Gemenicia: A Farewell to Epics

By Nicholas Lovelock

The second part of Arthur and Jo's strange adventures throughout the land of Discoucia, and a time when Archie the Water Goddess has made the ultimate sacrifice to rid the world of her nemesis, Cordelia Paradise, the Fire Goddess. However, things rarely go to plan and Arthur finds himself at war with Archie's hidden agenda rather than the insane task that he has to help Archie complete. Hidden around Discoucia in its sixteen major cities are sixteen gems that Archie must collect before a year is up. If she wins then Cordelia will disappear to another dimension and not return until she agrees to stop causing forest fires, volcanic eruptions and droughts. Team Archie has Arthur and Jo, who both have the understanding that by collecting these gems a natural order can be brought back and maybe Jo's father will get well again. Team Cordelia has Alicia May, who has a talent for becoming anyone and a deep malicious streak; and Iren, who has a fanatical hatred for Archie, which Archie herself doesn't like to talk about. Along the way they meet old friends and old enemies, as well as Archie having to perform miracles without the use of divine power. From the murky ruins of Tanalos to the haunted corridors of Ashin Dance Academy, the frozen caverns of Icester and the verdant streets of Proceur, the adventure will take them around Discoucia and beyond, unless Cordelia and Alicia May can stop them first…

• Language: English
• Publisher: Clink Street Publishing
• Release date: May 30, 2019
• ISBN: 9781913136079

Nicholas Lovelock

This is the second novel from the author Nicholas Lovelock. Lovelock lives and works in Oxfordshire

Book preview

I wasn’t expecting that

Archie listened intently to the ticking, and suddenly the ticking stopped. Oh no… she said. From out of the box burst a flurry of confetti, and the whole room was filled with red, yellow and pink streamers that seemed to be coming from everywhere. Arthur and Jo just stared in confusion at what they thought was going to be a bomb, but instead was something that was actually quite different.

What on earth is going on? By the way I never asked if we were actually still on Earth or are we somewhere else? asked Arthur.

You’re still on Earth but on a different dimensional plain which is tad hard to explain right now, but as to this stuff no idea, I think this is her idea of a joke, replied Archie.

So it’s from Professor Paradise? asked Jo.

Of course, this is just like her. Theatrical, bright, colourful and ironically funny, said Archie.

What do you mean by ironically funny? asked Jo.

She means for you three to probably die a horribly pink death and for me to really mess things up before being banished from my lovely home. I mean I would just start somewhere else so basically I’m saying that I’m sorry, said Archie.

We face death every day, not Lucy though, and she’s been quite lucky in that respect, said Arthur.

I had a psychotic husband which I might add is still out there, said Lucy, appearing out of nowhere.

Where were you? asked Jo.

I got lost, silly of me, she replied.

Edward will probably side with the Cordelia, as she likes to have allies who hate my allies. Then again he might not and I’m doing that human thing of worrying for nothing, said Archie.

You’re not human yet Archie, I bet you can’t wait for anxiety and aging, said Arthur.

Please don’t make this any worse than it already is, said Archie.

So we might have two enemies now? asked Jo.

Well not exactly, you see there’s an army of people out there who want to see you go down. With the help of Cordelia they will have a leader who will show them the way to get what they want… your head on a platter, said Archie.

After this depressing conversation Archie took them to the dining room, which had three huge glass chandeliers and a massive oak table. Candles lit up the white marble floors which were so shiny they looked like mirrors. The walls were made from white plaster and had ornate gold engraving around the paintings of landscapes. However none of them looked familiar to the three Discoucians.

What are these paintings of? asked Jo.

All of the paintings in this room are of my favourite place in the world, I give you ‘Merrie Old England’, said Archie.

Is England like Discoucia? asked Lucy.

Yes and no, it doesn’t have flying ships or fairy-tale-like geography, but we have a lush countryside that really cannot be beat in the way of beauty, explained Archie.

So how is it like here? asked Arthur.

Simply put, Discoucia is a version of England plus a heck of a lot of imagination, she replied.

So what is for dinner? asked Arthur.

One track mind Artie, said Jo.

Priorities Josephine, he replied.

I believe that my favourite cook will be bringing it out now, said Archie. From a door came a woman whose hands were empty, she simply stood and closed her eyes. Arthur looked at Jo, Jo looked at Lucy and Lucy looked at Archie, who in turn looked at the lady, who then outstretched both arms, and suddenly the table was filled with a feast of different kinds of food.

How did she do that? asked Arthur.

She thought about it and it all came together in her mind and on the table. Thank you Marie, once again you have shown that you have the culinary skills of a deity, said Archie. Marie smiled, bowed and walked out of the room without saying a word.

So you do have servants, said Jo.

Of course, though I am as benevolent as they come so I give them bank holiday weekends off, she said.

Bank holiday what? asked Lucy rhetorically.

Yes we know you’re the image of perfection, said Jo.

Oh no I am far from perfect, I’m a rogue deity with a heart of glass all tangled up in blue, replied Archie.

Humble as well, said Lucy.

I am just trying to soften the blow, when I become powerless for a year you are going to notice a big change, said Archie.

What won’t you be able to do? asked Jo.

I will be the same as you, but that isn’t such a bad thing since you are all amazing people, said Archie.

Is there any chance we can talk about something else, something a little less emotional? said Arthur.

What would you like to talk about? asked Archie.

Tell us about the gems, said Jo.

Well, back in the rocking 50s we created 15 gems, do you want me to name them all? asked Archie.

Please do, I didn’t know there were that many of them, said Jo.

We shall begin with Evermore and the Central Gem. It was there several miles beneath the ground that the three of us spent years creating the Infinity Vault. Down below is an incredibly huge network of rooms that will never be found by the mining of Elowe and Yande. The only way to open the door is if two of the four of us are present and that rarely happens, she explained.

The four being who exactly? asked Lucy, who wasn’t really listening.

Myself, Cordelia, Jonathan who is also called Hyperion but he doesn’t use that name much anymore, and Phoebe. Water, Fire, Air and Earth respectively, she replied.

I have never heard of this and I have every history book on Evermore, said Jo.

You wouldn’t as we kept it out of public knowledge because you would probably mess it up, not you specifically but one of your ancestors or descendants, said Archie.

If you’re a god does that mean that you’re immortal and therefore immune to pain? asked Lucy.

Archie took a steak knife and slit her arm. Out of the wound poured blue blood and in a split second the wound disappeared, and all trace of blood was gone. What was that supposed to signify? asked Jo.

I am immortal and immune to pain, I do not feel anything I don’t wish to feel and on top of that I don’t worry about anything concerning my general wellbeing, though that is going to change soon, she said.

Continue about the gems, said Arthur.

So the first gem is the Central Gem which is like a massive glowing icicle in the centre of the control panel, which has slots for the other gems. The next gem would probably be the first place we are going to start, in Tanalos, she said.

The sunken city, I really want to see it, said Lucy.

It is a nice place and the town of Alkenwedge is nice too, and above it are the Wondering Hills where the Misty Morning Rider can be met, she explained.

What is the gem called? asked Jo.

The Aquamarine Gem, and it sparkles with the beauty of all the mermaids swimming in the sea, she explained.

You sound like a poet, said Arthur.

It’s the only thing that’s giving my alcoholism any credibility, she replied.

So what about the next gem? asked Jo.

That would be the Sparkling Gem of Cesta which sat on the desk of Lord Aquatine’s study if you noticed, said Archie.

I was too preoccupied by the fact that he was disguised as the Sea Hag and the beauty of the Blue Coven, said Jo.

Well there it is, and the next gem was the one we took from Harrha which is now back there, since Paradise sent it back, she explained.

The Amethyst Gem, it is rather beautiful, said Arthur.

If we are going by the gems you are describing, then the next must be Chene, said Jo.

Now, that is the Amber Gem and the owner of that is a firecracker, said Archie.

It must be owned by the royal family, so that would be Princess Amberlia, Princess Sophina or Princess Mona, said Jo.

Which one is the firecracker? asked Lucy.

You will have to find that one out for yourselves, though the whole chapter or your hunt is going to be strange – sort of Dickensian without the snow and Tiny Tim, said Archie.

That’s something I will be interested to see, said Lucy.

The next Gem comes from Icester and it is the Sapphire Gem, like the one from the Shangri-La lighthouse but smaller, said Archie.

I don’t want to go back there again, said Jo.

I know and you don’t have to, I won’t force you to do anything, I removed that whole chapter just for you remember? said Archie.

We are your friends and we will stick by you, said Arthur.

Thanks, now the next Gem is somewhere that Arthur won’t want to go, and that is… ‘Thorisea’, said Archie, who found this part of the conversation to be the funny bit she was waiting for.

Actually I was planning on walking from Icester straight to Ashin, he replied sarcastically.

That’s over seven hundred miles honey, said Jo.

I’m well aware of that, at least then your sister is out of throttling range, he replied.

Could you please fill me in? asked Lucy.

In short Arthur disguised himself as my sister; I have to admit he looked very cute, and then we snuck into Harrha to stop his evil sister, explained Jo.

Not surprised in the slightest, replied Lucy.

So Arthur, I have something I want to show you, and we can discuss the rest of gems later, said Archie, who took Arthur away from the table and the girls who were discussing Arthur’s interesting week as Alex.

Archie took Arthur through a corridor that led to the spiral staircase. They walked up to the fifth floor and into Archie’s bedroom. Archie took Arthur to the back of the room, where a large door that looked strikingly like a large version of the Wardrobe door on the Nostradamus. I wonder what is in here, said Arthur. Archie pushed the door open and the sight that greeted Arthur’s eyes boggled his mind…

Inside was a Wardrobe, but the size of it was nothing short of incredible. It was like Madame Arrietta’s whole shop had been multiplied inside one room and all the clothes were Archie’s, which made Arthur wonder how she would ever get enough time to wear them. So, this is what you wanted to show me? asked Arthur.

Welcome to my Wardrobe Sir Arthur, every possible item of clothing you could possibly think of is right here, and if there is anything you want, just take it, she said.

You have a lot of dresses here, is this just a joke? asked Arthur.

Not at all, I can switch my gender you know, she said.

Where are the male clothes? he asked.

Archie took Arthur to a section that was full of different coloured jackets and waistcoats along with shirts and all other kinds of clothes. I see what you mean, by the way what are you going to wear? he asked.

This I guess, do I need anything else? she asked, holding her normal summer dress.

You’re a god in human form and you think you’ll not be noticed by anyone? I mean, come on, you need to be slightly disguised as someone, maybe you could change your hair or go into full male mode? he asked.

Nope, the last time I switched it was agony, she replied.

You mean physically, like changing certain unmentionable things? he asked.

You mean like things going in and others going out? she asked.

Kinda, yeah, he replied.

No, I had to stop drinking and be nice to people, smiling and speaking pleasantly. My jaw hurt for ages after all that and all the etiquette I had to remember was so much stuff like doilies and doing my fingernails, sheer agony, she replied.

But you’re female now, don’t you still do that stuff? he asked.

Nah, I refuse to. I mean come on Arthur it would be a stupid waste of time and effort pretending to be something I’m not, she replied.

Ask a silly question, he replied.

I mean, you would know all about that Arthur, she said sarcastically.

Excuse me?! he shouted.

Jo gave you a background on being a lady as I recall, nothing else implied, she replied.

Oh, continue, he said.

Well is there anyone you would suggest I be? she asked.

Actually, the size of Discoucia and how slowly news travels means you could be yourself, plus I’m pretty sure nobody really cares or would believe that you’re really the elemental goddess of water, he said.

Now that you mention it I suppose that I could just be myself, but I’m going to find a few things in case it gets cold, she replied, walking off into a dressing room.

Fine, fine, how long are you going to be? he asked.

Could you give me a hand? she asked.

Nope, I’m engaged so that would be wrong, he said.

Appreciate the compliment Arthur but I don’t have any interest in seducing you. I just want you help me put something on, she replied.

Okay but I’m coming in with my eyes closed so I don’t see anything, he said, walking in through the curtain.

What? she asked, not hearing him.

Oof! he said, crashing straight into Archie who collapsed to the floor with Arthur on top of her. The inside of the changing room was octagonal with very little light and three mirrors that had lights poised above them and looked very modern for the time period.

Archie actually had everything on apart from her cardigan, and her hair was now a mix of brunette and blonde and she looked at Arthur confused, but they ended up just laughing because of how stupid the scenario was. I just wanted you to help me with my cardigan as I never really figured out knots, but if you wanted to go further then that’s entirely up to you, she said.

As if, you look just like a Discoucian, he said.

That’s what you wanted, anyway we’re going to go through some things, she said.

Like what? he asked.

Well, you need to learn how to fight Cordelia; you see there are things in Discoucia that you wouldn’t believe are real. She has many children who have set up their own little worlds while pretending to be normal people. I mean even I have kids somewhere but they have a habit of reaching age 200 and staying like that forever. They can be maids in a cafe, the sons or daughters of wealthy people who are accused of vampirism for being so young all the time. Then there’s one who I’m probably going to have a lot of trouble with but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it, she explained.

Right, oh and do you have any gadgets or anything that might help? he asked.

Follow me, she said, and led him through a corridor that was an annex of the Wardrobe to a smaller room that was essentially a workshop. Arthur noticed that it wasn’t very clean but he reasoned that workshops rarely are.

Here, this might help, she said, handing him a phial that had six blue marble-looking things inside.

And what am I supposed to do with these? he asked.

Swallow them and you’ll be able to breathe under water for a time until you vomit the ball out again. They usually crack on impact so use them sparingly please. Next we have something for Jo, a ring that will give her power unlike anyone in athletics. She can run like the wind and lift a mountain with this on, but she’ll feel extremely tired afterwards so she needs to rest. The third item I’ll keep to myself for a while, just in case it’s needed, she replied.

Huh, I guess that’s alright then, he said, putting the phial in his pocket.

Why are you dressed like that, and why have you changed your hair colour? asked Jo.

So you’re going to be disguised as a Discoucian, any reason why you think that by changing your hair colour and what you were wearing you’ll be invisible? asked Lucy.

And are we going to call you Archie or something a little more fitting for a female? asked Jo.

Well as for your question Lucy, nobody notices you unless they want to notice you, by then it’s already too late. And Jo imagine all the effort you would have to put in calling me something other than Archie, your brain wouldn’t cope, she explained.

I beg your pardon, said Jo angrily.

You never get that where something’s been somewhere for years and once it’s been moved you keep going to the wrong place subconsciously. I do it with the microwave, same place for 24,000 years and they move it for the past six which means I keep going to the wrong place by accident, she replied.

Exactly what I have to do, said Arthur.

Oh for crying out loud I moved his frilly dresses from one side of the Wardrobe to the other, said Jo.

I had them in colour order, you could have at least asked me first, he said.

I’m sorry I couldn’t find you amongst the mountain of fur coats you seem to think we will need one day, said Jo, who had obviously hit a sore spot.

I was keeping them for the snow, you know that cold thing that falls from the sky? he asked sarcastically.

So are going now? asked Lucy, trying to move the conversation away from Arthur and Jo’s trouble in paradise moment.

Yes, fast forward to the ship, she said.

What do you mean fast forward to the ship, usually you say fast forward to the mountains or to the place we need to be, said Arthur.

Umm, yeah okay then, said Archie.

The Misty Morning Rider

The sun was shining and the sound of seagulls in the far off distance echoed through the rocky hills where Archie and Arthur now loitered. It was morning and despite it being the south, there was quite a chill in the air. The sun was rising however, and it began to warm up. In the shadow of the evil looking rocky outcrops it was still cold, which made the whole experience seem worrying for Arthur.

You just did it didn’t you, you just fast forwarded the whole scene so we could avoid the travelling, he said, not so bewildered since he expected it.

Of course I did, though I have to mention that Lucy and I had a little adventure on the way over but to her it seemed like a dream. Welcome to the Wondering Hills above Alkenwedge and Tanalos. The entrance to the home of the Misty Morning Rider who will soon come ‘wondering’ through the hills, she said.

We’re going to meet the Rider; the collector of dead people’s souls who decides if they go up or down, isn’t that dangerous? he asked.

Not at all since nobody here is dead, so she won’t try to claim their souls from their bodies and the girls are asleep so she can tell the difference, said Archie.

Just as Archie spoke, another ship landed, about half a mile away, and sat silently between some rocks. Is that Paradise? asked Arthur.

It probably is, I don’t know who else would be out here at this time of the morning, she replied.

Are you nervous? he asked.

I’m terrified, I don’t know what to expect at all. I feel confident and happy that I have complete control over everything and please don’t take that as an egotistical remark, but when I lose it then I have no idea how I am going to feel, she replied.

Well I suppose we should go, we’re heading for a showdown anyway, said Arthur.

How on earth did you think of that phrasing, it’s way too perfectly recited to be coincidental? she asked.

No time to explain that now, look at the ground, he said.

A thick fog, about a foot deep came creeping around the pathways that snaked around the rocks in the hills. I think our host is here, said Archie, who climbed down into the fog, followed by Arthur. They waded through it and it wisped up as they dodged little rocks that were scattered across the path. They finally came to a long road that went straight between where the two ships were parked. There were two large stones that stuck up like jagged teeth, and they seemed to be a gateway into the pass that extended out into the foothills before they became the Celestial Mountains.

Archie and Arthur saw that two other people were coming from the other ship, which could be clearly seen now. It was a black ship, though it didn’t look evil, but looked sleek and advanced. Good morning Cordelia, lovely day for a little walk, don’t you think so? called Archie.

Good morning, Archaelia, I trust you had a pleasant trip, replied one of the people.

Of course, travelling instantly is something that I will miss indeed, replied Archie.

She means for us all to die, why are you being nice to her? asked Arthur.

In her defence, I am trying to kick her out of the best place she has ever lived, so I’m just being pleasant for the sake of being of pleasant, she replied.

You are both mad, he replied.

Yeah, but good mad right? she asked.

I trust you with my life, just remember that I am a father now, he replied.

Point taken, she replied.

Professor Paradise looked completely different, and it actually scared Arthur slightly. Her bright pink hair glistened in the rising sun, and the rest of what she wore was completely different to what Arthur expected to see for a super villain, but she looked non-threatening in every respect apart from her eyes, which concealed a deep seated maniacal anger. She wore a short but magnificent summer dress in bright yellow that was so bright it was close to being neon, and the bow she had on her chest was large enough to be giving her back problems. I think it is time we met our dear friend up ahead, and is that who I think it that you have brought? asked Archie.

This is Iren, she is the daughter of the King of the Merpeople that live in the caves under the sea, I thought I’d bring her along for reunion’s sake, she explained. Iren was a miserable looking girl dressed mainly in blue with brown floppy hair that was suffering from the fog like Arthur’s was, however the effect didn’t do anything to Archie or Cordelia’s hair which remained as perfect as it always was.

I see, and why exactly is she with you may I ask? asked Archie.

She is my new assistant, and she will be with me throughout the whole of this little adventure, she replied.

Not very fair taking Iren of all people but shall we go? asked Archie.

Before they left Corky appeared and held Arthur back for a moment. Excuse me, but I wanted to ask you about something that happened while you were gone, he said.

Can’t it wait Cornelius, I am a little bit busy? said Arthur.

I was threatened by a green person with no face! he blurted out.

And yet here you are so it couldn’t have been that bad, said Arthur who walked off to join the others.

If I get killed for this I’m haunting you first! he shouted. Arthur merely stuck his thumb up while Corky raised a different finger which made Arthur chuckle a little.

Archie led, and Cordelia went second. Arthur and Iren lagged back because they were both afraid of the Misty Morning Rider, just as a mortal would be afraid of a being that breathed death into anyone who was doomed to die. However Iren wasn’t mortal but just afraid of things she didn’t understand, and she didn’t really want to walk anywhere near Archie. They moved through the jagged pass that felt chilly, because it was shaded from the sun and the fog was creeping up around their knees. The rocks looked like gaping mouths trying to swallow any unwary traveller who blundered about. So, Iren, are you here against your will? he asked.

Don’t talk to me, I don’t have to speak to a lower form of life like you, commoner, she said with such acidity and venom that she could have scared a cobra.

OK, I have no time for stuck up prima donnas like you, you can walk by yourself, said Arthur, who proceeded to catch up with Archie. Iren was joined by Cordelia who seemed to come out of nowhere.

What was going on with you two? asked Archie.

Oh I am done with her, I asked her if she was brought here against her will and she began spitting venom at me out of nowhere, he explained.

Then they are a perfect duo just please don’t judge her too harshly, she’s not one hundred percent about anything, said Archie.

Are you okay? he asked.

Of course not, are you? she asked.

Not really because I don’t really want to meet the Rider, what is she like? asked Arthur.

Very good at her job and does it with a certain passion, which is very rare these days, she replied.

I meant what does she look like? asked Arthur.

It depends on if she is in a good mood, then she rides a red duocorn called Andrew, and she has night sky shadows on her face that hide the fact that she only looks 80, she explained.

How old is she? asked Arthur.

I forget, I think only a couple of months younger than me or exactly the same age. See I have no clue about how I came to be and neither does she, she replied.

And does she often get in a bad mood? asked Arthur.

No but she doesn’t really care for Cordelia, so meeting her won’t make her any better but I’m hoping that the prospect of taking her powers and leaving her mortal will make her feel better, she replied.

Why does she dislike Cordelia? he asked.

The age and height jokes mostly, but also the fact that I don’t like her, and she likes me so she kinda has to not like her if you get my drift, she replied.

Is she good looking? asked Arthur.

You’ve met her before and I’m not telling you who she was because she wants it to be a surprise, she replied.

You know Iren? he asked.

Not as much as she would hope but yeah, she replied.

Well, what the heck is she doing living in a kingdom of sea people, and how is there a kingdom of sea people anyway? he asked.

Maybe you should read the appendices and find out, she replied, and made a gesture that was as if to say that the conversation was over.

They came to a large stone gateway that was sealed shut, and the evil looking gargoyles seemed to stare into Arthur’s heart. They look unhappy, said Arthur.

She is very good at sculpting so this is merely a product of her boredom, but we now need to wait for her to return and open the door, said Archie.

You mean that she isn’t here? asked Arthur.

No, she is out collecting souls and in the morning she wanders through the hills to take her souls back to the Howling Chasm, she said.

That doesn’t sound pleasant, said Arthur.

I assure you it is not but we are not here for that, we are here to ask for help, said Archie, who sat down on a rock and watched the opening to the rocky glen.

This place seems very similar to the Dimholt don’t you think? asked Cordelia.

No actually it reminds me more of Cheddar Gorge, retorted Archie.

Touché, so you see what I mean? she asked.

I guess, but if it was you wouldn’t want to be sitting here would you? replied Archie.

Not at all, how long is she going to be? asked Cordelia.

I have no idea; she doesn’t stick to any kind of schedule if you remember rightly, replied Archie.

The whole scene changed instantly, the temperature dropped and the light dimmed. Archie and Paradise didn’t notice, but Arthur and Iren did, and Iren began to shiver. She was wearing a dress that didn’t have sleeves, and could be seen visibly shaking. Arthur walked over to her, took his jacket off and put it around her. At first she shirked away, but then she felt the cold again and decided to keep it. Thank you, but I expected you to give a higher person like me your jacket, said Iren.

I think that you may be deluded madam but you can carry on with your delusion, I just feel better about myself anyway for being a gentleman, he replied, and walked back to Archie.

Then the sound of hooves up the path could be heard, and out of the fog rode a ragged figure on a red horse. She wore brown tattered robes, and they looked extremely old. However the wearer was so young, that she looked completely out of place. She had long blonde hair that was so thick and wavy that it looked like it had just been brushed. It shimmered in the half light, as did her pale face, which was that of a child. Good morning, could we please talk to you? asked Archie.

Good morning, what are you doing here and why is that us three have come together? she asked in a soft lyrical voice.

Well Phoebe, it’s because I have the chance to say goodbye to Cordelia here, and she will never come back or at least this will give her time to cool off on some planet in a distant galaxy, said Archie.

I’m listening Archie and please don’t waste my time, some idiots in Chene thought it would be a bright idea to jump from one building to another blindfolded, and they call it mass suicide and not simple stupidity, she explained.

Ah I see, it won’t take long as all you have to do is take our godlike powers for a year, and then we can get on with this competition, explained Archie.

Oh another wager, and what happens if Cordelia wins? she asked.

She gets my domain, the Twilight Vale and all things therein without having to do any creation at all, said Archie.

She can’t, that isn’t right! she said.

That is the stake, if I lose then I leave for a while, no classy evil, said Cordelia.

And if I lose I have to live in Jalhenna, and turn it into Utopia again from scratch, said Archie.

And what constitutes a victory? she asked.

All gems of Discoucia placed in the stone table in the Infinity Vault, and that way High King Olandine will be cured and all the ills in Discoucia will be healed, though it might be psychosomatic so we’ll just have to see what happens, said Archie.

My victory will be the old king dead and replaced by that straight-laced dunce Alexandra, no healing of Discoucia and the place put into turmoil, explained Cordelia.

You know, I would like to add on something to this. If Archie wins, Cordelia must give up her annoying evil ways and the two of you must work out your differences like civilised super beings, she said.

Oh come on, me be friends with her? shouted Cordelia.

And if Cordelia manages to stop Archie, then Archie must work with Cordelia in punishing the wrongdoers in any way Cordelia sees fit, she replied.

You can’t make me into a nasty person, I more saintly than all the saints put together! shouted Archie.

If I may, I’d like to say a word, said Arthur.

Approach mortal, she said.

It’s Arthur your, umm, godliness I suppose, but you already knew that. I can’t begin to guess who you’ve been masquerading as when you’ve met me in the past but that hardly matters right now. As Archie’s mortal representative I would like to agree to those terms, and further more Archie will agree to spend some make peace with her known children, as will Cordelia here. I’m sure one will agree to that if the other does too, he explained.

What are you doing Arthur? asked Archie.

Taking control of the situation since you two have a habit of arguing too much, he replied.

You know what, I agree as I’m sure of my coming victory, said Cordelia.

Then I agree as I’m sure of my impending victory and Cordelia’s looming failure, said Archie.

Very well I shall referee this contest, but I will lay down some ground rules to prevent any cheating, she said.

Why are you three looking at me? asked Cordelia, who was actually planning to do everything by the book because she would have a much better victory that way…

Rule number one is since death would be meaningless to gods despite the loss of power, I forbid the killing of each of you, your companions go with you at their own risk so they are exempt from the no death rule, she said.

Agreed, said Cordelia, completely satisfied with this as it made a change from impersonating girlfriends and destroying people’s relationships..

Agreed, said Archie, who looked at Arthur with a degree of nervousness, while he was looking at Phoebe and didn’t notice.

Second rule, once the gems are placed in the table they are unobtainable, and will not be released for the remainder of the contest, once won, they are always won, the point of Cordelia is to slow you down, she explained. They both nodded and awaited the next rule.

The third rule is that the gems must all be collected by midnight on December the thirty-first, if not, Cordelia wins and gains the domain of the Twilight Vale, she said. They both agreed and the last rule was to come forth immediately.

The fourth rule is that I shall be setting in motion a chain of events designed to spur you on, which will begin with the life force of the planet being removed, split and placed in the sixteen gems that will give them a different kind of power that will seem like it has always existed, she explained, and this seemed like a bit of a dark and dire rule but was agreed to by Archie and Cordelia.

The final rule is that Cordelia can do what she wants to slow you down, and you can do whatever you want to gain the gems, all is fair, she explained.

Agreed, said Cordelia, now wondering if it would be more fun to impersonate boyfriends.

Yes, agreed, said Archie, who wondered if she could turn things around and try to stop Cordelia from stopping her. However she doubted her human brain could comprehend plans within plans within plans so abandoned the idea.

Now shake hands and I will relieve you of infinite elemental power for the next year, she said while dismounting from her horse.

Cordelia walked over to Archie and put her hand out, all too eager to agree to the contest. I will give you five minutes to talk to your friends and then I will take your powers for safekeeping, said Phoebe. Archie walked over to Arthur, and Cordelia walked over to Iren.

Are you sure that you want to help me with all of this Arthur? she asked.

Hey, if I’m the one who saves the Empire then I can retire with a massive castle on the most beautiful island on the planet, I’ll risk my life for that, he replied.

What about Jo and Lucy? she asked.

You live in a hallucinogenic dreamland, if they wanted to follow you then what’s to stop them following you now? he asked.

Fair enough, she replied.

Back on the other side of the scene was the strange conversation that was taking place with Cordelia and Iren that only they knew the true meaning of.

The household guardian has got the purity and innocent flower on the hook, said Iren.

He’s the man and he knows the game, how’s the other, the one born from daylight? asked Cordelia.

They’ll come round eventually, maybe some persuasion is in order, said Iren, looking back to the Nostradamus.

The two walked back to Phoebe and they formed a circle which caused three lights to appear above them. Above Archie was a blue orb, above Cordelia was a red orb and above Phoebe was a green orb. The red and blue then moved above Phoebe and her orb became a brighter green. It then moved back into her and