The Knot: The Journey to Creating a Personal Wedding Ceremony

By Rick Hazelip

The Knot is a book that guides couples in telling their love story and sharing it in a wedding ceremony. We break down all the elements of the ceremony and show you how to weave them together until there is just one story, your story. And every couple has a different story so, no other wedding will sound like yours.

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• Language: English
• Publisher: Rick Hazelip
• Release date: Jan 5, 2023
• ISBN: 9798987045916

Rick Hazelip

Rick Hazelip has been in ministry and performed wedding ceremonies for over 35 years. He has been the Sr. Pastor of First City Church in Pensacola, Florida, since 2007. In 2021, he began to transition into a Community Pastor role which allows him to spend more time with community families and his grandchildren.Over his career, he has performed hundreds of wedding ceremonies in numerous states and a few different countries. Rick loves weddings and partnering with couples as they share their unique love story with the world. His goal has always been to make each wedding personal to each couple.His passion is to partner with these couples to help them articulate their love journey. Then, share that journey in a wedding ceremony, capture a vision for their successful future, and finally go, make a positive difference in a world that needs more love.Rick has been married to his wife, Suzanne, for over 40 years. They have two children, Jonathan, and Jennifer, one grandchild, and one bundle of joy on the way.

Book preview

The Knot

The Journey to Creating a Personal Wedding Ceremony

Rick Hazelip

Copyright © 2022 by Rick Hazelip

All rights reserved.

No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or author, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.

Contents

Dedication

Foreward

1. Introduction

Part I

A Pastor’s Perspective

2. A Foundation of Love

3. The Wedding and Honeymoon

4. Growing Old Together

PART II

Capturing Our Story

5. How We Met

6. Our Journey Together

7. The Person of My Dreams (Bride)

8. The Person of My Dreams (Groom)

Part III

Personalizing the Ceremony

9. That Wedding Was So…

10. Planning Special Elements

11. The Welcome

12. The Father of the Bride

13. The Intent

14. The Story

15. The One I Love

16. The Vows

17. The Rings

18. Epilogue/Conclusion

Duplicate Worksheets

Acknowledgments

This book is dedicated to:

All those wonderful couples who, for the last 36 years, allowed me to share in their special wedding day.

My wife, Suzanne, who shared her wedding vows with me November 8, 1981. I am so grateful for you. I enjoy this life on earth because of you. You are my resting place.

Jonathan, Nicolle, & Brooks, I am blessed because of you in my life. I love your adventurous spirit and the dedication you both have to your work. Thank you for your unconditional love. You are my joy, and that grandson has stolen my heart.

Jennifer & AJ, we are blessed to live this close to you and watch AJ grow in his first year of life. Jennifer, you are my inspiration to write. The poems you have written since you were young showed me how words can tell a story and move a heart. Thank you!

Foreward

It was 2010, I was in a season of rehabbing my soul and rebuilding my marriage. I did not know if it was going to last and part of me didn’t care. My kids were ten and seven at the time and I was just a ghost in the house. My journey of playing religious games with God were getting old.

I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t know what marriage looked like and I wasn’t certain about the path of being a man. Oh, I knew what the world said what I was supposed to look like and be, but I was stuck somewhere between a Country Boy Can Survive and wearing capri’s. I was all over the place.

I mean, who was I? Why did I exist? What is marriage? What is love? What does a husband, father, or man of God look like? Do I shave my face or do I go cave man? Please don’t tell me I exist to be nice, make money, go to church, go to ball games, and have a nice-looking Christmas card. There has to be more.

Then I met Rick Hazelip. Walked into his office during a season of questioning marriage, religion, life, and purpose. He just smiled and laughed. The words, you aren’t alone rang loud and true. A real man walking in a real world with real junk in his life, serving a real God said, let’s just journey together and take it a day at a time.

He began to share similar pains of religious tradition, mistakes in marriage, and joys and failures of raising kids. We connected immediately. In spite being an Alabama fan and left-handed, he’s one of the greatest men in my life. He just can’t help it. May the Lord forgive him. Let’s pray.

I have several great friends in my life. Rick Hazelip isn’t one of them. He’s better than a great friend, he’s a top 5 man in my life. The way he honors his bride, loves and pastors people, and promotes the Lord, makes him one of the greats. I have found it crucial in my short 47-year journey to surround myself with men who are for marriage. They promote Gods vision.

A real marriage in a real world that chases after the Lord and lives in hope starts way before the wedding day. In this wonderful book, The Knot, Rick displays a beautiful painting of God’s wonderful plan of marriage from Song of Songs. Part of it I had a few Whatchu talkin bout Willis moments and cracked open the Bible to see if God really said what Pastor Rick said He said. And I’m here to tell you, God deeply loves marriage and is for swinging from the chandeliers and making all the monkey noises you desire with your spouse. He’s a fun and romantic God.

Let’s just get real. Some weddings are downright painful. Most of the time it is the Preachers/Officiants fault. I’ve been to some snoozers and four minutes in I’m wondering, where can I find a sandwich?

I’m so grateful for this book and for someone stepping up to bring passion and joy back to the wedding day. A simple step-by-step process to have an unforgettable wedding experience.

Jason Jenkins, President and Co-Founder, Aim Farther, Inc

Introduction

Congratulations! You have found the love of your life and now find yourself in the middle of a real love story. Stories like this are meant to be shared with the world. This is where your wedding comes in because that is the place you publicly declare your love and celebrate with your friends and family.

Weddings are meant to be one of the best days of your life. We put major effort into every detail of the day and yet most couples miss one of the best opportunities of the day when they give little to no thought into the wording of the ceremony itself. We leave it up to the officiant assuming we have no say in what is shared.

That is not true! You are in charge, and you can share your love story. Most officiants just do what they have always done in wedding ceremonies. They pull their one wedding ceremony out of the file and just change the names. How boring. How plain. How uncreative and impersonal. However, we can change all that right now.

Where were you when love found you? Did it come out of nowhere and surprise you? Did love move quickly or develop slowly over many shared moments? Was it romantic? Adventurous? Enthusiastic? Was it quiet? Tender? Spiritual? Does your love story have a soundtrack? A defining moment? A life-changing decision?

It is crazy how love works, isn’t it? When I was in the sixth grade, I walked into our house on November 8, 1972, to my older sister’s birthday party with five of her friends. It was the first time I saw Suzanne Hamm. There is no way I can describe what I felt, but after a quick game of hide-n-seek, I told my mom, One day I am going to marry that girl. Nine years later to the day, November 8, 1981, we married. We still have a friendship so deep that to this day, it even amazes us. I am not saying our love is perfect or was not without major hurdles, but in the end, LOVE WINS!

I love telling our story! Do you love telling yours?

Capture your love story

The purpose of this book is to help you capture your personal love story and share some of that story in your wedding ceremony. A problem with most of the clergy performing these celebrations is that they have only one written set of wedding vows they do over and over, just substituting old names for new ones. Everything is the same. Hardly anything is new, personal, or exciting.

Because no two love stories are the same, why shouldn’t the ceremonies reflect this? I would suggest that it is time for us to stop seeing weddings as a legal requirement before a honeymoon and begin treating each wedding as a unique love story to be shared.

There may be a need to help the one officiating your ceremony, because more than likely, they would have never done this before. It is easy to do and this guidebook will walk you through how to capture your personal story, combining it with the familiar elements of modern-day weddings.

I have performed well over a hundred weddings and no two of them are alike. Each wedding is personalized and tailored to the two individuals getting married.

For instance, when I meet with a couple, here is my opening statement: Two people are walking away from your ceremony and one comments to the other, I loved that wedding. It was so… Give me three words you would want them to say in describing your wedding.

I have heard words like romantic, personal, fun, spiritual, short, unique, intimate. Once we determine the style and feel of the ceremony, we capture it with words and stories. Everything is wrapped up in story. People are moved by story. If we can capture that in our dialogue and maybe even a soundtrack, the audience will not forget your wedding.

Now, as you may know, this takes planning and is developed over time. It is never too early to begin this process. It is as easy as taking a couple of hours or as long as several months of information-gathering and planning. I have found that most couples take their time and spend about a month formulating just the right words, capturing the best memories. I have also learned that most brides want the ceremony plans finished at least a month before the wedding so they can focus on other important details.

I want your wedding day to be special! Like you, we want people coming up to you after it is all over and saying, That was the best wedding ceremony I have ever attended!

This book has three sections:

Part I: I want to share with you a pastor’s perspective on marriage and what I have found to be important truths that set a foundation for a healthy and successful life together. Please do not skip this section. I have been a part of many weddings and have learned a few things I believe are essential for lasting relationships.

I will be sharing some of those insights through a Bible story called, Song of Songs (rated MA). This book is so intimate you might not believe it is in the Bible. However, it gives great advice to couples getting married and helpful insights into the meaning behind a few wedding traditions.

Right now might also be a good time to encourage you to get marriage counseling...the earlier the better. It will open your eyes to the six biggest challenges couples face when getting married and how to tackle those challenges together instead of allowing them to drive you apart. A successful marriage happens when you are being intentional and committed in a few big areas, and then dealing with life as it comes. These insights will reassure you and help to give your marriage a great and healthy start.

Part II: We will capture your love story and