarus Smith, and his cohorts, Billy and his partner’s homes (he emphasized the plural) had been burgled, burned and generally made unlivable. As a result, Abraham had pretty much cut himself off from practically everybody, including Billy. Since that time Abraham had been running hot and cold, as his depression dictated, although it had to be emphasized that he had made amazing progress over the past year with his up’s being much brighter, though no less frequent then the down’s. The entire relationship tended to bounce like a yoyo with Billy being the recipient of emotional duress during the bad times, and yet he was determined to stay with his man and rough out the bad times. It was difficult but he figured Abraham would eventually level out, hopefully for the better, and their bond would flourish.

His eyes lowered to his legs which were muscular and well-defined, the dark hair that covered the skin being about as thick there as it was upon his chest and arms. He thought his feet looked big, but at six-foot tall the size 11 shoe that he wore was, like his sexual equipment; average. The man gave himself one more once-over before grabbing the stick deodorant and applying it under each arm. He needed to look and smell his best for the long trip ahead - the trip in which he, at first, wanted no part. How his sister had talked him into it was anybody’s guess, although Mirna could be quite persuasive when she wanted. Actually, the more Billy thought about it he seemed to recall her exact words being, You’re going, which pretty much left no room for error, confusion or contemplation.

It had been somewhere around 15 years since Billy and Mirna had last seen their Aunt, Rose, whom he vaguely remembered being somewhere around five years younger than their mother. The last occasion, as Billy recalled, had been a fifth birthday bash for her son, Herbie, who Billy probably would not recognize on the street after all this time. Then again, he mused while slipping into his blue jeans and buttoning the fly, Herbie was pretty wimpy then so all he would have to do would be to look for a twenty-one- or twenty-two-year-old nerd and that would be his cousin. Billy did not remember much about Herbie’s sister, Jeri, who was about Billy’s own age of twenty-four. Odd that he would block out her memory - or maybe it was because either she was so ordinary that she blended in with her surroundings, or, more than likely, Billy had been paying more attention to Herbie because of his later-discovered proclivity toward the male sex. Then again, Billy would have been all of seven years old at the time so he would have been too young to notice things like that... maybe.

Pulling a shirt off the hanger from within the closet Billy eyed the empty bed and wished that Abraham had awakened him so that they could have at least said a ‘goodbye’ and share one last kiss before the two-week separation. As it happened, though, Abraham was suffering from a considerably lengthy period of melancholy and more often than not ignore Billy and avoid speaking to him at all. Yes it was emotionally draining and yet Billy continued to hold onto the good weeks in order to continue the carrying of a torch for the poor, confused and suffering man. After all, Abraham’s disease was just that and had to be dealt with kid gloves until a palpable antidepressant could be found to curb the bad.

Hearing a honk out front, Billy grabbed his wristwatch off the nightstand on his side of the bed and glanced at the time. Mira was early, as usual, and no doubt impatiently waiting in the driveway, drumming her fingers and cussing him out for not having already been out on the sidewalk with his luggage. She would just have to bide her time, he thought with a certain amount of satisfaction. Pulling open a dresser drawer, Billy withdrew a pair of socks right as his eyes fell upon a snapshot of himself and Abraham taken several years ago. He withdrew the colorful picture of them standing in front of the lively neon lights of a Ferris wheel one evening during the county fair.

That was at the beginning of their relationship when everything was exciting and new; when they could not learn enough about one another or keep from being in contact in one fashion or another. Their touch had been magical, their eyes sparkling and their love never-ending. Practically every available minute of every day was spent together and they both swore that their admiration for each other would last forever. Billy continued to stare at the picture while wondering why Abraham’s fall from grace had managed to change everything so abruptly. In all honesty, he already knew the answer to that question - life happened. Events happened. Circumstances changed. And although Abraham had made great strides in coping with his depression, there was still a palpable space between them which widened more with every sporadic chapter in their collective book.

There was no doubt in his mind whatsoever that Billy still carried a torch for Abraham - a very strong torch and that could not be denied. To Billy, the sun continued to rise and fall around his partner despite the dark forces that had been at work seriously attempting to diminish that feeling. These forces had obviously taken their toll on Abraham, but it was Billy’s continued belief that as long as at least one of them still carried that torch they would weather the storm of indifference and complacency and emerge triumphant on the other side. He had faith in himself, their dedication to one another, and the power of that which had pulled them together in the first place.

He lay the photograph back down in the drawer and reclined on the edge of the bed to slip on his socks. Once that task had been completed, Billy fished the phone out of his pocket and studied it for a few moments. The fact that he had not been able to say an official 'see ya' later' to his lover bothered him something awful, even more so after the flood of memories that had been dredged up by the picture now hidden away in the desk drawer.

A couple taps of the touch screen and he pulled the phone to his ear to await Abraham's answer. Strangely, he began to feel somewhat uneasy, almost as if the two of them had never spoken before and he was fearing a loss of words. This worry, it turned out, was all for nothing as the phone went directly to voicemail, proving that either Abraham was on the phone or he had it turned off... perhaps in anticipation if Billy's call. This thought actually irritated Billy as he pressed the icon to end the call and slipped the device back into his pocket.

After some consideration, though, he decided it was entirely possible that his lover was deliberately blocking any form of communication that was available... both in person and away. In the interest of self-preservation, Billy pushed the notion aside in the hopes that his evaluation was wrong. More than likely, Abraham was merely busy at the architect firm and had silenced the phone in order that he be better able to concentrate on whatever project in which he was currently involved. That was all. There were no hidden agendas on Abraham's part, only those perceived in Billy's conspiratorial and troubled mind. A little time apart and the two would be a cohesive unit again and riding the rails to success, love and lust once more with fireworks being displayed in the background.

The sound of the front door downstairs brought Billy's thoughts back to the present. The enemy was now inside the house, and by the volume of the slamming door he knew that his sister was not a happy camper. At that moment he heard her call out his name, and although she did not sound to be as irritated as the crashing door would have indicated, Billy nevertheless knew that he had better waste no time in answering her. Being no stranger to her short fuse he had learned at a very early age not to mess with the woman, especially if he were the one at fault. Then again, this time it was she who was early so Billy decided to play possum and then hit her with her own failing when she eventually discovered him. Therefore, he sat in absolute silence with an evil smile spreading across his face.

Her shadow preceded her on the floor right before Mirna rounded the corner and stepped into the bright bedroom. She looked quite cool and comfortable in her tan blouse and shorts, and her leather sandals made Billy wish that he had purchased a pair when he had seen them in the store last week.

Oh, there you are, she said, her voice lacking the expected venom. Didn't you hear me calling you?

Yeah, I heard you, he said smugly, bracing himself for her retort.

Mirna strolled over to the end of the bed and smiled. All right, what's wrong?

You're early, that's what's wrong, Billy told her with a frown. You can't expect me to anticipate your every move and... he began, launching his preemptive strike before she had an opportunity to lay the foundation of her tirade.

Surprisingly, Mirna shook her head, her smile turning to one of concern. I know I'm early, sorry. I mean that you look worried. Anything wrong? You feeling okay?

Having not anticipated this unanticipated attitude, or the lack thereof, Billy was momentarily taken aback and sat in confused silence for a moment. What? he finally asked, lacking a better response.

You and Abraham have another argument? Mirna asked with a great deal of sympathy painting her words.

No, of course not, Billy said, now somewhat irritated at the assumption. In the first place, to his knowledge he had not been displaying any signs of there being any problems, and even if there had been it was rather presumptuous of her to think that another rift had formed between himself and his lover. As far as his siter knew, Billy may have stubbed his toe in the shower, or cut himself shaving, or his uvula had inexplicably sprouted an ingrown hair, and that would be the cause of her confusion.

"And what do you mean 'another argument'? he asked before contemplating things quietly for a couple moments. Lowering his eyes to the floor he added, I’m just a little disappointed that I didn’t get to say goodbye to him, that’s all.

She sat down on the side of the bed and patted his knee gently. Things still pretty dicey around here?

Billy took a deep breath, exhaling before speaking. Everything'll be fine, Mir. We just need a little time apart, that's all.

Yeah, I think you're right, Billy. After all that's happened to you two, I think a little time away from one another will do you both a world of good. Again she patted his knee. Well, don't worry about it. The two weeks will go really fast and before you know it you'll be crawling on top of him again and fucking his brains out.

To this Billy felt a frown erupt upon his face. Crude, as always, he grumbled, but I sure hope you're right, he said softly.

"I'm always right. Come on, let's hit the road before traffic gets too bad. And don't worry, Billy, everything will turn out fine. You two have hit a rough spot in the road, again, but it'll all work out. I know he loves you and you love him, so let's concentrate on having a good time away from home. Let the healing begin."

Yeah, okay, he said, taking solace in her words of encouragement.

Is that what you really plan on wearing? It's going to be hotter than hell over there, she said, standing. Where's your suitcase? Haven't you even packed?

The suitcase is downstairs beside the front door. Surprised you didn't trip over it when you came in.

Well then, get your skinny ass in gear and let's get on our way. Where's your shoes? she asked with a quick glance down to his feet.

I'm getting there, he complained warily. I'm sure it takes you awhile to get ready, too.

I'm faster than a speeding bullet - while some people I know and love are slower than a damned turtle. Billy, moss is growing under your ass. Let's get a move on.

Would you just take a chill pill, he warned her, standing and glancing about for his shoes which, oddly enough, were not where he remembered having left them the previous night.

I can't wait to see Herbie and Jeri again, Mirna said with a slight chuckle. I wonder if she's still the character that she was back then?

I don't remember much about her, Billy admitted as he approached the closet and pulled the door open with a look down. "I remember him being a real nerd, though. Where the hell did I put my shoes?" Closing the door after having no luck there, Billy continued his search on the opposite side of the bed.

Did you think of looking where you left them last night? she asked, now with her arms folded over her chest and a smirk upon her face.

Billy cast his sister a quick glare. Gee, no, I never thought of that, he told her sarcastically.

Wear a pair of Abraham's shoes and let's get moving.

In the first place, only his boots are there and I'm sure as hell not wearing boots in that weather, and in the second place his feet are bigger than mine.

So go barefoot, she said impatiently with a glance to her watch.

Dropping to his knees he lifted the edge of the blanket and checked beneath the bed, with no success. This is ridiculous, he moaned as he stood.

Maybe you sold them in your sleep, Mirna offered with not the slightest amount of sarcasm. Have you thought of chaining yourself to the bed at night, or have you and Abraham already tried that kinky stuff?

I hate to disappoint you but he and I never did any of that, unlike... he began before stopping to contemplate his sister a moment. No, he finally admitted with a sudden feeling of nausea, I don't want to know about you and Wei's sexual proclivities. He next poked his head into the bathroom, again coming up empty-handed. Okay, this is getting ridiculous. I was wearing them yesterday and I know I put them by the chair there, he said with a quick point to the wooden chair placed beside the dresser over which he had hung his pants.

Maybe they walked away on their own? Mirna said with a slight chuckle. That being the case they're probably farther ahead to Aunt Rose's house than we are. Put on Abraham's boots and let's get going. We'll stop and buy you another pair of shoes when we get there.

They didn't just up and walk away, Mirna, Billy said with growing anger.

I'm going to go down and load your suitcase into the car, and I'm giving you exactly sixty seconds to get down there before I leave without you.

Fine, go without me, he said. I didn't want to go, anyway.

Sure you did. Now hurry up. Go in your socks if you need to, she said while approaching the bedroom door.

And get my socks dirty? Hardly.

Then I'll carry you out to the car, she said with a glance back. You have one minute.

Go away, Billy said, knowing damned well that his sister actually would carry him out to the car if need be. He watched her depart before again pulling open the closet door and dropping to his knees in order to get a better view of the floor beneath the clothing hanging above. A single pair of tan work boots occupied the space and Billy was actually contemplating pulling them out when he all at once remembered having removed his own shoes in the living room last night.

Jumping to his feet he headed down the stairs, his soft footsteps accompanying his trek down the brown carpeted steps and into the front room where, as anticipated, his sneakers awaited in silent submission at the foot of the couch. Plopping down, he slid one shoe on and was about to tie it when his eyes fell upon another picture. This one was framed and featured Abraham in a professional shot they had taken at a studio last Christmas. The man looked handsome, as always, and the smile was endearing, though not genuine. That had been taken right after Billy's incident with one of Smith's cohorts in which Billy ended up staring down the barrel of a gun in the middle of the street. Not one of his better moments, he admitted silently.

To the left of Abraham's picture was an almost identical shot of Billy and he could see the discontent in his own eyes. Their problems were certainly evident in both faces and Billy really had not noticed the evidence in the pictures until now. The honking of the horn from outside brought his attention back to the task at hand and he finished tying the one shoe and slipped on the other, just then noticing a tear rolling down his left cheek. Not having been aware of wanting to cry, he quickly wiped it away while realizing a mounting melancholy creeping into his soul. He missed his man before even having departed.

Finishing with the last shoe, Billy stood, grabbed the keys off the table beside the couch and was heading for the door when the phone inside his pocket began to ring. It had to be Abraham! Fishing it out he quickly tapped the screen without first having noted the Caller ID. Abe? he asked in hopeful expectation.

Billy, it's been two minutes, Mirna said in an angry voice. I'm not getting any younger here. Get the lead out. Did you find your shoes?

Terribly disappointed over the call not having originated from his partner's phone, Billy nevertheless did not want his disappointment to show and forced a smile to his lips. I'm on my way outside now. Just hold onto your pantyhose.

Tapping the screen again, he was about to shove the phone back into his pocket when he thought it a prudent idea to give Abraham another try. Billy needed to hear Abraham's voice one more time before he stepped outside their house. He seemed to be experiencing a sense of finality at the moment, one that hinted of there being no turning back from the abyss if he were not to connect with his partner while still inside their mutual domain. It was a silly notion, he knew, and yet the feeling could not be ignored.

As before, Billy was treated to voicemail, only this time he ended the call without leaving a message. It seemed too impersonal at the moment. Maybe at some point along the trip he would try again and hopefully they would connect; at which time he could tell Abraham of his continuing love. Reassure his man that, in spite of their past difficulties, things had not changed on his end. He gave Abraham's picture one final glance before exiting the house, and feeling the weight of his sorrows weighing down upon his shoulders he headed for the car under his sister's impatient eye.

What'd you do, fall in the toilet or something? she asked once he was seated beside her.

No, I was just playing in it, he returned.

That would explain the brown on your hands, or did that come from Abraham's skin?

I'm really not in the mood for your racial humor at the moment, he said impatiently while tugging the seatbelt down across him and snapping it into place.

Well, somebody got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.

Mirna, my whole relationship is going down the tubes and you somehow feel the need to... he began to complain before being interrupted.

Your relationship is not going down the tubes, Billy, so don't even think that way. You two have been doing so much better and progress like that can only be invigorating, but leave it to you to think the worst. And secondly, if you're going to be in a mood you'll have to ride in the trunk. Only happy people are allowed to ride shotgun. Where'd you find your shoes?

Downstairs in front of the couch, he admitted.

Starting the car, Mirna cautiously backed out of the driveway and began the five-hour drive that was to take Billy farther and farther away from his problems. Unfortunately, it was also taking him farther and farther away from the solution, that being the man he loved unquestionably and for whom he was feeling an impending sense of loss.

Mirna had been right all along, and although Billy admitted this to himself he would never admit it to his sister. She was cocky enough so why feed it? Getting away actually did make him feel better about himself and his and Abraham's situation. Not being continuously surrounded by the ghosts of their shaky relationship actually served to awaken Billy's optimism, and that, in turn, acted to strengthen his sense of security. He had tried twice over the course of the five-hour drive Billy attempted to reach Abraham by phone but each call resulted in the damned voicemail which proved to Billy that his lover was extremely busy at work and could not be disturbed. He dared not think about the alternative again for fear his mood would sour. This was nothing new for Abraham, therefore Billy did not feel as if he were being avoided, as he had earlier. This, again, being the positive result of his removing himself from the bad vibes in their house so that he could look at everything from another angle, a clearer perspective.

Mirna's continual assurances along the way of the unstable relationship following a clearly defined and natural course also served to help Billy see things through a different set of eyes. Therefore, by the time they finally pulled into the driveway of their aunt's rambling old house Billy was feeling pretty damned good again. Maybe his life would not melt down into a putrid pile of oozing goo after all and, once back home again, the two men would be able to pick up the broken pieces of their shattered lives and rebuild what they once had. At this moment, it looked pretty good.

Glancing through the windshield as Mirna brought the car to a halt and killed the engine of her practically new compact car - a gift from her husband, Wei - Billy stared out at the house and marveled at its size. He remembered the place as being a lot smaller. Then again, he had been a lot smaller the last time he had been there so things were bound to be remembered differently.

At two stories, the place looked to be concealing at least fifty bedrooms and most certainly qualified as being a mansion in his view. The two bay windows standing on either side of the double doors with inset oval etched glass revealed the living and dining rooms that he knew to be inside. A small wooden porch with angled overhang defined the front of the house, leaving just enough room for a rocking chair on the right and the myriad hanging Bougainvillea, spider and English ivy plants that managed to dominate the entire left-hand side of the deck.

On the upper portion of the home, no less than seven dormers overlooked the front yard which indicated their being as many bedrooms on only a single side of the house, and while he remembered there being adequate sleeping space during their last visit he did not remember there being that much sleeping space. White trim accentuated the corners and angles of the dark green home giving it an almost woodsy look amidst the other homes in the neatly trimmed neighborhood.

Warily, Billy extracted himself from the car and stood, stretching his sore and stiff muscles in order that they begin to move again on their own. Mirna also stepped out from behind the wheel and together the two gazed upon the massive house in amazement.

I don't remember the place being this big, Billy confessed over the car roof.

Yeah, it's a biggie, Mirna commented, stretching her arms over her head.

Noting no car in the driveway, Billy wondered aloud if anybody was home, then questioning his sister whether or not she had inadvertently mixed up the day of their arrival. While she assured him that they had gotten there on the prescribed day, the lack of movement inside the house and the definite absence of their aunt's car seemed to indicate otherwise.

I'm getting hungry, Billy complained, playing up the fact that his sister had insisted they not stop in the last two hours for something to eat. She claimed that Aunt Rose had a big meal planned for their arrival and that they did not need to spoil their appetites. Therefore, Billy was hungry and ready to eat a horse. With there being no such feast on the hoof in his immediate sights, however, he would have to settle on the planned meal, whatever that was, and be content to hope that it would be served in the next ten minutes or less. With there being no signs of life around or within the house, thought, it appeared as if he was going to have to wait longer than anticipated.

Hearing the door open on the opposite side of the car, Billy turned to find his sister was beginning to extract their luggage from the back seat and this prompted him to join her in the effort. She generously offered to take the lighter of the two bags - Billy's - leaving him to lug hers across the cobblestone walkway that cut a curved path through the newly-mown grass. It was becoming increasingly obviously that she had packed an anvil, for the farther he carried the bag the heavier it was becoming. As a result, halfway to the house he made a very snide remark about her maybe having packed Wei inside as well as her clothing. She was quick to point out that, no, her husband was not inside the case. He was, she added with a quick glance to her watch, safely tucked away in the Asian restaurant he owned and managed, working his 'magnificent ass' off.

On this point there was no argument. Billy had always admired Wei's perfectly shaped tight ass and had quite often expressed his desire to violate said property, only to be shot down time and time again by both Mirna and the owner of the ass, himself. Naturally, Billy had only been joking - mostly - and admittedly would have been quite alarmed were his request to have been accepted.

The two approached the front door, just then finding it swing wide open and their aunt whoosh out onto the porch with an enormous smile upon her lips and her arms outstretched. Her attire