It's Just Me: The Early Years

By Ava Alexandria

As I sit here and think of all the memories I could write about, I wonder, why do I choose these stories? I guess one could say it’s because days go by so quickly that before you know it, we’re old. Those turning points I thought about in our lives have turned in the blink of an eye.

Whether or not you choose to complete reading this book is completely up to you. However, know just one thing: this book was put together with a lot of heart, soul, heartbreak, love, and, yes, tears. This book is written from three very different perspectives yet much the same woman, with very different stories of heartbreak and laughter. There is one very common thread, my love for God, along with my strength as a woman to persevere through some of the most horrific times of my life, not on my own accord—although at times I thought so—but by the grace and mercy of our Holy Savior, Jesus Christ!

I would like to take this time to thank all those who went on my journeys with me—those who supported me, those who held me, those who cried with me, and yes, even those who gave me a kick on the rump when I needed it! I would also like to thank my church for being our rock on those days our lives turned into nothing more than a swamp.

I dedicate this book to the ministry that has been helping me throughout the years, for all the goodness you gave to me and others.

In his loving grace,
Ava Alexandria

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jul 8, 2019
• ISBN: 9781728318349

Ava Alexandria

I am a sixty year old female, living in a small town, with an emotional support animal and a lovely husband. I have too many kids to count and even more grandchildren. My wish is to be able to see more of them. So I guess you could call me an empty nester from the baby boomer years. If one thing life has taught me, you do not only learn from school or from your elders. I have been self taught on numerous subjects that I have come to learn the biggest lessons are taught by children.

Book preview

AVA ALEXANDRIA

IT’S JUST ME

THE EARLY YEARS

39458.png

AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2019 Ava Alexandria. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse  07/03/2019

ISBN: 978-1-7283-1835-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-7283-1834-9 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2019909034

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

World English Bible (WEB)

by Public Domain. The name World English Bible is trademarked.

CONTENTS

Preface

Chapter 1 My Childhood Years

Chapter 2 PTSD/Depression

Chapter 3 Come-to-Jesus Moments

Chapter 4 Beset by Health Problems

Chapter 5 Love and Marriage

Chapter 6 Our Abby/Our Layla

Chapter 7 Life Now

PREFACE

Considering all the tales I could tell, I ask myself why I have chosen these stories. I guess it’s because the days go by so quickly that before we know it, we’re old. The turning points in our lives pass in the blink of an eye.

This book was put together with a lot of heart, soul, love, and tears. It is written from three very different perspectives, and yet I am the same woman, with stories of heartbreak and laughter. The common thread is my love of God and the strength that allowed me to persevere through some of the most horrific times of my life.

I did not do this on my own, although at times I thought so, but by the grace and mercy of our holy Savior, Jesus Christ.

I thank all those who accompanied me on my journey, who supported me, held me, cried with me, and gave me a kick in the rump when I needed it! I am also grateful to my church for being my rock when my life was sinking into a swamp.

I dedicate this book to the ministry that has helped me throughout the years. I thank these people for all the goodness they have shown to me and to others.

In His loving grace,

Ava Alexandria

39498.png

CHAPTER 1

My Childhood Years

I began journaling when I was a small child. Back then, people called it writing in a diary. We lived in an upper-floor apartment at the time. The hallways were dark and scary, and I often fell as I climbed the long, steep stairways.

I don’t remember a whole lot of good times in the apartment. One time, my brother tried to help me make breakfast. He climbed up to the kitchen sink by opening the cabinet doors and stepping on the shelves. I had already gotten the bread and a knife. All we needed was the peanut butter and jelly. But my brother slipped and fell and sliced himself from his belly button to his chest.

When I saw the blood, I ran to get my mother, who was sleeping in her usual spot. I screamed that my brother was bleeding.

When my mother saw the blood and the knife, she grabbed me and started beating me, yelling, What did you do to your brother?

Finally, he told her that he had cut himself on the door below the sink and that I had done nothing to him.

That made no difference as now we both got a beating for doing something we weren’t supposed to do. But we were awfully hungry, and my mother never got up from bed.

My mother was always very angry until one day a man entered her life. He had two children who lived in New York. His son came to visit. Boy, he was bad, and we got into trouble because of him. He used to play nasty jokes. He would talk my brother into shooting toy cannon balls at me, and the two of them would not stop till I cried.

One day, we all went to a department store, where my stepbrother taught my brother how to give electric static shocks from the carpet to make people jump. Well, my brother went too far when he reached up my mom’s dress and gave her a big one. She let out a scream like I had never heard before, but all she said was Wait till we get home.

My mother was out for revenge. The first thing she did when we returned home was to march my brother into the kitchen. Then she made him pull down his pants and his underwear to his ankles and kneel on the hard tile floor. You wanted to humiliate me, she said. Now I’m going to humiliate you. You’ll stay there the rest of the day.

Every time he walked into the kitchen, my stepbrother made fun of my brother. I couldn’t bear to see him and was upstairs crying. Mother always called me a crybaby, but I felt so bad for him.

Suddenly Mother told me it was time to come down for dinner. I tried so hard to eat, but watching the tears streaming down my brother’s face made me sick to my stomach. I ate as quickly as I could, all the while spitting some of my pork chop into my napkin for my brother. Then I excused myself, went upstairs, and threw up. Later that night, I sneaked down to the kitchen and gave my brother his dinner in the napkin.

We moved from the apartment to an old farmhouse. It had twelve-inch windowsills, an old stone basement with a coal bin, and no heat upstairs except for whatever came up from vents in the floor. My stepfather and my mom opened a beauty salon.

One rainy day when I was about five years old, I set out for kindergarten in my red boots. I was walking down the driveway when a snake wrapped itself around my leg. I froze with panic. The bus driver heard my screams and jumped off the bus. Now imagine this: You’re standing in the rain, a snake wrapped around your leg (your worst fear), and all of a sudden, a four-hundred-pound man with a cigar comes running toward you. And at the same time, your mother comes out the door shouting at you, Shut up! Why are you screaming?

The bus driver yelled at my mother, and she yelled at him to stop yelling at her. I had a snake on me! He removed the snake, swept me off my feet, and carried me to the bus, telling me, You will have a special place on my bus from now on. No one will hurt you ever again.

These were some of the worst years of my life. My stepfather decided to stop working as a hairdresser because flirtatious women were causing him marital problems. So he went to bartending school and got work at a bar. Big mistake. Mother had her hands full as he no longer came straight home after work and had affair after affair. She dragged us all around in the middle of the night past women’s houses to prove he was there. My stepfather would beat her when she confronted him. One night we kids tried to pull them apart. We couldn’t