Crooked Crusader: Morally Impaired

By Chinmoy Hazarika

Is being bad really that bad? What if something good comes out of it?

Pranay is the only son of urban middle-class parents. Since childhood, he has never had any real friends, owing to a boarding school education that kept him shuttling between home and school. A mediocre student at best, his life takes a turnaround when he is sent to study dentistry in a never-heard-of Dental College in South India. It is here that he discovers that he has skills that he never knew he had.

The story is one of a young sociopathic adult in an alien environment, battling and manipulating the odds in his favour and eradicating the ragging menace from his new homeDental College. He strives to be the boss in his banana-republic of a hostel. This is a simple and relatable story that delves into the murky world of ragging in hostels and how the megalomaniac protagonist turns it to his own gain.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing India
• Release date: Dec 11, 2015
• ISBN: 9781482867800

Chinmoy Hazarika

Dr. Chinmoy Hazarika is a practising dentist. He lives in India with his family. When not pulling out teeth, performing root-canals and filling cavities, he spends most of his time writing for children and young adults. This is his first published novel.

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Copyright © 2015 by Chinmoy Hazarika.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

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Contents

A Word

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

PLAN B

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

OPERATION COMEBACK

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

THE RED-HANDED AFFAIR

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

An Extra Chapter

Epilogue

A WORD

M any among us think that dentistry is all about pulling out teeth and appearing in toothpaste commercials and hence, are very gravely mistaken. It has so much in store for the suffering victim of a toothache or badly aligned teeth, other than a hefty treatment cost or the feeling of being ripped off.

Many would find it difficult to agree that dentists don’t happen to be gold-diggers just for kicks. The fact of the matter is, they become so maybe out of compulsion after years of slogging it out at their respective Dental Colleges and after facing heaps of hard work and humiliation (both from superiors as well as case-subjects/patients). Without exception, every budding dentist has to go through hell and then some more. After all the proverbial cloud should have a silver lining, isn’t it?

To become a dentist is not that simple. Nor would it be far-fetched to say you could become one, provided you have it in you to rough it out in an alien environment and you have a passion for it….and if you do not mind spending a fortune in fees for the five-year Dental course (Bachelor of Dental Surgery or B.D.S for short) and sundry expenses. Dental education in a private college in India is expensive; it is a well-known fact.

You see, in India, we have a well-oiled system of jugaad or a system of short-cuts that helps one achieve a certain end without having to work much for it. It is a much accepted (by some and not by others) way of getting things done.

In the same way, you can become a dentist by two methods. 1) Study hard and clear the competitive entrance examinations. 2) Get admitted to a lesser known private college after paying a hefty capitation fees in the management quota.

Most students prefer to try their luck in the entrance examinations in the hope that they would get into the course, and if unsuccessful in doing so, only then resort to the alternative. These private colleges make crores of rupees each session. Although the means of admission are at times nefarious, it would not be unfair to say that these colleges have helped students a great deal. Once the students get into the course (Bachelor of Dental Surgery) it is up to them to study and clear the examinations while being at par with those who got into it by clearing Entrance Examinations. Not only do these colleges help students in getting admitted to the course of their choice, they also help in creating more dental professionals to help bridge the gap in the dentist-to-population ratio. At present the dentist-to-population ratio in India is about 1: 30,000, according to sources; very low by global standards.

This story is a light-hearted attempt at bringing to light the various events that constitute campus life in a Dental College. Most instances are of course imaginary or borrowed. Almost all the characters, people and places mentioned are figments of my overactive imagination. Most of them are caricatures and stereotypes that are based on people who I observed on a daily basis in and around me.

Crooked Pronunciation: /’krʊkɪd/

Definition of crooked

adjective (crookeder, crookedest)

• 1  bent or twisted out of shape or out of place:his teeth were yellow and crooked

• 2  informal dishonest; illegal: a crooked business deal

• 3  (usually crooked on) Australian/NZinformal annoyed; exasperated:‘It’s not you I’m crooked on,’ he assured Vivien

[1940s: from the phrase go crook ‹become angry›]

Origin:

Middle English: from CROOK, probably modelled on Old Norse krókóttr ‘crooked, cunning’

Crusader Pronunciation: /kruː’seɪdə/

Definition of crusader

noun

• 1  (Crusader) a fighter in the medieval Crusades.

• 2  a person who campaigns vigorously for political, social, or religious change; a campaigner: crusaders forearly detection and treatment of mental illnesses

- oxforddictionaries.com

CHAPTER 1

W hen I was home one summer after finishing my class 8 th annual examinations, my parents took me aside for a little family talk. That talk turned out to be a half-hour lecture on adolescent life, responsibility, the importance of choosing a career and, most importantly, sticking to it. It was only when my mother saw me scratching my head, did she asked me the inevitable question.

"Beta, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

Her words carried so much emotion that I thought she would cry if I did not answer instantly.

A doctor! I declared. Mother let out a deep sigh.

Good choice, son! You will fulfill your mother’s dream. You know? I wanted to be a doctor too….but your grandfather was too naïve; he thought that girls were supposed to be only nurses, and that only boys became doctors.

I could hardly stifle the laughter building its way up from inside but somehow, I managed to control my emotions when I saw my mother’s eyes well up with tears.

The main reason that I wanted to be a doctor was that I hated mathematics. In fact, I hated anything associated with numbers. Therefore I had to make do with whatever limited choices I had- 1) take SCIENCE stream with biology, 2) take ARTS stream, and 3) take up COMMERCE stream. Taking the last two did not make much sense because I loved science as a subject.

So, in class 11th, SCIENCE it was. But the real dilemma was that there was a slot open for a fifth subject, the other four being English, Physics, Chemistry and Biology. I could take Computer Sciences, Economics, Language, and Physical Education or (ugh!!) Mathematics. Computer sciences were not in my career league. Economics had nothing to do with science. I sucked at sports. So, I stuck with Mathematics, or should I say, Mathematics stuck to me like an irritating piece of sello-tape. I somehow had got the feeling that this stupid subject would spell the doom of me.

In the meantime, at my parents’ advice, I joined a coaching institute to prepare for competitive medical entrance examinations which would provide classes for the next two years in PHYSICS, CHEMISTRY & BIOLOGY. The correspondence materials were good, I must say. The con was, they would provide you with all the reading material and you had to study all by yourself. But you had to visit the learning centre every weekend for course refreshment and the weekly tests which were in the same pattern as that of an entrance test. All in all, you study but they help you prepare. After all, thirty-five thousand rupees as fees is not a joke.

Somehow I passed class 11th with grace marks. The school curricular course had no similarity whatsoever with what we were being taught in coaching, so I found it difficult to correlate what we were taught in coaching to what we were taught in class.

MATHEMATICS had become a long-neglected and long-forgotten subject. Also, I really hated the subjective evaluation of our answer sheets. SCIENCE was meant to be objective, isn’t it? I could calculate numerical problems from physics and chemistry in a jiffy because they were practical, to begin with. I had already accepted the fact that MATHEMATICS was something that I had to deal with……very severely. That meant I had to think of a way to bypass this numerical demon, or else I would surely flunk. I tried telling my parents, but they wouldn’t understand.

"Beta, I know MATHEMATICS in SCIENCE stream is more difficult. Try harder!" my father would say.

"But how?" I wanted to scream.

But how?

I appeared for the class 12th board exams the next year. Finishing the exams felt as if a big load had been lifted off my chest. I went home for the holidays (I studied in a boarding school). My parents were sure that I would flunk in MATHEMATICS and that I would have to sit for a re-exam.

But they were astounded to see my results. I had scored a whopping 79/100 in MATHEMATICS. My parents did not say much but I could sense the puzzle-mixed-with-disappointment look on their faces.

My mother took me aside, just like she had, four years ago.

"Beta, you sure you scored those 79 marks on your own? Or did u get someone’s help in doing so?"

I looked into her stern face.

"Ma, I helped myself get those marks. I deserve every single mark. And I think I deserve a little trust from you for putting in my efforts and getting paid for my hard work."

Mother was taken aback. After all, she wasn’t used to being talked back. Father sensed the situation and stepped in.

Tell me son, how did you did it? It was only 3 days before the exam that you were saying that you will not appear for MATHS exam. What brought about this change? Please tell us. We are worried.

Now was my chance to showcase my legendary brilliance. I stood tall as I spoke.

"Father, you know how difficult it is to clear Mathematics in class 12th, that too when you and the subject don’t happen to agree with each other. And the fact that Commerce students do not have to undergo the same rigorous rattafication in Calculus & Differentiation formulae like us from the Science stream, doesn’t help matters at all. Their Mathematics is much easier, more application-based and practical. They have income tax calculation, statistics, and coordinate geometry to worry about while we have to grapple with imaginary complex calculations at the end of which we have to prove that we had been right all along!! You know what? According to me, that brand of Mathematics comes under a separate category altogether. I call it Abstract Mathematics, where the figures change every time you look at them from a new angle! Different people seem to have different opinions about it, just like in abstract art."

Father stared at me as if I had just bombed the Taj Mahal, Mathematics being his favourite subject. He had an M.sc in Mathematics but had somehow ended up as an employee in a nationalized bank.

I continued, nonchalantly.

And so, I found an ingenious way to circumnavigate this nonsense, once and for all! You see, the CBSE has divided the Mathematics question paper into 3 sections in such a way that Science students can attempt section A and section B, while Commerce students can attempt Section A and section C. Section C has questions from commercial topics in them. Comparatively, Commerce students have it easy. Here is the fun part. I, though belonging to the Science stream, attempted the sections A and C. I found it very easy and now you can see the results for yourself. Hehehehe!!

Father was wide-eyed. So was Mother.

That was a huge risk!! What if you would have been caught?

To tell the truth, I had to take the risk, or I would have lost one subject. You see, actually I have exploited a loophole in the Board Exam Regulations. Since our names and roll numbers remain hidden from the examiners, they wouldn’t know whose answer sheets they were checking, SCIENCE or COMMERCE. Further, even the data operators who fed the results for uploading would not bother re-checking the marks granted to each student or whether they belonged to SCIENCE or COMMERCE. And therefore, my gamble paid off!!! Yay!!

Father remained speechless that night.

CHAPTER 2

N ext came the volley of medical entrance exams that I had to appear for. To tell the truth, I was not an exceptionally bright student, but I could make my way out some way or the other. Appearing for the entrances was the only logical choice I had. I cursed the day I told my mother that I wanted to become a doctor. I cursed the day I took Science.

The week after the results were announced, was spent in appearing for the competitive exams.

All India Pre-medical test (AIPMT).

AIIMS-CET

JIPMER-Pondicherry

Indraprastha University PMT.

AFMC-Pune

Delhi PMT.

Assam CET.

COMED-K.

CMC- Vellore.

But the problem was that all of these exams were not in the same city. Since I was in the hope that I would clear at least one of the above, I had to travel all over the country in order to appear for all of them, sometimes against my parents’ wishes.

So one day I would have to be in Guwahati, the next day would be spent in New Delhi. Sometimes, after finishing one exam in Chennai, I would take an auto from the examination centre for the airport to catch a flight to Delhi for yet another examination the next morning.

Once, I happened to miss my flight from Bangalore to Guwahati after my cab got stuck in a traffic jam in the heart of the city. When I reached the airport, I came to know that my flight had already taken off. I was so crestfallen that I started crying, right outside the entry gate.

Many curious onlookers kept throwing glances at me but when I would look back at them with helpless eyes, they would politely look away. I just kept weeping silently.

Why couldn’t have the damned cabwalla driven a little faster? What am I gonna do now? I am doomed!!

After what seemed like an eternity, a girly voice broke the monotony of the airport humdrum.

May I help you? Are you alone?

I looked up and saw a petite girl in a red shirt, red trousers and a red cap looking down at me with concern. Kingfisher staff.

Are you alright? Do you need anything?

I just need to get on a plane to Guwahati ASAP. I have this important examination tomorrow. My life depends on it. Please help me.

Ok, alright. Calm down. See, the last flight to Guwahati left about fifteen minutes ago. But let me see what I can do. You can let go of my hand now

I looked down. I was clasping her hand so tightly that surely her fingers would have lost their circulation had I not let go. A few people were looking at us with bemused smiles on their faces.

Please help me out. I have to be in Guwahati at 10am tomorrow. Can’t you do something?

She studied the despair on my face for a long time.

Well, come with me

She helped me to my feet, took my hand and took me to a Kingfisher booth. I watched her face eagerly as she pored over her PC console.

Well, you are in luck. We have flight for Guwahati at 0530hrs tomorrow.

Oh thank you so much!!! Could you put me on that flight?

Sure! Definitely. The ticket would be eight thousand five hundred and ninety.

Excuse me??!!

You heard me dear. Eight, five, nine zero. Only.

What do you mean ‘only’? I have only three thousand bucks with me! Oh God! What am I gonna do now? This time I wailed.

She looked around indecisively, while torrents of tears flowed down my cheeks like the Ganga and the Brahmaputra to finally meet at my chin. Finally, she came around from behind the booth.

Well there is another way. I will pay for your ticket.

What?! I stared at her incredulously.

You heard me. I will pay for your ticket, but you must promise to pay me back as soon as possible. This is my salary I am paying you from, mind you.

I was dumbfounded.

How….why….how…? was all I could blabber.

Oh c’mon! You are in distress. You must appear for your test. You will pay me back, won’t you?

Yes yes, of course. But you are going out of your way to help me out, I don’t understand.

Ok. You can stay here as long as you want. If you don’t like me helping you, why did you ask for it in the first place? There was a hint of annoyance in her voice.

No no. That is perfectly fine with me. One is not used to being helped by friendly strangers like you. You are an angel. I smiled for the first time that day.

Oh c’mon. It’s nothing like that. I like helping people. And you don’t get to do that often in this thankless job of mine, isn’t it?

But how am I going to repay you?

Take my name and contact number, along with my bank account number. Just deposit the amount and then call me to confirm. Simple.

I thanked her profusely and left the booth window to enter the airport building. I made my way to the waiting area. I bought a sandwich and a coke from one of the numerous stalls that lined the furthest wall of the waiting area, found a row of plush chairs near the security check-in and settled there with my luggage for the night.

I observed the scene around me. The daily multitude of commuters was slowly trickling down to countable numbers. The LCD TV screens were airing news channels but they were muted, so they were not serving much purpose. Somewhere, a loudspeaker was announcing the arriving and departing of various domestic flights.

Ah! Only if I reach Guwahati tomorrow on time……..what if I don’t reach the exam centre on time?…….. What would have happened if that nice girl would not have helped me… what if……….

Hi! Get up! Don’t you have an exam tomorrow?

I woke up to find that I had dozed off. I checked my watch. I had been asleep for two hours now. The crowd had already disappeared, save a few airline staffers here and there, and some passengers.

I looked around to see