Illusions: A Republic Lost

By Karen Alexander

Jessie is a young girl who enjoys the traditional southern life of a small town where faith, personal freedoms, and independence are a way of life. When she reaches the ripe old age of seventeen, the United States of America is torn and its citizens living within a total maelstrom.

She and her family experience an invasion and a new world that Jessie can hardly believe to be real. Why had no one seen this coming? Survival without the freedoms they once knew as inalienable is the dilemma and taking America Back is their goal.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Mar 13, 2013
• ISBN: 9781483600598

Book preview

Passages

Indoctrination

We are clothed in hazmat gear from head to toe. Our boots, pants, jacket, and hood are brilliant white. The edges are tucked inside waistbands and boots to prevent any virus or entity from entering our system. As we walk up a wide ramp, I realize that I do not know where we are or why we are here.

With me are my husband, Joe, and his friends from work. We go through wide double doors into an expansive lobby. I notice several men dressed completely in black and gas masks. Everyone in our group dons a mask except me. Joe walks up and places a mask over my face, smiling as he cinches the strap into place.

We are told that we have been honored with a self-guided tour of this environment. I do not understand. What is this place and is there an agenda that I do not know of? It is our first year anniversary and Joe says this trip is his gift to me. Joe is Eastern Union and I was an American. I do not trust my husband.

As we travel through the corridors, I notice that the men dressed in black are fewer and the hallways are narrower. Joe and I are in front and we are walking a little faster. The floor is carpeted now; our footsteps are softer. Joe and I break off from the group and turn down another hall toward a large set of double doors.

Joe opens the doors and we enter a cavernous room bright and light. Families sit about, adults and children. There is not a sound to be heard. The surroundings are so pristine and sterile it feels antiseptic. When persons move they are slow and robotic, except us. We walk slowly closer in, and they watch us. No one spoke. The eyes that watch us enter are dull. Their faces are vacant.

Then I see him. A young man is sitting on a stool, speaking softly to himself. He has green eyes and a brown scruff on his chin. His cheeks are sunken and the veins in his neck pulsate. Suddenly he stands up and starts toward Joe and me. First he is slow and then his pace quickens, near to running. He is unable to move as fast as he wishes and stumbles some, then slows to a walk. He opens his scrawny arms out, reaching for me. I turn to Joe and say, We are in the wrong place. Let’s turn around and leave!

Joe stands quietly and does not move. I pull on his arm and scream into his face, Run out with me, Joe. Why aren’t you moving?

Joe looks up as the man collapses at my feet, hanging on to my ankles as though his life depended on it. He nearly pulls me down on top of him. That is when I see two men in lab coats walking toward us. Sorry, Mrs. Sahib, we will take care of this. They lift the man up and reseat him on his stool. Then they return to me and take my arm. How was the trip over? one asks.

Joe responds, I have never been on this side of the command center before. The architecture reminds me of home. I would like to fly the aircraft we came in on.

You know they have communications officers on that aircraft. You might be there before you know it, the other aide said.

Why are they talking like they know each other, I think. Why do they have hold of my arm?

I am dizzy and disoriented as they pull me through another set of doors into a new hall. Quietly the man removes my gas mask and gently sits me on a gurney. As my head is laid down on the thin pillow, darkness enters my mind and I know nothing more.

2013

Mama’s eyes are what I remember. They were blue and sparkled like the stars in the sky. When Mama smiled her whole face seemed to dance. She was a busy mama, making sure that her children were safe (from what, I did not know) and happy.

So Mama painted the walls of our den yellow and cleaned the area rugs each week so that they reflected the bright sun through the window. Mama made all of the curtains in our house. Funny roosters adorned the sink window in the kitchen. Red and yellow plaid curtains emblazoned the den windows and they stood for my daddy’s Scottish heritage.

I remember my room fondly. It was pale green and had white eyelet curtains at my one window. My bed was under the window and I could look up and see the curtains billow out during the summer nights when the windows were open. Mama also lined the windows with vines that seemed to grow by themselves, and each year she trimmed them back.

Daddy made shelves in the corner of my room to hold my dolls and books. There was a built-in desk where I had paper and crayons. Each time I was happy with a picture that I had created with these tools, I made sure Mama posted it on the wall or the refrigerator. I thought pictures could help to make the house happy too.

When Mama and Daddy were too busy for me, I played in my room. I would take a blanket and pin it down with a book on my bed, then stretch it over the edge of a chair back, facing the side of my bed. Under there with the blanket draped all around, I had complete privacy to read or dream about my horses and dolls and their wonderful futures. Sometimes I would borrow a small flashlight from my daddy that I could manage to turn on or off.

If my parents needed me to watch little John or help with something, they always knew where I was.

If there was no blanket castle stationed within my bedroom walls, they knew where my best hiding place was: the closet. My closet was long and narrow, with inset corners. I could hide behind a box in the corner and never be seen. Back there with the flashlight I would draw pictures or read my books. It was a good hiding place because I could stretch out. There was a lot of room for me in my closet. I felt very safe there. Daddy says we are supposed to feel safe in our house.

On Sundays, we went to church. Our church was at a crossroads and joined by two other churches on the other corners. One was a white frame church with a red door, a bell tower, and tall clear windows. The other was a brick church and it had pointed windows and a bell tower too. Ours was made of stone, had a red door, pointed colored windows, and a bell tower. When we arrived at church all of those bell towers reverberated with the sound of their bells. Somehow they all chimed the same music: Amazing Grace.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,

That saved a wretch like me.

I once was lost but now am found,

Was blind, but now I see.

T’was Grace that taught my heart to fear.

And Grace, my fears relieved.

How precious did that Grace appear

The hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares

I have already come;

’Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home.

Daddy would chuckle, People always think that the Baptists wrote that song, but it was written by an Episcopalian.

That is what we are, Daddy, episcapayans? I said.

They would both laugh then and I felt good because I could see them smile.

When I went to the front of the church where the priest stood I was proud. I would kneel on the cushion between Mama, who was holding little John, and Daddy. The priest would place his hands on my head and pray a soft blessing, ending with, "In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost." In church we prayed for the people of our town, Taylorsville, the mayor, the governor, and our president. We prayed for their wisdom to know the right things to do to preserve our country and its people. No matter what was happening in our world these prayers were made each Sunday. There were three flags on the lawn, the Episcopal flag, the State of North Carolina flag, and the United States flag. No one would dare to think any of those flags should be taken down.

On the side of our church there was a courtyard. There, I and other kids would play in the middle of the courtyard, hiding between hedges and under flowering bushes. We took care not to step in the beds where the flowers bloomed. One time I took a flower to Mama, and she smiled but told me that we are not to pick flowers out of the churchyard because they were there to make the church a happy place.

That’s when I understood what my mama was trying to do. She had to keep the house happy, because each day when Daddy came home from his work he was not happy. His face held wrinkles of concern and his mouth was straight; his hair had sprinkles of gray. He would quietly sit in the dark until he finally turned on the light and the television set. Then I would go in and sit on his lap. He would hold me and say nothing.

After a little while, Mama would bring in little John, my baby brother, and place him in Daddy’s arms. I would sit beside Daddy’s chair and look at my books, not saying a word. I waited for daddy to let me know that he would like me in his lap again.

One night when little John and Mama had gone back to the bedrooms, Daddy patted his knee and I crawled up into his lap. Well, Jessie girl, what did you do today? Daddy seemed to relish my childish stories.

We made you a daddy reward!

Which kind? he asked.

German crunch cookies, I replied.

May I have my reward now? he asked.

With that request I toddled into the kitchen, where the plate of warm cookies lay, took a napkin and two cookies back to Daddy.

Then I told him the cooking story.

First Mama measured out all the things that she puts in the cookies. Then I placed everything into the bowl. Mama used the beaters to make the batter creamy, and then we added the flour. It got in my hair. Then Mama put flour on her face and mine. We laughed. We added nuts and dropped the batter on the cookie sheet. I helped Mama clean up, and then I took my bath. Mama said there was more flour on me than in the cookies!

That made Daddy laugh, and he seemed to loosen up some, saying to me, Jessie girl, you are like your mama, always trying to make me laugh. I want you to make me a promise, you hear?

Yes, Daddy

If I tell you to hide, you hide right away in your closet without the flashlight. If I tell you to take your brother to the closet with you, you must keep him as quiet as you can. You must be brave, Jessie girl.

I promise, Daddy.

I was a serious little girl and took my promises seriously, and because of that I paid closer attention to Daddy’s words. I knew he was worried about something and I wanted to help. A few weeks later I heard words that I would hear again and again.

Daddy came home on Friday night and asked Mama for a drink and sat at the kitchen table. Mama was feeding little John and I sat at the table as well. Daddy began to talk in a low, steady voice.

Girls, it appears that deficit spending has gotten our country into major hock with other countries in the world. They reported that our nation was in debt by $16 trillion. Steve and I have been talking about what we could do if there is a financial collapse. It made sense to me that we should save cash, buy gold, and keep as little in the bank as possible. Our house and cars are paid for and that’s good. We need to start a garden too. Food will likely become very expensive. And, Claire, we should preserve as much food as we can, canning it and stuff, don’t you think?

Clay, do you really think it will come to all this?

I do. Here is the bad news. Allan Jessup lost his pension. The government has taken all bank pensions.

Oh, that is terrible news. What will they do? How can he retire now? You know he has some health issues. How can the government do that legally?

They used some little enforced Federal Reserve clause. They called in money due for the reserves.

Should we visit them tomorrow? Maybe we should take dinner to them.

I think his son and daughter-in-law will be there tomorrow. I’ll talk to him after church on Sunday. I’m sure they will need help. The church vestry will have to make plans to help folks like the Jessups. I will bring it up at the next meeting. What do you think about our preparations? Something similar could very well happen to us.

I’m with you. We can all work in the garden. I can preserve the food, but it’s time consuming. I may need help, because little John needs so much attention.

What do you think about the girl, Robin, who is a part of the ‘Room at the Inn’ program? You and Jessie seem to like her. I think that we should take some of these folks into our homes and they can help us prepare. They will become part of our family, so we protect and help them all we can. It would be up to Robin, of course, and we would have to make sure the vestry is okay with some of us taking them into our families.

That is a great idea. If we can bring her home, I think we can do the things you suggested. I think she understands the problems we have in our country and feels about them the way we do. Robin will be a good addition to our family.

I was sitting at the table, listening to the words my daddy spoke. I did not understand them then. I knew he was worried and that Mama was willing to do anything he wanted. I turned my face up to Mama and said, So I will have a big sister?

What do you think about having Robin live with us, Jessie?

Will she be able to play with me sometimes?

She smiled at me and then looked up at Daddy. How can we fail with a kid like this one?

Mama hugged me and we went to the bathroom for my bath. Mama let me have pink bubbles as a reward for wanting Robin and listening quietly to adults talk. After my bath, we went into my bedroom and said my nightly prayers before I snuggled down under the handmade comforter that Mama had made for my bed.

Jessie, remember that we are not alone in all of this. We have our faith in God and his guardian angels. If we all work together we can make things work just right; you’ll see, and Mama kissed me on my forehead