Crazy … Yes!: Book One

By D. H. Crosby

When you do hear people talking about a happily married couple on TV, it’s usually about who is separating or who is having an affair. I’d like to challenge the everyday housewife to step it up! If hubby wants his wife to be more amorous, then he has to step it up! Why look elsewhere when she is right in front of you? I want my book to be about real married couples and the everyday life with all the hassles. My characters are devoted to their families. Their love life is a partnership. There are men and women out there who will be faithful and true. Don’t settle for less than the best! I am promoting sex—yes, between husband and wife! It is the best!

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: May 24, 2019
• ISBN: 9781728310893

D. H. Crosby

no ATA

Book preview

© 2019 D.H. Crosby. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 05/09/2019

ISBN: 978-1-7283-1090-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-7283-1089-3 (e)

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Part One

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Part Two

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Part Three

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

This is the same author that

brought the romance

to life in her six

books of the

saga

GM & GS Private Investigation Service

&

FINALLY … YES!

Enjoy the same amount of humor,

suspense and intrigue, and

family values that a

good romance

deserves!

PART

ONE

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CHAPTER ONE

N othing frays on the nerves like a woodpecker pounding its beak into a shingle on the side of your house. This morning the squirrels were scurrying in the yard, oblivious to the little menace with a red head.

Sipping her coffee she sighed, No use in shooing him away. He’ll be back tomorrow. My twelve gauge shotgun will damage too much. Got to call Bill and see what the Wildlife professional would do to keep that varmint away, she thought.

Turning to go into the house to get dressed, she saw a car speeding down her dirt road which was rare. Since this was private property, and a large sign was posted on the highway at the entrance of her road. It plainly stated that trespass violators would be prosecuted.

The red and black flannel pajamas hung loosely on her slender frame. Her hair was piled on top of her head, and she was barefoot. Must be Dolly. She’s the only fool girlfriend that she knew who drove like that. Like a bat out of hell!

She laughed at herself. Dang! I hope it is Dolly! and she continued to sip her coffee. She always enjoyed a good cup of coffee, and she leaned against the large veranda’s rail wiggling her toes.

It wasn’t Dolly, she just realize. It was a Jeep and the tall gentleman got out very, very slowly.

Oh Geez! she said to herself. What am I going to do now, she didn’t move just kept on sipping the hot coffee and peering over the cup’s rim. Plotting her method of subduing this man, if he turned out to be a criminal.

She had her black belt in karate, and her hands were registered as lethal weapons. In her bra was a derringer, and underneath the rail was a knife that she gutted fish with when she cleaned them.

This morning was beginning to be a real eye opener. The woodpecker was the last thing on her mind as the man walked up her steps, and onto her deck where she stood.

She bit her lip, and it was clear that this man came with a purpose. She was hoping it did not show how much he was affecting her. She squeezed the base of her cup as her lazy tomcat wound around her ankles.

You are no help Smokey Joe. Let me get you back into the house, and she opened the door for him to go inside to his cat bowl.

The tall stranger was not speaking. Just staring and dang-gone-it … he was smiling. He had the most perfect set of white teeth that she had ever seen, and a set of pale blue eyes that she could get lost in. They were taking inventory of her appearance. She was doing the same.

See anything that you like? he asked and grinned putting his hands in his jeans pockets.

He is wise to keep his hands where she could see them since she had a nervous itch to use her derringer.

What you up to Mister? deflecting his question and placing her cup on the rail to steady herself because this man was not from around here, and she could hardly breathe.

"Looking to buy some land, and I have only a few days to check out the available properties in this area. He was looking from the floor at her toes to the top of her head. She saw he was swallowing hard.

You a pervert? Keep your eyes up while you can. My husband will be back any minute, she stated firmly.

Now you and I both know, you don’t have a husband. I make it a habit of knowing everything about anyone that works for me, and there was that grin again.

The gall of this man. He is? Oh my God, she thought and then gasped. Her honey brown eyes were enlarging as she reassessed him, You can’t be? she said aloud.

He had reached for her waist and pulled her closer to him looking into her eyes.

Oh, but it is! he said. She recognized him from the newspaper clipping. He tried to kiss her.

She almost let him, but instead kneed him where it hurt, and walked into the house locking the front door as he stood holding himself and grimacing.

Shit! she heard him say and he did not move from her porch. Just stood there a full fifteen minutes surveying her property as she watched him from her window where she had quickly dressed in jeans and pulled on her boots, but left her red and black flannel shirt on.

She had a comb in her jeans pocket. She let her mossy brown hair down, and it cascaded below her shoulders. She flip it to one side and marched back to the door, and opened it without fear.

You must be Mr. Smith. She extended her hand for him to shake. He did not shake it, but rather massaged it.

She stared up at him, You are messing with the wrong woman, Sheriff. I don’t play!

The name is Travis and I was hoping you’d say that. It was a test. I don’t like my officers to be fraternizing, and he was squinting his eyes to make himself clear.

You do know Lacey how to protect yourself that is very clear, and he straightened to his full height with a moan.

That was just one of my moves, she said seductively staring into his eyes. He could take her and she knew it, and he knew it would do some more bodily harm.

Oh my goodness, he said. She is challenging me, he thought to himself. Her hair is getting to me, back off fool. He continued to talk to himself.

Her eyes … those honey brown eyes were penetrating deep down into his very soul. As he gulped and closed his eyes for a few seconds, hoping to erase this spell she had on him.

It didn’t work and he said, Don’t think I can handle any more of your other moves at the moment!

He was letting her know that she had damaged his goods for the time being, but when they were back in good working order she might have to fight him off.

That’s when she gulped and took a step back. Her shirt was half open, and the derringer in her lacy bra was exposed to him.

It wasn’t the gun that he feared the most. It was those voluptuous breasts that held it in place. He licked his lips and took a deep breath.

He was single, and he knew from her folder that she was single. His new job was important to him, but he was not going to let this woman out of his sight.

She is special. He told himself, You’d be a fool not to taste one time her lips because she will never let you try again once you’ve started to work. At this very moment, she was not one of his employees.

She could not believe it, he was reaching for her. Her decision to divert his hands or let them do amazing things. He knows what he is doing, and she didn’t care at this point.

She leaned into his arms, and he devoured her mouth. He wrapped his arms around her easily cupping both of her butt cheeks, and that’s when he moaned loudly.

She asked looking into his eyes as she toyed with the back of his neck, Does it hurt?

Like Hell! and he closed his eyes and sucked her into his world of no return. He was lifting her and that is when she realized he was headed to the door to go inside.

Do you think this wise? she said as she gasped and held his neck tighter. He felt her squeeze her buttocks as her legs wrapped around his waist.

Wise I would not be, Travis tasted her again and said, If I left with you wanting me,

Lacey closed her eyes, I agree, but hurry before I change my mind.

He got her as far as her plush sofa, and down they flopped.

It was touch and feel each other’s anatomy. The two were searching for the other person’s erotic zones. The increased moans were growing louder as they found a new one.

He was expertly taking her clothes off as she was doing the same to him. Then she saw the bruises that she had inflected and began kissing them as he was falling backwards into heaven or hell.

This was heaven, but it hurt like hell. Oh my god! She is on it and going slow. He looked up, and she was mesmerizing. Her every movement was slow and gentle. That was bringing him to a fevered pitch, and he began rubbing her magic button. Her head fell back and her mouth opened, and she moaned as loudly as he.

Then it happened and both their eyes were wide open. They stared into each other’s eyes, as they climaxed. It came again and neither could stop their motion. Wave after wave hit them, neither wanted it to stop. So they moved only slightly, and the pulsations gradually eased bringing them back to earth.

She fell forward onto his bare chest.

He had been with many women through the years, but this woman had him hook, line, and sinker. She is not going to stop until she kills me, he told himself.

He closed his eyes as her lips kissed his nipple and suck it.

So that is why women like that, he was pulsating even though it was bruised. It was still alive and working remarkably well.

Oh, baby! Can you get me an ice pack? he asked.

Just teasing, don’t you dare move, and Travis tasted her lips.

I’m going to need one too, Lacey said and then grinned at him and squeezed her buttocks tighter, and causing him to moan.

He was rubbing her again.

This is going to take all day, Travis said.

And maybe all night, Lacey said.

You know tomorrow, I cannot touch you, he whispered on her neck.

I know, and she pulled his hair and inhaled.

We will face tomorrow but tonight you are mine, Travis stated.

Tonight you are mine Woodpecker, Lacey stated.

Woodpecker? he questioned.

Yeah! I got one that grates on my nerves every morning,

Lacey said and smiled.

Oh Honey! I want to grate all of you every morning, he said as if a revelation went off in his head. That’s the solution. Marry me and the problem is solved?

You are crazy, she said without taking him serious.

Crazy … Yes! Crazy … yes about you! I’m on fire for your love. Will you marry me for real? Travis was now on bent knee.

Lacey said, If I say yes will that thing work on my wedding night?

Have no fear. It will, he reassured her.

Then yes, I will marry you Woodpecker. She kissed him.

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CHAPTER TWO

T he mayor was at the sheriff’s office talking to Stephanie Parker, his secretary and inquiring if she had seen the new sheriff yet?

No sir. He called and said he was delayed. He said to tell you that he would be here at one o’clock, and she grinned at the perturbed mayor.

He had arranged for a newspaper crew to come this morning, and half the dignitaries of the town would be here to welcome the new sheriff.

The silly secretary was giggling. He stared at her stone-faced. And what do you think is so funny, Missie? You know something and I want to hear it, and I want to hear it now! the mayor demanded.

Well Mr Hutchinson, if you insist. I heard through the grapevine that he got married yesterday unexpectedly, and she was smiling from ear-to-ear as she sat at her desk.

And? Mr. Hutchinson asked because this woman was the town’s best snoop. If there was a gossip item going around, she was the first to know it. She’ll know every single solitary detail, he told himself.

He furrowed his eyebrows and stared sternly at her to try and intimidate her.

She was not in the least intimidated. She stood up and marched in front of the mayor. Placing her hands on her hips because she knew dirt on him, too and he knew it.

Okay Stephanie what do you know that I don’t and I am sorry, if I snapped. I just had everything planned out! he was now cowering and sat down in the chair beside her desk.

Apology accepted. He married our own Lacey, she squealed and clapped her hands together in an applause. She did that when she was happy. She laced her fingers together, and placed them under her chin to keep herself from continuing to clap.

She was just so happy for Lacey. Lacey was a distant cousin and she had known the girl since she was a baby. Her working in the police department had brought them closer. She stepped up for Lacey when Lacey’s mother left town. She had opened up her house and her heart to Lacey.

Stephanie was a spinster, and Lacey was like the child she had always wanted. That’s why this news was extra special for Stephanie. Lacey called her Mama Stef.

Not Lacey Parker? Ben Parker’s daughter? Hutchinson then restated it. As if he could not believe his own ears. That girl hates men!

Everyone that knew her knew that. The men in town had all steered clear of her because she would put them in their place. For years a many one had tried to court her, but none had succeeded.

I know. I could not believe it when Janice from the Justice of the Peace’s office called me and told me. I told her she was lying! Then she faxed me a copy of the marriage license. It’s true! and she stared at him to dare him to say SHE was lying.

Well, I’ll be! he sat back down. That’s a good excuse to be late. I’ll have a bigger celebration planned at one o’clock because the town will all want to come, and pat this boy on his back. Now he was grinning.

Stephanie’s eyes got big as saucers. What’s that mayor you’re up to? she asked. If you want a party … I’m IN!

He nodded and took his cell phone out and started calling as did Stephanie. She was now at her desk speed dialing calls to all her cronies.