Cupid's Playground

By Nichole A. Carter

I feel my heart racing when I see his face. I lose all my words when he smiles at me. My best moments are alone in my bed when I dream of him. He's my best friend. I feel intoxicated by his touch. Suffocation when he's near. Motivated when I see his girlfriend, to let him know I'm the one. His name is Jason. It's confession time. I'm in love with my best friend.
My name is Melissa, and I've been best friends with Jason since grade school. It's now senior year, and I'm determined to let him know how I feel about him. With the help of Cupid and my friend, Kerri, I hope to find the words to tell him how I feel.
The feelings that I have for this man is unexplainable. I desire him in a way that makes me re-think my good girl status. He makes it so easy loving him with his charming, sweet, and gentlemen ways. I can't take being in the friends zone with him anymore. Girlfriend or not, I need his undivided attention.
It's wrong to have this much lust for one individual person. I never been kissed. Never been touched, and yet have this undeniable desire for him to be the first everything. I'm stingy and selfish wanting him to leave her altogether. It's senior year, and I'm not stopping, until he's mine.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jun 12, 2014
• ISBN: 9781491898048

Nichole A. Carter

Nichole A. Carter was born and raised in Chicago, Il. While growing up, she had always enjoyed writing in her spare time. Her imagination and unique style of tellling a story makes it easy to relate to her writing. Nichole dreams were of being an author to make people fall in love with reading again. She brings a new flavor to books, as she takes you to a journey you hopefully would never forget.

Book preview

Chapter One

T he wind is blowing gently as I stare into his deep hazel brown eyes. He takes my hand into his, and I feel a jolt of energy. I can’t believe on this night that I am right next to him and he is actually possibly looking at me like I am someone special. I can’t believe that Jason might end up as being mine.

I can’t stop smiling as he pulls me close to him. I can’t express myself at this moment, if I am asked to. All I know is that Jason drives me crazy. I don’t think he realizes how deep my feelings for him are. I feel myself stop breathing as his forehead touches mine and his arms cradles me. Dear, God, he is going to kiss me. My thoughts are running wild.

I just stare deep into his eyes hoping he can read every single one of my thoughts. Hoping he understands that I’m not like the other girls, and I love him longer than I care to admit. I want him to read my mind and understand that this isn’t just a one kiss thing. I need him to know that I want tonight to blossom into something special.

He chuckles a little bit showing his perfect teeth. I suddenly think of the time when we were twelve, and he tried to do a wheelie and fell off his bike. He had broken two teeth that summer. His parents banned him from riding his bike for the rest of the summer. I remember like it was yesterday, because we would take turns riding my pink bike. I start to laugh thinking back on those days.

This moment is that funny to you, Melly? He looks into my eyes. I shake my head unsure of what to say.

More like unreal. I don’t know how the words escape my mouth. I can’t stop staring into his eyes. I love you, Jason. I close my eyes right after saying the words half scared of what will come next. The next thing I hear is a loud annoying buzzing sound.

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Oh, crap, I roll over in my bed and hit the snooze button. There I go again dreaming about my best friend, Jason Scott. I lay my head on my pillow and close my eyes. I don’t know why my subconscious mind enjoys torturing me.

My phone rings, and I pick it up slightly annoyed. Morning.

Senior year, baby! I instantly start to smile when I hear this familiar voice. Jason.

I know, boo. You ready to do it?

Did you have to ask me, Melly? Hells yeah! I will be there with coffee and donuts in one hour. Let’s go!

I laugh at his energy. One of the many things I love about him. When did you start drinking coffee, boo?

He chuckles, and I imagine how he looks at this very moment. Today. Senior year. We got to get our maturity game up, Mel. New year, baby.

Mmm… new year. I mutter softly knowing exactly where he’s going with the conversation. You know you can do better than her.

Jason’s line gets silent and I just hold the phone in silence, not wanting to say anything more than what I’ve said about his bitch of an ex-girlfriend. Can I really? He sighs a bit.

Geez… now I had to perk him right back up. Me and my big mouth. I’m sure the summer changed her mind on you guys, boo. And if it didn’t, look at your sexy self and realize you can get any of those girls.

We both start to laugh, and I’m instantly happy for him. Thanks, Mel, you always know what to say.

I try to sound cheerful again for his sake. Bring those donuts and coffee, and let’s get there early to find your ex, baby. I hate when I do things like this. I want him more than he will ever know.

Got you. Hey, call Kerri, and let her know what time I will get there.

I look at my phone in disgust. Got you, boo.

I hang up the phone realizing senior year is probably going to be the worst out of all the years I’ve known Jason. I pick up my cell and quickly send a text to my second best friend, Kerri.

Ker Jas on his way soon. Donuts and coffee!! :)

She is the only person in the universe that understands my special feelings for Jason. I watch as my phone vibrates, and Kerri’s message comes on my phone.

Jas n u n a car with coffee? Hot yet? Lol

Lets hope.

U too chicken shit. Hope is all u do. Lol

Ikr… lol

I look at the phone and grin. Kerri is right. I’ve been working on telling Jason my feelings since freshmen year. I just could never get the words out, or find the right words to describe to him how I feel for him. It never feels like the right time

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I sit in the passenger seat of Jason’s car. He hands me my coffee, and I just look at him. He is just too sexy for words, all six foot two inches of him. Everything from his hazel brown eyes, down to his size thirteen shoes. Jason’s hair is dark brown with noticeable waves. His complexion is like a butterscotch candy, lusty full lips, and athletic built. Eighteen years old, and he has the ability to drive me crazy without trying.

Senior year is the year for no bullshit and all maturity. I shake my head at his words.

I clear my throat and watch him drink his coffee like he loves it. You heard from Leslie, Jas? I hate saying her name, but I have the urge to know how deep his thoughts are for his ex.

Naw. I’m just going to talk to her when I get to school. She texted me when she came back from summer vaca. He puts his coffee in the cup holder and smiles at me. My heart just about melt right then and there. Let’s get Kerri and get to school.

I smile at him. Deal. Bitch would be busing it, if it was up to me. Don’t get me wrong. I love my girl, Kerri, but I just want to spend some alone time with him.

I tell myself that this is the year I am going to tell him the truth about how I feel. My feelings are beyond any friendship feelings. Next year he’s going away for college, so I have to do it this year. The sooner the better. I’ve known Jason since the first day in kindergarten. Him and I been best friends since that first day of school, when he asked me to be his friend.

I stare out the window wondering when the best time to expose my true feelings. Should I tell him before he decides to get back with Leslie, or after she plays with him and rejects him? I glance at him and shake my head.

You need a boyfriend this year, babe. I look at him confused. I needed a boyfriend? Hell, I had one… somewhat.

What, Jason? Are you telling me that I’m lonely, and that you’re tired of being my date to everything? I start to laugh thinking how Jason and I did everything together. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I’m saying you’re way too pretty and smart not to have one. I’m sure you’re tired of me being your default date.

I look at him not sure rather to be overjoyed that he considers me both pretty and smart, or be upset that he considers himself a default date. He is never my default date. He has always been my only choice. I sigh and decide not to make a statement from fear that too much emotion will come out.

Why are you single? Jason’s question takes me by surprise. He has never asked me that before.

Looking for someone special. I take a sip of the coffee and try not to study his face. Things are getting tense in his car.

Maybe we can find you a boyfriend by the time you turn eight-teen, huh? He grins at me, and I give him a weak smile. What are we doing for your special day this year, Melly? I was thinking that you should have a party. He glances at me with a big grin on his face.

Jason always makes such a big deal out of my birthdays.

I don’t know. We will see how my mom feels about that.

I am so relieved, when we pull up to Kerri’s house and she is already waiting outside.

Kerri jumps into the back seat, and he hands her a coffee and the box of donuts.

Thanks, love! Kerri smiles at me and puts her seat belt on. Okay, you guys, we are going into our fourth year together! I’m so excited!

Kerri always has extreme energy. It is one of the reasons me and her are so close. I’ve known Kerri since mid-freshman year when she transferred into our school. Jason and her had a couple of classes together and became friends quickly. Then, he introduced her to me, and we became inseparable.

Jason starts the car and starts on the route to school.

Now listen to this: He broke up with me in the beginning of summer. Last night he calls talking about maybe we can fix us. Kerri shakes her head and takes a bite out of her donut. Fix us? That dude lost more than his damn mind if he thinks that we’re getting back together. Not this time.

Jason and I snicker at the same time. How long are you going make him work before you actually take him back? Jason questions what we both are thinking.

Kerri has a look of disbelief on her face. For real? Well, I’m hurt. She drinks some more of her coffee, while Jason and I exchange looks. Well, I am going back to him, but I am just saying it’s unbelievable that he thinks that he can break up with me anytime he wants, and then fix his fingers to dial my number the night before the first day of school. That’s all I’m saying.

I laugh at her. It’s okay, girl. We understand.

I shake my head and try to keep myself from looking at Jason. I make the decision right then that I will tell him today how I feel about him, after he tells me what happens between him and Leslie.

Yo, Ker, what do you think about Mel having a pool party at my house for her birthday? Jason smiles at me.

A pool party? Didn’t we do that last year for her b-day? That’s fine. Last year was a great party, so this year it should be better.

I’m going to set it up, Mel. Jason gives me a tiny smile and goes back to driving.

My phone vibrates, and I look at the text from Kerri.

Hes goin to set it up, Mel.

I heard. No need to repeat.

Mmm… I kno. Just makin sure u heard.

I giggle putting the phone in my book bag.

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Jason pulls the car to the front of the school to let Kerri out. He looks at me and smile. Are you getting out, or going with me to park?

Did he seriously have to ask? Boo, we’re going to do senior year together. Know that.

I spot Kerri rolling her eyes as she gets out the car. Catch you guys in a bit. She smiles secretly at me, blows me a kiss, and walks away. I quickly look at him to see if he caught any of those hints, but he is already scoping the area for Leslie. I can see it in his eyes.

Jason finds a parking spot quickly and looks at me and sighs. I’m kind of glad that Kerri went alone without us. I wanted to speak to you for a few minutes.

With just the few words he speaks, my heart feels like it is going to leap the hell out of my chest. Is he going to tell me the things that I need to tell him? Is this why he asked me why I am single? Or maybe this is the reason why he refers to himself as a default date? Oh my God, he has me at a point where it is becoming really difficult to breathe.

What’s up? As I say the two words, it sounds like I am having a hard time breathing. I clear my throat and try to calm my heart and mind. My palms start to get sweaty, and he’s just looking at me.

Babe, you good? Maybe we should get out of this car and get you some fresh air. Aww . . . so fucking sweet! I smile a little at him and shake my head. Damn it! Just tell me what you want to talk about. A whole three minutes passed, and I’m freaking the hell out!

I’m good. I speak quietly to control my breathing a little better.

He leans his seat back and looks at me. I think I’m in love, and I don’t know what to do.

I open my mouth and then close it again. I blink my eyes a couple times and then decide to pinch myself. Ouch . . . Okay, I’m very awake. What do I say? I open my mouth getting ready to tell him that I’ve been in love with him since we set the pet hamster free in first grade.

"And I know she isn’t good for me. I’ve tried all summer to get pass this, but it’s hard. All I think about is her and thinking of ways to make us better.

I close my mouth again. What? Wait? He is not in love with me? I’m suddenly filled with aggravation and became annoyed talking about her ass. No one wants to hear about Leslie and him. Not I especially.

Well, I’m single, so I don’t know what the hell to tell you about these things. With that said, I grab my book bag and unlock the door, and he grabs my arm gently. I look at him. What? I don’t know about relationships, boo.

You mad at me, or something? Yea, you are. I know you don’t want me to be with her, and that you think I can do better. Who do you suggest I date?

Is he fucking serious? I shake my head thinking how Kerri would have died laughing, if she was in the car. I don’t know. I sound so sad that he and I share eye contact for a moment. The knock on his window breaks us. We both look up, and I automatically grimace at the sight of Leslie.

He rolls down his window and greets Leslie with a big smile. Hey.

It makes me sick watching how he sounds like this is his first crush. I roll my eyes and just look out my window feeling uncomfortable.

Well, you said you wanted to talk about us, but I see you sitting in the car with her making goo goo eyes. You are really off to a bad start, Jay. She walks away with her nasty attitude following her.

I glance at him as he grabs the remaining donuts and his backpack. I got to go, Mel. She’s pissed and… —-—

I know. I nod at him and begin grabbing my things.

He smiles at me and grabs my book bag. I got you, girl. I lost the bet over summer, remember? Now I got to hold your bag to every class for the first week. We both share a laugh getting out the car.

Jason and I made a bet over the summer about who was the better swimmer, and I actually won. I forgot all about the bet, until he mentioned it at this moment. I can’t take my eyes off him as he puts his fitted cap on. I love him so much.

You always hold my bag, anyway, Jas.

I know, right? You treat me like I’m your slave.

We walk up to the school together, and in my own little world, with him holding my bag, I actually feel like I’m with him.

Chapter Two

I walk down the hall with Jason next to me.

Mel, whose turn is it to pay for a movie date? I look at him like he is kidding. He knows it’s his turn. That’s why we haven’t been to the movies in four months. Jason and I take turns taking each other out on little outings.

Really, Jay? Going there again, boo? We stop by my locker and he starts to laugh. You are the reason why I didn’t get to see the last two movies I wanted to see. You think you’re slick throwing movie nights at your house once a month. Baby, I read between those lines two months ago. He starts laughing so hard, he has tears in his eyes. I hand him a book out my locker to put inside my bag.

You got me, Melly. How about me, you, Kerri, and Terrance do a movie Friday after school?

I make a face and pout my lips. Ugh. You know you can’t take those two to the same public place and expect to stay.

It’s then that I realize that he doesn’t invite Leslie. I silently wondered why. Part of me doesn’t want to remind him, but the part of me that is really curious is winning the battle. No Leslie?

He shrugs and doesn’t show any emotions. This morning we got off to a bad start, you know? She saw us in the car and she thinks our relationship is too close for comfort. All I can do is nod my head in pretense to understand as one key word burns in my head: Relationship. I’m so used to calling it a friendship that the word takes me for a loop. I feel as though she wants me to choose between you and her, and I choose you all the time. That’s why she and I keep breaking up.

Now he officially shocks me. I didn’t think I was the reason that their relationship is on and off. I have always thought it was her bitchy selfish ways. Maybe I mean more to him than I think. I almost want to drop the subject, but I need to know more information. What if she makes you choose? I close my locker and face him.

He shrugs a little and starts smiling. If I have to choose, it’s going to always be me and you.

I can’t hide my smile, not even a little bit. He has just the right answer I need to hear. You are going to be a very single man, if that’s what you tell all your future girlfriends. And I meant those words, but I am happy knowing that.

He laughs at me and nods. Yeah, but I’m sure none of them will ever match my Melly baby.

I smile at him as we walk to my next class together.

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By the time lunch comes around, I can’t wait to update Kerri on Jason and I. I am almost sure that I am ready to reveal what is really going on in my heart. Everything that happened from the small moments in his car, until he walked me to lunch. My mind and heart been discussing the matter within the last few classes. We came up with some simple noticeable facts. One, if Jason will always choose me no matter how it effects his love life, then maybe he has some sort of hidden feelings for me. Two, we really are like two peas in a pod. Three, these dreams just will not stop coming.

When I see Kerri sitting at the table alone going through her phone, I can’t contain my happiness. I sit down across the table from her wondering where I should start.

Did you know Jason will always choose me?

She laughs and nods, Sorry, girl, it’s a text. She clears her throat and puts her phone away. He texts me telling me that this year maybe we should just be close friends. She shakes her head and gives a sarcastic laugh. This dude is going to make me go crazy. Last night he is all up in my ear telling me he wants to get back with me, and now he’s playing fucking mind games. Ugh!

I’m not sure what to say. I can see the anger in her eyes as she looks at her phone again. Un-fucking-believable, Mel! He just texted me telling me that… I sigh slightly annoyed. This is not how I saw this conversation going. She looks apologetic at me. Sorry, sweetie, I’m sure I’m being rude.

A little, but it’s just… you’re the only person I can talk to about how I feel.

She nods in agreement putting her phone away. She smiles, Besides, you didn’t tell me what he needed to talk to you about this morning. I’ve been dying to know. Did you two have the talk?

I shake my head. No. I sigh thinking about this morning when he revealed how he felt about Leslie. I’m confused, Kerri. I shrug my shoulders and realize it is a lost cause when I put the day’s details together.

Kerri sneaks a glance at her newest text and quickly text him back. She looks up at me. Well, what’s up?

He told me that he would choose me over everyone every single time, but every time Leslie comes around it’s like he’s in a trance. I don’t know when to talk to him.

She nods, thinking about my words, or her text. Her phone vibrates, and we both look at it. She grabs it quickly looking at her text message. Sorry.

I feel my phone vibrate, and I quickly glance at the screen. I smile when I seen the text is from Jason.

Melly bay u up for library after last class?

You kno.

We there :)

What are you smiling about?

I chuckle a little bit at my friend’s nosey self. She no longer cares about her own phone. Jay just sent me a text asking me if I wanted to go to the library after school. I told him yes.

She looks at me in confusion.

I guess I’m happy, because he always thinks of me, instead of Leslie. Her eyebrows raise showing signs she still doesn’t understand what makes me happy about a simple text. I roll my eyes, Don’t try to understand it, Kerri.

Kerri laughs at me. Simple things, huh?

I nod my head in agreement, With Jay, it takes nothing more.

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By the time Jay and I make it to the library after school, I convince myself to just tell him how I feel. Part of me feels like he is possibly on the same page as me. The other part feels like he is just being himself. Jason is always such a sweetheart.

I take a deep breath and prepare myself mentally for him not feeling the same way as me. Jay. I say the words so softly that he doesn’t hear me. He’s looking in his book taking notes. I clear my throat a little and try again. Jay. This time he looks at me and smiles. I can’t help, but smile back at him.

Yeah, Melly baby?

I wonder if he knows exactly what he does to me every single time he calls me Melly baby. Well, it’s time that I let him know. I clear my throat again. We need to talk.

He nods, I agree, but maybe we should wait, until later. You’re still coming over for dinner, right?

I nod silently wondering why I just can’t say the words.

Good, because my mom is making your favorite meal. Bacon cheese burgers with cheese fries.

I smile at him and hit his hand playfully. "That’s your favorite meal, boo.