No F’ in(g) Murder

By Mavis Christine Bedford M.A.

Coming to grips with the plot of this play is one of the challenges that
you will be facing when watching it because nobody is who you think they are. Just like in real life when browsing on the web, it can be
“just an illusion”! It is easy to say that Jim, Sally, and Greg take us along
the winding road of a Cornelian drama, but the discoveries that you
will endeavour to make will come from the absurdity and antics spoken
and acted by the protagonists delving in irony. The absurd is central
to the theme of this narrative and builds the magic of the play, shell shocked with verbal and active interactivity torpedoed at the spectators. The pedagogical aspect of this play is no mystery to anybody discovering this unique experience of an out-of-the-ordinary story leading us
to laugh at our own life experiences.
No F’in(g) Murder is part of a collection called The Virtual Dreaming ConneXtion, available also in French.

Mavis-Christine Bedford was born in the very north of England then immigrated to Australia where she stayed for four years. On returning to England, she fell in love with a French man and has spent the rest of her life in France, first in the north then now in the south. She has a dog who takes her walking, and many hobbies such as cooking and baking her own bread. Mavis-Christine is fascinated by the chateaux and cathedrals in France and likes studying the symbolic thought that went into their building. She is also a linguist and enjoys learning new languages. Mavis-Christine is the author of four adventure stories expressing the dangerousness and violence of ending modern-day slavery. She has a son and three grandchildren and is in love with Provence, a land which inspires her creativity in the natural beauty of the village where she has been living for the past five years.
 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Europa Edizioni
• Release date: Jan 31, 2023
• ISBN: 9791220137393

Book preview

Introduction

No F’ in(g) Murder is a play on cyber criminality (a hot topic on the news) and scammers who exploit the confidence of their victims through love or the lack of it.  Parallel to that there is a true love story and two other main characters giving forth comic and anecdotic situations throughout.  The play is interspersed with quid pro quos or misunderstandings. This story is of interest to everybody whatever their origin, creed, age or sex.  Taking the situations through to derision renders the comical side of the play. The numerous songs follow the thread of the story of love and woe as well as fun with I’m on a Dating Site. 

Characters

-Jim

Piano player and composer, intellectual, snobbish and in love with Sally’s bum then makes friends with Peter, the boy from Greg's next door.

-Sally

Student, private detective, disguised as a hired killer and in love with the Stranger from the Web (Greg). She symbolises all the victims of these cybercrimes of love.

-Greg, the Stranger from the Web

Police Psychologist disguised as a scammer in love with his so-called victim Sally.  He is a very handsome black man with well-developed muscles.

-Peter, the Boy from Next Door

The boy from next door, police trainee psychologist falls in love with Jim's music.

His vocation is to be a dancer thus Jim, musician and shooting star, fascinates him.

-The Dancers and Singers and Musicians

Drums, guitar, up-right piano, saxophone and double base, harmonica etc.

The dancers are like in the stalls in the bathroom of Greg and they react to the happenings by onomatopoeias. During the telephone conversation between Sally and Greg the dancers form a circle by lying flat on the floor like the African scanners at work. 

They are dressed in skin suits covering all their bodies and heads with luminous bands running down them. They have white cardboard masks with no faces on them.

The actors should be in their early twenties and of different ethnic origins.  One of the dancers should wear a dog collar to celebrate the wedding of Sally and Greg.

-A Voice from Above/Cock 

It crows at decisive moments throughout the comedy and appears before the final curtain as a projection (special effect) of the crow in Pathé News, so to speak.  It also follows the moods of Jim. There are eleven different crows within the play. 

10

Options

-Projection of a cupid with a water pistol in a holster on his shoulder with all the currencies floating around him and his bow firing poisoned arrow into the heart of Sally.

-Projection of Eros with a salad bowl full of bank notes.

-Warm-up actor who gives instructions and information to the audience.  They could be older than the other players.

Settings

-Jim’s bedsitter.

-Stranger from the Web’s bathroom.

-A bar in which to celebrate the wedding.

The theme music I'm on a Dating Site is played up to the raising of the curtains.

Act I

Scene 1

The Scene is set in Jim’s bed-sitter.