The Exquisite Presence

By Marla J Jarett

An intimate look into the fears, anger, shame, frustrations, victories, and consequences of one woman's journey through Breast Cancer.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Jun 8, 2022
• ISBN: 9781667848846

Book preview

cover.jpg

Contents

A personal note from the author:

Chapter 1 - The Journey Begins

Chapter 2 - CANCER—The Sound of Death

Chapter 3 - Fears and Frustrations

Chapter 4 - Focus

Chapter 5 - Listening

Change My Heart oh God

Chapter 6 - Darkness

Chapter 7 - Questions and Answers

Chapter 8 - Anxiety and Reality

Chapter 9 - Surgery

Chapter 10 - Aftermath

Chapter 11 - Is the storm past?

Chapter 12 - Shame

Conclusion: The Exquisite Presence

Reflections

Acknowledgements

A little bit about me

Scriptures

Songs

A personal note from the author:

It is my fervent prayer and intent that my story brings honor and praise to God. That reflects the intimate love and care He has for us as individuals. Most importantly, my hope is that it directs your thoughts to God and causes you to examine your own heart and relationship with Jesus and to make certain that you have asked Him to be your own personal Savior and Lord. Then, you can rest assured you are going to Heaven. This is not a decision to put off until a more convenient time comes. We do not know the hour nor the day of our death, so waiting till then will be too late.

As the song Blessed Assurance states:

"Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine!

O what a foretaste of glory divine!

Heir of salvation, purchase of God,

born of His Spirit, washed in His Blood.

Perfect submission, all is at rest,

I in my Savior am happy and blest,

Watching and waiting, looking above,

filled with His Goodness, lost in His Love.

This is my story, this is my song,

praising my Savior all the day long."

By Fanny Crosby

God Bless You,

Marla J. Jarett

Thou Shalt Have Words

Thou shalt have words,

But at this cost, That thou must first be burnt…

Burnt by red embers from a sacred fire,

Through all thy being, carrying thee afar,

From old delight,

Not otherwise, and by no lighter touch,

Are fire-words brought.

Poem Thou Shalt Have Words

By Amy Carmichael

The Exquisite Presence

© 2022 Marla J Jarett

All rights reserved. This book or any portion there of may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

Paperback ISBN: 978-1-66784-883-9

eBook ISBN: 978-1-66784-884-6

To all those Warriors

Fighting the Battle

To those who are Survivors

To the Honor of those who fought hard

But lost the earthly Battle.

Ultimately

This is dedicated to the praise, honor, and glory

Of God in fulfillment to the vow I made

To Him if He would heal me.

"I will thank you publicly

Throughout the Land.

I will sing your praises

Among the Nations.

Your kindness and love are as vast

As the Heavens.

Your faithfulness is Higher than the Skies"

Psalms 57:9-10

NLB

Right before the Storm:

A picture containing nature, outdoor, cloud Description automatically generated

Photo by Z’s Photography

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy!

I look to you for protection.

I will hide beneath the shadow of Your Wings

Until the danger passes by.

Psalms 57:1

NLB

Before the Storm

December 20, 1996, started much like every other day, with rays of sun beaming through the windows waking me from a good night’s sleep. I lingered awhile, thinking over the anticipated duties for the day in the best season of the year, Christmas!

I rolled out of the bed and headed for the coffee pot and my Bible; my favorite way to start a day! After my study time, I headed for the shower. Today, however, would not be like every other day. I discovered an unusually large lump in my left breast. Since I had fibrous breast disease, I was accustomed, occasionally, to feeling lumps. The size of this one caught my attention. Immediately, I began to reason that since it was so close to our family Christmas get-together, it could wait until afterward. I would monitor it and if it changed size, then I would make an appointment with my doctor.

The weekend of our family Christmas came but I kept my discovery to myself, so it would not distract us from the celebration or cause any undo concern. However, on the three-hour long drive home, I looked out the window at the stars and moon in the dark sky and a deep sorrow came over me. Fear was beginning to set in! What if this was the last happy family celebration we shared together? What if I did not get to see my grandchildren grow up? What if I did not get to LIVE? Tears rolled silently down my cheeks as grief and fear gripped me.

Chapter 1 -

The Journey Begins

Monday morning, I called my radiologist and made an appointment to have an ultrasound of my left breast, all the time reasoning it was probably nothing. After all, I have had many lumps checked over the years, and even had one aspirated, and all were dismissed as non-threatening.

They found me an appointment in that week and performed the ultrasound. As I had thought, it confirmed the lump to be non-threatening. Then, my radiologist came in and asked if I had had my mammogram this year. Even though I had, he asked that I have another one done right then. I told him no because the last one had come out fine. He was not to be deterred, and I reluctantly went along with his suggestion but was slightly aggravated about it.

The mammogram also confirmed the lump to be non-threatening, but after a thorough inspection, the radiologist discovered some suspicious calcification groupings in my right breast. He asked me into his office and put the film on the screen to