Crickets Are Chirping but No One Can Hear Them: When Loved Ones Develop Dementia and Loss of Hearing

By Inge Logenburg Kyler

Crickets Are Chirping But No One Can Hear Them is a book meant to be helpful to persons dealing with family members diagnosed with dementia. Uplifting and humorous in places, it encourages caregivers to remain optimistic and cheerful despite what seems to be insurmountable obstacles. No one looks forward to such a diagnosis, and yet it affects a great many people in todays world. It strikes at the most inopportune time and can affect people at any age and stage of life. But like many things, it does not have to be totally devastating. It can be a time of garnering and developing patience and understanding where those things might not have been. It also reveals shortcomings in todays medical field in that there is a need for more information, treatment, and financial aid to cope with this ailment that affects so many lives. This is the story of one family, how dementia affected them, and how they dealt with it. Each and every family deals with a situation differently as each situation is different, but all in all, we learn from one another.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jun 22, 2017
• ISBN: 9781524696726

Inge Logenburg Kyler

Inge Logenburg Kyler grew up in the Pennsylvania Alleghany Mountains and attended school in Clearfield, Pennsylvania before moving to Lansing, Michigan in her senior year, graduating from J. W. Sexton High School. Inge married Arthur J. Kyler October 30, 1954 and has three children, three grandchildren and three great-grandchildren. Inge has been writing since fourth grade and has published over twenty plus books and hundreds of poems, many of which have been published here and there. Her career was mostly in township government which included graduating from Spring Arbor College in 1991 with a Batchelor of Arts Degree in 1991. In 2014 she received the Ingham County Historical Commission Heritage Award for her book “Holt and Delhi Township” published by Arcadia Publishing Company.

Book preview

Crickets Are Chirping

but

No One Can Hear Them

When Loved Ones Develop Dementia and Loss of Hearing

Inge Logenburg Kyler

36608.png

AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2017 Inge Logenburg Kyler. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 06/20/2017

ISBN: 978-1-5246-9673-3 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5246-9672-6 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2017909530

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

PRELUDE

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 7

CHAPTER 8

CHAPTER 9

CHAPTER 10

CHAPTER 11

CHAPTER 12

CHAPTER 13

CHAPTER 14

POSTSCRIPT

PRELUDE

When my mother was in her late eighties, my sister and I realized we were suddenly faced with problems we didn’t know how to handle. We both searched for books to read on what to do. We couldn’t find the support we needed. I began keeping a journal and vowed to write my own story.

Watching parents have health problems while they age is a wrenching time. Decisions that must be made with them or for them is not easy. Some people manage to keep their parents at home and care for them, but that’s not possible for everyone to do. Each person has to weigh the pros and cons of each decision.

It’s not honors and certificates or degrees that make people famous or important. Rather, it’s how a life is lived, how it is shared, and who that life touches. Mom touched a lot of lives. In our eyes, she was a great lady. May the story of her later years give encouragement to others who are faced with similar concerns. Most of all, we found that keeping a sense of humor throughout the crises we were all enduring, was important. It wasn’t easy, especially when we saw the effects of Mom’s declining health. But we tried.

This story would not have been possible without the loving care of Maplewood Home, Inc. staff under the leadership of Betty Breakey. Nor would it have been possible without the care of Mom’s primary physician, Dr. Edward Ball, who was so patient and understanding. Nor would it have been possible without support of our own family members, such as my patient husband who helped throughout the many years of concern and care; and my loving sister and her husband, who shared with the care and love, as well. We did things together.

We may not have always agreed with each other in our decision-making, but we cooperated in a spirit of love that Mom would have appreciated. Also, our families need to be thanked for their understanding while we spent so much time with gramma and grandpa. We hope that when our time comes, someone will care about us as much as we cared about those two precious souls, Mom and Sam.

Wintering

It is a subtle thing, this wintering.

One day the fields are lush and green

and edged in hepatica along the fence row

with blossoms that sometimes are lost

to storm clouds and heavy rains.

But then we awaken one morning

to snow cresting on freshly plowed cornrows

and trees that tower stark and lonely

devoid of leaves, and we wonder,

what happened in between?

How did this transaction occur, and when?

We know only that migrating birds,

the cedar waxwing, the longspur, the sandhill crane

visit but momentarily as they rest

and swoop over our dwelling on their journey south

to leave us standing in the doorway watching,

an ache in our hearts and a longing in our souls.

We suddenly feel very alone.

We are suddenly like those migrating birds,

here for a summer, and then

it is fall and we must move on.

We store memories away like dried roses

to reflect upon.

Leaves bloom and fall. Doors open and close

and another chapter in our life is finished.

CHAPTER 1

It was 11 a.m. before I got through on the telephone. Mom, I asked, would you like to come over today? My sister and I had mother on alternate weekends. This was my weekend.

No, Mom said. It’s too cold to go out. Well then, I thought, perhaps we could have a tea party at her place. I heated a pot full of tea and poured it carefully in the big thermos and packed two small teacups with saucers, a spoon and napkins, along with a little cloth, into a satchel.

Earlier in the day I had baked some spice cupcakes. I selected half a dozen and placed them in a tin, grabbed my crewel needlework, and decided I was ready to go. I was prepared to spend the whole afternoon if she wanted me to.

Your mother really misses you girls, said Frances, the bedridden resident in Room I, and I felt a tinge of guilt because I came only every other weekend. Since I worked during the day and often had to attend meetings in the evening, as well, every other weekend was the best I could do. If I lived