Just Say Thanks: Cultivating Gratitude Deepens Intimacy With God

By R.T. Kendall

ARE YOU ...More likely to criticize than to praise? ...Quicker to complain than to thank? ...Apt to Vent disappointment before expressing thankfulness? If you have to answer yes to these questions, you probably need to learn to be more grateful and appreciative. "GIVE THANKS IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES, FOR THIS IS GOD'S WILL FOR YOU..." This book's life-changing message will enable you to discover: •Why gratitude must be taught •The power of offering a "sacrifice of praise" during times of adversity •Why God's Word instructs us to have a grateful heart •How you have God's undivided attention when you say "thank you" •A greater anointing that comes from giving thanks to God •What you should be most thankful for •Why sanctification is called the "doctrine of gratitude" Get ready to learn why and how to thank God-causing you to receive the blessing that comes from the right attitude.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Charisma House
• Release date: Jul 13, 2005
• ISBN: 9781636410449

R.T. Kendall

R. T. Kendall was the pastor of Westminster Chapel in London, England, for twenty-five years. He was educated at Trevecca Nazarene University (AB), Southern Baptist Theological Seminary (MDiv) and Oxford University (DPhil) and has written a number of books, including Total Forgiveness, Holy Fire, and We've Never Been This Way Before.

Book preview

Foreword

JONATHAN EDWARDS TAUGHT us that the task of every generation is to discover in which direction the Sovereign Redeemer is moving and to move in that direction. As with his previous books, RT has done it again with Just Say Thanks! He has an amazing ability to address vitally important subjects at just the right time. His desire, not only to hear from God, but also to understand the relationship between the Word and the Spirit and then pass these truths on, is a very precious gift to us all. His words are eagerly awaited and are life-changing when taken on board.

In Just Say Thanks!, RT tackles a long-neglected subject but one that is central to our Christian faith—thankfulness toward God and one another. In today’s sophisticated and selfish society we are much more likely to criticize than praise, quicker to complain than to thank, and more ready to vent disappointment before expressing gratitude.

RT writes with disarming honesty, starting from his own sense of failure in this whole area. He confesses he has had to be taught by God to be grateful and follow a daily discipline of thanksgiving because this does not come easily. He teaches us why and how to thank God and, from his pastor’s heart, urges us to be obedient and to receive the blessing that comes from the right attitude.

These words from William Law’s Serious Call to a Devout and Holy Life, written way back in 1729, beautifully summarize the spirit and rationale of RT’s brilliant book.

Would you know him who is the greatest saint in the world? It is not he who prays most or fasts most; it is not he who gives most alms, but it is he who is always thankful to God, who receives everything as an instance of God’s goodness and has a heart always ready to praise God for it.¹

—CELIA BOWRING

Preface

THIS BOOK WAS written in Britain but finished in America. At the time I wrote it, it was hard to grasp that only a few months earlier I sat in the Westminster Chapel vestry writing this book. I recall one day looking around and saying to myself, Am I really here? Have I actually been here for twenty-five years? Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones used to say to me of his thirty years at the Chapel, I can hardly remember being there. I now know exactly what he means.

You will be reading a book by one very grateful man. Nobody is more undeserving than I. When I contemplate that God brought me from the hills of Kentucky to Westminster Chapel, I find it incredible.

As I explain in chapter one, this book was on the inside of me waiting to come out for fifteen years. I only hope I can pass on a greater desire than you have ever had to be thankful. Rob Parsons, who reckoned that Total Forgiveness was the one book of all I have written he would choose, read this manuscript and actually suggested that this book has the potential to be my most important work. As always, he did make several helpful comments, as did my friends Lyndon and Celia Bowring. I thank Celia for her gracious foreword. What would I do without friends like them! I miss these people more than you can fathom.

My thanks also to Beryl Grogan, my former secretary, who has seen this effort through to the press. She has lovingly typed every word. And do I ever miss having a secretary!

People ask me what is it like living in retirement. Strangely enough, it hasn’t been easy for Louise or me. I could almost write a book on that topic! You will read how much our daughter, Melissa, loves London. Nobody loves London more than Louise and I. Sometimes I wonder if we will ever settle in over here in America. But I can certainly affirm how thankful to God we are that we ever lived in England and that I had the distinct honor to be the minister of Westminster Chapel for exactly twenty-five years.

This book is warmly and affectionately dedicated to Alan and Julia Bell. You can read about them in my book In Pursuit of His Glory, which tells a bit of our twenty-five years at Westminster Chapel. They were sent from the Lord to Louise and me in a time of need, and we only want them to know how much they are loved.

—R. T. KENDALL

Introduction

I HAVE TEN thousand stories that could show how thankful I have had occasion to be, so forgive me for choosing something that happened shortly after we retired. On the first day we moved into our new home in Key Largo, Florida, our neighbors called Skip and Diane kindly introduced themselves to Louise and me. Let us know if there is anything we can do for you, they graciously offered. I did appreciate their friendliness but never dreamed of accepting their offer. The best neighbors are those who are cordial but never a nuisance! As poet Robert Frost said, Good fences make good neighbors.

One hour later the Bimini top (the covering that protects from the sun) on my little boat became undone, and the repairers said that I would have to bring it into their shop. This meant several days of waiting without a boat, not to mention the expense. I had noticed that Skip had a toolshed in his garage, and so I approached him. Let me have a look at it, he said. He fixed it in five minutes. I thanked him profusely.

There is no way we can calculate or fathom the depths of our debt to God.

I then stepped into the boat to start the motor, but it wouldn’t start. The same exact trouble I had been having every year on our summer vacations had now reoccurred. The boat mechanic never really got it right. Embarrassed though I was to do so, I walked across the street and told Skip my problem. Let me have a look at it, he said again. He studied the situation in silence for several minutes, then tried one thing. He repaired the motor in thirty seconds with an inexpensive part. I was now feeling a very deep debt of gratitude indeed for my new friend and neighbor and told him so.

But there was more. An hour later, as I was tying the boat to my dock, my only pair of glasses somehow slipped off and fell into eight feet of water. Oh no, I thought, Skip surely can’t help me here. I dare not bother him again. But retrieving my glasses was more crucial than the use of the boat, and I was not accustomed to diving.

I knocked on Skip’s door. What is it this time? he said jokingly. I had to explain what had just happened and why I was turning to him a third time in just over an hour! He got on his swimming shorts, dived into the water, and brought up my glasses on the first dive. I couldn’t believe it, and I was so relieved. And so thankful.

The funny thing is Skip seemed very pleased to be of help. He knew also that I was extremely grateful. But I never, never, never wanted to be so indebted to anyone—and especially to a neighbor I had only just met!

The truth is, I felt so fortunate that God had provided us with a neighbor like that. It was almost too good to be true.

But that is but a drop in the ocean compared to the debt we owe to God. There is no way we can calculate or fathom the depths of our debt to God.

How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

How vast is the sum of them!

Were I to count them,

they would outnumber the grains of sand.

When I awake,

I am still with you.

—PSALM 139:17–18

What God does for us every day—daily bears our burdens (Ps. 68:19)—is a thousand times more than what the best of friends and neighbors do for us.

The question then, is, are we thankful? That is what this book is about—learning gratitude and remembering to thank God for everything: the big things and the little things. God wants to be appreciated. I want this book to help us all to be more and more thankful.

CHAPTER ONE

Making Up for Lost Time

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

—PHILIPPIANS 4:6

MY GRANDMA MCCURLEY—MISS Maddox before she married—was a schoolteacher in Springfield, Illinois. One ten-year-old black boy in her class was always getting into fights with white boys. One day when he was serving detention after school, she began asking him questions as to why he was always getting into trouble. Miss Maddox, those boys pick on me and gang up on me out on the playground, he replied, so when I am back in the classroom I try to get even with them because they can’t gang up on me in the class.

So you’re trying to get even with them, are you? she asked.

Yes, he replied, that is what I want more than anything.

How would you really like to get even with them? she then asked. I believe you are a very intelligent boy, she continued. "You could get top grades if you tried. If you really want to get even, get the best education you can possibly get. You could become somebody important one day, and then you’ll really get even."

God has a way of letting us save face and show gratitude to Him.

Nearly fifty years went by. My grandpa was in business for himself but after having an accident, he was unable to work, and they fell on hard times. They were in danger of losing their home. My grandma got a phone call from the State House one afternoon. The secretary of a state senator asked, Are you the former Lottie Maddox? The senator wants you to attend a special banquet in his honor.

But why? my grandma asked.

The secretary replied that the senator was asked to invite the person who had been most influential in his life to be present at this banquet. That ten-year-old black student had become a lawyer and was now a state senator.

Grandma and Grandpa McCurley attended the banquet and sat in a place of honor. After the senator received his award for high achievement in his state, he asked that the lady he knew as Miss Maddox to stand. The black senator retold the above story to the people present. He said that event changed his life and motivated him to do something with his life. He was so pleased that he could, at last, show gratitude to Miss Maddox.

After the banquet he went to my grandma and said, Let me know if there is anything I can do for you. She asked if he could help her find a job as they were in danger of losing their home. She went to work the next day in an office in the State House and did so until her retirement.

My grandma was almost overwhelmed at the thought of being used in the life of that young black student and also for God’s surprising way of providing for their needs nearly fifty years later. Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out! (Rom. 11:33).

The senator may have taken a while to express his debt of gratitude to his old teacher. But he was determined to make up for lost time. He never forgot Miss Maddox. I too know the feeling of wanting to express long overdue thanks when I feel so totally unworthy. But better late than never! God has a way of letting us save face and show gratitude to Him.

God alone knows how grateful I am to Him, and only He really knows why I should be so thankful. Many a preacher would love to be the minister of Westminster Chapel where I was loved and appreciated for twenty-five years. Although not everything that I wanted to happen during my tenure at Westminster happened, when I consider how blessed I am, I can say with David, Who am I, O LORD God, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far? (1 Chron. 17:16). Here I am, a man from the hills of Kentucky and a former door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesman, former minister of Westminster Chapel.

Saul of Tarsus never really got over God saving him. He loved to relate the account of his conversion again and again. He was so thankful (1 Tim. 1:12–17). Likewise I will never get over the fact that God has saved me, forgiven me of so much, and kept me from falling a thousand times. Moreover, He has been pleased to use me, for which I am eternally grateful.

He has given me a wonderful wife and beautiful family; He has given me the best friends anyone ever had, not to mention health and other blessings upon blessings. The list is endless. In the words of Graham Kendrick’s song, Lord, You’ve Been So Good to Me:

Lord, You’ve been good to me

All my life, all my life

Your loving kindness never fails

I will remember

All You have done

Bring from my heart

Thanksgiving songs.

New every morning is Your love

Filled with compassion from above

Grace and forgiveness full and free

Lord, You’ve been good to me.

So may each breath I take

Be for You, Lord, only You

Giving You back the life I owe

Love so amazing

Mercy so free

Lord, You’ve been good

So good to me.¹

—GRAHAM KENDRICK

While writing the book In Pursuit of His Glory, an account of my twenty-five years at Westminster Chapel, I became conscious that I must write another book that showed how thankful I am and not so much of my life story.

But at this stage I have to say more because sadly, if not incredibly, I have not always felt like this. Despite all the good things God has given us, I have also been a moaner, complainer, and grumbler. I wish this were not true, but it is. So I have wanted to make up, if possible, for the years when I was so ungrateful and unappreciative although I was utterly without excuse.

A trial, or any measure of suffering, can make or break a person. How do we respond to them?

I am conscious that you may say, I haven’t been blessed like you, RT. It is easy for you to be thankful. You have no idea what I’ve been through and am still going through. But strange as it may seem, if you do feel like this, this book is still for you.

I assure you that I too could tell a long (very long) tale of woes. But the truth is that I am literally thankful for the worst things that have happened as well. Here is why: my trials have made me.

A trial, or any measure of suffering, can make or break a person. How do we respond to them? Our difficulties might have led us to bitterness or despair, but they could have broken us but in a good sense. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise (Ps. 51:17).

Many readers may have heard of Joni Eareckson Tada. A diving accident during her teenage years left her paralyzed from the neck down, which could have driven her to bitterness and despair. But by the grace of God she chose to dignify her extreme suffering, and God has made her a legend in her own time. She is an incalculable blessing to thousands of hurting people.