The Marriage Wars: Book One

By Melissa Gowdy Baldwin

Ten years apart. Three nights of uncovered secrets. One decision to change it all.

Miserable and bound in a marriage she never wanted, Olivia Smith has played her part in The Nation's marriage system for the last ten years. She had two children and supported their schooling, cared for her mother and sister, and never used her C

• Language: English
• Publisher: Atmosphere Press
• Release date: Apr 4, 2023
• ISBN: 9781639888641

Book preview

The

Marriage

Wars

____

Book one

Melissa gowdy Baldwin

atmosphere press

© 2023 Melissa Gowdy Baldwin

Published by Atmosphere Press

Library of Congress Control Number 2022917072

Cover design by Ronaldo Alves

No part of this book may be reproduced without permission from the author except in brief quotations and in reviews. This is a work of fiction, and any resemblance to real places, persons, or events is entirely coincidental.

Atmospherepress.com

For my family.

The personal is political.

-Carol Hanisch

The Nation

MARRIAGE EDICTS

February 14, 2030

TO: All citizens under the newly formed Nation and any persons who want to freely participate in The Nation

WHEREAS, the people of the state want to change the genetic future of our dire circumstances; and

WHEREAS, the U.S. Government can no longer secure viability of population health; and

WHEREAS, humanity is morally corrupt and in social decline;

NOW, THEREFORE, notwithstanding previous laws under the former State of California Constitution, I hereby issue the following EDICTS for any citizen desiring to marry under Nation law and participate in a truer and healthier future for humanity:

Edict 1:

Both citizens must be citizens of the Nation.

Edict 2:

Both citizens must only be within one tier of each other in the five-tier class system.

Edict 3:

Both citizens must have certified functioning reproductive organs and no prior health conditions.

Edict 4:

Both citizens must be heterosexual or two females only for population growth.

Edict 5:

Both citizens must be within the prescribed skin-tone rating set by the Nation.

Edict 6:

Both citizens must share either monotheistic, polytheistic, or atheistic religious beliefs.

Edict 7:

Both citizens must agree to have children within the first two years of marriage.

Edict 8:

Both citizens must share an educational status approved by Pre-License Board.

Edict 9:

Both citizens must complete the Pre-License Board DNA test to promote genetic diversity and population health.

Edict 10:

Both citizens must agree to be implanted with the Nation microchip prior to the marriage ceremony to monitor genetic abnormalities, physical and mental health, reproduction, and location. After a child reaches age one, parents must consent to chips being implanted into the child.

Like THE GUBERNATORIAL TERM EDICT, these EDICTS have no expiry date and are effective immediately unless otherwise modified by Nation Governors.

A.T. Valentin

West Nation Governor Valentin

Chapter 1

We all have them. Ghosts. The ghosts that haunt our daily life in the most inconvenient and selfish ways. Ghosts from the past that move to the present when the smell of sandalwood fills the room from a scented candle. When a song long dead rises from the grave by a new indie band. When a name floats through the air kissing your ears over the deafening noise around you. Echoing on the lips of the person across the room drinking champagne.

Ghosts.

Always present.

Always sitting quietly in the background, watching.

Always ready to take your hand and pull you to the other side.

And all too often, you pray you won’t resist when they do.

It had been ten years.

Ten years since Ethan and I were ripped from each other’s lives. Just another casualty to yet another war. A war that trapped me in the bed I lay in now. A war that tethered my family to the Nation. A war that forced me to make a choice and marry a man I could never love.

As I rolled away from him, Thomas stirred slightly. I quietly collected my phone and started to read the top selected stories on my holographic feed. No Seasons Needed: Year-Round Food Stations Available Now, Rebels Try to Storm State Buildings, Digital Currency: How You Can Stay Safe.

Another regular day.

My eyes wandered through customized feeds convincing me of my needs. Something that would improve my children’s foreign language abilities. An article citing how I could be a better spouse in just three simple steps. A beautifully dressed dark-skinned woman heralding the latest yoga pants that contoured our bodies just right.

And then there it was. A small orchid helix hologram, the symbol of the Nation, was floating just above the top of my feed: 11:00am - Challenge Center. I untangled the sheets from my body and left Thomas sprawled out across the bed.

As I tiptoed across cool tile flooring to the spare room, I thought about how I never loved him in the ways other wives loved their Nation husbands. I loved the life I knew he could give me after the Nation took everything away from me. I made the choice to marry him because it would help my mother and sister survive in the Nation once our tier status was jeopardized. My father’s death, my mother’s uncertain financial security, and my sister’s cancer and the uncertainty with her health required a sacrifice. Once Ethan and I could no longer legally be married, his disappearance from our lives shook the ground I walked on. He left a promise unkept to us all, widening a wound that never fully healed.

My loyalty served my family, my husband, and the Nation.

I settled into the sofa, careful not to wake the children down the hall, clicked on the button below the hologram, and read: Click on portal link to be connected to Challenge Center Welcome Message. I adjusted the volume, and when the link finally loaded, I sank deeper into the smooth cushions, waiting for the long overdue offer of hope. The sound crawled through the HoloPhone, and a middle-aged man in a lavender velvet suit appeared.

"Congratulations! You have made it to year ten of your marriage. We would like to personally thank you for contributing to the marriage stability success. Your commitment to your partner and the Nation’s desired way of life has greatly improved not only our community, our economy, our health, and our strong state in the global world but also your personal growth as a member of this elite group. We congratulate you on a job well done.

"As you know, the Vaccine Wars divided our country and caused pain and suffering for many. Without the commitment from humble citizens of the Nation like you, our great state would be lost and in ruin. We count on you for the health, prosperity, and happiness of our future.

"Because of your commitment, the Nation would like to reward you with a Challenge Pass. The Challenge Pass consultation appointment is at 11:00am today. Remember, it is not a requirement to activate the Challenge Pass. You may continue doing the great work for our Nation without attending your appointment—no infractions or demerits will be assigned to you for not using it during this ten-year term. You may, like years five and seven, choose from the Marriage Rewards Bonus System Menu instead of activating your Pass.

"However, if you would like to use your Challenge Pass, you need to attend your appointment today at 11:00am at your local Challenge Center. Your reward will include three nights with male and female attendants procured specifically for you. During your stay, you’ll enjoy only the finest accommodations and service. Your commitment to your marriage will be recognized at every moment.

The Nation would like to thank you again for your commitment to your union and your loyalty to the right way of life.

The hologram disappeared into the phone, and I let out a long breath. Finally, I had something to look forward to that was only for me. I sneaked back into our room, trying to go unnoticed. Closed the door and crawled into bed.

Our marriage followed every requirement correctly. Our children were born in years one and three. I made sure to participate in the community, stepping up even more in year four, even though I was exhausted from taking care of two small children. I returned to work for year five. I didn’t use my Challenge Pass but instead focused on the reward system bonuses. My service to the Nation was impeccable. I deserved something more this year. I longed for something more this year.

This would be my first Challenge Pass. The bonus I chose for year five took Thomas and me on a private jet to the Gulf of Mexico. A private yacht with a full-service staff gave me just enough to make it to year seven. My seven-year itch Marriage Reward System Bonus took Thomas and me to the Maldives. He went on diving excursions, and I melted away into a king-sized bed with 360-degree views of the ocean. I think we both pretended to believe in the blessings of the Nation rather than ever admitting to each other whether we used our bonuses or Challenge Passes.

My mind wandered while Thomas snored next to me. A part of me worried about the logistics of the pass. How could I account for a luxury vacation not happening this year? Would he know I used my pass? Would he be using his pass this year too? Ten years was a long time to be with anyone, especially for a man of his caliber. Maybe I could secretly buy a bonus—a vacation nearby, down the coast. That, of course, would need to come later, after I untangled myself from my Challenge Center stay.

I wondered what the selection panel would look like. How customized would my data be? Would they put me with someone who had pale skin like Thomas? Or would my panel be filled with darker-skinned men that looked like Ethan? Would it feel different from being with Thomas? Would it feel different from being with Ethan? The only two men I had anything to compare to. One, a constant presence whom I struggled to connect with. And one, a ghost, whom I couldn’t raise from the grave if I tried.

My Ethan. The first and only true love of my life. I wondered where he was. If he was happy. If he had married someone else. If he was even still alive. The memory of our last time together—we were supposed to meet for dinner, but he never showed. He just disappeared. Maybe he couldn’t take our appeal being denied. Maybe taking care of my mother, sister, and me was too much. Maybe he thought I could never give him children or the Nation life he wanted. I rationalized his leaving. Maybe he left me for a sanctuary state—somewhere he could escape the strings of the Nation and be happy with someone else. Someone with less fire or family baggage. Someone he could create his own life with.

Even with the pain of his uncertainty, I instinctively squeezed my body and pretended they were his brown arms, not my olive ones, pressing against me.

I felt the bed shift. Perfectly manicured hands touched my arm.

"Good morning, my Olivia. Happy anniversary … ten years. All. With. You." Thomas pulled my face in, kissed me, and proceeded to move his hands over my body. I reacted as I usually did and let him take control because that was part of being a good wife in the Nation. I grounded my back against the 400-thread-count sheets. My eyes wandered to the door. It was closed. The kids would be in bed a little bit longer, hopefully letting their father do his Nation work.

When it was over, he got out of bed, his chiseled pale body illuminated in the morning light. A cold shiver went down my spine as his remnants spilled out of me.

Are you still okay with the car picking you up at six for dinner tonight?

Yeah, Mulvaney’s, right?

Yes. I can’t wait for you to try the food. The chef is one of the first people in the city to get a food station. He makes everything onsite. Jack told me that the place even has one of the meat stations. The Nation is letting Mulvaney’s try it out since it’s the Director’s favorite restaurant.

Can’t wait.

I’m going to shower—want to join me? Maybe one more anniversary round? His tone pitched playfully.

I would love to, but I think I need to save myself for later, I said, pretending to close my eyes.

Your loss. He laughed and left to the bathroom.

I looked up at the coffered ceiling. How had it been ten years? There were moments when my time felt like a sentence that would never end. Then there were times with the children that seemed like it was going by too fast. Time is a funny thing—always speeding up when you want it to slow down and slowing down when you want nothing more than for it to move faster. In the upcoming years, I would need to be more present. My time with the children was almost halfway over. They would grow and leave me for their own Nation life one day. Who would I even be then without them?

Thomas turned the water off and stood next to the dresser in a towel. He fumbled for his boxers and said, I am going to be busy all day, but if you have time, we could do lunch.

I would love to, but I have to go to the clinic this morning; Mrs. Hill is coming back in. I shrugged my shoulders and lied. I told her I would be there.

He turned around unconvinced. Okay, well, at least I still get you tonight. He walked back over, kissed my forehead, and said, Want me to make you and the kids breakfast?

That would be great, thank you.

Of course, my bride. He walked backward, doing a little dance towards the door, and hummed I Only Have Eyes for You, the song from our wedding.

I couldn’t help but smile. You are definitely something.

His voice echoed into the hallway. Already in the kitchen, he said, "Yes, but I am definitely your something."

Rose and Lucas sat at the table. I watched quietly for just a moment. Rose, at almost ten years old, was growing up so fast—one day, she would be standing in a doorway just like me, looking at her family. My only hope was that she would be able to marry for love, not just for loyalty to the Nation. Lucas, just shy of eight, still as innocent as possible, was harder to picture as an adult—something I was thankful for because I never wanted to let him go. I thought about the future often. Picturing myself on my deathbed, a shell of a body gnarled with age. My children were reminders, validations, that at least I had contributed to something more than just a government’s plan for control.

Daddy made waffles, Mama, Lucas said through syrup-kissed lips.

He did? My hands scooped his messy head of hair and pulled his forehead up to mine. And how are the waffles, my little soldier? He was already in his Nation Security Police costume from last Halloween. Most days, he refused to wear anything but it. Hopefully, just another one of his phases.

Yummeeeeee, Mama, he growled like many boys did, hands raised up, covered in the syrupy sweetness of our rationed supply, and went back to devouring the brown wicker-colored waffle.

I looked towards Thomas, questioning the indulgence.

What? It’s our anniversary … it’s a special day … besides, I can always get more. You know, I am sort of a big deal, his cocky smile stretched between his salt-and-pepper beard.

Yes, Mr. I-got-a-promotion-and-still-bring-it-up.

We exchanged grins.

And what do you think, Rose?

They’re good. Rose, closely approaching the dreaded tween phase, carefully cut her breakfast into perfectly square pieces. She carried her father’s need for perfection and control. Whereas Lucas followed in my footsteps—at least, footsteps from who I used to be before the Nation. Waiting to breathe in every breath of life like it was our last. My breath nowadays was carefully constricted, mirroring my trapped existence. Perks like real maple syrup served as little cups of O2 I would greedily swallow in big gulps hoping it could last until my next fix.

You know I don’t like indulging them. Aren’t the maple syrup farms closing because of the drought? My voice shifted.

With his mouth full of food, he said, Oh yeah. He smacked. But you know, there’s always someone that has access. No big deal, you know. And when it runs out, it runs out. His body hunched down towards Lucas, and his voice deepened like a friendly ogre. Besides, maybe Mama and Daddy will just have to leave their jobs and start their own maple syrup farm.

His voice made both children giggle, but only Lucas replied, Yeah, yeah, yeah. His arms waved in the air, the scar on the small of his back exposed. I winced and looked away. Thomas noticed but didn’t say a word. They all went back to eating as I sat down and served myself breakfast.

Should we give Mama her gift?

Lucas hopped out of his seat, sticky fingers and all.

Uh, uh, uh, soldier, let’s clean your hands before you get Mama’s gift, okay? Thomas dipped the cloth napkin in his water and proceeded to erase the syrup from Lucas’s small fingers.

He squirmed, resisting but eventually getting free, and then walked over to the living room. He picked up a soft pink bag with an iridescent ribbon, walked back over, and handed it to me.

Thank you, little man.

Inside the bag lay a small turquoise box.

Tiffany’s? I looked at Thomas. I thought only tier-fives were allowed to shop there?

Like I said, there’s always someone.

I opened the box. A bracelet with four charms lay against the white fabric pillow. A pink rose, a glass lightbulb, an olive branch, and a silver heart dangled whimsically when I lifted it out.

It’s beautiful, Thomas.

Each charm represents one of us, Rose explained. The rose is for me, the light for Lucas, an olive branch for you, and a heart for Daddy because he’s your heart.

Thank you. I looked at the children and blew kisses in the air. I squeezed Thomas’s hand and mouthed, Thank you.

He pulled my hand up to his mouth and kissed it. Happy anniversary, Olivia.

I thumbed the lightbulb charm. Thomas held my hand. We had named Lucas after my father. My father’s death almost destroyed my mother, sister, and me. Thomas was our guardian angel and played a key role in bringing us back into a normal Nation existence, once my father was gone.

My HoloPhone rang in the other room. I tapped on my watch, and our nanny’s image floated above my wrist.

Penny! Lucas yelled.

Hey, little man! Hey, Rose.

Hi, Penny. Rose went back to her carefully calculated breakfast.

Hey, Thomas. Hi, Olivia—happy anniversary, you two!

Thank you, Penny, I said, rotating my wrist so it left only me in view.

So, I am running a little late. I’m really sorry, but I won’t be able to get there for another hour or so. I can still take the kids to school. I just won’t be there to get them ready.

I looked at Thomas, and he waved like it was no big deal. But I knew what that meant—I would be the one taking care of the children this morning instead of getting ready for my day.

No problem, Penny. I am not going in to work until later. I can get them ready.

Thanks. Sorry again. I’m still on for tonight, too, right?

Yep. Thanks, Pen, Thomas replied with waffles in his mouth.

Okay. Have a good day at work, Thomas. Olivia, I will see you soon. Her face disappeared back into the face of my watch.

After breakfast, Thomas gathered his things, kissed us goodbye, and left in his new black SUV. He worked for a genetics company that had contracts with labs throughout the Nation. He climbed quickly to regional lab manager, gaining access to multiple high-level officials. The fully loaded company SUV, unlimited access to electricity or diesel, and premier access to almost anything were perks our family enjoyed. The day Thomas proposed, he hired a driver to take us through Napa Valley. We kept the privacy partition up, drinking wine while Thomas moved his hands all over my body. Alcohol helped me stay in the moment. Not trailing too far in the past with Ethan or too far in the future—something Thomas must have known about me, but also something he probably preferred to ignore to keep the mirage alive.

Thomas had taken me to some of the most exclusive wineries in Napa. We stopped at Elyse, a low-key boutique winery just off the beaten path, rumored to have been started by the Counting Crows, which interested me more than the wine itself. After our tasting, he asked the sommelier for a bottle of their rosé and two glasses. He guided me out under the wisteria and over to the vineyards, where a wine barrel sat underneath twinkling lights that were strung in between the rows. It was beautiful and romantic, but when I said yes to his proposal, I felt nothing but hesitation inside. I got pregnant with Rose on that trip, even though I had only been on fertility treatments for a month. Thomas insisted I start treatments shortly after we knew marriage was in our future. We didn’t anticipate me getting pregnant before we were married, but none of the plans I created worked out the way I wanted.

Once we found out we were having a girl, Thomas insisted on naming her Rose. I didn’t oppose it. I felt a burst of gratitude for both of my children. There was a time when I was told I wouldn’t be able to have any, but Thomas’s connections to new treatments gave me the two most important people in my life, outside my mother and sister. Lucas’s conception, just over a year after Rose’s birthday, took no time at all.

Rose was ready for school when I checked on her. Lucas was a totally different story. He sat playing with his trucks in the middle of his bedroom, still wearing the NSP costume.

Lucas, we need to get ready for school.

But Penny’s not here. I don’t get ready without her. He whined.

I know, love. But today, you will. She’s on her way to take you to school. I didn’t have many moments with them in the mornings since returning to work full time. I had a pretty cush schedule at the hospital, but it required me to leave early and miss mornings with the children. Let’s get you out of the costume and into your uniform.

No! I want to wear this to school today. He backed into the corner of the room, away from my grasp.

Rose appeared and waited behind me while I continued my corralling. Lucas, you can wear it when you come home. Now that you’re in big boy school, you need to follow the rules. And your school says you must wear a uniform.

I hate those rules!

Lucas, remember you get to wear your costume later this week for Nation Day? If you wear it today, it will get dirty, and you won’t be able to show everyone how cool it is. Rose’s voice of reason, even at her age, reminded me so much of Thomas. She played the older sister role well, much like Jessica did when we were growing up. Over the years, with Jessica’s illness, however, our roles changed, and I became the one reminding her of moments of reason.

Sister’s right, Lucas. If you wear that today, you won’t be able to wear it on Nation Day. Penny won’t have time to do the laundry. I looked at Rose. Her eyes illuminated her next move if Lucas wasn’t convinced.

Lucas scrunched his nose and fidgeted with the zipper on his NSP breast pocket. He quietly walked to his closet, not looking at Rose or me. He pulled his school clothes off the shelf and then said, I will wear my uniform today.

I smiled. I think that’s a great idea, buddy.

Mom, I need a lab coat, Rose said as she watched her little brother struggle to put his clothes on.

What career are you going to select?

A scientist, like Daddy.

That’s a great choice, Rose. I’ll order one today. Most girls Rose’s age could select any career they wanted, even if it was out of reach. It wasn’t until they got older that they were funneled into more specific Nation careers that allowed for them to be educated but left room for them to have the most important career above all: motherhood.

Lucas was almost ready when Penny arrived. Her hurried presence created a whirlwind frenzy that fueled my anxiety. Completely unaware of the calm that she sucked out of the room when she walked in, Hey, kiddos! Sorry I’m late. Let’s get all your stuff together and head to school.

Can we stop for donuts, Pen? Lucas ran to her and grabbed her hand.

Not today, buddy. But sometime this week for sure. Penny tousled his hair and grabbed his bag with her free hand. Rose, did you tell mom about the lab coat?

Yes, she did. I’ll order one today.

I can get it when I’m running errands this afternoon.

That sounds great, Pen. Thank you.

It bothered me sometimes how Penny was a second mother to my children. I relished in my role as a mother—they completed me in ways that Thomas or my family could never do. We needed the help, though, and if I were to return to work full time for the hospital, we needed someone. Penny had signed a five-year contract with us—unheard of with someone like her. She had two other offers from higher-tier families when she decided to work with us. Thomas and I were both surprised, but she told us, There’s just something special about your family. I can feel it.

I kissed Rose and Lucas goodbye and watched them walk down the sidewalk to Penny’s car. I knew our time together was finite. In a moment like this, I questioned myself and wondered if the choice I was making today was more selfish than loyal.

Chapter 2

When everyone was gone, I took a quick shower. I put on a fitted cream dress Thomas had bought me a week earlier. I selected beach waves on the insta-drier for my long golden-brown hair so that I could be presentable for my appointment. Thomas preferred the beach waves look. It was easy to be formal or casual, which is what I liked. I put my makeup on, grabbed my high heels and bag, and walked into the living room.

I had a little bit of time before I needed to leave for my appointment. My eyes darted around the living room. Even though we had small children, Thomas insisted on only the best furniture. He said it was important when we entertain, for people to be reminded of our tier and that our home is an example of our tier.

The leather chesterfield couches, crystal lamps, and custom built-in cabinetry felt out of place against the array of toys, children’s books, and stuffed animals on the floor. The built-ins held some of his favorite books: The Art of War, A Collection of Shakespeare’s Tragedies, Death of a Salesman. When I set Harry Potter, We Should All Be Feminists, and Dancer from the Dance on the shelf next to them, Thomas told me they needed to go in the closed cabinet—he only wanted esteemed books on display, not sentimental ones. Feeling scolded like a child, I placed them next to his tattered copy of The Tales of Beatrix Potter. The only token from a father he had never met. The first time Thomas told me about his birth, he also had to tell me about his father’s death. September 11, 2001. I didn’t ask much about his past; the scars on his body and his tensed jaw conveyed to me the topic was off-limits.

Below his books were custom frames full of pictures chronicling the last ten years of our life. Rose’s birth, Lucas’s birth, their first birthday parties, a picture of my mother, sister, and me with a round belly from my wedding—Jessica’s hair was just growing back after a tough round of chemotherapy paid for by Thomas. A sepia tone photo of my father sitting on the porch looking out at the Elysium pond. An image of Thomas and me on a dock in the Maldives. A black-and-white photo of Thomas kissing me on the forehead, both our eyes closed, in front of the Capitol building