Does God Really Have Your Back?

By Sonia D. Evans

People often use this phrase "God has your back" almost as a rhetoric. So much so that it sounds like the "I love you" at the end of every phone conversation and the "God bless you" when someone sneezes. It seems nice, but when the rubber meets the road, do we really have what it takes in the midst of trials and suffering to say with confidence that God has our back? Are we confident that we can affirm that statement or will we falter?

The writer experiences a sudden challenge toward the end of 2018 and asked herself the same question. It caused the writer to reflect on the incredible journey that God brought her through, from being Catholic to a born-again Christian.

From the dusty roads of India to the cobbled streets of Britain and on to America, where God made her dreams come true, she recounts the challenges and the faithfulness of God that affirmed to her that he had her back always.

The writer relives how she came to the USA as a single person with no family and no driver's license. Having made it as a nurse and recently as a nurse practitioner, she finds herself at the brink of yet another setback which she would like to think was a setup by the God who really had her back.

She invites you to go on the journey with her and to take courage and strength as you walk the road of faith into the unknown abyss where your faith will be tested and while your answers are still invisible. The writer gives you steps to use in the faith walk even as she practices them and goes through the challenge of waiting on God for the answer to the problem.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Jan 15, 2022
• ISBN: 9781098015305

Book preview

cover.jpgtitle

ISBN 978-1-0980-1529-9 (paperback)

ISBN 978-1-68570-803-0 (hardcover)

ISBN 978-1-0980-1530-5 (digital)

Copyright © 2021 by Sonia D. Evans

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

The names of all characters mentioned in this book except for close acquaintances and well-known pastors, have been changed to maintain anonymity.

Printed in the United States of America

This book is dedicated to my dear husband, Brian; my daughter, Jessica; my mom, Salome; my brother, Calvin; my sister, Shireen; and to my dad, Trevor, who is not with us anymore.

Acknowledgments

I would like to acknowledge and thank the Christian preachers whose teachings have inspired me, and the Daily Streams that continue to encourage me on a daily basis.

My appreciation to the Christian artists whose songs have uplifted me and enabled me to continue in my faith walk. To the pastors at our church, family, and friends whose friendship and love mean so much.

Foreword

Does God Really Have Your Back?

Sonia Evans captures her life as it unfolded on three continents. Her journey from India to England to the USA is filled with God’s miraculous expressions of protection, mercy, and grace. I highly recommend Does God Really Have Your Back? to anyone who wonders if God is really there when life gets tough.

This took a lot of courage. I admire you for that. It will be a blessing to all who read it.

Bless you, Sonia.

Joey Ellis

LEAD PASTOR

Stone Edge Church // Macon, GA

stoneedgechurch.com

478.474.9043

Introduction

We have often asked the question, Why God? and Why me? and Why now? It is a poignant question that reverberates in one’s soul. We look at the tragedies and setbacks in our lives, and we are aghast and appalled. We inevitably are prompted to ask the divine Lord those questions. If we were the master planner and were all sovereign, this would undeniably be a different story. If the paintbrush was in our hands, we would paint a completely different painting. This season would not portray a storm with surging waves, sultry skies, and immense dark clouds. Oh, no! Most certainly, none of that! It would have to be a beautiful summers day—bright with sunshine, exquisite birds, gorgeous flowers, and a sweet fragrance in the air. C. H. Spurgeon wrote, O Lord, the clouds are the dust of thy feet! How near Thou art in the cloudy and dark day! Love beholds Thee, and is glad. Faith sees the clouds emptying themselves and making the little hills rejoice on every side.

I had encountered such a season in the fall of 2018. I found myself on a road where the door had suddenly closed, and the rug had been suddenly jerked from under my feet. During those days, weeks, and months—when the unknown stretched out before me—I turned to the only one who had never failed me. I knew that he had a plan and purpose for my life. He saw every injustice, and he knew my heart. He was my closest friend and savior, and he was right there with me. Does God Really Have Your Back? was birthed during those months.

I had absolutely no idea, or the faintest clue, that as the clock ticked, we would find ourselves in the most bizarre and calamitous pandemic of the COVID-19 virus in 2020. One of the greatest impacts besides the devastation of the loss of lives was the immense loss of jobs, with thousands of people in America and around the world suddenly finding themselves without work just like that, like a thief in the night. So much has been stolen, and so much lost! It’s heartbreaking, gut-wrenching, and earth-shattering. The loss of livelihoods, incredible despair, and descent into depression skyrocketed. I realized that what I went through in 2018 and my journey through that minefield was, in essence, a roadmap to navigate safely out of the ordeal. It made sense to me now that what I had gone through could be a blessing to someone else today. The reasons, or the causal effect, might be different; however, we all arrived at one such closed door. I would not be able to understand what losing a job for no rhyme or reason meant, or what it would feel like to walk in those shoes had I not worn them for a period of time. In Does God Really Have Your Back?, I talk about my journey across the seas and how I put my faith in God, and what I did during those tough months as I went through each day until the light shone at the end of the tunnel. I pray that this book would encourage you on your journey to victory as I wrote a major part of it during my ordeal. Do not give up, and do not lose hope. The God who really has your back is on your side, and he sees you right where you are.

Part One

: India

India

1

The Early Years

Whether you know him or not, he exists, and many of us encounter this God, the one true Messiah at some point in our lives. This book describes and narrates how I came to personally know him and how the impossible became a reality in my life. I have traveled a long road and have crossed two continents to get to America. Along the way, I have faced many challenges and hardships. There is no way that I could have made it across two continents as a single girl had it not been for the faithful Father God by my side. As I continue to walk the road before me, I am ever so thankful to know that I am not alone and that he walks with me every step of the way. This gives me the courage to go forward in the hope that no matter what might come across my path, God will see me through. And the only way I can say that with certainty is because he has proved time again to be faithful, despite my unfaithfulness.

So let me tell you a little bit about growing up in Chennai, India, and what it was like. I was born in Chennai, formerly known as Madras, which is one of the four major cities in India. It was not long before I realized that we were a little different from most of the people around us in the manner in which we dressed and the fact that we spoke English all the time at home. My parents informed me that we were Anglo-Indians. You see, the British started to trade with India all the way back from the 1750s (Marshall 2011)¹ and were a very strong presence by the 1800s and in due course, interracial marriages occurred. Anglo-Indian people married other Anglo Indians, and the culture was preserved That was very interesting to me, and I wished that my grandmother could have remembered more as I would have loved to trace the family line. The French also occupied India in the 1600s with the French East India Company until French territory was formally transferred back to India around 1962 (Wikipedia). Vasco da Gama discovered the sea route to India in 1499 and with that, the Portuguese brought Catholicism and evangelization to India. Then there was the French who made their way to India, too (Wikipedia). Overall, India is a country teeming with history and a rich heritage.

My earliest recollections were living in a cozy little home on Foxen Street. It had a nice little garden with lots of shrubs interspersed with beautiful flowers. I was warned not to cut any flowers. I was the only child to begin with, and my mom would take me to my Nana’s home, which was a few streets away, and leave me there until she returned from work. The streets were dusty and paved in the middle. It seemed like a busy place with lots of hustle and bustle. Lots of cyclists, motorists, and a few cars. I remember a makeshift little shop at the end of the street. It was very small, but the man sold a kind of toffee that was quite sweet and sticky. It was made with jaggery and rolled in cellophane paper, and I loved the taste of it. Nana (my mother’s mom was called Blossom). My aunts and nana lived on the second floor, and the owners lived on the ground floor. After mom dropped me off, I would stand outside on the terrace and watch her walk down the unpaved road, go across a dry swamp like area, and go through a gap in a fence that was made with metal railings; that brought her close to the road where she could walk down and get a bus to take her to her place of work. Oftentimes, I would cry as I watched my mom leave and had to be consoled. I was too young for school at that time. I spent most of my days, which were happy times with Nana and mom’s two younger sisters, Sandra and Arlene. They used to read story books to me, which was a favorite treat of mine, and I absolutely loved listening to a story. I usually said again after they read it the first time, and they would humor me by reading it for a second time, but that was my limit. I soon developed a deep desire and passion for reading. I remember thinking that I could not wait to learn to read because then, I would not need to trouble anyone to read to me as I would be able to read a book by myself and then read it all over again. The joys of reading, the untold possibilities of fantasies all held between the covers of a book seemed limitless to my little mind and I longed for it.

Nana was always nice to me and sometimes put something on my plate before the others could get it for supper. She was always busy bustling around the kitchen. I was her only grandchild. Strangely, I have no recollections of my grandfather during this time, but I remember him later on as I grew up. Nana soon became gravely ill and succumbed to buccal cancer. I have vague memories of leaving the house to go to her funeral. I think it was raining; there were umbrellas and the perfume of oleanders as we walked down Foxen street. I missed Nana, but I am glad that I got to know her and spend some time with her because none of my other siblings got to meet her. As a young girl, I was mostly well behaved and got into trouble rarely. Once when I visited their downstairs neighbors, I got my arm stuck between the door and the door post. I had to stay put until the door was taken off its hinges to release my arm in order to get my hand out. Other than that, I think I behaved quite nicely. My dad was quite strict in his upbringing, and good behavior was high on his list along with obedience, so I quickly toed the line.

My dad was a thin, tall, good-looking man who had curly hair, a moustache, and wore glasses. My mom was of short stature, light skinned with long silky straight black hair that came down to her waist. Mom was beautiful. I was thin growing up, and on the short side, stature wise, and my hair was curly and short. After my Nana passed away, I think I spent more time going to grandma’s house, which was quite close to where we lived. Grandma Dee was dad’s mom. She was a schoolteacher and had retired by the time I started first grade. I enjoyed going to grandma’s house as I got to meet two of my cousins and other uncles and aunts. About six years later, my brother Calvin was born.

We were raised Catholic and though my parents did not attend church often, they ensured that my brother and I went to church on a regular basis. I also attended a presentation convent school in town, which was an excellent high school. I do not remember much about God or having nightly prayers or anything of the sort. I began to learn about God and Jesus particularly when we were being prepared for first Holy Communion. The most significant of all was that I was told to ask Jesus to enter into my heart. I did, and I believe that he did come into my heart because from then on, I sensed that he would respond to me, and when I prayed a prayer, it would get answered. I did not give it too much thought, as I mostly prayed for help with my exams. I continued being Catholic and joined the youth choir and went to Sunday school and attended the summer fests that took place during our summer holidays. Summer fests ended each day with some play time and benediction, the latter taking part in church. At the end of the summer fests, there was a picnic, and all of the students would go on a bus and travel to the beach or the zoo and have a splendid time. Mom would always make me egg sandwiches, fill my bottle up with fresh lemonade, and also give me a few other goodies to take along. Then came the last day of summer fest when we would put on a nice program for our parents to show case our talents in drama, singing and dancing. At the end of the program, students were commended for doing well in the summer fest and were given awards.

We were a middle-class family, and special treats came once a month for about a few years. But soon, treats became too expensive; just like birthday parties. I think I was about six or seven when my dad let me know that it was not going to be possible to have any more birthday parties as it was too expensive. I did however get to go to some of my friend’s birthday parties. I have to say that my mom and dad both worked hard to pay the bills. We always had good Indian food, which was quite tasty and flavorful and though we never could afford Basmati rice, we did have other quality rice that was more affordable. Soundari came to work for us shortly after my brother was born as our housekeeper. She was an excellent cook, spoke English, and soon became part of our family. We gave gifts to each other at Christmastime and birthdays. She watched over us while mom and dad went to work. She stayed with us until we were all grown and until she became ill and passed away. She was a born-again Christian who told us that she was praying for us daily. I did not know much about born-again Christians except that they did not pray to Mary or recited the rosary. My grandmother was big on the rosary, and I remember that she often said one or more for me for good results on my exams, for good health, and so forth.

My mom worked hard for a travel agency, and my father worked hard as well for a company that made batteries. He did shift work and worked overtime now and again, which meant that when he did, we knew that we would not see him again until the next day. We never did get to go on holidays, travel the country, or get presents under the Christmas tree. There was never a tree really, but we did put up some decorations. I loved those times when we got together as a family. We ate together, the cousins played games, and there was singing, dancing, and lots of laughs.

We did not have a television or a refrigerator initially. That means for entertainment we played outdoors with our friends, and we had lots of fun. I remember my cousin using a magnifying glass to get the sun’s rays to light a fire. We played hide and seek, tried to cook, and those who could ride bicycles rode their bikes. Occasionally, we played cricket. I seemed to be the only girl cousin around, and they allowed me on their teams sometimes. I loved to read and by first grade, I was well into the Famous Five series by Enid Blyton.

I was close to my mom and often wanted to be by her side. I was close to my dad as well. He spent time with me, and I remember him combing my hair and always doing a fringe, which I disliked immensely. Dad was the one who took me to the doctor. He took me to his friend, Eric’s, home when I was taking part as Cinderella for a fancy-dress competition, and Uncle Eric put glitter on my fancy glass slipper and made my dress look beautiful. I think I won the third prize. Another time, he got Uncle Eric to help me with a school project. Dad had a bicycle, and he went everywhere on it. There was a small seat on the front of the bicycle on which I could sit. I loved going to the market with my dad. It was most interesting, and I enjoyed seeing the rich and vibrant display of fruit, vegetables, greens, and spices of all colors, shapes, sizes, and smells. The market was a hub of activity with lots of people shopping, and vendors calling out to you to come and buy their produce. Dad would park his bicycle before we entered the market, and we would take our empty bags in to do our shopping and return with it full. The air was filled with numerous odors depending on the section of the market that you were walking through. When you got into the first section of the market, you noticed the very first vendor who was seated on a raised platform with fresh coriander spread out in front and some curry leaf. As you went a little further, the smell of seafood assailed your nostrils. As Chennai was on the seacoast, the seafood produce was always fresh and kept on ice. There was a variety of fish, shrimp and crabs, and as we went further along, we came upon the butcher section. I usually held my breath as we walked through the organ meat section. You had to have a strong stomach to go through that section. But it was a great experience as everything was fresh. I still vividly remember those places, the fish market, the vegetables, and the fruit market. Every time I went with my dad, I was certain that we