Recovering the Self: A Journal of Hope and Healing (Vol. VII, No. 1)

By Ernest Dempsey and Bernie Siegel

Recovering the Self: A Journal of Hope and Healing (Vol. VII, No. 1) March 2022
Recovering The Self is a quarterly journal which explores the themes of recovery and healing through the lenses of poetry, memoir, opinion, essays, fiction, humor, art, media reviews and psycho-education. Contributors to RTS Journal come from around the globe to deliver unique perspectives you won't find anywhere else!
The theme of Volume VII, Number 1 is "Focus on Work" Inside, we explore physical, spiritual, emotional, and mental aspects of this and several other areas of concern including:

• Working and living in the same space
• Discovering your true calling
• Entrepreneurship and owning a small business
• Sobriety and recovery from alcoholism
• Creating your dream job
• Winning the "lottery of life"
• Overcoming personal shame
• How to cope when your life plan goes awry
• How a service animal can help you
• ...and more!

This issue's contributors include: Ernest Dempsey, Chynna Laird, Leila Ferrari, Adriana Matak, Bethany Anne, Bernie Sigel, Annemarie Brignoni, Ruchira Khanna, Diane Wing, Gerry Ellen, Marjorie McKinnon, Bonnie A. McKeegan, Huey-Min Chuang, Holli Kenley, Katrina Wood, John Justice, Neall Calvert, Patrick Frank, Diane J. Abatemarco, Trisha Faye, Christy Lowry, Carolyn Howard-Johnson, Vincent Hostak, Lev Raphael, Michell Spoden, Jay S. Levy, Edgar Rider, and more
"I highly recommend a subscription to this journal, Recovering the Self, for professionals who are in the counseling profession or who deal with crisis situations. Readers involved with the healing process will also really enjoy this journal and feel inspired to continue on. The topics covered in the first journal alone, will motivate you to continue reading books on the subject matter presented. Guaranteed." --Paige Lovitt for Reader Views

• Language: English
• Publisher: Loving Healing Press
• Release date: Mar 1, 2022
• ISBN: 9781615996759

Book preview

… from the Editor’s Desk Ernest Dempsey

Hi folks, we are back!

Two years of a worldwide crisis called The Pandemic and endless distractions, both before and after, made putting this issue together a challenge. But here we are, at last. Welcome to the long-awaited Issue 17 of Recovering the Self.

This issue, themed Work/Profession, is special because of two main reasons. First, it came as an uphill battle to hold onto it and not let go. It was like the battle that brought the journal face to face with its possible demise. Confession: I thought of calling it quits as a number of times the voice of defeat in me screamed: Admit it. It’s over. You just can’t do it. But the warrior in me, wounded and exhausted, kept shaking his head and reminding himself, You aren’t letting it die. Get up and deliver! So these lines you are reading come from the warrior that is back on his feet, still hurting but definitely over the threshold of defeat. Perhaps, we should call this our Resurrection issue.

Secondly, we are going digital at least with this issue. Given the ages that passed in putting this together, there is no more time to spare on the printing process. It’s going to be our first entirely digital issue, published as an e-book. Whether we’ll return to print mode for future issues is undecided yet. So I’d love to hear from you whether you prefer digital or print format for future issues. Kindly share your take via the email included below.

Like previous issues, the entries in this issue are mainly themed, i.e. about workplace or profession, whether strictly or loosely. We do not have reviews of books and movies from a single reviewer as our past reviewer moved on. That means if you, or someone you know, would like to become a reviewer for us, feel free to send me an email. We’re announcing the theme for the next issue at the end of this (see the page Write For Us toward the end of the issue).

My best hope is we see better days ahead and life returns to normal. And of course, best hope for the next issue to be on track and in time. I sincerely hope the worst is over and the best lies ahead. Thank you everyone for your patience and faith in RTS.

Peace to all!

In healing spirit,

Ernest Dempsey

[e-mail]

February 24, 2022

An Author At Home: Tips for Working and Living in the Same Space by Chynna Laird

I truly admire working parents and the sacrifices they have to make. It isn’t an easy choice being away from your children for most of the day, and missing them growing up without you there as much as you’d like to be. But in these modern times, working isn’t always a choice; it’s a necessity. I’ve been fortunate enough to find a working niche that enables me to work from home.

My choice not to return to my Paralegal position after the birth of my first child wasn’t an easy one. I had a great job in a wonderful law firm and got along great with my fellow employees. However, when my daughter started showing signs of high needs, when she was a baby, I knew that I had to switch my focus to her needs and change my career goals for her sake.

I’ve always been a writer, but never pursued it as a ‘job’. After getting a few articles out there, winning a few contests and getting paid to do something that not only came naturally to me but also made money, I decided to start my own business.

I own and operate a writing, editing, blogging and authoring business from a small space I claimed in our basement that I call ‘my office’. Now, working from home isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. It takes a lot of hard work, dedication, solid time-management, and impeccable organization. Don’t get me wrong. You need the same sort of skills in a public office. The difference is when you run your own business, especially from home, you are the boss, the administrative assistant, the secretary, the receptionist, the media and promotions person plus you have to complete all the work and assignments. No one to pass things on to in this situation.

The most important aspect is creating and maintaining the balance between work life and home life, especially if you are a stay-at-home parent to boot. I mean my ‘breaks’ consist of doing household chores, running errands, and helping with tasks for my four kids. It’s taken a bit of time, and a lot of adjustments, but they do finally understand that when Mom is working, she needs to concentrate on what she needs done or there’s no groceries to eat.

That balance comes from a very strong base of organization. I am the type of person who needs everything in the right place so I can concentrate on my assignment at hand. Obviously, I get a lot more done when my kids are all in school during the day, but there are times when I need to work in the evenings too. So that organization base is critical for the smooth-running of any business, not just ones like my own.

The specific focuses in establishing that solid organizational base should be creating a proper workspace, scheduling time wisely, not overworking or overextending yourself, make deadlines that are reasonable and that you can meet, keep track of assignments and update regularly, daily prioritization of ‘to-dos’ and having a good file system.

Let’s go over each of these one at a time.

Create a proper workspace. There are no set rules here. If you are fortunate enough to have an extra room that you can call your own, perfect. For those of us who have to find that space, it really depends on what you need to run your business. For me, I needed enough room for a desk, my computer, bookshelves, and a lot of filing slots. When my kids were small, I used part of the living room so I could be close if they needed me, especially my higher needs kids. Now that they are all bigger, and can mostly fend for themselves, I blocked off a part of the basement with a cheap wall unit put on its side. In my space are my computer, a printer, two bookshelves, and a shredder. My desk already has file slots all around it and my CPU, shredder, and printer are hidden under it. The wall unit has cubbies in it that I can use for copies of my books, my assignment accordion files cases, printer paper, and other supplies. The key is to use every tiny inch of your space in the best way you can.

Schedule your time wisely. This is particularly important for those of us working from home. As I said earlier, I do other chores/ tasks on my ‘breaks’, not during my writing time. Essentially, you want to make sure you plan out your day and how much time you have to dedicate to each task or assignment. For example, I get up very early (usually around 4:30 a.m.). The first thing I do is check and return emails, make sure my blog post went live and check my job chart. After that, I divide what time is left among editing, adding to a book in progress, writing an article, or conducting research. I have a set time to spend with my children from suppertime to tuck-in time. I may work a few hours after that until my own bed time but, generally, as long as I get all my deadlines completed, my day is done shortly after tuck-in time.

Don’t overwork or overextend yourself. This simply means knowing yourself and what you can accomplish successfully in the period of time you have without wearing yourself thin. Taking on too much work just to make extra money can affect the work you generate and that will cost you future opportunities. There’s an old saying that goes, Don’t bite off more than you can chew. And this is so true. Realistically take on assignments you know you can complete, and complete to the best of your ability.

Make reasonable deadlines. This is sort of an extension of the above point. When discussing an assignment with a potential client, be sure to ask about pertinent information such as how much work is involved, whether additional research is required and whether or not it is a time-sensitive job. I discovered from working with lawyers years ago that what one person considers an emergency, number one priority, another would consider it something that can wait a bit. The key here is understanding your workload, the amount of time you can dedicate to a specific job, and how long, from your perspective, you feel you’ll need to complete it. Once information from both sides is taken into account, a mutual deadline can be set based on what is best for everyone involved. But being sure you can do a job around the other projects you may have going on is a major factor to bear in mind before even setting up a slotted deadline. Nothing turns clients off more, or costs future business, than if a deadline is late. A final note to make here is if you ever needed a bit of extra time, be honest and in contact with the client. Oftentimes, a requested extension isn’t a big deal if the job gets done.

Keep track of and update assignments. Once you get an assignment, be sure to have some sort of tracking system to monitor jobs, when they’re due, and mark them off as ‘complete’ when they’re done. A bring forward (BF) or tickler system works very well. When you open up your computer, you’ll get reminders of appointments, meetings, and any work that has to be done on that day. Of course, using the old cork board or oversized calendar methods work too, but paper has a tendency to get lost or ruined. This system is also a great way to keep track of ‘To Dos’ and set up reminders for important or priority assignments coming up.

Maintain an impeccable filing system. Yes, the computer is a great filing tool, but all of those loose papers need a home too. Not only does it clear your workspace up a bit, it also puts important paperwork in a safe place. I have the file folders I use most often lined up on the top shelf of my desk behind my monitor. That way, when I need to double check information or research I’ve done, it’s right at my fingertips. My other files go in my wall unit cubbies beside my desk. If you don’t have room for filing, having a file accordion box can work too. It’s very important to have everything where it can be found quickly and easily. That way you don’t waste valuable worktime looking for that one paper with the important information you scribbled down to complete a job that’s due. (As a side note, don’t let an untrained 10-year old ‘help’ you with filing.)

Those are the main points I can share to keep your home-based business up and humming. The most valuable insight I can give, whether you work from home or in an office, is to always keep work life separate from family life. Remember that you are working to help the family, but the family treasures the time you slot in for them too.

About the Author

Chynna Laird is a mother of four, a freelance writer, blogger, editor, and award-winning author. Her passion is helping children and families living with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), mental and/or emotional struggles, and other special needs. She’s authored two children’s books, two memoirs, a Young Adult novella, a Young Adult paranormal/suspense novel series, a New Adult contemporary novel, and an adult suspense/thriller. To learn more about her work, visit her website: www.chynnalairdauthor.ca.

Melissa’s Story – One Step at a Time by Leila Ferrari

Melissa was a competent, friendly business-owner of a highly successful small restaurant on the coast of southern California. At that time, several of her children were still part of the business and she often had repeat customers. These repeat customers included my parents, who even in those difficult years of their lives, always felt welcome and as if they had a place in her restaurant. The following is Melissa’s story in her own words.

~ ~ ~

Back when in Michigan we had five children, a husband who took care of things, he worked, and I stayed home. Things were going along really well; we did all kinds of things.