Searching for Hope: Inspired by the Human Spirit

By Martin Joseph

Searching for Hope is a fictional story. You will meet Julia Christianson, mother of three and a teacher, who feels the pain of tragedy and the brokenness of loss. Julia must find an inner power to survive.

The families depicted experience realities that they never could have predicted. Their unconditional love is tested, and they must find the power of forgiveness.

Much is also learned about the invisible population of the incarcerated, and the empowerment that can be found within their community.

The intent of telling this story is to give glory to God and His saving grace, to help give hope to the incarcerated, and to recognize Alcoholics Anonymous for the healing it can provide.

This story has been inspired by interviews held in a Department of Corrections prison.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Dec 4, 2020
• ISBN: 9781664210134

Martin Joseph

Martin Joseph is inspired by stories illustrating the human spirit especially when the human spirit is connected to a Higher Power. From the American Revolution to modern times, from George Washington, to Anne Frank, to John McCain; these lives showed a spirit that fought against all odds. What are some of the most difficult realities to overcome in life? Incarceration? Alcoholism? Loosing a child to a violent death? Anyone of these can and do cause hopelessness and a destroyed human spirit. The characters in Searching for Hope must fight against all three of these plights to find hope by asserting their human spirit.

Book preview

SEARCHING

FOR HOPE

INSPIRED BY THE HUMAN SPIRIT

SECOND EDITION

MARTIN JOSEPH

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Copyright © 2020 Martin Joseph.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, names, incidents, organizations, and dialogue in this novel are either the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

844-714-3454

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Scripture texts, prefaces, introductions, footnotes and cross references used in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Inc., Washington, DC All Rights Reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

ISBN: 978-1-6642-1012-7 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-6642-1014-1 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-6642-1013-4 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2020921069

WestBow Press rev. date: 12/01/2020

CRITICAL ACCLAIM:

SEARCHING FOR HOPE

I felt compelled to finish reading Searching for Hope, and I couldn’t help but recognize that Julia could be seen in the faces of so many others. The overall message of forgiveness is the one that will stay with me. Thank you for sharing this story with me. I am a better person for it.

An Elementary School Teacher

This family overcame many harsh surprises as they faced the penal system. This book would benefit anyone facing incarceration for the first time.

A High School Football Coach

In our life we meet people who are going through very tough times and Searching for Hope highlights the message that we should always listen, be kind, and be willing to step up to help others heal.

Branch Manager: Public Library System

An explorative story of a young mother’s courage and honesty under traumatic events in her life and how she persevered. If Julia were a person I would ever meet, I would be proud to call her my daughter!

Mother and Grandmother

This author’s descriptive style pulls you right into the story. Martin Joseph makes you feel like you are actually in the room with the characters watching the story unfold. Can’t wait to read his next book!

Business Manager

Searching for Hope reveals the tremendous power of unconditional love and faith to heal the broken even coming from the most unexpected places.

Editor and Writer

Dear Reader,

This author has a passion for stories that validate the power of the human spirit. Even though Searching for Hope is fiction, the truth is that our personhood has been created with a spirit that can overcome life’s painful realities.

Enjoy finding this very truth while on your own journey of searching for hope.

Martin

AUTHOR’S NOTE

This is a story about young Julia Christianson, and the fatal tragedy that crushed her. From a successful teacher and young mother of three, she finds herself on a journey that strikes with the pain of brokenness. Is there a personal power that can be accessed through the human spirit? In her quest to survive, Julia must answer this question.

Anyone wishing to e-mail the author, may do so through the following address: [e-mail]

Additional books may be purchased through WestBow Press, online anywhere books are sold, or from eBook publishers.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I want to recognize the many family members, especially my high-tech savvy and ever so patient wife, and for my friends who helped me over the years of writing this story. Their awesome support motivated me to keep at the hard work of crafting this book.

Thank You!

CONTENTS

Critical Acclaim: Searching for Hope

Author’s Note

Chapter 1 Seven Years Earlier

Chapter 2 A Family’s Beginning

Chapter 3 Tragedy

Chapter 4 Finding Support in Prison

Chapter 5 My Parents First Encounter with DOC

Chapter 6 Fredie Comes Through Again

Chapter 7 The Challenges of Healing

Chapter 8 The World of Incarceration

Chapter 9 Group Work and More Challenges

Chapter 10 Success!

Chapter 11 Finding Strength in Another Loss

Chapter 12 Family: On the Outside and Inside

Chapter 13 An Emotional Roller Coaster

Chapter 14 Compassion in Prison?

Chapter 15 Resilience

Chapter 16 Returning to the Real World

Chapter 17 The Past Does Not Define Me!

Chapter 18 Teenage Trials

Chapter 19 Finally, A More Settled Life!

Epilogue

Scriptures Relating to Searching for Hope

PROLOGUE

As the steel door of the county jail garage slowly lifts, and the March rays of sunshine pour through the windshield, Julia’s tear-filled eyes squint at the brightness as her thoughts run a rapid race through her mind.

How has this happened to me? As a twenty-eight -year -old mother of three and a teacher who never had so much as a parking ticket, why am I riding this prison bus shackled to the seat with my hands held in cuffs staring at prison guards holding shotguns across their legs? My five-foot four-inch frame of one hundred and twenty pounds can’t even hold the straps tight enough that tether me to the seat. The excess chain is hitting the back of the brown pants that I wore ten days earlier to my sentencing. Tears now stream down my face as my stomach churns with worry and thoughts of already missing my daughters Joy, Haleigh, and little four-year old Cindy fill my mind. The sadness overwhelms me.

How did I ever come to be on a prison bus? I feel broken and hopeless as the bus turns on the highway leaving my hometown of Johnstown behind. I take a deep, quivering breath and attempt to wipe my tears away with cuffed hands. The landscape goes by in a blur.

The bus ride to Chauncey State Prison takes six hours. But I don’t see much of the Pennsylvania countryside. My body feels cold and I just sit in a daze staring off. I can only think of the past events and my family. What an ordeal I have put them through. I hurt with remorse, guilt and shame which makes my palms sweat and imposes a heaviness on my heart.

After a long, numbing bus ride, my mindlessness is abruptly ended as the bus screeches to a halt. I peer out the barred widow and see a group of old brick buildings surrounded by a twenty-five-foot fence with rows of barbed wire rolled up above.

ALL RIGHT, LADIES! yells a huge guard. I jump in reaction as he continues. I will call your name. Stand as I do so! Julia Martin Christianson!

I rise tentatively barely able to keep my balance with shackled ankles. Roll call continues sounding like a distant buzz in my ears.

Welcome to your new home, Chauncey State Correctional Institute, begins the guard. "Listen to my every word and if you do, maybe, just maybe, you won’t end up in the hole! And oh yeah, thank you for my job security," he smiles sarcastically showing crooked teeth.

I am then taken into a wire cage made of 4x4’s and my shackles removed. I think to myself. The hole? What is the hole? I find out it is solitary confinement.

Next comes my cell- a twelve-foot by eight-foot room with a bench, bed, toilet, and sink. As the guard slams the heavy metal door shut, I jump again and notice the narrow door window that the guards could use to peer through. Laying on the iron bed with a thin mattress, I take another deep, slow breath trying to relieve the remorseful force pressing down on my chest.

Sometime later a guard approaches.

Christianson! a male voice yells. Up and out!

Where am I going? I’m too scared to ask. After walking down, a long gray hallway, I find myself in a large room where numerous guards surround a group of about thirty other female inmates.

A stout female guard shouts, Listen up! You now are inmates of the Chauncey State Correctional Institute. This is your first stage called processing. Because we don’t know the diseases you bring us, you will be confined to your own cell and processed according to the danger you present to us.

With bowed head I slowly lift my eyes to look around at the other women. They are mixed races, most of them younger, in their twenty’s. They sit with heads down and hair falling forward, some with tattoos covering their bodies. I wonder if these women will hurt me.

The guard continues, "This process is about giving you all the Do’s and Do Not’s of this facility and they are mostly Do Not’s! You now are under the control of DOC. This is a maximum-security prison of two thousand inmates. We got lots of very bad women here…many for murder. You are not to ask other inmates what brought them here so keep your distance from every one of them and each other!

"Forget about your lawyers. We are in charge of your lives now. You will be told when you can eat, when you can sleep, and what work you will do! And do not ask how long processing will take.

Obey every rule in your handbook or you will get written up. And remember the prison cameras are always on you. If you tick us off, you face the Parole Board, and your jail sentence will be longer!

As I am escorted back to my cell, I feel relief to know that there will be no cellmate. At least I’ll be safe for now! This place is so strange. Even terms to learn like DOC, which I see on the back of every inmate’s brown uniform. I come to find out DOC means Department of Corrections. Can I survive this awful place? To control the growing intense fear in the depths of my stomach, I stare at the concrete walls that surround me, and make my thoughts go back to a previous life.

— ONE —

SEVEN YEARS EARLIER

Power! That’s what Julia felt beneath her as Joe put his Harley motorcycle through its paces. The trees flashed by in a whirlwind of color. They leaned together as the county road curved, and then in a wicked thrust, this thunderous machine accelerated into the straight stretches. As Julia held on to Joe with her arms wrapped around him, she felt the wind and the force of speed that pushed her back.

Exhilaration! Julia noticed the goose bumps on her arms as the bike roared on. She loved this! As she breathed in, Julia could smell the leather of Joe’s jacket and held on to his muscled body ever so tightly.

Julia met Joe Christianson through a fellow teacher at KinderCare. This bike world was a stark contrast to wiping little kids noses all day. And with Julia’s personality of loving excitement and a flair for living on the edge, this was pure thrills. Life had its lonely moments in the new city of Johnstown. Julia loved her little girl Joy, born four years earlier in a previous relationship, but a little company, especially male adult company, gave her life a new dimension.

Julia’s first date with Joe was in the middle of winter. Even though it was a cold snowy evening, Julia was warm with excitement and nervousness all tangled around her heart. As a single Mom, an anticipated night of adult conversation and laughter without the Dora theme song playing in the background, made Julia’s soul soar. She paced her apartment when a knock came to the door. She took a deep breath attempting to relax and opened the door to find Joe’s smiling blue eyes with his hands shoved deep in his blue jeans. She saw his thick forearms with tattoos where the sleeves of his sweater were pushed up.

Hi, Joe said through his smile.

Come in, Julia smiled back. This is our home. It’s a small condo but big enough for my daughter Joy and me.

Do I get to meet Joy?

"No, not tonight. She’s at my grandmother’s house. Hmm. Asking to meet my daughter. Score one for Joe!

Well, shall we go? Joe asked.

Sure. Where to? asked