Ladies, Nonetheless

By Fran Hoyer

Ladies Nonetheless is a book written to fulfill a long standing promise. When Deacon Fran Hoyer worked as Assistant Chaplain in federal prison, the ladies would ask that she tell people that life for women in prison is not as traumatic as it is portrayed in the media. Their concern is that some of their family members are frantic with worry. Most of the women are mothers of young children who have nightmares, picturing their mom in a dungeon. So she promised, "Someday day Ill write a book about you" and thats how this book came into existence. The author begins by tracing the steps of how a suburban woman in her 60s became involved with women in prison. After six years her ministry came to an abrupt halt as a result of 9/11. During this time though she met a wide variety of imprisoned women, from all walks of life, all of whom depended on her for spiritual counseling. They ranged from homeless women who purposely committed minor crimes, just enough to be housed in the prison for the winter months, to a college professor who could never imagine her companion could be involved in illegal dealings. Deacon Fran used notes from her journals, articles written for church newsletters, and memories to give the readers a glimpse of prison life. We read of a woman giving birth in a cell, women on suicide watch, women frightened for their safety, women taking control of their surroundings and most of all, women interacting with women. Some were high profile cases and others unknown to anyone other than their intimate families.

In advocating for the rights of these women, the author points out the many abuses in the system. It poses a social dilemma, they have been placed there by our government for a perceived crime against society, do they deserve to be treated with loving care or with disregard for personal comfort and safety? Most of the women in this particular prison were not yet convicted, they were waiting to be tried. Its easy not to have compassion for the women as a group, they probably broke the law and now have to pay the price, or as the women put it, "you do the crime, you serve the time." But then, one has the opportunity to pick out individuals, just like the woman next door, or in your church community, and the compassion stirs within. Maybe they should be treated with more respect, given better living conditions, allowed to keep their humanity. This book, then puts human faces on the women for those who will never have the opportunity to sit on a metal framed bunk bed in a cell and comfort a woman who has been abused by family, society and life in general. Many of these women come from troubled backgrounds, neglected and abused by families and seeking affection from any source available. Many have had minimal formal education at best, and yet they survive. Some have come from other cultures and have no idea of being responsible to the government for their behavior. A Chinese woman was indignant that she was arrested for trying to earn money, "Its not the governments business what I sell, or how much money I earn." A Latino woman is confused, "I had to do what he said, hes my husband." An African American woman cries, "I need to care for my kids." A business woman from Europe claims, "I was just trying to do a favor for a friend." A Central American woman protests, "I never knew that I wasnt born in the United States, no one ever told me." These are the laments heard by Deacon Fran when she would ask a woman about her story, stories that often changed several times in the ensuing weeks. Quite often these women, if given the chance and a good education, could be leaders in their communities. They are bright, inventive, resourceful, but misguided.

This book gives glimpses into their lives. Their wish is that society does not paint them all with the same brush. That they can avail themselves of education, learn to read good books, and i

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Feb 21, 2009
• ISBN: 9781462815272

Book preview

Ladies Nonetheless

Fran Hoyer

Copyright © 2009 by Fran Hoyer.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

This book was printed in the United States of America.

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Contents

INTRODUCTION

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 7

INTRODUCTION

Prison . . . what a gloomy word. When we hear that word all sorts of images come rushing into our minds. We think of the movies and TV shows we’ve seen, mostly filled with violence. But then when we narrow it to women in prison the images get even worse. We think of the last scenes of Moll Flanders, filled with half-clothed, crazed women with animal-like behavior, with no self-esteem or any sense of decency left. Somehow, even though she is also a thief and prostitute, the heroine Moll is not as degraded as the mass of dirty, unkempt hags who grovel for food and comfort. And yet we think of her as the exception. Picturing your daughter or mother sharing a stark, dimly lit cell with one of those women could be horrific.

It’s a small wonder then, when a woman is arrested and taken to a federal prison, her family becomes sick with worry. For six and a half years I made weekly visits to these women and can assure you the Moll Flanders version portrayed in film is not universal. I have yet to meet one of those scary women. Their concern is for their families who are so worried that they are being mistreated, so I promised I would write a book for them. This is the book, a collection of stories about the women on five South, and my involvement with them. The prison became a sacred place for me during those six and a half years. That is where I was privileged to witness God at work within some very special women. Each week on my way home I wrote in my journal the events of the day and my impressions of them. As part of my ministry, I periodically wrote a short story about these women for the church newsletter.

Using those resources and my memories, this then is my attempt to keep the promise I made to my ladies. Of course names have been changed and some characters are composites of more than one woman, but the flavor of prison life remains. If any of my ladies should read this and recognize themselves I hope they will be pleased, if not, I sincerely apologize. But do know it is written with love and concern for you.

CHAPTER 1

Turn on the TV something awful has happened! It was my sister calling on the morning of September 11, 2001, a little before nine. The next call was from my daughter in Texas, Oh Mom, don’t go to work today! and finally from a man, a vaguely familiar voice that said, Oh good, you’re home, and then asked Have you heard what happened? As we chatted, I was so shocked by what was happening, I neglected to ask who he was and still have not been able to identify him. The concern was because the prison I visited once a week for six and a half years stands a few blocks away from the World Trade Center.

Fortunately for me, this was not my scheduled day to be there. I watched as did most of the world, in unbelieving horror that whole unforgettable day. I kept looking and listening for word of the prison. I could not stop worrying about my ladies. During the years I served as part time chaplain for women, I developed attachments to many of the women. I thought of how some of them would be able to see the chaos from the armored slots in their room that serve as windows. And I thought of how others could only rely on second hand accounts, knowing something awful had happened. I’m told the building shook, phone lines went out, but the electricity stayed on because it is supplied by generator, allowing some to watch TV. They watched what was happening just a few blocks away, as most of their families did, but they were not able to call home and say, Mom, I’m all right. To add to the frustration, they were all locked in their rooms for weeks following that first confusing day. It was more than a month before I was allowed to resume my visits. By then the ladies had been allowed out of their rooms, but the phones service was not fully resumed. Each woman was allowed one monitored communication with her family during that time. During that first return visit the women were anxious to tell me about their experience. Their immediate thought was that more planes would come and surely the prison would also be a target. After all, this was the facility where the terrorist accused of trying to blow-up the Trade Center a few years ago were kept. They felt doomed to die in their 8 by 10-cement block room.

After this traumatic time, I was allowed to complete the remaining time left in my contract. During one of my visits in mid February Chaplain poked his head in the door, Can I see you before you leave today? The ladies, ever willing to please the contract workers, offered to step out for a minute to give us privacy. There’s been a change in policy. The government is restricting access to the building, that means no contracts will be renewed for outside contractors, so next week will be your last week! I managed to nod and mutter, OK as I sat there in shock! Although, intellectually I could understand the rational, it didn’t make it any easier to take. After six and a half years this weekly visit had become part of my life, the core of my ministry. Just as months before when the buildings came crashing down, affecting so many lives, it now reached me. All those women I met and learned to love no longer exist for me, except in my memories and prayers. So now I share those memories with you.

CHAPTER 2

In The Beginning

Why do you go to the prison each week? and How do you see that as part of your ministry as a Deacon? and Are there that many Lutheran women in prison? Questions that bring a whole flood of answers to mind for me.

The Metropolitan New York Synod of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA) states, The Diaconate is a group of people committed to service in and for the Church. At the heart of the ministry of deacons are works of mercy, witness and worship, in solidarity with the poor and needy. To be set apart as a deacon, one must complete a prescribed schooling of at lease two years and serve a one-year internship with the intent of developing a particular, personal ministry. During this year skills are honed. The candidate and supervisor determine if she or he has the gifts needed to be effective in this area of service. In Matthew 25:36b-37 Jesus says, "I was in prison and you visited me.’ Then the righteous will answer Him ‘Lord, when was it . . . ?" In verse 40 he answers, ". . . just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of this family, you did it to me." Does this mean that God wants every Christian to welcome strangers, care for the sick, and visit those in prison? I hardly think so. Neither do I think that those who do not do all of these things will be condemned.

When I graduated from ‘diaconia’, a synod sponsored school, and was ready to begin my internship, I had no idea what form my ministry would take other than vaguely connected with women’s issues. At that time, as things happen, my Pastor’s husband was serving as Chaplain at a federal prison. His expressed desire to have a connection between our church and women in the prison is what led to my invitation. Out of the blue one day, Pastor Elizabeth surprised me by asking, How would you like to try prison ministry?. I answered without hesitation, No way! I know I have to stretch myself to be involved in an important ministry, but I’m 63 years old, what could I possibly bring to prison inmates? "Well then why not just go for a tour of the