Help Me Help You: Get Your Mind Right

By Brian Petree

Help Me Help You is a culmination of lessons learned on one man’s journey to grow in the grace and knowledge of Jesus. Inside are tips and tactic from a self-professed knucklehead prodigal turned evangelist. Insights developed through life experiences as a rebel, prison guard, SWAT operator, middle school teacher, college professor, youth director, and single parent are presented in a relatable way to help anybody get better at winning the battles in their mind.
Our spirits must be fed just like our bodies. This book will help you identify and enjoy the all-you-can-eat buffet of soul food that is out there for you.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Mar 6, 2020
• ISBN: 9781973686316

Brian Petree

Brian Petree is a former youth director who founded Finding Life Inc. to help people stay encouraged by recognizing the voice of God all around them. He received his master’s degree in leadership from the University of Oklahoma where he later taught conflict resolution. Helping others resolve the conflicts in their own mind has become his life’s mission.

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Copyright © 2020 Brian Petree.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

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Bloomington, IN 47403

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-9736-8630-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-8632-3 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-8631-6 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2020903124

WestBow Press rev. date: 03/2/2020

CONTENTS

Acknowledgements

Introduction

Part I Drop the Baggage

Chapter 1 Lighten your load

Chapter 2 Be Transformed

Chapter 3 He Loves You Where You Are

Part II Choose Wisely

Chapter 4 Angels Among Us

Chapter 5 Know the Truth

Chapter 6 God is There Too

Part III Sharpen Your Senses

Chapter 7 Focus on the Good Stuff

Chapter 8 Check your hearing

Chapter 9 Be Still

Part IV Be A Good Steward

Chapter 10 Manage Your Gear

Chapter 11 Manage Your Pain

Chapter 12 Manage Your Fear

Closing

Notes

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I dedicate this book to my family-

those I’m related to by blood and my brothers and sisters in Christ.

My dad, Robert Howard Petree, who was an

amazing example of being an encourager.

My mom, Mary Colleen Petree, who is the

kindest, most selfless human I know.

My brother, Terry Ray Petree, who has always

had my back, protected and defended me.

My son, Robert Ray Petree, who is serving

our country, making me proud.

My nieces, Renee and Rachel Petree, who boldly

stand out as Godly young women.

My sister-in-law Janice; aunt Linda; uncle Frank; uncle Greg; cousin Vickie and her husband, Dave; cousins Kristi, Sherry, Jamie who are all believers that gave me input and support

I thank God for amazing friends from coast-to-coast and want to thank each of the individuals below who contributed to this project with encouraging words, feedback, or proofreading:

Joey Dunlap; Mike McGonigal; Florencio Gonzalez; Jason Loveland; James Kitchel; Brent Bloom; Danny Holtsclaw; Dangeo Joseph; Lance Sellon; Matt and Twila Pouliot; Dr. Katarina Lindley; Yvonne Lawson; Tandy Low; Sharon Lair; Misty and John Shibley; Chris and Cade Wegener; Sam Russo; Matt Garcia; Nicki McNaney; Brent Stovall; Jeff Harris; Keli Culver; Julie Jay; Karrie Ann Wesley; Perry Crisp; Travis Schutten; Paul Erickson; Chris Francis; Pete Lovo; Bill Albrecht; Phil Armor; Shannon Coyne; Michael Flowers; Lee Stephens; Debby Herrington; Amy Hervey; Cyrstal Wajda Bennett; Amy Johnson; Bruce Storm; Carson Wiens; Charley Henthorn; Chuck and Cindy Burks; Cindy Huddleson; Lura Hindman

To my girl, Mechael –

You have blessed my life with your presence. Your prayers

and support have meant so much to me. I couldn’t have

completed this book and I couldn’t do life without you.

Thank you, my Love, for all that you do.

INTRODUCTION

Help Me Help You is a compilation of insights learned by a student of life and follower of Christ. My time on earth has been a unique roller coaster ride with lessons learned the hard way and second chances I didn’t deserve. In my lifetime, I have been rebellious and obedient; wise and unwise; a follower and a leader; a student and a teacher; one who runs from the law and one who enforces it. I have experienced the valleys and the mountaintops and through it all learned some universal truths that help me keep my mind right, whether I’m on top or at rock bottom. If you wrestle with guilt, fear, worry, anxiety, self-doubt, or depression, you fight an enemy I know well. I hope you allow me to help you achieve victory.

This book is a mixture of lessons learned the hard way during seasons of rebellion and wisdom attained through faithful, diligent study of God’s word. I spent the last several years rereading and organizing notes from a vast array of sources in an effort to put it all together in a way that encourages others. I compressed the information into four universal truths that we will discuss in detail. My goal is to encourage and help you get better at tuning out junk and tuning in the good stuff that helps you win the battles in your mind.

The first of those universal truths is that each and every one of us is loved unconditionally. The second is we can choose what takes up residence in our mind. The third is that sometimes we have to work on our listening skills to really hear what we need to hear. The fourth is that the difficult seasons, the time in the valleys, always have purpose and often accompany the biggest lessons. I hope to help you learn to listen closer, to the softest whispers and during the darkest seasons in the valley. Learning to view every life experience through the eyes of faith has taught me to find peace in any situation, and I want to help you do the same.

Commanded to love

When Jesus was asked which of His teachings were the most important, He said it was to love God and love others. He did not say a word about limitations on who is worthy to receive that love. The command was not to love God plus a select group of like-minded people. He did not tell his followers to love others only when they have their life together. There were no stipulations or disqualifiers. It was simply to love God and love people. That was it.

If you have been told that you’re disqualified because of your lifestyle or ethnicity, political or other affiliation, someone told you a lie. If you’ve been told you’re less valuable because of your past mistakes, you’ve been told a lie. True followers of Jesus Christ love you right where you are. We love you because the Savior taught us to love you. We love you because He first loved us. No questions asked.

Jesus’ statement about loving God and loving people is known as the Great Commandment. So, I love you because I was commanded to do so. I don’t get to pick and choose who I love or when I love them. My task as an ambassador of Christ is to demonstrate His love at all times, to all people.

I spent a significant amount of time in the principal’s office in junior high and high school. During one of my many trips to the principal’s office, I noticed something that had been embroidered and framed hanging on the wall: What if God were only as patient with you as you are with your children? How fortunate for me that my principal’s standard for patience with me was Almighty God’s patience.

I’d like to tell you that I outgrew my rebellious ways after all those swats in junior high school, but I cannot. Fortunately, there have been many other influencers in my life who have used that same standard of patience with me as that junior high principal. My rebellious ways led me down the wrong path, into the depths of the valley many times, but never so far that I could not hear God when I stopped to really listen.

King David wrote about God’s presence in the valley of the shadow of death in Psalm 23. In Psalm 40 he said God was there to pull him up out of the slimy pit when the consequences of his past sin had driven him into the dark. Like David, I have learned to recognize God’s presence in the darkest valleys and slimiest pits. Other believers, like that junior high principal, have demonstrated God’s love and patience to me, and I have learned to listen. I hope you’ll allow me to pay it forward. If you’re in the pit, I hope you’ll help me help you get out.

There may be some of you who are going through a difficult season right now and are not feeling that love. Maybe you are searching for something more tangible than me just telling you that you are loved. You need detailed instructions for getting out of the funk you are in. If this is you, you are in luck. I have a friend who can’t stand long winded explanations or responses. When he thinks someone is giving too much detail, he says he just wants to see the baby, not hear about labor pains. He has told me to give him the baby and not the labor pains more times than I can count, so I feel confident you are about to get all the details you could want.

Twenty-eight years ago, Mr. Give-Me-The-Baby-Not-The-Labor-Pains and I were passengers in a horrible car wreck that took our sweet friend Holly’s life. I miraculously survived despite a list of injuries the doctors said should have killed me. There were other experiences later in my life during my years as a daredevil and crime fighter where I inexplicably escaped death. In fact, our sniper on my SWAT team changed my name from Petree to 9 Lives, because of the frequency of events where I should have died but did not. I knew all those years ago when I survived that car wreck that I was given bonus time here because I had some higher purpose. I have come to the realization that helping others stay encouraged is that calling.

Seeking and Saving

A few years ago, I attended a workshop called the Chazown Experience which is designed to help people understand their calling and create a vision for it. Chazown is a Hebrew word that means dream, revelation, or vision. In Luke 19:10, Jesus said that His chazown was to seek and save that which is lost. My chazown is strengthening others by sharing wisdom and providing encouragement.

One of the bible verses that has always resonated with me is Galatians 6:2, where believers are instructed to carry each other’s burdens. My seasons in the valleys were part of my training to equip me to do just that. If you’re lost, hurting, scared, and struggling to hear God’s voice, I have been where you are at and am committed to help you.

Part of that process of discovering one’s chazown is identifying his or her strengths. I have a strange Rainman-like ability to recall information I read or hear. I cannot go an entire day without losing car keys or sunglasses or a cell phone, but I can rattle off the script of an 80s movie perfectly like I just studied it yesterday. I’ve been studying God’s word, watching movies, and listening to music for forty plus years now, so I’m going to hit you with a lot of all three.

A struggle with depression and a long season of self-doubt and discouragement led me to focus my bible study on the topic of encouragement. This book is a culmination of years of study and lessons I learned listening to God whisper during those dark times battling depression and self-doubt. If you are a new believer and experiencing for the first time the attacks of a spiritual enemy whose goal is to keep you mentally beat down, anxious, and afraid, I wrote this book for you.

God can use it

I heard a sermon in college about Romans 8:28 where the bible says all things work for good for those who love God. In that sermon, the pastor made an analogy that made sense to me. The analogy in that sermon was a big pot of stew and how sometimes we might see individual ingredients going into a stew and think there is no way that is going to be good, but after the chef stirs all the individual ingredients together, the final result is delicious. I hope that you’ll trust God to stir it all together, the good the bad and the ugly, the way the chef does with that stew.

I have studied God’s word diligently for most of my life, and in doing so learned to connect almost every experience I have to a bible verse or biblical principle. The wisdom I have acquired reminds me that all things, even the bad ones, happen for a reason and can be used to encourage myself and others. My search for peace and wisdom has led me to the realization that encouragement for any difficult season is there in God’s word and also all around us if we learn how to recognize it.

It’s all in the instruction manual

Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing and hearing from the word of God, which is Paul’s way of saying that learning God’s word grows our faith. One cannot read an instruction manual over and over again and not at some point become knowledgeable about the instructions they’ve read. Reading the bible and applying biblical principles to life is no different than learning any hobby or trade. All scripture comes from God and is designed to educate us, equip us for Christian living and good works which include encouraging one another.

Twice in 1 Thessalonians, Paul instructs Christ followers to encourage each other. In 2 Timothy, we’re told that we are designed to be powerful, not fearful (2 Timothy1:7: For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline). In Revelation 3:20, God said Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. That hear my voice and opening the door to let God in business is something we will discuss in detail in section 3.

I hope to help you learn to use the word of God as a weapon against fear and discouragement. In Romans chapter 12, Paul talked about how each of us has been given unique talents. He said if a man’s gift is to encourage, let him encourage (Romans 12:8). Encouraging you is my goal with this book. Helping you see and hear God in the little things you encounter every day and connect those encounters with biblical truths is how I hope to accomplish that goal. Every bit of insight, coaching, and counsel I ever give will always be founded in scripture.

As I have mentioned, the bible is the infallible word of God, so we will always rely on scripture for references. However, I want to reiterate that I believe I am called to demonstrate the love of Christ to everyone including those not yet be able to relate to scripture. In order to speak a language that everyone understands, we will explore other supplemental resources as well as the bible. I can’t promise that everyone will connect with everything I share, but I can promise that nothing ventures outside the box to an extent that it contradicts the word of God.

If Christian books and Christian song lyrics are our only references, we will be speaking a language that is not understood by all, and I don’t want to leave anyone out. I have personal experience with speaking the wrong language from my days as a rookie crime fighter. It is one of many stories that would be funnier to me if the laughter were not at my expense, but it is relevant and too funny not to share …

Do You Comprende?

After weeks of having a Field