Winning Through Mental Toughness: The key to success in sports and in life!

By David Carr

What do all "clutch" performers have in common? What is their secret? Why is working hard and eating right not enough? Everyone's doing that, right? You need an "edge!" The great ones have "it" and you need to discover and develop "it". MENTAL TOUGHNESS is the difference; it is the edge you must obtain! There is no way to achieve and maintain peak performance without it. Sports Psychology is the last frontier of athletic performance enhancement and MENTAL TOUGHNESS is its crown jewel!

Mental Toughness is what this book is all about: how to get it, how to keep it, how take what you've already got to a much higher level. The principles and concepts in this book are proven and guaranteed to produce results not only in your game, but also in every aspect of your life. As a matter of fact, this book literally has the power to change your life forever. Prepare to be challenged and empowered to become the person you were born to be-a champion!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Proisle Publishing Services
• Release date: Jun 27, 2023
• ISBN: 9781961526501

David Carr

David Carr was a reporter and the “Media Equation” columnist for The New York Times. Previously, he wrote for the Atlantic Monthly and New York magazine and was editor of the Twin Cities Reader in Minneapolis. The author of the acclaimed memoir, The Night of the Gun, he passed away in February 2015.

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***Copyright Information***

Winning Through Mental Toughness—The Key to Success in Sports and in Life. Copyright 2010 by David L. Carr. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used, reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic or mechanical including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage or retrieval system without written permission in writing from the author, except in the case of quotations obtained for use in the book and brief quotations embodied in the text itself.

David Carr’s books may be purchased for promotional use in camps, educational seminars, team training, etc. There are discounts available for volume purchases and a portion of all sales goes to charity or a worthwhile cause of some kind. For information, please go to: www.davidcarr.win. To request permission to reproduce any portion of this book, or to request information on personal training and possible speaking engagements, contact David Carr at [e-mail].

***Dedication***

I dedicate this book to my four sons: Chris, Colby, Caleb and Cass. They represent four of God’s greatest blessings in my life. Like it or not, they have endured the concepts and principles of this book their entire lives. Chris—the bumblebee, going through life defying the odds, doing what everyone says can’t be done. Colby—the true warrior who knows no fear and leads without hesitation, taking others to higher levels. Caleb—the natural, who effortlessly moves with calmness, grace and in spite of success after success possesses a humility about himself that amazes even those closest to him. Cass—the passionate, confident one with the daunting task of being the last of four boys, and the added pressure of following Caleb, yet who continuously astounds me with his achievements. You all have blown me away with your accomplishments. You are all fierce competitors. You are all tremendous examples of mental toughness and winners in life. Each of you have made your own mark and carved out your own place in my heart. You will never fully realize how much of an inspiration you have been to me over the years. Thank you, and I pray God blesses each of you with children just as special as you are.

***Special Acknowledgements***

I would like to thank my wife, Kelly, for her tremendous patience and willingness to let go, and graciously allow me all the time and resources it took to pursue this vision and make this project a reality. At times this book took on a life of its own and became an obsession for me. In the final stretch, I became so intent on finishing what I had started, there were many times my career and other responsibilities took a back seat. Very few wives would have been as understanding. I love you for being you, and for allowing me to be me.

I would also like to thank my parents, Roger and Carol Carr, for their encouragement and tremendous belief in me over the years, especially during the times of loss and drought. Much of the content of this book was learned under their leadership and from their example. I love you, Dad, for being a Dad—I love you, Mom, for being a Mom. My parents know what that’s all about, and my readers will discover what that really means to me as they reach the latter chapters of this book.

Mom, Kelly—it’s done! Aren’t you glad you don’t have to run and hide from me anymore? I can only imagine how weary you must have been from all the times I’d seek you out to ask your opinion on the structure of my never-ending sentences, the correct spelling of a word or the correct use of some butchered saying or phrase I would have pulled out from somewhere in the recesses of my mind. I couldn’t have done it without you. And if there’s anything grammatically wrong with these special acknowledgements—I’m sorry. You didn’t get to proof this. I didn’t want to let the dog out of the box. Just pulling your leg—I know it’s really cat out of the sack. OK—it’s cat out of the bag. I’m really not as bad as you think. Whether it’s all exactly right or not wasn’t that important. I just wanted this to be special. With or without any errors, hopefully I succeeded. Thanks!

WTMT hit on all the right ideas that encompassed my 42 years as a high school teacher and coach. This book challenges the reader with the key elements required to reach their potential and it stirs up the desire to be a part of something special, not just in athletics, but also in life. God has blessed me with the opportunity to share in the lives of a large number of high school athletes. I would have required each of them to read this book! Going forward I will be using it in our camps and workshops as we develop future young players. Ken Loyd—a High School Basketball Coach in Texas for 42 years, producing three State Championship Teams: Huntington High School (74) Avinger High School (77& 96).

Finally, a down-home, practical book for up and coming athletes from a successful hometown man. WTMT is full of proven methods and techniques, with a foundation of deep spiritual values behind it. Rob Irwin, PhD—Sports Psychologist, Founder/CEO—Sport of Mind Institute located in Vista, California

As I reflect back over my success and failures as an athlete---both in high school and at the Big XII level--my failures were the result of losing the race in my head before I even stepped onto the track. Winning, both in life and in the game, will only come about when you have learned to not fear failure, to overpower negative thoughts, and to know that you will never give less than 100%. Erin Wait—a multi-sport All-State athlete at White Oak High School and competitor in Track at the Division I level in the Big XII Conference while attending Baylor University.

I totally believe everything in life comes down to how you think. Our thoughts have a tremendous impact on all areas of our lives. My studies in psychology at Dallas Baptist University only confirmed the principles taught in David Carr’s book and the things I learned while playing and most recently, coaching competitive sports. Lauren Secord—a multi-sport, All-State athlete at White Oak High School, two year 1st Team All-Conference and NCCAA All-American in Volleyball at Dallas Baptist University.

INTRODUCTION

This book is probably going to be different from any book you’ve read up until now. If you read the entire book, it has the power to change your life—literally. I hope it makes you think a whole lot about you. You want to be successful in sports or you wouldn’t be reading this book. However, more importantly, your parents and I want you to be successful in life. Life is far, far more important than any game you win or any accomplishment you achieve in sports. Sports should be looked upon as a great training camp for life. The lessons you learn by playing sports can go a long way in preparing you for the challenges you’re going to face in life—in your career, in your marriage and, yes, some day raising your own children that, like yourself, will probably delve into the world of sports. The neat thing about learning these valuable lessons through a game is that it’s far less expensive, less time consuming and far less hurtful to others around you than when you’re forced to learn some of life’s lessons in the real world later in life.

So, my challenge to you is to read this book in its entirety. That’s right—read all of it. Take a highlight pen and go to town marking the things you really like or want to remember. The points I really think you need to remember, I will ask you to memorize. I challenge you to memorize everything I ask you to memorize in this book. I refer to these passages as power passages because if you commit them to memory, they will give you power when you need it most—during the heat of the battle. It’s not easy memorizing things, but winning and reaching your potential aren’t easy either. This mental preparation will make a dramatic difference in your athletic career and, more importantly, it will become a part of you. Why is that important? I will answer that question throughout this book.

You want an edge, don’t you? You want something extra that your competition doesn’t have, right? Well, I’m here to say that as much as 90-95% of what you accomplish during your middle school and high school athletic career is going to be based on how you think—not on how tall, strong or fast you are. The physical elements—your size, strength, speed, etc., will be changing as you mature and develop physically, much of which is based on your genetic makeup or genes (I don’t mean Guess or Levis—it’s what you got from Mom & Dad and their Moms & Dads. Scary, isn’t it!). I call it the package God gave you. That is what you have to work with and what you do with it is up to you. Physically, you will have limitations—you will only be able to do so much. Let’s face it, you can’t become 6’5" just because you want to. You can’t run the 100 meters in 10 seconds just because you want to. You must understand that because of your genetic makeup, you will have some limitations. Therefore, much of your improvement will come in the area we’re going to concentrate on in this book—your mind.

The mind is an area often overlooked or treated far too lightly by most coaches. For example, when I coached in the public schools, I was amazed and even disgusted with how little it was discussed or dealt with. This book is about mental toughness. We will discuss what it is, how to get it, how to keep it, how it helps you win, how you can lose it and what it can mean to you long after your athletic career comes to an official end.

Ultimately, I want this book to help produce champions. I don’t necessarily mean champions in the athletic arenas across this country although I know these principles are going to help many achieve those accomplishments. I want you to become a champion in life—the ultimate game, the only game that really matters! I say that because I know many people who played on championship teams who are what I consider to be losers in life. And I know many people who never had the privilege of playing on great, championship teams who are some of the greatest winners I’ve ever seen in life. What I’m saying is, I know champions that are losers and I know losers who are champions.

Becoming a winner or a champion is about becoming the best you can be with what God has given you to work with. It has nothing to do with the score of a ballgame or the season record of a team you played on at one point in your life. These things are relative to hundreds of uncontrollable factors: age, size, weather, politics, your home-life, officials and referees, coaches, drugs, eligibility, cheating, luck, accidents etc. As you will learn from this book, all you can control is YOU—your attitude and your activity. That will be a full-time job, I assure you. The good news is this: based upon my definition of what a winner or champion actually is, any one that ever suits up to compete in an athletic event has the ability within themselves to become a WINNER, a true CHAMPION! But far more important is the fact that when you realize what I’m really talking about, you will be well on your way to becoming a WINNER and CHAMPION for life—not just the few ballgames played during your youth.

Our country needs more of its young people to make this commitment--to be a true CHAMPION for life. We really do. Enjoy this book and make it a text for your success. Commit to accepting my challenge to becoming the person God created you to be—a CHAMPION!

SPECIAL NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR:

In this book I use people as examples of mental toughness. Most of these people are professional or collegiate athletes you have probably heard of. In the course of writing this book, I found that time after time, a particular person I had referenced in the book had done something we’ll just refer to in general terms as negative. A lot of people would have much harsher words to describe it, but let’s just leave it at that. They messed up! Initially, I chose not to use this athlete’s name in my book and I removed all references to them. As time went by, I began to realize that if it took me much longer to get this book published, I would have no personal examples left to share with my readers, including my own. It’s important to realize that just because an athlete has exemplified mental toughness in the athletic arena of sorts, does not necessarily mean that particular athlete is mentally tough in all areas of his/her life.

My point is simply this, we are all human beings and we all have weaknesses in one area or another. I deal with many of these challenges in Chapter 13, The Facts of Life. The only thing you can really count on with people is that in time, they will disappoint. The only person that ever lived a perfect life was Jesus Christ, and to my knowledge, he never shot a basket, threw a football or took a swing at a fastball. That leaves the list of examples to use in this book as only those of normal, flawed people that stumble and fall from time to time, just like me and just like you. When looking at our sports heroes and other successful people from whatever background or walks of life, learn from the good and the bad. Take the good qualities and study them. Try and make them your own. Acknowledge the bad qualities as well and do your best to keep them from creeping into your life and establishing a stronghold.

I’ll end this commentary with a reference to something I heard said years and years ago: Except for the grace of God, there go I.

Chapter 1

MENTAL TOUGHNESS—What’s it all about?

When Michael Jordan was leading the Chicago Bulls to one NBA title after another, there was something special about him. It gave him a distinct competitive edge. Tiger Woods brings the same quality to the sport of golf, as does Tim Tebow to football. Granted, they are champions, but for good reason. When it comes to success in their particular areas of expertise, there’s something special about them, isn’t there? What do you think it is that makes them different? What quality sets them apart? In the most competitive of all arenas, how did they develop and maintain an edge in their respective sports?

Contrary to what some might believe, it wasn’t their physical attributes that set them apart. Underachieving physical specimens are a dime a dozen in the sports world today. It wasn’t even their tremendous skill levels, as we witness highly skilled athletes missing the mark time after time, getting cut from the team or facing early retirement. Ultimately, it’s not about how they play, or what they do—it’s as simple as this one thing: IT’S HOW THEY THINK. I call it MENTAL TOUGHNESS.

Most people would consider Michael Jordan to be the greatest basketball player of all time. Tiger Woods fell into this same category in the world of golf, and became so dominant that there was actually talk about tournaments without him in attendance almost deserving an asterisk beside the winner’s name: *Tiger wasn’t here. Tim Tebow, in his day, had the sports media and coaches all across America proclaiming him to be one of the greatest players, one of the greatest leaders and one of the greatest competitors ever to play college football. Jordan still has big-time mental toughness, only now he uses it in business. Woods and Tebow have extraordinary mental toughness and because of it they will continue to win consistently. If winning is important to you, then you must develop what these guys have, what all the others I mention in this book have, what anyone that ever wins anything worth winning has: mental toughness.

MENTAL TOUGHNESS—don’t leave home without it!

This book is about science--a study of the mind. It’s what I consider to be in Star Trek terms, the final frontier of athletic development and peak performance. If all the basics are already in place, then this is the missing link in your quest to be the best—your program to max out your personal potential. By basics, I mean you’re probably a pretty good athlete already or you wouldn’t have been motivated enough to even pick up this book. You’re probably already doing a lot of the things winners do: practicing your skills, lifting weights, working out, running, all kinds of conditioning, eating right, maybe taking supplements, etc. Congratulations and good job. I’m proud of you, but get this loud and clear: It’s got nothing to do with how much you can bench or your 40 time. You already have coaches in your face about all that stuff and they beat you to death with it. Keep working on it but there’s got to be more, and you know it. EVERYBODY’s doing what you’re doing! Big deal and welcome to the party. These days, everybody’s got a program! Everybody that wants to be competitive is already doing all that stuff! If just being competitive is good enough for you, just keep doing what you’re doing, and you’ll keep getting the same results you’ve been getting. However, if you want to WIN, and you want to win consistently, you must develop an edge over your competition.

Here’s the future. Here’s where your answer lies. Here’s the next big-thing—your edge, not just in sports, but more importantly, in life. It’s not a fad, it’s a major trend, and it’s here to stay. It’s going to become an entire industry all unto its own, a multi-billion dollar industry to boot. It’s on the verge of exploding right now—it’s the field of mental training. It’s all about MENTAL TOUGHNESS! Physically, you can only do so much. At some point you max out. At some point you stop getting better. At some point you hit the wall. Have you experienced it yet? Eventually, you will. Are you there now?

In the opening paragraph of this book, I alluded to something special that Jordan, Woods and Tebow possessed that gave them an edge—something that made them the champions they have become. I’ve boldly proclaimed that special quality to be their mental toughness. Here’s a list of athletes who also have it: Shawn Johnson, Nastia Liukin, Kurt Warner, Larry Fitzgerald, Peyton and Eli Manning, Adrian Peterson, Ladainian Tomlinson, Colt McCoy, Sam Bradford, LeBron James, Kobe Bryant, Deron Williams, Dwyane Wade, Dwight Howard, Mariano Rivera, Josh Hamilton, Albert Pujols and Roger Federer. Of course, there’s many more, but I think you get the picture.

Do you recognize most of these names? Do you see the similarities? Though all these athletes are unique in various ways and have different gifts and talents, they all share the same intangible quality: mental toughness. All the athletes mentioned above don’t just have it; they have it big-time! It has served them well for years! You must have it too if you want to become all that you’re capable of becoming. Notice from the list of names that size, shape, gender and race have nothing to do with it. The great news to everyone that wants to step up their game and reach much higher levels of achievement is this: IT IS AVAILABLE TO EVERYONE AND IT CAN BE DEVELOPED OVER TIME.

That’s what this book is all about—defining what mental toughness is, teaching you how to get it, how to keep it and how to use it to reach all your goals in life. You may already have a dose of mental toughness to some degree. You probably do. However this is a character trait that must be continuously developed and maintained. If it were easy to capture, harness and