Dear folks, have you seen Hope?

By Nancy Lois Lockhart

An adventure with Hope as she finds forgiveness and significance - things she lived over 30 years without. As Hope journals her way from the comforts of America to the surprises of China, she shares her day-to-day observations that blossom into a most humble experience of "making a difference" wherever she found herself next. She defined her hope as found in a smile, in a thank you, or even an excuse me. You will discover how you define your HOPE as you read these letters that were never mailed. Having true HOPE is so ginormously valuable.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Aug 16, 2022
• ISBN: 9781387690831

Book preview

Dear Folks, have you seen Hope? N. Lois Lockhart. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author. The author cannot be held responsible for the illicit use of the information provided within this book.

For further information or comments, email the author: [e-mail] or at All write, let’s talk

DEDICATION

In the years I spent in China as a teacher, as a coworker, as a friend, and missionary, my attempt to understand the kind of hope that might survive in a nation without God-fearing faith included a multitude of conversations behind closed doors. As I completed this work, my country and China have moved further and further away from peaceful relations. May my Chinese friends, former students, and former colleagues remain true friends for as long as our hearts have hope.

My hope in authoring this book is to offer you an unsinkable lifeline. My hope is for you to discover the true Hope – the Hope named Jesus - the promise of eternal joy for body, soul, and mind that tells us, In the world you will have hardships, but take courage, for I have overcome the world (John 16:33).

Dear Folks offers unique and engaging impressions of various definitions of hope. I appreciate you taking interest in this book and welcome you to explore my blog site and perhaps you will discover some manner of likeness that will encourage

you to find joy in true Hope....a hope that is everlasting to everlasting!

This book is organized with 96 short-ish letters, each filling a chapter theme. The themed entries are in no certain order, neither by date or by priority.

Nancy Lois, foreign teacher. English Lecture 350+ Chinese students and teachers. largest attendance ever. 2012, GDUPT, Maoming, Guangdong, PRC

HOPE FULLY

Do you remember ever feeling like your life was pointless? Like you were invisible – having no meaning? Completely insignificant? What do you do when these feelings begin to suffocate you? What makes you get up every day knowing you’ll be dealing with these feelings all over again? You’ve most likely had thoughts about ending it all. It would be natural to think this at some point. Humans want importance along with independence. But what happens when independence morphs into isolation?

I spent more than thirty years under the shadow of perceived insignificance. The important word here is perceived. But one thing happened to me that began a journey of truth and forgiveness. Forgiveness is always associated with love . . . and hope. And in 1st Corinthians 13:5 Paul writes that love keeps no record of wrongs.

After my divorce, then after college, I served as a missionary teaching English in China. In my first semester of teaching in a southeastern China university, two male students argued over a girlfriend. Soon after, one of the males jumped off his dormitory balcony to his death.

I began all my classes that week with two questions: Why were you born? and How are you making a difference? "Every individual’s sphere of life is a post assigned him or her by our Creator. All things were made for us, with the purpose that we may know and acknowledge their Author."¹

None of my students realized that they were born for a unique purpose. They told me that they are expected to get an education, get a job, and buy a house, and a car, and have kids. I couldn’t understand how these young students had grown into young adults without knowing their true value in this life. I thought about their future – how did they keep getting up morning after morning without realizing there was a higher purpose for them to do so?

And one word kept flashing in my mind – hope. How did these students define hope? And is their hope enough to keep them going throughout life’s future ups and downs? Is their hope what draws them to get up every day? What are they hoping in? In China, university students are not yet seen as adults. Following university, getting a job and getting married. . . . then they are adults. Maybe they think they don’t need to have hope of their own until they are considered adults by the culture. It puzzles me. You may have struggles with your daily life. You may feel you are insignificant or that you don’t feel good enough to be of any value. That’s because this world only offers a relentless drive for more things – to rise to others’ expectations, yet never being good enough, never working hard enough, never working long

¹Calvin, John. an excerpt of the 2nd edition of his Institutes of the Christian Religion (1539); Chapter 5, The Right Use of the Present Life.; Gospel of John, chapter 1, verses 2-5 [The Word] was in the beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him was not any thing made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the Light of men. The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

enough. Never pleasing the right people. Your hope must be in something that rises above this unforgiving and tormenting world.

I soon realized I needed to know how my students defined real hope and how they acquired it. I created a simple 20 question survey regarding hope. Some questions used a, b, or c, and the others were short answer. I made copies and gave out 500 surveys, either through personal social media or hand delivery, to family, friends, Chinese students, and Chinese colleagues. I received back 486. From their answers, I was able to make a probable summation about a general belief system that includes hope, their kind of hope.

How do I make a difference as a teacher? I’m not sure that I will ever know to what extent I have impacted anyone’s life. But I am certain that my Savior claims that He will make a difference in my heart if I open my hands to receive His path for my life, each step along the way. And this is MY Hope!

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Preface: Hope Fully      x

The Starfish Thrower, poem      227

5

ByWayofIntroductions

I grew up on Sinatra music and to this very day, it is still my favorite genre and I remember most of the lyrics to Broadway show songs.

I was brought up in a loving environment, but I wasn’t like other girls. My thoughts were different and I never knew why. I mostly thought on things of the other worldly, like about God. And I dreamt about music and about being on stage in a musical. I also dreamt about being a professional softball player.

In my later years, I knew that God was tugging on my heart but I didn’t know why. As I grew older, my new understanding of life shed light on my childhood. And suddenly, one wonderous day, my life changed. That was the

² The long play records were LPs; the smaller records were 45s (played at 45 rpm) and had one song on each side. Records, or albums, could be stacked with LPs and when one side is finished, the player would drop the next one on top of the one just finished and that new one would play, etc. The record player was used in slang/vulgar when someone who disliked you would say, Sit on it and rotate.

7

day I met Hope. That was the beginning of knowing who HOPE truly was. Hope was so powerful that I was swallowed up in her awesomeness. But let me finish telling you about my life before I met Hope.

If I came from such a loving homelife, you may be asking yourself how I could feel so without value and without significance?" I experienced several shameful incidents in my teens.³ No one could help me recover from these incidents. Covered up secrets upon secrets. Hurtful events shrouded with despair. I felt somehow I deserved these things to happen to me. I felt I was the necessary scapegoat for my family, even after I was married. Using sarcasm, people would lift me up as an object of ridicule - from my perspective. This distressing attitude of mine kept me from having friends for very long. I found myself moving into a secret, solitary corner overshadowed with hideous darkness, with no hope.

The way out, however, is for the scapegoat to distance oneself from the cruelty. There may be moments of self-doubt, but this will subside as you grow into a true caring person. Narcissists can fool the outside world. They turn on the charm whenever they’re with people so those people will like them.

³ None need to be named. It is enough to know I went through various traumatic times.

8

Eventually, thankfully, those narcissists get found out. ⁴ Oswald Chambers wrote, God will do with me what He is not doing with anyone else. Let Him have His way.⁵

Gratefully and with all humility, I was drawn up, away from the hurt and pain. Drawn up by the hand of my Savior. Only He had the might to reach down into my pit of despair and pierce my heart bringing to it grace and mercy in perfect love and complete forgiveness. Hope came to me. Hope was healing. Hope told me that holding grudges are from our own misdirected pride. Holding grudges are self-inflicted. I knew Hope would release me from my mental prison of secrets and hurt feelings. Hope changed my life!

A BRIEF MESSAGE⁶

FIGHTING HOPELESSNESS

"So many have lost their way to hope. Hopelessness . . . has become epidemic in our culture and in the church. Hopelessness is a sense of despair and dread. Hopelessness is correlated with suicide, depression, self-harm, and belief of being undesirable. Hopelessness has been an unrelenting teacher. . .

The lesson lately is that government, economy, politics, and social awareness will not secure our future. So, how do we get to hope? What does the road to hope look like? Like any journey, it begins with knowing where we are. . .

9

Hopelessness comes when our hope in something is unreliable or incapable of meeting the deepest longings of our lives. The unexpected road to hope begins with the realization that our plans do not work and are not capable of taking the sorrow of this fallen world away. Ironically, hopelessness is the first step to finding real [true] hope.

We will never get to hope if we believe that merely changing circumstances is the answer. Hope is not in the circumstances but in God alone. Hope is not found in small, selfish thinking. The hopeless person does not think too big. Hopelessness can become comfortable for us. We want hope, but we want to be in charge.

I am living in a solitary environment now in my senior years. Because of covid and my inability to drive, I remain at home for nearly 99 percent of the time. My daughter takes care of all my needs with shopping and trivial things, . . . Amazon, as well. At first I found this isolation to be discomforting. However, after four years, though still being homesick for my life in south China, I am quite content. I wonder if my contentment comes from not dealing with people and their troubles. But, no. My contentment comes from my relationship with Christ and I still find excitement and joy when reading the scriptures.

I believe in the sovereignty of God over all things, and He is directing my time to be used for my writing. That’s the one way I am enabled to offer any benefit to others. God enables me to write. He is in charge of getting people to read what I write. And even further, God is the One who opens the hearts of those needing comfort from reading what I write, though I would prefer people to read the Bible.

Bye for now.      Love,      Hope

10

Summation:      Now what?

You can read what I wrote. You can think about what I wrote. You can agree or disagree with what I wrote. You are in a private space so you can have whatever opinion you choose. Don’t panic about the footnotes. Ignore them if you choose. And don’t panic when you notice I use quite a bit of Christian language. You can ignore that too. But I hope not.

What will draw you to keep reading? Hopefully, I’m offering you the same introduction to Hope as I received. Maybe you will emotionally connect with something I’ve written or experienced. But how do I help you in your struggles?

My struggles with insignificance were not isolated . . . but quite normal for many folks. It’s okay to feel this way. BUT. . . it’s not okay to stay this way. My hope for you is more than just you surviving your ordeals. I’m hoping you will keep reading, step back a few feet, and just know that you are not alone.

11

12

Hopeisanameandathing

2:1      DEAR FOLKS,

What would you say are the two greatest sorrows are? After much thought, I believe two of the greatest sorrows in life are feeling that God would not love me, and that God does not participate in my life. These should be the undergirding of our faith: knowing that God loves us completely, forgives us totally, and cares for us perfectly. (Romans 5:8)⁷ In God’s eyes, we each have value because we have been created in His image by His own breath. And yes, this includes those who have physical or mental disease. And yes, it includes the aged as well as the young. We may not be valuable as being cost effective by this world’s ranking; nevertheless, we have true exceptional value because we are God’s creations.⁸

Hope is a H-U-G-E word. If you hope in God, then your perception of hope in God must be suitable enough for you to hope in. If you hope in something or someone else, then that

in my mother’s womb. I praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. . . Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in Your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none."

13

must be sufficient for you to hold on to in crisis. Hope, then, is a HUGE word. But hope