Voices Lost, Spirit Found: The Journey of Finding Your Voice

By Colee Q. Bethany

One of my mother's favorite lines is "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." The principle still rings true, but there's a difference between being nice and being taken advantage of. We sometimes find it difficult to say no. Whatever the reason we can't say no, I'm here to tell us that we can. We can change our situations if we determine that we are ready to. If you are ready for change, I hope that you will engross yourself on this journey of finding your voice.This workbook is meant for anyone who feels beaten down by life. Jesus knows all about you. He is calling you to draw closer to Him and receive His Spirit. He will fill you with a boldness that you have never known (Ephesians 1:18). He already gave you the strength to go through this process (Isaiah 41:10). You are never alone. God is everything you need.During this process, God will reveal things to us that we couldn't see before. We all have mountaintop and valley experiences. He promises to be with us through them all. This workbook will also help us to understand the people around us but use this workbook to understand you first. We need to be able to heal in order to help others.Voices Lost, Spirit Found takes you through a journey of discovering some reasons for repressed emotions. Revealing some unhealthy coping mechanisms is the next step. The final step is to give some healthy coping mechanisms to replace the unhealthy ones. I know you don't like where you are because you're looking for answers. I pray you find the answers through this workbook and prayer. This workbook gives you food for thought and space for your own thoughts and prayers.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Mar 16, 2021
• ISBN: 9781098049225

Colee Q. Bethany

***no ATA as per author's request***

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Voices Lost, Spirit Found

The Journey of Finding Your Voice

Colee Q. Bethany

Copyright © 2020 by Colee Q. Bethany

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.

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Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Holy Bible, New International Version, Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, Copyright 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Weakness Becomes Strength

Survival Mode

Building Resilience through Rejection

Introduction: Voices Lost

Voices Lost

As children, we are told to be nice and be humble. One of my mother’s favorite lines is if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. The principle that we grew up with still rings true, but there is a difference between being nice and being taken advantage of. People will test us to see how far or how much they can get from us. We sometimes find it difficult to say no.

Saying no makes us uncomfortable. We are natural-born helpers. We might be afraid of what will happen if we say no. Whatever the reason we can’t say no, I’m here to tell all of us that we can. We can say no. We can change our situations. We can grow. We don’t have to stay where we are. It’s not easy to change. Although we are habitual creatures, it can be done. We just need to determine if we are ready for change. If you are ready for change, I hope that you will fully engross yourself on this journey of finding the courage to speak your truth.

This will not be an easy process. It will take a lot of introspection and learning many hard truths about ourselves. God will reveal many things to us that were sitting right there in front of our faces that we couldn’t see before. Take this workbook seriously and do the hard work. We will find our way out of the shells we have been stuck in. This workbook will also help us to understand the people around us, but use this workbook to understand you first. I know you are a natural-born helper. We need to be able to heal in order to help others. I know you don’t like where you are because you are looking for answers. I pray you find the answers through this workbook and through talking with God. Oftentimes, we don’t know what to pray for to get what we need. I hope this workbook gives you guidance on what to ask for. I left space for you to write down your own prayers and thoughts after each section. Sometimes we don’t know what we need or what is stopping us from moving forward. I hope this workbook reveals the reasons to you.

As a young woman in my twenties, I struggled with low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety. I struggled to fit in, not knowing I was never meant to. I was destined to fit out. I struggled with my body image. I always had a little extra weight since I was a child. I stayed at 125 pounds from fourth grade until college. I battled suicidal thoughts and almost committed suicide. Thank God, He intervened right before I did so. I didn’t know at that moment that God had a purpose for my life. He had plans for me that I needed to fulfill.

In my marriage, I was still struggling with anxiety, the feeling of not being good enough and not being heard. That was the loneliest time in my life. Trying my best every day and still feeling like it was never enough. There was always more I could have done or done better. It was in this time that I lost whatever voice I thought I had. When you feel like you’re not being heard, you learn not to speak. I kept everything bottled up until the day I imploded. I knew I had enough. This was the first step of me finding my voice again. As I said before, it is not an easy journey. You will have pitfalls, and you will stumble, but it is well worth it. When you find your voice, you will find that you have so much to say that will bless you and others. I will be continuously praying for you on this journey. It is well worth the fight!

Chapter 1

Repressed Emotions: Why Do We Repress Our Emotions?

Definition of Repressed Emotions

Repressed emotions are conscious experiences of any time our feelings are not expressed. This can happen in a variety of situations and people. People who are shy can be too scared to say how they feel. People who are angry may not say the things they really want to say because they are so busy saying every mean thing that comes to their mind. People who have been abused have learned that their feelings don’t matter, so they don’t speak up. Private people don’t want people to know their business, so they don’t open up to anyone.

Repressed emotions, whatever the reason, wreak havoc on us. No matter how we try to hold onto them, they come out one way or another. They can be displayed in a range of other emotions or mental ailments like anger, depression, anxiety, or addiction. Repressed emotions can come out through stress, which leads to inflammation in the body. Inflammation in our bodies can lead to a host of physical issues like cardiovascular disease or diabetes.¹, ² Inflammation can attack any and every part of our bodies.

In Jeremiah 20:7–18, Jeremiah tried his best to repress all of his emotions and everything that God gave him to say. Being a prophet, he was sent to tell Judah to turn back to God. He was rejected by many. His friends even turned their backs on him. He contemplated keeping it all inside. He was willing to suppress all the hurt and betrayal he felt. He was willing to muzzle the fire of God’s words burning within him. He stated in verse 9, I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot (NIV). Holding it all in was wearing him out. He cried out to God to release it all.

Dear Lord, You created us with a range of emotions. You also created us with outlets to release them. Help us to identify what we have repressed and why. Help us to search our hearts so that we can understand what our responsibility is in dealing with these repressed emotions. Help us to revere You for this is the beginning of wisdom (Proverbs 9:10). In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen.

Questions

What experiences have you had that have caused you to repress your feelings?

What was your responsibility in repressing your emotions?

Do you feel stressed-out or unable to bear your current situation? If so, what would be the ideal cure for your situation?

Name three steps you can take toward your ideal cure.

Outlook on Life

If we have a woe is me mentality, then every time something goes wrong, it will seem like the end of the world. Nothing goes right for me. Here comes trouble again. "I’m