There Was a Time

By Dr. Kenneth Reed

Kyle Hayden has been the pastor of the Crofington Living Water church for over five years. He has delivered the same condemning message that has met with the approval of the congregation for the entirety of that time. In spite of the approval he receives with his shallow messages, Kyle has been questioning if that is all there is to ministry, keeping a few narrow-minded people happy with bigoted preaching. Not only is Kyle questioning his ministry, he is also holding a secret, a secret he is not even willing to let himself know or at least admit. If he acknowledges and reveals this deeply hidden part of himself, how will it affect his ministry, his children, the community he serves, but most importantly his wife? Rev. Hayden has to make a decision for authenticity before he can effectively move forward in Gods plan, but is there any moving forward authentically in Gods plan when the dark secret he holds can undo any hopes he has for the future?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press
• Release date: May 27, 2016
• ISBN: 9781504357739

Dr. Kenneth Reed

Dr. Kenneth Reed is an advocate for helping others find meaning in life through the purpose of Christ. Along with being in full time ministry for over 25 years as senior pastor of Gr8terway ministries, Dr. Reed is also a licensed therapist in private practice and full time psychology professor. Coming to grips with the authentic self is a frequent discussion Dr. Reed has with clients as a means of working through spiritual crisis. Dr. Reed is married to Elizabeth. Together they enjoy their three children, seven grandchildren, their work for the Kingdom of God, and as much travel as a busy schedule allows. Elizabeth, “Libby” is an endless source of strength

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Copyright © 2016 Kenneth Reed.

Edited by Belinda Robertson

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, names, incidents, organizations, and dialogue in this novel are either the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

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The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

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ISBN: 978-1-5043-5772-2 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-5774-6 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-5773-9 (e)

Balboa Press rev. date: 05/10/2016

Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46

Chapter 47

Chapter 48

Chapter 49

Chapter 50

Chapter 51

Chapter 52

Chapter 1

ANOTHER SUNDAY IS OVER; NO lives are changed, no one is saved, and life goes on as before. Everyone agrees with the sermon point, but no one is challenged. Tee time is at 8 am, Monday morning.

This Sunday is no different than the endless stream of Sundays that has preceded others. The church is dead, and they don’t even know it. Rev. Kyle Hayden offers the same platitudes for the people to say amen to, and the funny thing is they keep saying amen to the same platitudes every week. Congregational amens are offered when the church people agree with what is being said from the pulpit, whether they have really thought about the words or not. It is easy for Pastor Hayden to say the same things over and over, when, no matter what he says, his words are met with agreement. The congregation continues to agree with the routine sermons out of habit more so than out of heart-felt pondering. Their agreement comes from what their parents told them when they were children and what their parents told them before that. No one has ever thought for themselves and no one has thought to question the generational views. So what if lives aren’t changed and souls aren’t saved? So what if children still cry from abuse, and hunger goes throughout the land? So what that injustice continues to soar in the streets, just so long as these forty church-goers have mindless agreement?

That’s all that matters to the young preacher, a father of two and a husband of a dutiful wife. To look at Kyle Hayden, one is reminded of the athlete who forgot he was one. His body was once well-toned and muscular, having the ability to hit softballs out of the park or spike volleyballs over the net. But now, in his mid-thirties, the softballs are only going as far as the shortstop and the volleyball isn’t quite making it over, so the ball is simply cradled in the net as it drops harmlessly on the floor. His 6’ 1 carries the same 210 pounds it always has, only now that 210 pounds looks different. What was once up on the chest is now down in the belly. No, Rev. Hayden isn’t the athlete he was ten years ago, but then again, he doesn’t have to be. His days are spent at his office preparing for Sunday sermons. His sandy, blonde hair is cut in the latest hip pastor haircut, shorter on the sides with enough on top to make a distinctive curl. His blue eyes are hidden behind the now stylish, black-rimmed glasses. His look is everything one would expect to see in the latest high-tech mega-church, where everyone mimics the same ideas, where everyone and everything is said to be awesome, as well as blessed and highly favored."

Kyle Hayden and his wife Clair have been in the Crofington Living Water Church for the past seven years as the senior pastor. Being senior pastor does not come with special privileges, because he is also the only pastor. The position comes with responsibilities: Church landscaping, custodian, preaching, visitation, hospital visits, and outreach. The list goes on and on. However, Kyle doesn’t mind, because the job description, as well as the congregation’s agreeable amens every Sunday, means job security. In spite of his inner naggings for something more, Kyle knows better than to challenge the people’s simple religiosity, but then again, maybe he doesn’t know how.

Clair, Kyle’s wife helps with church obligations, especially as the leader of the worship team, since she is the church pianist. If the truth were known, Clair’s abilities at the piano are partly the reason Kyle was voted in as pastor. Preachers are a dime a dozen, but a church pianist is a rarity, especially for small churches where the talent of piano playing is quickly becoming a dying art.

Oh, there was a time when every young girl from a church-going family played the piano because it was a sin to do anything else. That was in a day when television was too worldly, and without a TV, there is no need for video games. The only thing to do to fill time was to learn to play an instrument, and that was usually a piano. But today is different; the church has loosened up, and, in doing so, has allowed for more options. Now that God has changed His mind on the viewing of mindless reruns on hundreds of Dish and cable-fed televisions and girls can now play sports in school, since wearing PE shorts no longer means loose sexuality. So, learning how to play a piano is no longer the only thing good girls can do.

Clair’s kind is a dying breed. Since there are so few, a pianist is a highly-prized commodity in churches and ministry efforts (except in Church of Christ denominations where making music with our hearts is still the correct mode of worship). Clair’s help in the church takes place after her teller job at the First Leaders Bank, locally owned and operated for the past 120 years. Clair has to work because, while the congregation’s amens come fast and easy, money does not. It isn’t that the church people don’t give, it’s just that their giving is inconsistent and dependent on their moods. Due to this financial dilemma, it’s helpful that Clair’s parents, Samuel and Viola Singleton, attend the church and are ready to help whenever the kids are in financial trouble.

Clair’s parents being in the church is somewhat of a double-edged sword. On the positive end of that arrangement, there is always Sunday lunch to be enjoyed at the in-laws’ house. They are also quick to pick up the expense of back-to-school clothes when Kyle and Clair’s children need the latest fashions for a new school year. Yes, it’s nice, when you’re the pastor of a small, financially struggling congregation, to have an available money source so handy to take up the extras. Even with Clair’s job at the bank and Kyle’s substitute teaching for the local school district, the Singletons have been a financial lifesaver on more than one occasion. Kyle internally struggles with this arrangement, but the convenience of it is hard to pass up. The negative side of this situation is the attitude of the church people. Samuel Singleton has been a deacon in the church for most of the past thirty-five years. His locally-owned lumber business has been the primary support for the church since the fertilizer factory shut down eighteen years earlier. If the truth be known, when Kyle was voted in as pastor, it was largely due to Singleton’s promoting the idea. Kyle is the pastor in terms of what is needed from a preacher in a small church, but his father-in-law has the power due to longevity and financial leverage. In board meetings, whenever Kyle is making suggestions, the rest of the board watches for Samuel Singleton’s nod of approval to determine their vote. Kyle can see all of this, but it’s just easier to go with it. After all, Samuel Singleton has always been in support of Kyle’s directions. Or is it that Kyle has been manipulated into following the ideas of his father-in-law, all the while being made to believe that those ideas have been his own? It makes Kyle sick to his stomach to think that it is true, so he does not allow himself to dwell on that possibility too often. Another negative has to do with the financial support of the church. With the Singletons in the church, the rest of the congregation feels that they are let off the hook where giving is concerned. Sure, they all give ten dollars here, twenty-five dollars there, but they never give enough money that will actually support a church and a pastor’s family. The people know that the church has the financial backing of Singleton Lumber Company and that the pastor is Singleton’s son-in-law, so they know the church’s bills will be paid and the pastor won’t starve.

The Haydens live in the Church parsonage. This is a home that is owned by the church and is provided for the pastor and the family to live in, in order so that new pastors do not have to buy or rent their own home. The church parsonage is often seen as a way to sweeten the pot when a pastor’s salary isn’t enough to coax a pastor to take the church. In current times, the parsonage idea is seen as obsolete because many churches now give a housing allowance (money that is not taxed by the IRS). With the housing allowance, the pastor is free to buy or rent, and the church is free from owning and maintaining a liability in a house. However, many smaller congregations still cannot afford a monthly housing allowance. When these small churches were larger and giving to the church was much more popular, a church could buy a house, have it paid off, and then for the next several decades move pastors in and out of it without the ongoing expense of a monthly housing allowance. But now that membership is down and money isn’t coming in, it’s nice for the deacon board to know that they have a house paid for, since they do not have the means for the ongoing monthly expense of an allowance. While the parsonage idea works well for deacon boards (since they don’t have to live in the house themselves), it is much less popular with the pastors who actually have to live there. For the deacon board that wants to exercise control over the pastor, there is no better place to do so than with a parsonage. When it takes a two-thirds majority vote from the deacon board to approve the pastor’s wife to paint a wall her favorite color or hang a picture on a nail in the hallway, the impression is quickly given to the pastor, This house is not yours and it’s a privilege for you to get to live here. There is also, of course, the matter of property maintenance. If a church cannot afford a monthly housing allowance, how can it afford the ongoing cost of upkeep? So, it is often the case that a pastor and his or her family will move into a substandard home that is not been kept up, where the 1976 carpet is coming up in the corners, a line of duct tape is keeping the seam in the linoleum in the kitchen down, and the colors in the house are to remain an off white so the board does not have to repaint when the current pastor is fed up with the board and moves out. If these conditions are complained about to the deacon board, the pastor is reminded that ministry is a sacrifice and that his or her reward is in heaven. Jesus said he did not have a place to lay his head, and often the pastor doesn’t have it much better in a church-owned parsonage.

The parsonage just described would fit the description of the parsonage at the Crofington Living Water Church, and the afore-mentioned mentioned attitude of a deacon board is also that of the Crofington Living Water Church’s deacon board. Until, that is, the daughter of the head deacon (who is also the primary support of the church) comes back to live in that parsonage as the pastor’s wife. At that point, Samuel Singleton, the head deacon, primary supporter of the church (as well as the father of the pastor’s wife), spoke of a revelation that he had received from God, Our pastor should not have to live in such a rundown shack! Renovations started immediately. Clair never had to ask if she could paint a wall or drive a nail, and the home was beautiful. Pity the previous pastor’s families that did not have a father or father-in-law on the deacon board.

Clair loves being the pastor’s wife. This is her identity. She loves being over the church’s prayer chain, as it affords opportunity to talk about the townspeople and congregation all under the guise of prayer concern. Promoting her husband’s ministry is of top priority and she even becomes upset when she feels that he has been passed-over in being asked to speak at the community’s annual Thanksgiving service that is hosted by the local Ministerial Alliance. She lives vicariously through her husband’s ministry, as it is her only means of identity, except for her children whose identities are being patterned after their mother’s. Alyson and her younger brother Trevor are frequently placed on stage by their parents, to be shown off as examples of what it means to be rearing godly children. Bring up a child in the way he should go… as taught by holy rite means parading them in front of the congregation singing the latest Christian music. The congregation makes remarks of how God is going use these children in a mighty way and how young Alyson will make an excellent pastor’s wife someday, never thinking that she actually might make a good pastor herself, that is if she even chooses a life of church ministry. The older people in the church remark how young Trevor will make a fired-up evangelist as he has learned to shout really loud during testimony services. Yes, these children are the Haydens’ seal of approval.

Without a doubt the Living Water congregation knows the doctrines they believe, they just don’t know why they believe them. It has been the tradition of the believers for years to follow Biblical doctrines in certain ways, and if they are asked why they believe it, their ready-made response is always It’s in the Word. It has never dawned on them to think maybe what they believe isn’t the Word as much as it is their perception of the Word. The possibility that they use their own traditions to develop their doctrines and then claim it says so in the Bible is too controversial. Kyle silently thinks of this from time to time. He feels that the Bible is infallible until people read it. After they read it, their cognitive perception gets ahold of it, taking scripture captive, and making it mean what their perception wants it to mean. When this occurs, scripture that is based on personal perception is full of contradiction and fallibility. But that idea is beyond the Crofington Living Water’s congregation’s scope of possibility as they continue to voice with confidence, The Bible says … . The Bible says. … The truth is, with the Crofington Living Water Church, the Bible is not allowed to say anything except what the congregation wants it to say. Thus, everyone in the church lives in a smug self-righteousness that has made all of life conveniently black and white. Gray areas are not allowed to pose a threat, because gray areas do not exist in the Crofington Living Water’s perception of God’s word. That is everyone’s perception except Kyle’s, and that frightens him when he thinks about it. Every Sunday Kyle expertly knits a version of truth into what is religiously easy to digest for the forty people who have trained and conditioned him in how to preach to them. However, Kyle himself wonders, Is this really as cut and dry as I’m making it out to be.

Chapter 2

HOW DID I GET HERE? Is this what God had in mind when He called me into ministry? Kyle often ponders. He does not enjoy the same religious upbringing that his wife has experienced, although at times he views this as a blessing. No, his beginnings are much less sanctimonious.

Tara was sixteen when she became pregnant and was known in the old terminology as an unwed mother. Nine months later Kyle was born. His mother, although young, was ambitious and, after getting her GED, put herself through college, becoming a dental hygienist. This was not too much of a horror story for Kyle. When he was four years old, Tara married and gave Kyle the little brother and sisters he had never had. As far as religion went, it was rarely spoken of and when it was, it treated as an idiot’s conversation. Kyle was soon off to college, discovering the intellectual challenges of sociology, psychology, and, his favorite, philosophy. He took a world religions course, but it just seemed to be a backwoods philosophy, sort of a knocked-down version of what Plato was trying to say. Kyle agreed with Sigmund Freud in that religion was just a crutch for the weak; therefore, he did not give it serious consideration.

It was after Kyle had graduated high school that his mother and stepfather found religion, and they totally bought in. Now they were constantly on Kyle to go to church with them. They attended a charismatic church that enjoyed the understanding that God was waiting around to bless them in much the same manner as that of a genie in a bottle, and just as that bottle needs to be rubbed to activate the genie, so must the Bible be rubbed the right way, such as jumping through the right spiritual hoops based on saying the right words and, of course, releasing faith through sacrificial giving in order to activate God’s blessings. Kyle was not interested. It all sounded more like a pyramid scheme. His education had taken root so that his mother’s blab it and grab it religion could never stand against the scrutiny of scientific method, empirical evidence, objective research, and the educational kingpin, Critical Thinking.

Everything would have been fine for Kyle if the drugs and alcohol had not become a factor. It was after his sophomore year at college that not one, but two DWIs occurred. The drinking had become a problem as it also introduced a lifestyle of sexual encounters and recreational drug use. The whole sordid lifestyle continued until Kyle found himself in a county jail waiting for arraignment regarding a drunken driving charge. Nothing too spectacular; there are a lot of other people with more astounding testimonies than his, testimonies of how God had rescued the down and out from death row or brought the wayward girl from prostitution. But it was while incarcerated that a Bible was handed to Kyle, and thus he began to read. It was while he was reading that he felt a relational urge, for a lack of a better way to say it, prompting him to pray, and pray he did. As much as the Bible reading itself, it was the praying that developed a faith, a faith, that for Kyle, solidified the reality of a loving God through a life-changing relationship with Jesus Christ. No, Kyle’s sentencing was not done away with by a miracle. He did a stint of six months of probation after which he concluded that he truly wanted to make a difference where he felt it really counted.

So it was ministry where Kyle felt called to make a difference by introducing others to a life-changing relationship that he had discovered in Jesus Christ. He began attending church with his mother. But it wasn’t long until he knew that what he had experienced in Christ was not the sales-pitch propaganda they were selling there. He turned elsewhere. He attended some mainline congregations, which merely reminded him of his university religion courses, a mere watered-down philosophy class trying to pass itself off as institutional education. No wonder the American mainline church is dying. He decided to check out a non-denominational church that was excited about