All Kinds of Crazy

By Avis P. Raines

All Kinds of Crazy is a book about five girlfriends experiencing everyday life. Its a book that all women can relate to. At some point and time life is just that, All Kinds of Crazy. These girlfriends are trying to keep their head above water dealing with everyday challenges, situations, scenarios, problems, etc. Always offering one another advice, but cant seem to find a single solution for their own situations. The least they can do is be there for one another while going through rough times, because thats what girlfriends do. Some situations we have control of and others we just have to let the chips fall where they may. But in any case, its nice having girlfriends in your corner. Having someone there that can relate to what youre going through. As women we take a lot and we go through so much. Dont get me wrong, we can give a lot too, but most of the time we end up with the shorter end of the stick. So with that being said; this book is about owning up to the choices you make in life and the choices that life gives you. Life may not always go according to plan, but plan to make the best of it.
Why worry about the Outlook, when you know who has control of the Outcome Avis P. Raines

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Apr 9, 2014
• ISBN: 9781496902436

Avis P. Raines

Avis is an amazing author with an eccentric style of writing. She invades your heart and your mind as she takes you through a maze of emotions while painting a vivid picture of the characters depicted in her books. She draws you in and makes you feel as if you’re right there in the thick of things. Chapter after chapter she leaves you wanting more. The Miami Native has done it again publishing her fifth book. So, get ready to laugh, cry, and enjoy yourself with this latest read from an amazing author that is sure to entertain you while engaging you in an illusional world of characters that come to life with every word written.

Book preview

All Kinds of Crazy

Avis P. Raines

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AuthorHouse™ LLC

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Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

©

2014 Avis P. Raines. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 04/05/2014

ISBN: 978-1-4969-0242-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4969-0243-6 (e)

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

A Friend

Someone to share your secrets with, who will never tell

Someone who knows all about you and you know them as well

Someone who will be there for you no matter the situation

Someone who will come to your rescue without hesitation

Someone who sees you for who you are and not what you have

Someone who cries with you and whom with you can laugh

Someone who understands you, when no one else does

Someone who will reach out to you and give that much needed love

Someone who will tell you the truth, whether it hurts you or not

Someone who you will find that you can confide in a lot

Someone who you can depend on to help you protect your heart

Someone to help you pick up the pieces when things are falling apart

Someone who will give you their last and always be at your side

Someone who will encourage you after you’ve failed to give it another try

Someone who you feel comfortable with talking to about anything

Someone who will try their hardest to see that you fulfill your dreams

Someone who is always willing to stick there neck out for you

Someone to be that extra support in whatever you choose to do

Someone you will always be close with even if you’re miles apart

Someone who will always have your best interest at heart

Someone that when you feel joy they feel exactly the same

Someone when you feel down in the dumps they can feel your pain

Someone who will be there for you when times get a little rough

Someone who will carry the load for you when you’ve had enough

Someone who will go above and beyond with you, that extra yard

Someone who will tell you to put all your faith and trust in GOD

I want to thank my family and friends for always being there for me.

TO:

_____________________________

FROM:

_____________________________

DATE:

_____________________________

MESSAGE

_____________________________

_____________________________

_____________________________

_____________________________

_____________________________

_____________________________

_____________________________

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Why worry about the Outlook when you know who has control of the Outcome—Avis P. Raines

Janine, Grace, Laura, Nikki, and I (Claire) have been friends for as long as I can remember. We loved to hang out with one another as kids and we still do as adults. We all have our own lives.

Janine is a paralegal. She has a heart of gold and she’s a fashion guru. She has a lazy bum of a husband James; that she’s head over heels for. He treats her any kind of way. He cheats and beats on her too. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve taken turns at her house covering a bruise with make-up. She says that she wants to keep her family together and that she stays for the sake of their two year old daughter Essence.

Grace is a spoiled rich kid. She drives a Jaguar and has a beautiful home. She recently finished law school, but refuses to take the bar exam for some reason. Her parents are millionaires. She’s the adventurous one. She likes to explore and take on the unknown. She doesn’t know whether she wants to be with a man or a woman. We always tell her that women cause just as many problems as men and she should know this, being a woman herself. We don’t care about her sexual preference, we just want her to find someone and settle down.

Laura, well let’s just say Laura is something else. She sleeps with other women men. She got dogged so badly by her ex-husband/daughter’s father Jonathan, so her motto is She gets paid, not played. Jonathan has since remarried and has another child. Laura doesn’t work anywhere. She lives off alimony and child support. She has a degree in accounting, but she won’t use it. We’ve already told her that what she’s doing is going to come back to haunt her one day. Some deranged wife or girlfriend is going to give her exactly what she’s looking for. She has a seven-teen year old daughter Lindsey that’s as good as they come. She’s gets excellent grades and is always getting some type of award. We tell Laura all the time to be careful, she’s got a young pair of eyes watching.

Nikki’s a customer service manager. She recently got saved and she says it’s the best thing that ever happened to her. She’s been through a lot. She was a single mom who recently lost her only child Brice six months ago to a tragic hit and run accident. They never found the suspect nor the car involved in the accident. We’re all happy that she found some light in a dark situation, but we’d be even happier if she would stop trying to push it off on us. I mean, we’re no saints, but we’re no devils either, but to each’s own. I guess she just wants us to straighten up and fly right.

As for me, I have my degree in Business Administration. I opened up my own little gift shop about six years ago called Last Minute Gifts. It’s doing pretty well. See, I just got out of a four year relationship that wasn’t going anywhere. It was a complete dead end. He didn’t want this and he didn’t want that. Basically he wanted a sex partner and I accommodated him, but no more. I basically gave him an ultimatum. I’m sorry, you can’t be in the streets and in a relationship too. You have to give one of them up. So, I live alone, I’m single now, no kids. There are a lots of guys after me, but I’m just not quite ready to jump back in the dating scene yet, but a good cuddle buddy is nice every once in a while. I need my blocked knocked off every now and then. I have to check the headboard to make sure it’s still strong, if you know what I mean. Claire is single, free, and loving it.

Besides all the drama we got going on, we love one another and we’re always here for each other. We might fuss, fight, argue, fall out, and even stop speaking, but trust me it’s never for very long. We can’t live without each other. We’re like sisters, damn that; we are sisters. If you cut one, the others bleed. When one cry we all cry. That’s just the way it is, has been, and always will be.

Every second Saturday of the month we get together to let it all hang out, catch up with one another, and listen to one another’s situations, scenarios, and problems. Some we laugh about, some we cry about, some we analyze, and some we don’t get to touch on, hint; hint, Grace’s situations. We haven’t quite figured out how to give her advice just yet.

It’s now the middle of February and this Saturday we’re trying something new. We’re going to hang out at one of Grace’s spot. This is going to be pretty interesting to mix and mingle with the other side. I can say this though, no matter where we go, as long as we’re together, we always have fun. We all finally made it to the club and stood in line for about five minutes before we reached the door.

This story takes place in Miami, Florida

Chapter 1

What’s up, Grace? the bouncer said.

I’m good; how are you? Grace said.

You know me, just taking in the sights, he said.

I hear you, Grace said.

You brought some friends with you tonight? he asked.

Yeah, these are my girls. This is Janine, Nikki, Claire, and Laura.

Hi, we all said.

Nice to meet you ladies, I’m Rich.

Nice to meet you Rich, we all said.

Well, you ladies have a good time.

Oh, they will, Grace said.

I’ll see you on the inside, Rich said.

Okay, Rich, Grace said.

Laura was looking like she wasn’t with this.

I really think I’m dressed inappropriately, Laura said.

She had on this shirt that exposed her mid-drift and a pair of low waist jeans, hugging all her curves.

Why would you say that? I asked.

I don’t want all these women looking at my body, Laura said.

Shit, why not every man has seen it, unclothed, I laughingly said.

Real damn funny, Claire, Laura said.

Girl we’re here to have a good time not worry about non-sense, I emphasized.

Nikki, I hope you brought your bible, Laura said.

Girl, cut it out, if I’m going up in here, so can you, Nikki said.

Really? Laura inquired.

Yes, maybe I can save a few souls while we’re in here, Nikki said.

Nikki, don’t start that tonight, Grace said.

We all walked inside and there were women everywhere of all sorts: big, small, short, tall, masculine, and feminine.

I don’t think I can do this, Laura said.

Girl, get on in here, I told her as I slapped her on the booty.

Don’t play with me, Laura pointed at me and said.

Girl, I just saved your ass, now they think you’re with me, I told her.

We all laughed.

Okay let’s find our table, Grace said.

We made our way through the crowd. Laura made sure she was extra careful not to bump or brush up against anybody, saying excuse me the entire way. We finally made it to the table and took a seat.

Thank goodness, Nikki said.

It is definitely crowded in here, I said.

It’s always like this on a Saturday night, Grace said.

Ooh child…, Nikki said.

Laura had this crazy look on her face.

And what’s wrong with you? I asked Laura.

It’s just too many bitches in here for me, Laura replied.

We all laughed at her.

This shit ain’t funny, Laura said.

Just consider your pussy on vacation tonight, I jokingly blurted out.

Ha ha ha, real damn funny, Laura said.

Child, once she gets a few drinks in her, she won’t know the difference, I said.

Like hell I won’t, Laura said.

Y’all crazy, Janine said.

Shit as a matter of fact, where is the damn bartender, Laura exclaimed.

Yes, please get her a drink, I agreed.

Yes, please, because I can’t take all this shit in sober, Laura said.

This is going to be so much fun, Janine said.

Yes it is, Nikki agreed.

The waitress finally made it over to the table.

Hey ladies my name is Tracy, what can I get for you, she said.

Hey Tracy, Grace said.

Hey Grace, Tracy said as she gave her a hug and a kiss.

How are you? Grace asked.

I’m good, Grace. What can I get for you ladies tonight, she said.

I’ll have vodka and cranberry juice, Janine said.

I’ll take a long island ice tea, Nikki said.

Let me get a long island iced tea too, I said.

For me, make it a sex on the beach, Laura said.

The usual, Grace said.

I got you, a white russian, Tracy said to Grace.

That’s right, Grace said pointing at her with a smile.

Anything to eat? Tracy asked.

We’ll take a platter of hot wings, Grace replied.

Okay, coming right up, Tracy said.

It’s really nice in here, I said.

It would be even nicer if some dick was up in here, Laura said.

Up in here or up in you? I asked Laura.

That’s always nice. You read between the lines good don’t you girl, Laura laughingly said.

Laura, cut it out, Nikki said.

Tracy returned with the drinks. We reached for our wallets.

No need ladies, tonight is on me, Grace said.

Well alright, Laura said as she took the first sip.

The wings will be out shortly, Tracy said.

Okay, thanks Tracy, Grace said.

I feel like dancing, Janine said.

Okay, well let’s do this, I told Janine.

I took another sip of my drink and on the dance floor we went.

I’m going too, Grace and Nikki said.

I’ll watch the drinks, Laura said.

So we got on the dance floor. The DJ was doing his thing. The crowd was hype. Then he played my jam, Eve’s tambourine.

That’s my shit, I said.

They made a little circle around me and started saying, Go Claire, go Claire.

I was shaking it up. After about fifteen minutes of dancing, it was time for a rest. We all went back to our seats. The wings had arrived and we were plenty hungry.

Woo, child, that was definitely a workout, Nikki said.

You telling me, I agreed.

I saw y’all out there, keep it up now, Laura said.

Girl, I am here to enjoy myself, I told her.

Yes, something you need to try, Grace said.

Just pretend we’re in a room full of dicks, Janine said.

I see y’all got jokes tonight, Laura said.

It’s not a bad place. A lot of these women here are professionals. They just want somewhere they can let their hair down, be themselves, and not be judged, Grace told her.

Yeah, give it a chance, explore, broaden your horizon, I told her.

I need another drink, Laura said.

I’m going to the bathroom to wash my hand, so I can get into these wings, Nikki said.

We all joined her with the exception of Laura. By the time we got back from the bathroom Laura was finishing her third drink. She was loose as a goose. We sat and ate wings, but Laura hit the dance floor and was out there for half an hour. When she finally sat down she was drenched in sweat.

Woo, I’m hot, Laura said fanning herself.

You should be, I agreed.

Are you having fun now? Grace asked Laura.

I’m having a wonderful time, Laura replied.

And it only took three drinks, I jokingly said.

Shut up, Claire, Laura said.

I’m just kidding, I told her.

We enjoyed the rest of our night. We danced, drank, and laughed the night away. We had a ball. When it was time to go, no one wanted to leave, but Janine had to get home to her husband and daughter and Laura had to get home to handle some business. We headed towards the exit.

I really had a nice time tonight, Laura said.

Not you, Ms. I’m not with this, Nikki said.

I know I was tripping, but this is the most fun I’ve had in a while, outside of the bedroom, she laughingly said.

You are a total mess, I said.

I can get messier, Laura said.

Please, save that for the bedroom, Janine said.

I’m going home, take me a shower, and get in the bed, Nikki said.

Me too, we all agreed.

We gave each other a hug and a kiss and headed to our cars. We noticed that Grace didn’t move.

Aren’t you going home? I asked her.

Yeah, but I’m waiting for Tracy, she replied.

Ooh, we all said looking at each other.

Make sure you call us when you get home, Laura said.

Janine, you we’ll call in the morning, we all said, because we know how her husband is.

Just text one of us to at least let us know you made it home safe, I said.

I will, Janine said.

The first to make it home was Nikki. Entering her