Why? Why Not Me?

By Sam Gaylord

At some point in your life, you may have experienced a medical scare, felt the death of a loved one or was forced to go through a life changing crisis. Did you wonder WHY? Why is this happening to you? Why is this happening to your loved one? WHY?
Why? Why NOT Me? provides the readers an insight into Sam Gaylord’s life. There have been many stumbling blocks thrown at him. Sam has risen to the occasion, overcoming many obstacles. He shares with his readers how he climbed over hurdles and became more and more determined to make the best of his situation. Sam shares his doubts and fears. He learned to stop asking Why? and starting asking, “Why not?” Facing each one head on, he found the initiative and motivation to triumph, move forward and become a stronger man.

“Some men see things as they are and say why – I dream things that never were and say why not.”
-George Bernard Shaw

“Adversity is the state in which a man most easily becomes acquainted with himself.”
-John Wooden

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Apr 26, 2020
• ISBN: 9781728348490

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© 2020 Sam Gaylord. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 04/23/2020

ISBN: 978-1-7283-4851-3 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-7283-4850-6 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-7283-4849-0 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2020907449

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1     Anything but Normal

Chapter 2     My Early Years of Living on The River

Chapter 3     My Teenage Years

Chapter 4     United States Marine Corp

Chapter 5     The Cost of My Ticket Home

Chapter 6     Homeward Bound

Chapter 7     Standing Tall

Chapter 8     Untangled Plans

Chapter 9     Moving Forward

Chapter 10   New Heights

Chapter 11   Daredevil

Chapter 12   The Real World

Chapter 13   My Fellow Veterans

Chapter 14   The War’s Aftermath

Chapter 15   Am I Facing Death Again?

Chapter 16   The Relearning Begins

Chapter 17   Homeward Bound, Again

Chapter 18   Relating and Inspiring

Chapter 19   Back to Living

Chapter 20   Still Feeling That Stick from the Government

Chapter 21   My New Life

Chapter 22   Yet another Why

Chapter 23   Another Body Part is Lost

Chapter 24   Carpe Diem

INTRODUCTION

The purpose of writing this book is to attempt to demonstrate that when a tragedy happens, especially early in one’s life, it doesn’t mean you must give up or give in. This is relevant, no matter how serious the tragedy or experience is.

When we face crises in our lives, we often start to ask questions. Many times, when people face crises, they feel anger 39562.jpg at themselves, at others, or even at the whole world. A person who holds onto anger suffers the most. We must learn to forgive. Many times, forgiving ourselves can be the most difficult thing to do. If you want to have inner peace, this goal must be met.

Forget the idea that you must always be happy. We are not meant to be happy all the time. Life is about good times and bad times. Without the bad times, we cannot fully appreciate the good times. Experiencing the bad times helps to develop our characters and personalities. It can also help develop and build confidence in ourselves. You will develop confidence in your private and public life. You will obtain inner strength and confidence to be who you want to be. At times, you may have doubts. However, you will defeat those doubts when you start to develop strength and belief in yourself. Life can go on. Maybe not the way you planned, but life goes on. You will survive.

We must remember to laugh, sometimes at ourselves. Laughing can reduce stress. Learn to laugh, even if you do not feel like it. Never take yourself too seriously. When you do, it can get in your way.

Remember to live in the present. Life is a gift. Adversity can also be a gift. Look at it as a challenge and a hurdle to overcome. Do not look at it as a roadblock. Think of it as taking a different route than you had originally planned on taking.

Life begins when the sperm penetrates the egg. So yes, we are created equal. However, that is where equality starts and ends. Being created equal does not mean that we are born equal. Some of us are born with physical and mental disabilities. Some of us are born rich, some are born poor, and some are born somewhere in between. The luck of one sperm can determine what you will become.

Each and every one of us has an innate will to survive. It is in our DNA. Some of us are able to skate through life and not experience any physical or mental problems. Some have few problems and enjoy great lives.

Some of us have diseases, and we have experienced traumatic injuries. After we face these, our lives change forever. We have the drive to survive those initial traumas. After that, all bets are off. In order to continue improving ourselves, sometimes we must dig deep within ourselves. Self-determination must be found in order to progress.

We can have the best doctors, nurses, and therapists. At the end of the day, the most important things are our individual attitudes and our willingness to work to reach certain goals. Start with little goals. At first, you achieve small goals. Then try for bigger ones. If you set your goals too high, you will set yourself up for failure and disappointment. When this happens, you need to regroup and start over. This is the last thing that you will want to do.

As you meet your small goals one by one, your confidence will grow. One day, after all your determination and hard work, you will have the confidence to say, I’ve got this!

1

Anything but Normal

S unday, October 22, 2006, was just another day for me; nothing big or stressful was happening, and there was nothing to get excited or upset about. I vacuumed my apartment and sprayed some Lysol around the bathroom so that my girlfriend would think I had done some cleaning. She was supposed to be at my place at around six that evening, so I still had time to get organized. I had been busy. Her birthday was on a Tuesday, and I was planning to surprise her with dinner out at a nice restaurant on Monday.

It was late, and the temperatures at night had started to become quite cool. This was fine with me because I liked seasonal changes. I loved to sit in front of the fireplace on cool nights.

Time was passing quickly, and it would not be long before my girlfriend arrived, so I rushed over to the local Kroger grocery store to purchase some logs for the fireplace. While I was there, I also picked up some cheese, salami, and bread to go with some wine.

As I was walking up the steps to my apartment, I realized that I had forgotten to stop by the liquor store to pick up the wine. I ran back out to Liquor Barn and got home just in time to spray some more Lysol in the bathroom and light a candle (I didn’t want my apartment to smell too much like Lysol). Then I heard her knocking at my door.

I was looking forward to a quiet evening of sitting near the fireplace, sipping wine, and eating snacks. Shortly after my girlfriend arrived, I lit the log and poured each of us a glass of wine. We sat in front of the fireplace and chatted about our dogs. We both had small dogs: my girlfriend had a Maltipoo named Kaci, and I owned Kaci’s half-sister, a Maltese named Snuggles. These dogs were not only our pets but also our girls. The evening was going just as I had planned. There was wine, a warm fire, and a beautiful lady. How could life possibly get any better?

Even though the evening started great, it will forever be etched in my memory as a night that changed my life. After about five minutes of relaxing and small talk, I suddenly felt as if small needles were stabbing my tongue. My tongue began to swell, or at least it felt like it was getting thicker and larger. I had never experienced such a sensation.

I told my girlfriend that she needed to take me to the emergency room. At first, she thought I was joking. Then she realized that I was serious. I never liked going to the doctor, and if I felt that I needed to go to the ER, she knew something must be seriously wrong.

I don’t know why, but I wanted to look at my face. Something didn’t feel right, as if I was having an out-of-body experience. When I stood to go to the bathroom to look in the mirror, I almost fell. I looked back to see what I had tripped over, but there was nothing there. I made it to the bathroom. My face was a little bit white, and my eyes stared back at me. It was a very strange feeling.

My health was good. I was not obese, and I never had headaches. I had no issues with my heart. I had seasonal allergies, but that was about it. What could be happening to me now? I kept thinking. This must be something serious.

I managed to put the fire out in the fireplace. Leaving my apartment, I walked down two flights of stairs even though my whole body was starting to feel numb. My girlfriend went to get the car. I was able to make it into the car, and we left for the ER. Panicked thoughts rushed through my mind.

My girlfriend did not live in the same city as me, and she was not familiar with the best route to the hospital. I was trying to stay alert enough to help direct her to the hospital. We were rushing through traffic while making sure that we did not miss the turn to the hospital.

Unbelievably, I was in no pain at all. Shouldn’t I have been in some pain? I was getting weak, and my vision was getting fuzzy. I braced myself for a sudden onset of pain. We got about halfway there, and I still had no pain. I became really scared. Where was the pain? I knew I had a serious problem.

Was I falling asleep or was I awake? I couldn’t tell the difference. What was happening to me? Why was this happening? In my life, I had experienced many challenges but never anything like this. Why was this happening? Why was it happening now? Up to that point, I had always lived a charmed life. If this was it, so be it.

2

My Early Years of

Living on The River

M y memory will only take me back to when I was six years old. We were a family of eleven. I had four brothers and four sisters. We lived in a shack with two small rooms. We lived about three hundred yards from the Ohio River, across from Corn Creek, Kentucky. We had no electricity or plumbing. Our plumbing was a bucket and the nearby creek.

I walked up the hill to the bus stop, which seemed to be five or six miles away. It was probably only two miles, but for a little guy like me, it had to be six miles, especially in the winter and walking through the snow.

I learned at a young age how challenging life could be. The only contact we had with the outside world was when we went to school. My family pretty much stayed isolated from others. We had no close neighbors. Since we lived at the foot of a holler, our nearest neighbor lived about a mile up the river.

There was a rumor that the holler was haunted. Riverboat captains had told stories of hearing a woman scream in the holler near Marble Hill, where we lived. Rumor had it that the woman was screaming because she was being killed by a huge animal, which supposedly roamed the woods near the river.

Herman, our neighbor who lived up the river, said he had seen this animal one night. He said that it was hairy and had the head of a wolf and the body of a bear. He said that it had been walking on its hind legs when he shot it. Then it had growled, snorted, and