Break Free from Harmful Thoughts: Find Purpose and Continuous Joy, Peace, and Freedom

By Darlene Faye Andrews

As you uncover thoughts and behaviors that hinder you from being your best self, you will learn to overcome them and guard the entrance ways to your heart and mind. You will learn how to speak words consistent with what you want in life and watch your relationships, finances, career, and other areas of your life change for the better.

By applying fundamental biblical practices, you will learn to live above your circumstances every day. Letting go of old thinking and ways of doing things will empower you to live the life you desire.

By focusing on who God created you to be and what Jesus Christ has already done for you as a Christian, you will learn to be authentic and express yourself regardless of who is present.

When you apply my breaking free process to your life, you will tap into Gods blessing flow and live a purposeful, abundant life.

Regardless of your family history or your past and current life experiences, God has a plan for your life, and it includes you being free from all harmful thoughts and living a life of continuous joy and peace that can be shared freely with others.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Nov 6, 2014
• ISBN: 9781490856834

Darlene Faye Andrews

Darlene Faye Andrews is an author, speaker, and founder of Faithfully and Wonderfully Made LLC. As a trainer and certified life coach, she encourages people to manage their lives based on Gods Word. She has a masters in Organizational Leadership from Nyack College and is a native of Washington, DC.

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Copyright © 2014 Darlene Faye Andrews.

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Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1979, 1980, 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc.

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Scripture quotations taken from Amplified Bible. Copyright © 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation.

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Scriptures taken from the Holy Bible, New International Versions. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved. The NIV and New International Version trademarks are registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by International Bible Society. Use of either trademark requires the permission of International Bible Society.

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Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

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ISBN: 978-1-4908-5684-1 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-5685-8 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-5683-4 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2014918403

WestBow Press rev. date: 11/03/2014

CONTENTS

Dedication

Acknowledgments

Introduction

Part I: Awaken the Mind

Chapter 1 The Wakeup Call

Chapter 2 Uncovering the Deceptions

Chapter 3 The Conflict between Two Kingdoms

Chapter 4 Power to Overcome Deceptions

Chapter 5 Fundamentals of a Free Life

Part II: Developing a Freedom Mind-Set

Chapter 6 Receive the Gift of Freedom

Chapter 7 Shut the Door to the Old

Chapter 8 Establish New Boundaries

Chapter 9 Develop a Biblical View of Life

Chapter 10 Build Character

Chapter 11 Build Resilience to Tests and Trials

Chapter 12 Serve with Joy

Part III: Living Free

Chapter 13 Live a Kingdom of God Lifestyle

Chapter 14 Leave a Legacy

References

About the Author

DEDICATION

To my dearest heavenly Father,

Who is the love of my life,

The breath that I breathe,

The beat of my heart, and

The anchor of my soul.

I adore you, Father.

Thank you for the privilege of being your child!

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I appreciate the talent and commitment of Ann McIndoo and Mishael Patton of So You Want to Write. Their help was invaluable. Words cannot express how grateful I am for their assistance. Ann’s writing technology worked seamlessly and Mishael’s guidance, constructive feedback, and encouragement made a challenging task very exciting and fulfilling. I learned so much from their rigorous support. They provided exactly what I needed to write this book.

Thank you, ladies!

When they say it takes a village, it’s true in my case. I want to personally thank Kenneth and Gloria Copeland for their late night Christian television programs that lifted me when I was drowning in doubt and confusion. Their consistent teachings on the love of God and the power of His spoken Word led me to the path of Christian maturity.

I acknowledge the transformational teachings of Dr. Bill Winston on the kingdom of God. Dr. Winston’s powerful description of my rights and privileges as a kingdom citizen caused a paradigm shift in my thoughts; I will never be the same.

I’m thankful for Dr. Creflo Dollar’s ability to deliver the Word in practical, simplicity so I could apply it immediately to my life. His sermon on Intensive Consistent Obedience greatly influenced my life; I was able to restore relationships, find my purpose, and surrender to God.

Bishop T.D. Jakes was my TV pastor for several years before I found a church home. I’m so appreciative of his teachings, and commitment to Christians being their best selves outside the church, where most of us spend our time. I thank him for teaching me how to be a leading lady and how to communicate the Word in the workplace so anyone can hear and understand it.

I want to also thank Mrs. Joyce Meyer who wrote one of the best Christian books, Battlefield of the Mind Devotional. Your book started me on the road to breaking free from harmful thoughts.

Special thanks and appreciation goes to my pastors, Drs. Michael and Dee Dee Freedom, whose teachings, love, and uncompromising faith have kept me grounded in the Word. Thank you both, for hard work, and dedication to the body of Christ.

I’m grateful for all these precious men and women.

INTRODUCTION

A dream is a gift from heaven. It’s the fuel that gives life momentum. However, for many years, it was normal for me to have dreams and work on jobs not affiliated with them. I needed to pay bills, and I was always told that having big dreams meant you had lofty ambitions. Since I wanted to be accepted and fit in with my peers, I buried my dreams and went on with my life, following the majority. After all, this was what most people did.

Overcoming deceptive yet well-known poetic and sometimes crippling messages spoken and taught to me over the years was my biggest challenge. All these imprints have not been totally uncovered and dissolved; it will take a lifetime to do that. Learning to manage your thoughts, especially when you go after your dreams, requires stamina. It takes endurance to move beyond past wounds as they scrape against the walls of your comfort zone. As you learn to embrace life while feeling these discomforts, glimpses of hope will shine through your heart. The hope will open your eyes to lighted pathways that bring you pleasure, and slowly, your essence will be released as you explore higher levels of knowledge and expose yourself to facets of your dreams.

For many years, I struggled to please God and fit into the world’s way of doing things. Then I discovered a life of spiritual freedom and congruency. When I open my eyes each morning, my freedom gives me the opportunity to choose to live an exciting and fulfilling life. Experience has taught me that not everyone makes this choice each day. Even though many of us are educated, savvy, and smart, we allow life-changing opportunities to be overlooked throughout our days. We are constantly bombarded with requests, unrealistic expectations, obligations, and lots of information, some of which are well packaged but repetitive and meaningless. We find ourselves sifting through numerous documents and websites to formulate our responses to life and find relevant ideas and solutions hidden away like diamonds in the earth’s mantle.

We’re expected to keep up with the latest information about our careers, our employers or businesses, stay connected on social media, take care of our mates, keep up with the kids, keep our houses clean, maintain our cars, boats, and other toys, keep up with what’s happening with our friends and relatives, show up at the right places with the right people, look good, and be politically correct regardless of our unfulfilled needs.

While we keep all these balls in the air, we’re prone to ignore the invisible limitations we place on ourselves and others. We adopt fears and unconsciously accept the injustices that surround us. Good and bad experiences happen to us all; however, we have the ability to choose to seek out truth or remain in darkness. We can choose to grow or stay small, step out in faith or shrink backward, forgive or become bitter, surrender or be rebellious.

I chose to break free from some limiting beliefs that kept me on the roller-coaster of life. They picked me up and dropped me off at the same spot repeatedly. It felt comfortable riding the roller-coaster. Sometimes, I looked good riding the monstrosity, but when I would temporarily step off the ride, a feeling of freedom and excitement would linger for a little while but it would gradually fade away. During one moment of stepping off the roller-coaster, I realized the behavior patterns I had created for survival were preventing me from fully expressing who I really was, and they limited my ability to enjoy life, and share my gifts and talents in meaningful, fulfilling ways. My life was on automatic pilot.

In this book, I share how I uncovered several key deceptions that were hindering me from finding purpose and joy in my life. Once my eyes were opened, I implemented some steps that today help me stay free. This is my story and the lessons I have learned along the way; it’s written from a Christian perspective. If you aren’t a Christian, I believe you’ll still find value in reading this book because the processes will work for anyone. I’m not a theologian, or a bible scholar, or a therapist or psychologist. I’m an ordinary woman who through many challenges and breakthroughs discovered there is much more to being a Christian than receiving initial salvation. Through the power of the Holy Spirit and by taking responsibility for my life, I found the strength and wisdom I needed to pursue the life God designed for me. We all have dreams, but some of us have buried them so deep inside our hearts that we might not remember we once had them.

There’s no such thing as a trouble-free life, and mine isn’t free of challenges. But the biggest difference between my life before and now is that I no longer tolerate thoughts, words, or actions that are inconsistent with who I am and what I plan to achieve. I have to fight every day on the battlefield of thoughts and spoken words. However, the battle is worth it because through strategic efforts, I consistently kill off feelings of fear and guilt and keep the victim mentality under control. It gives me strength to not rely on what everybody is doing and on circumstances to be perfect before I move forward on what I believe. Being a soldier on this battlefield is exciting because God is the general and military strategist; I am a captain who receives regular orders on how and where to step in a battle that has already been won.

My heart aches for some members of the body of Christ who suffer daily from invisible bondages and who aren’t enjoying the life Christ suffered and died to give them. Christ died for us so we could have full, abundant, and overflowing lives. Unfortunately, there’s not a lot of difference between the lives most Christians live and the way non-Christians live today, but it doesn’t have to be that way. God has made a better way for us. I’m sharing my story and my breaking-free process to help you identify and overcome the limiting thoughts in your life. I want to encourage you to open your mind and take the journey to discover the wisdom and freedom that already exist in you. I want you to live the life you were born to live. That life is lying dormant, waiting for you to wake it up, take the reins, and soar.

This book is divided into three parts. In the first part, Awaken the Mind, I share my story and some key deceptions that hide in the fabric of our lives. I explain the ongoing conflict between two kingdoms and how losing sight of that conflict can cause devastating consequences for a Christian. I also share how I received the power to overcome deceptions and the fundamental practices I use daily to live above my circumstances.

Staying free is a lifelong process that takes a serious commitment. Some people have received powerful revelations about areas of their lives and immediately stopped drinking or gave up drugs, pornography, broke up with a lover, or stopped stealing, lying, and so on. However, these are rare events; the majority of us will go through a process of making quality decisions to change the circumstances in our lives, and by consistently applying appropriate actions, we will receive our desired results.

In the second part, Developing a Freedom Mind-Set, I share the processes I used to find joy, peace, and freedom. I do these same things today to maintain my freedom. My process started with applying two key actions to my life; first, I received the gift of freedom Jesus Christ gave us, and second, I put the Word of God first place in my life. By letting go of old ways of thinking and doing things, you can clearly see your true self and the numerous possibilities hidden under life’s clutter. By establishing new boundaries, strengthening your character, and building resilience to life’s tests and trials, you can have a solid foundation on which to stand regardless of what goes on around you. Through serving God and others, you can tap into a continuous flow of joy and peace.

The third part, Living Free, describes the importance of continuous growth and development as a kingdom of God citizen. Making the full shift into a life depending on God’s way of doing things is living life by faith and being committed to following Jesus Christ. Everyone will leave a legacy; the question is whether yours will have a positive or negative influence on the world.

I hope this book will inspire you to take the steps you need to achieve freedom from the world’s seductions and deceptions. My desire is for you to live the life God planned for you before you were formed in your mother’s womb. Your freedom will impact not only you but also the lives of everyone around you.

PART I

Awaken the Mind

CHAPTER 1

The Wakeup Call

But thanks be to God, Who in Christ always leads us in triumph [as trophies of Christ’s victory] and through us spreads and makes evident the fragrance of the knowledge of God everywhere.

—2 Corinthians 2:14 Amplified Bible

My Story

I didn’t want to get out of bed. I knew the day would bring challenges and confrontations I didn’t have the energy or desire to handle. As I lay between the sheets, wishing it was Saturday or I was on vacation in the Bahamas, the alarm clock went off with the sweet sound of Céline Dion. The music made me smile until I began to rehearse in my mind the conversations I needed to have in just a few hours. I threw back the covers and placed my feet firmly on the floor as if I were preparing to do a broad jump. I hung my head and took several deep breaths. I spoke words of encouragement to myself and jumped in the shower.

A few months earlier, I had been appointed to lead an initiative to create a professional development program for my company. I was extremely excited about the new opportunity; I loved talking about personal and professional development and skill-building opportunities that helped people grow and perform at their best. The new assignment took me away from the normal project management and new business development work, which I was happy to leave for a while. This new, high-profile role would also give me the opportunity to learn, create, and teach something new to everyone in the company. It was the best fit for me since a long-term assignment in Cairo, Egypt, three years earlier.

The professional development assignment started off with lots of excitement and employee involvement. We had so many volunteers that I had more than enough people to form an oversight committee, various focus groups, and several working groups. It felt wonderful to work on something everyone desired, valued, and considered important for the company’s growth.

Now, we were well beyond the initial launch phase; we were at the resistance phase. The infatuation had worn off, and employees were realizing the new program would require changes. Some pushback was expected, but the amount of pushback we were experiencing seemed enormous. I was burdened by the amount of disagreement some employees were expressing.

Looking back, I realize the pushback triggered memories of rejection I had experienced much earlier in my life. The employees were not rejecting me; they feared the unknown, the future changes, and