I’m Not Every Woman: Embracing the Woman God Created You to Be

By Barbara Bryant

How well do you know yourself?
Are you ready to own your glow?
Do you ever feel like you don't measure up?
Like you didn't make the cut.
Are you tired of the unrealistic expectations the world places on your appearance and personality?

 I'm Not Every Woman offers simple, profoundly intuitive answers to these questions. This book will show you how to reconnect with your personality, creativity, identity, and self-awareness amid the confusion and chaos of today's unrealistic expectations. With perfect clarity, I'm Not Every Woman demands that you get to know your true self.

 What Others Are Saying?

"I'm Not Every Woman will help you love, appreciate, and celebrate the woman God created you to be. We all need more of what Barbara shares and teaches."
-Robi Reed
Emmy Award Winning Casting Director, SVP Talent and Casting BET Networks

"An intimate, powerful, and poignant conversation about women, this book is poetic justice. It is lyrical and intuitive and provides candid instruction to the wife, the mother, the businesswoman, and every woman who wears a title. This book is a license to be free-to be uniquely who we were designed to be. No pressure, no labels, no rules, no borders. Just us! Great work, Barbara. I'm not every woman-I'm ME!"
-Holly Carter
President and CEO, Releve' Entertainment

"I have read countless books, attended numerous seminars, and watched many videos that cover similar topics as those in I'm Not Every Woman, but Barbara Bryant lays it out in a way that really lit up my soul. If you want to better understand yourself, this insightful and inspiring book is a perfect place to begin."
-Dorinda Clark Cole
Grammy Award Winning Gospel Artist

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Apr 29, 2019
• ISBN: 9781973661214

Barbara Bryant

The author believes her desire to inspire people through writing is an integral part of who she is as a person. She believes that her passion for God, people, and writing is the driving force in all areas of her life. Come walk with her as she takes you through a fictional journey based on faith, hope, and love interwoven with bits and pieces of her own life and heritage.

Book preview

Copyright © 2019 By Barbara Bryant.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

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Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

ISBN: 978-1-9736-6122-1 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-6123-8 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-6121-4 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2019905006

WestBow Press rev. date: 4/29/2019

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations are from the ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture taken from the King James Version of the Bible.

Scripture taken from the American Standard Version of the Bible.

Scripture quotations marked (GNT) are from the Good News Translation in Today’s English Version- Second Edition Copyright © 1992 by American Bible Society. Used by Permission.

To my beautiful granddaughter, Sophia Cottia Tillman. When God looked at the world He created, He said, "I think we’re missing one perfect granddaughter. That’s when you were given to us. You are the sunshine of my life. I dedicate this book to you.

Thank You

To my sons, Steven and Stedmon, who never read my books because they love me as their mom more than as an author. If someone doesn’t tell them about this book, they’ll never know!

To my daughter-in-love, Shanita. You embrace it all: vibrancy, beauty, youth, wisdom, vitality, and spark.

To Kathy Gray for spurring me on by asking, How’s the book coming?

I am especially indebted to Dr. Barbara McCoo Lewis, whose impressive leadership skills inspired me to believe that I had time to author another book. Your guidance has been influential, and my gratitude is unending.

To Lady Mae L. Blake, whose invitation to speak at the West Angeles Cathedral in Los Angeles birthed this writing for all women. Thank you for helping me put the final touches on this book by writing a compelling foreword. You always make me feel so special. I am humbled and grateful for your support.

My acknowledgment would be incomplete without thanking the biggest source of my strength, my late mother, Jessie Mae Stewart, who inspired me always to be the woman God created me to be. You will live forever in me.

To my wonderful readers, thank you for purchasing this book. I love you all.

If you enjoy the book, you will love the sermon I’m Not Every Woman.

Purchase the CD or download the MP3 at www.barbarabryant.com.

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Contents

Foreword

Introduction

Section One

Chapter 1     No One Like You

Chapter 2     Treasure Your Uniqueness

Chapter 3     Are You a Genuine Fake?

Chapter 4     How to Fail: Fake It ’til You Make It

Section Two

Chapter 5     Mistake or Masterpiece?

Chapter 6     You Are Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

Chapter 7     It’s All Good

Chapter 8     You Are a Gift of God: Top Quality

Chapter 9     You Matter! Learn to Celebrate You

Section Three

Chapter 10   Image Is Everything

Chapter 11   Don’t Let Others Define You

Chapter 12   Don’t Believe the Hype

Chapter 13   Your Exterior Does Not Change Your Interior

Chapter 14   The Compare-and-Compete Game

Chapter 15   Don’t Let People’s Opinions Control You

Chapter 16   Watch Out for Controllers

Section Four

Chapter 17   Limit What You’ll Allow in Your Yard

Chapter 18   Say Yes and Really Mean It

Chapter 19   Every Woman Has an Enemy

Chapter 20   You Are Too High to Go Low

Chapter 21   Don’t Fall from Grace

Section Five

Chapter 22   You Are an Incredible Multitasker

Chapter 23   Be the Best You: Good Enough

Chapter 24   Be Sweet to Yourself

Chapter 25   Your Personal Brand

Chapter 26   You Have No Idea

Section Six

Chapter 27   Don’t Tie Your Worth to Earth

Chapter 28   You Are Power Loaded

Chapter 29   You’re a Cover Girl

Chapter 30   You Are Not Every Woman

Final Thoughts from the Author: My Prayer

Also by Barbara Bryant

Endnotes

Foreword

I had the wonderful privilege of hearing the sermon I’m Not Every Woman by Barbara Bryant in a church setting at the West Angeles Cathedral, where my husband, Bishop Charles E. Blake Sr., serves as senior pastor. Wow, were we blessed!

In this insightful book, I’m Not Every Woman, author and speaker Barbara Bryant’s own life story is revealed. With her trademark transparency, she shares practical, simple advice that will enlighten you and propel you to be the woman God has created you to be.

Reflecting Barbara’s unflinching faith and tenacity, this book will encourage you to reach your true potential. It is as real as life can get—captivating, enlightening, inspiring, and empowering. With wit and wisdom, Barbara offers tools a woman needs to fall in love with herself. And from that foundation, she can embrace the unique woman God has created her to be.

I think every woman should read and have a copy of I’m Not Every Woman in her library because it is packed with valuable words that will empower you to be you and to live your best life. I also recommend reading the book in its entirety with Post-It notes, a highlighter, or any other method you can use to identify the statements that ring your particular bell. Each chapter stands on its own and will remind you that you are truly an amazing lady. So dive right in, drink from these pages, and unleash the you that the world has yet to see.

There is no doubt that for Barbara, writing this book was a labor of love.

For you, I hope reading it will be as well.

Lady Mae L. Blake

Lady Mae Lawrence Blake

Introduction

Dear Friend,

I’m really glad you’re here, and I hope you’ll walk with me through this book, cover to cover. There’s something in these pages that’s especially for you. I believe you picked up this book for a divine reason, even if simply to be reminded that you possess a combination of strengths, talents, and purposes that are solely, remarkably, distinctively unique from every other woman in the world. Perhaps you’ve heard these truths before, but you’ve never owned them. If not, this book is an invitation for you to at last embrace the uniqueness of you that is solely your own.

Every woman who travels through this book will experience the journey differently. Women who are confident that they are a unique creation in Christ Jesus see life as few others do. Instead of walking through the motions of life, or faking it, they own their authenticity and pursue the divine purposes for which God created them.

I’m Not Every Woman comes straight from my heart and aims for your heart. Over the years, I’ve learned how to love what I can’t change about myself and how to change what I can of the things I don’t love. I’ve also learned how to use the empowering of the Spirit of God within me to partner with Him to be further molded into the special woman He purposed. A woman created to bring light, joy, confidence, encouragement, and godly wisdom to all who cross my path.

I’ve included chapters that share practically how you can simply be yourself in all areas of your life—emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. Because I’ve learned how to enjoy being me, I wrote this book to guide others into true happiness and peace, which come from recognizing and embracing the joy of being yourself—because you are not every woman!

As you read this book, I pray you will discover, or rediscover, your uniqueness. I pray you will not only own your uniqueness and pricelessness but also enjoy and love being you! I challenge you to be your own person, to disregard what you perceive others may think, and to cease any self-sabotaging thoughts and habits. The truth is this: No one, not a single person, can take your particular purposed place in this life. No one before you and no one to come. You will never meet anyone exactly like you, with your combination of temperament, interests, abilities, and style, because there is only one you, created absolutely unique!

Reading I’m Not Every Woman is like sitting down with a good friend and visiting about the things that matter most. You’ll be filled with courage, determination, and inspiration to be the best you possible. I’ve arranged the topics so you can either read the chapters in the order arranged or choose your own order from the table of contents. No matter where you start, I pray you’ll devour every chapter and be challenged and cheered to embrace yourself as God’s unique and whole woman of God.

You’ll be reminded again and again about these core truths:

You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).

You are God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus (Ephesians 2:10).

You are not every woman!

Your girlfriend in God,

Barbara Bryant

Section One

A human being is a single being.

Unique and unrepeatable.

—Eileen Caddy¹

Chapter 1

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No One Like You

T here are 7.7 billion people on this planet, and more than 3 billion are women. Out of those 3 billion women, there is no other woman on this earth exactly like you . There never has been and there never will be. God creates only originals, and you are His unique creation!

It blows my mind to know that femaleness is everywhere, but no two women are alike anywhere. If you were to search the world, you wouldn’t find two women who have the same footprint, handprint, smile, or laugh. Whether you’re a mother, grandmother, stepmom, sister, daughter, auntie, entrepreneur, entertainer, actor, or author, you have an exclusive identity in Christ Jesus, for God does not use a mass production line. You are not a carbon copy. You are not a repeat or a prototype.

On many occasions, we’ve been confronted