Finding Beauty: “I Don’t Ever Want to Be Afraid Again!”

By Sheila D. Brock

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• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 22, 2021
• ISBN: 9781664198302

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Copyright © 2021 by Sheila D. Brock.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 11/04/2021

Xlibris

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CONTENTS

Acknowledgement

Introduction

A Childhood, Bitter/Sweet

Be careful what you ask for…

A Truth: 50some Years Later

Reality Sucks

Moving On

Fear: The Journey of God’s Own

Who Am I?

A Change in the Heart

Finding BEAUTY

I Am Apostolic

Did You Know?

Many Other Mothers

The Hand of Protection

The Hand of Protection

My Community

God Does Not Give Up On You

Fear to Depression

Fear: A Sense of the Word

What Exactly Is Fear?

Christians

Conclusion

In Remembrance…

References

Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the Holy Bible, King James Version (Authorized Version). First published in 1611. Quoted from the KJV Classic Reference Bible, Copyright © 1983 by The Zondervan Corporation.

Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from THE MESSAGE. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. Website.

Scripture quotations marked AMP are from The Amplified Bible, Old Testament copyright © 1965, 1987 by the Zondervan Corporation. The Amplified Bible, New Testament copyright © 1954, 1958, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. [Biblica]

Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

DARBY TRANSLATION (DARBY)

Publisher: Public Domain

Copyright Information

Because this Bible is in the public domain, you are free to quote from or reprint it. In the absence of more detailed publication information, if you need to cite it in a paper or published work, we recommend citing the website where you found it (such as BibleGateway.com); we have no additional copyright or historical data about this Bible.

Sheila has lived a life full of pain, passions and promise. Her writing delivers on the turmoil of her past. Poignant, passionate and highly descriptive-we can all enjoy her works; most of which is hard to put down. Be prepared to be consumed and glued to this book. It is a page turner.

-DeVonne Whiting, National Bible Bowl Director, Pentecostal Churches of the Apostolic Faith

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I commend Evangelist Sheila D. Brock for her courage to move beyond the stagnation of fear and to embrace destiny. As she matriculated through her studies at RBI, my faith was enlarged. I am certain that this book will be a powerful best seller and a great blessing to countless thousands. My personal commendation!

-Dr. Dwight D. Brock, D.Min., DHL

President, Rowe Bible Institute (RBI)

Acknowledgement

First given Honor to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who is the head of my life. I thank you God, for Jesus! I could not have written this book without your helping me put my experiences and thoughts into a life story to show others that you are a real God. You were with me through it all and you are a deliverer out of all our situations because you love us.

I praise you God for my husband, Keith Purnell, I love you Baby! The most serious man on earth. Grand in character, an excellent Servant Leader to God, and mankind. Keep up the good work! I honor and support you one hundred and ten percent.

I thank my momma, Martha (R.I.H.) for stepping up to the plate. You were the best mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother any little girl would love to have. Your shield of protection kept me and my children down through the years.

Momma Isabella, Your unselfish love saved my life. You did what was best for me. I love you so much. Don’t ever doubt my love for you.

To my favorite auntie, Cora, your love, your strength, your guidance and your words of encouragement, I have kept in my heart file down through the years. You seeded much into me and I have grown in greatness. You did that!

My Bffs: Bettina, Mary, and Paula in Kansas City, Missouri, Marietta, Pia, and Francis in Washington, DC, and I dare not forget Tamara in New York City, Ride or Die, we sisters!

I want to thank God for all my children – My beautiful queens; Melissa (R.I.H.), Ramona My Peach, Maria my twin- Double-time trouble making a comeback, Shelia my Scholar, Valerie my gorgeous Gizmo, Keyona my Beautycian, my Sherry Sweet Berry, and my Jameila MeilaBoo. Then there are my handsome kings; Herbert my Shugaman, Laurence Fez, Andrew my The Best Son, and my Jonathan Jondo - Changing the Game."

To my three closest grands: Khalil Kyre for sticky with grandma. You always told me everything would be alright and guess what, "It is. Most of all, thank you for laughing with me and for laughing at me, for not disrespecting me when I fussed. We always have some fun, fun times! You are the first and one of the best grandsons I have, forever. Marquise, My Quiseyman", Lord knows you my lil’ man. Took me back a few years to how wonderful motherhood was all about. I remember you use to ask, "You alwight gumma?" LOL And my SunniShine. Like the song the Clark Sisters sang, Sunni, "You brought the sunshine into my life". I love you so much. #grandmagirl #myshugawuga On my darkest days, I can call my Sunni and she will do something or try to say something to make me smile. I can bank on it.

To all of my family, friends and others who loved me, prayed for and with me, you have been my inspiration to get this writing done.

Introduction

Ministry has become a huge interest for many seeking religions and wanting homage in communities today. I wonder, do those working in the vineyard realize the importance of servant leadership and building in others love, strength, encouragement, and greatness?

What’s more interesting is knowing when you are active in some type of religion, how your testimony about real life in your surrounding communities and/or other areas under a covering, seriously, could help someone else make a better decision to change their way of doing life.

Many stories are heard that might be that testimonial that ignites hope in them. They begin to believe they can make it if they seek the Lord and start a turning from their sinful ways. They learn the depth of obedience, draw closer to that thing that may instill in themselves and those close to them greatness for a more perfect way of living abundantly to better days ahead.

Keeping it one hundred is just that with many of us having a past infiltrated with those things, and some things we’ve got to take to the grave. The Holy Ghost manifests a testimony that you are covered by the blood of the lamb, but it is real to the hearer. The word identifies with their life and here they have been trying to figure out, how do I get out or change my circumstances and not only be alright, but put myself on a better path in this life’s journey going forward?

It is said and is it true? God is an awesome God and He is worthy to be praised for THERE IS NOBODY LIKE HIM! My guess? It’s a matter of whether you believe it or NOT.

My story begins with me born into a family of the apostolic faith. Torn away from my original family, faced with life and world realities, somehow my path leads me back to where I am supposed to have been in the first place, established in Him. My journey continues as my purpose shall be carried out as affirmed, called from the birth canal.

Jeremiah 1:1–8 says a lot to us about God and religion.

"The word which came to Jeremiah from the LORD, saying, ² Arise, and go down to the potter’s house, and there I will cause thee to hear my words. ³ Then I went down to the potter’s house, and, behold, he wrought a work on the wheels. ⁴ And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter: so he made it again another vessel, as seemed good to the potter to make it. ⁵ Then the word of the LORD came to me, saying, ⁶ O house of Israel, cannot I do with you as this potter? saith the LORD. Behold, as the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are ye in mine hand, O house of Israel. ⁷ At what instant I shall speak concerning a nation, and concerning a kingdom, to pluck up, and to pull down, and to destroy it; ⁸ If that nation, against whom I have pronounced, turn from their evil, I will repent of the evil that I thought to do