Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

Twin Cyborgs
Twin Cyborgs
Twin Cyborgs
Ebook603 pages10 hours

Twin Cyborgs

Rating: 0 out of 5 stars

()

Read preview

About this ebook

One purpose of this memoir is to describe to my sons Matthew and Alexander, granddaughters Sophia and Juliet, and any future grandchildren the driving forces that determined my destiny. I have often toyed with the idea of writing my memoir, but the writing would never have happened if not for the deaths of my father, Jim, in 2002; mother, Ruby, in 2006; beloved twin brother, Larry, in 2008; and treasured wife, Edith, in 2009. I realized that the memories of these special people would be lost forever if I did not commit them to paper as soon as possible. Our lives are finite, and our accomplishments seem ephemeral. Thus, in comparison to the seemingly ageless universe, the details of our lives appear to be mere vanity.

LanguageEnglish
PublisherXlibris US
Release dateSep 29, 2012
ISBN9781479717743
Twin Cyborgs

Related to Twin Cyborgs

Related ebooks

Biography & Memoir For You

View More

Related articles

Reviews for Twin Cyborgs

Rating: 0 out of 5 stars
0 ratings

0 ratings0 reviews

What did you think?

Tap to rate

Review must be at least 10 words

    Book preview

    Twin Cyborgs - Terry D. Oberley

    Copyright © 2012 by Terry D. Oberley.

    Library of Congress Control Number: 2012917204

    ISBN: Hardcover 978-1-4797-1773-6

    Softcover 978-1-4797-1772-9

    Ebook 978-1-4797-1774-3

    All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

    To order additional copies of this book, contact:

    Xlibris Corporation

    1-888-795-4274

    www.Xlibris.com

    Orders@Xlibris.com

    113049

    Table of Contents

    Acknowledgments

    Preface

    Chapter 1 The Times, They Are A-changin’

    Chapter 2 Are You Pete or Repeat?

    Chapter 3 Mighty Terry/Larry at the Bat

    Chapter 4 Tabula Rasa

    Chapter 5 For the Beauty of the Earth

    Chapter 6 Temptation by Eve

    Chapter 7 To Dream the Impossible Dream

    Chapter 8 In Sickness and in Health

    Chapter 9 Shit Happens

    Chapter 10 First, Do No Harm

    Chapter 11 Don’t Fence Me In

    Chapter 12 The Undertoad

    Chapter 13 Let It Be

    Chapter 14 Dancing Electrons, Making the Wild Magic of Life

    Chapter 15 What a Wonderful World

    Afterword

    Acknowledgments

    The author would like to thank the following for reading the manuscript and suggesting corrections: Kathleen Oberley, Paulette Sacksteder, Dave Hathaway, Sergiu Dumatrescu, Kelly and Mayre Lee Clifton, and Marnie Schulenberg. Kathleen Oberley provided information about the Oberley ancestors. The author would like to thank Sara Covington for transcribing postcards, letters, and logbooks. The author would also like to thank Alex Oberley for copyediting.

    Preface

    One purpose of this memoir is to describe to my sons Matthew and Alexander, granddaughters Sophia and Juliet, and any future grandchildren the driving forces that determined my destiny. I have often toyed with the idea of writing my memoir, but the writing would never have happened if not for the deaths of my father, Jim, in 2002; mother, Ruby, in 2006; beloved twin brother, Larry, in 2008; and treasured wife, Edith, in 2009. I realized that the memories of these special people would be lost forever if I did not commit them to paper as soon as possible. Our lives are finite, and our accomplishments seem ephemeral. Thus, in comparison to the seemingly ageless universe, the details of our lives appear to be mere vanity.

    Ecclesiastes

    OR, THE PREACHER

    1

    All Is Vanity

    1 The words of the Preacher, the son of David, king in Jerusalem.

    2 Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.

    3 What profit hath a man of all his labor which he taketh under the sun?

    4 One generation passeth away, and another generation cometh: but the earth abideth for ever.

    5 The sun also ariseth, and the sun goeth down, and hasteth to his place where he arose.

    6 The wind goeth toward the south, and turneth about unto the north; it whirleth about continually, and the wind returneth again according to his circuits.

    7 All the rivers run into the sea; yet the sea is not full: unto the place from whence the rivers come, thither they return again.

    8 All things are full of labor; man cannot utter it: the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing.

    9 The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun.

    10 Is there any thing whereof it may be said, See, this is new? it hath been already of old time, which was before us.

    11 There is no remembrance of former things; neither shall there be any remembrance of things that are to come with those that shall come after.

    —The Holy Bible (King James Version, 2000)

    Despite this biblical Old Testament view of constancy, in fact, both the earth and its human inhabitants alter with time. I felt it was important to complete this book since I believe that ideas can change the world. If you want to improve the human condition, first look in the mirror. While I acknowledge that much of this memoir reveals human vanity, I believe that Edith’s lifelong work improved the lives of many kidney patients, and it is possible that the scientific work of Larry and me may eventually improve cancer therapy. Only time will tell. I ask my sons to keep in mind that some lessons learned from previous generations are relevant today since they address timeless forces. Other issues may be completely antiquated today, but they are still a part of history. The names of the blood relatives of Terry DeWayne Oberley and Edith Marjorie Toole Oberley are accurate. Other names, in general, are omitted, with the exception of those individuals who had extremely positive roles in the lives of Terry, Edith, or Larry.

    This book is not primarily about travel and physical adventure but the triumph of human will over illness and disability. It is an intellectual adventure and a love story but will be of special interest to those with disabilities. I have been kept alive by a kidney machine for the past thirty-nine years. This has been accomplished by a combination of luck, advances in medicine and science, love, courage, and devotion. This book describes the ingredients required for productive lives in two individuals with major disabilities, the Oberley twins, facing overwhelming odds. I encourage the reader to view this book as a play. Chapters 1–8 provide background information and are an introduction to the main characters. Chapters 9–14 are the actual narrative describing the interactions of Edith, Larry, and me with the world. Chapter 15 is composed of thoughts after the action has been completed. While my memoir is quite long, the length reflects my many simultaneous roles in life as an adult: husband to Edith, father to Matt and Alex, brother to Larry, dialysis patient, physician, scientist, teacher, and kidney foundation volunteer. While none of the personal accomplishments or events described in this narrative would by themselves justify the writing of a book, the fact that the Oberley twins were able to lead relatively normal lives while having major disabilities is a subject worthy of documentation.

    I dedicate this book to Ruby, Jim, Larry, and Edith Oberley, each of whom contributed to my destiny in a very unique way, and Kathleen Coyne Oberley, whose love, devotion, and courage kept Larry alive for many years.

    Chapter 1

    The Times, They Are A-changin’

    1917–2006

    The Times They Are A-changin’

    Bob Dylan

    Come gather ’round people

    The order is rapidly fadin’

    And the first one now will later be last

    For the times they are a-changin’.

    Once upon a time, twin sons were born to a rural couple living on the planet Earth in the Milky Way galaxy. Shortly thereafter, the hospital burned down, and arson by evil aliens as a cause of the conflagration was at least theoretically possible. This hypothesis was developed by the twins at a later date in a preposterous tribute to their mother’s firm belief that anything that could go wrong would go wrong. We will reexamine the possibility of aliens interfering in the lives of the twins later in this narrative. Larry Wayne Oberley and Terry DeWayne Oberley, the twin sons of Ruby Eloise Moore Oberley (born February 14, 1922; died April 29, 2006) and James (Jim) Donald Oberley (born October 7, 1917; died November 19, 2002), were born in Effingham, Illinois, on January 23, 1946, between 4:00 and 4:30 p.m. The only discernible difference between these identical twins was that Terry had a birthmark above the hairline on the right side of his head, which was a small spot where hair would not grow for his entire life. Since the twins were so identical in appearance, the birthmark was a blessing, not a curse, since it allowed the parents to correctly identify their children. The twins were born in a region with largely parochial views, but the worldviews of the twins would expand exponentially with age and the passage of time. The world was rapidly a-changin’.

    In order to better understand the twins, it is important to describe the background of their parents. Little is known about details of their ancestral heritage since Ruby and Jim either did not know or did not wish to convey much of this information to their twin sons, though it is also true that the twins, minds on other intellectual matters, may have chosen not to pay attention when relatives were being discussed. Larry’s wife Kathleen Coyne Oberley has accumulated many names and birth and death dates of ancestors of Ruby and Jim via her current genealogy studies. Kathy’s work revealed that some of Jim’s ancestors were from Germany and migrated to the state of Ohio in America, with a census listing one of the Oberley ancestors as pauper. Some of Ruby’s predecessors came to America with William Penn to escape religious persecution. It is thus relatively certain that the twins did not descend from European royalty! Ruby’s mother Olive Blanch died, reportedly from tuberculosis, when Ruby was very young (age two), so the twins never met her. The following are from unknown newspaper clippings (likely the Casey Gazette or the Westfield Review) found after Ruby’s passing and document Olive’s marriage to Ray Moore and subsequent death at age twenty-nine.

    Married

    Miss Olive Blanch Neeley and Mr. Ray Moore were married Saturday, February 27th at the home of the bride’s uncle, Joseph T. Cougill in Toledo, Ill. by Rev. Youstler of that place. The bride is the second daughter of Mr. and Mrs. C. H. Neeley and is a pretty, accomplished young lady, being prominent socially and in Sunday school work. The groom is the son of Mr. Lawson Moore and is a young farmer of good habits and socially prominent. Their many friends wish them a long and happy married life as they traverse life’s pathway together. They were accompanied by H. A. Edwards.

    OBITUARY

    Olive Blanch was the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. C. H. Neeley, and was born July 12, 1895, in Union township Cumberland County, Illinois, and departed this life at the home of her mother, November 18, 1924, age 29 years, 4 months, and 6 days.

    She was united in marriage with Ray Moore February 27, 1915, and to this union were born two children, Hazel age 7 and Ruby age 2. She leaves her husband, two children, her mother and three sisters namely, Mrs. Edna Moore, Mrs. Letha Bland, and Miss Mildred at home, besides her many relatives and a host of friends to mourn her loss, but our loss is her eternal gain.

    Her father has preceded her to the Glory World, some few years ago.

    She was converted at the Pleasant Valley Church and united with the local class and has been a true Christian worker for the Master all her life, always ready to do all she could, and always had a smile and a pleasant word for any who came in touch with her. Her cheerful manner had won her many friends and has won many to think about the Christ she served so well. Only last Friday she was given a view of her Home in Glory, seeing beyond this vale of tears her Heavenly Home in all its beauty, and her last words were that she was trusting fully in the Lord to take her Home with him. Her life has been short but because of her patient suffering and cheerfulness she will not be forgotten soon.

    I know that my Redeemer lives,

    What joy the blest assurance gives

    He lives, he lives who once was dead,

    He lives, my everlasting Head.

    He lives, and grants me daily breath.

    He lives, and I shall conquer death,

    He lives my mansion to prepare,

    He lives, to bring me safely there.

    He lives, all glory to his name,

    He lives, my Savior, still the same

    What joy the blest assurances gives,

    I know that my Redeemer lives.

    The pallbearers were: May Ormsby, Glo Neeley, Fay Neese, Loraine Neeley, Ghuea Hurt, Hope Higsbee.

    The flower girls were: Bernice Cloud, Reideth Reeder, Fern Wetherholt, Easter Sidwell, Zola Delph.

    The music was rendered by the local choir.

    Funeral services were conducted at the Pleasant Valley church by Rev. J. B. Stubblefield and burial was made in Ruffner cemetery.

    MRS. OLIVE MOORE

    Mrs. Olive Blanche Moore died Tuesday afternoon at the home of her mother, Mrs. Etta Neeley, four miles northwest of Greenup, aged 29 years. Death was due to a two year’s illness from tuberculosis. Funeral services were held this Thursday afternoon at the Pleasant Valley church Rev. J. B. Stubblefield, U. B. Circuit pastor, officiating, and interment in Ruffner cemetery. Deceased is survived by her husband, Ray Moore, two children, Hazel, 7, and Ruby, 2, her mother and three sisters, Mildred, Edna and Letha.

    This event puts my life in a broader perspective. I was destined to die at age twenty-seven, yet medical technology kept me alive for thirty-nine years beyond this preordained time. Olive was not so lucky. It was Olive’s misfortune to live too early in the human timeline since tuberculosis is largely curable today. Imagine the anguish Olive must have felt, leaving Ray and being unable to take care of her daughters and watch them grow and mature into adults. Ray’s grief and sense of despair must have been immense. Ray Moore had grand mal epilepsy and so could neither keep a job nor properly parent Hazel and Ruby. I am not certain as to when he developed this condition. He worked at whatever job, usually farm labor, that was available until an inevitable seizure resulted in his being fired. Grand mal epilepsy was untreatable at the time, with affected individuals viewed by some superstitious employers as being possessed by the devil. As a child, I witnessed Ray having a seizure in the home of his brother Ralph Moore, and the wild involuntary movements and loss of consciousness were a terrifying sight to me. It was tragic that Ray was essentially ostracized from society and separated from his family by a condition that is often treatable today. The functional loss of both parents affected Ruby’s outlook on the world greatly. Ruby and her older sister Hazel were raised by maternal grandmother Mary Etta Cougill Neeley and her daughter Aunt Mildred. Aunt Mildred never married and was hospitalized for a period of time in a public mental institution for a condition whose nature remains unknown to me. Grandmother Neeley died of congestive heart failure soon after the twins were born but pronounced to Ruby that the twins were going to be something special! This statement was prophetically accurate since the twins carried a mutation resulting in a devastating kidney disease yet were blessed with excellent creative abilities in the fields of science and medicine. Like it or not, these physical disabilities and intellectual abilities were the destinies of each. In fact, the presence of kidney disease led the twins into science and medicine.

    Ruby and Jim grew up in south-central Illinois. The land was flat with rarely a tree. The sameness of the land was matched by the uniformity of the people, overwhelmingly whites derived from European ancestors. The latter fact did not change for many decades. There were four seasons in this region, but the average temperatures were noticeably warmer than those of their eventual home in southern Wisconsin. Ruby lived in a rural farmhouse and attended school in Casey, Illinois. Ruby’s family members were farmers, raising field corn. Ruby’s farmhouse was completely surrounded by cornfields.

    Jim’s father Charles worked in the south-central Illinois oil fields and had nine children from a previous marriage that terminated when his wife passed away. Jim’s mother Minerva was a housewife who had five children. Minerva’s first husband Elmer Hunt was a widower with one child when Minerva married him. Minerva was thus a second wife to both of her husbands. Jim was the sole progeny of the second marriages of Charles and Minerva, and most of his half brothers and half sisters already left home before his childhood. Jim lived in a small rural, tarpaper-roofed, one-story farmhouse and attended school in Westfield, Illinois. Jim’s house was part of a rundown farm that nature had taken over. A large apple tree populated by runaway cats was just adjacent to his house. The cat population thrived because of the abundance of field mice, and Minerva occasionally left milk for the cats.

    The environment experienced by Ruby and Jim in their youth was very different from the world as we know it today. Everyday life involved manual work in rural America and was labor-intensive, leaving much less time for personal examination and angst that is routine in the more labor-efficient, largely urban United States of 2012. Both families obtained water from a well, used an outside wooden shack toilet with corncobs or Sears-Roebuck catalog pages as toilet paper, and had no electricity. Both families obtained heat from wood-fueled stoves placed in central locations in each house. Butter (frequently) and ice cream (rarely) were made by hand from cow’s milk. Neither family had a radio, telephone, books (except for the Bible), or magazines because of absence of electricity and the lack of money to purchase such items. Small newspapers describing local social events were available. Ruby was poor because of the early death of her mother and the illness of her father while Jim faced poverty because of the advanced age of his parents, with Charles retired.

    Ruby’s descriptions of her childhood were minimal, yet she often mentioned events centering on the themes of poverty and religion. I cannot remember Ruby ever describing an event that was fun or even enjoyable in her young life. Ruby claimed she never received Christmas presents. She told the twins that she received coal for Christmas, her quirky version of humor. Ruby attended tent-held revivalist Christian church services as a child, meetings that strongly emphasized that all human pleasures were a sin, and therefore most people were doomed to literally burn in eternity after death. As a child, Ruby was totally immersed in water during a river Christian baptism; the experience frightened her, and so she was deathly afraid of large bodies of water for the remainder of her life. Thus, Ruby had overwhelming fears of two elements of nature that can bring much pleasure, fire and water.

    Ruby and Jim as adults had a long list of evil practices that their religion forbade them to participate in: drinking alcohol, going to bowling alleys (because they served alcohol), smoking tobacco, sex outside of marriage, wearing shorts (such a practice encouraged sex outside of marriage), gambling, and working on Sunday. Even laughter was required to be short and quiet to convey the seriousness of life and lack of humor in the Bible. They observed most of these rules as young adults, succumbing only to smoking, wearing shorts, and working on Sundays. Jim needed cash badly, so often labored on the Sabbath. Tobacco use was a major contributor to the demises of both Ruby and Jim.

    Childhood circumstances greatly affected the behavior and attitudes of Ruby and Jim. Despite our great love for our parents, Larry and I were critical of their personalities and actions throughout life. Having evaluated the circumstances of their early lives, I now understand that their psyches were forged in the fires of poverty and a degree of neglect. Thus, while my descriptions of their personalities are accurate, any perceived negative qualities were simply adaptations to the rigors and difficulties in their lives, allowing them to survive. Ruby definitely felt abandoned by her family since her mother had passed away before she had a memory of her presence and she had a vagabond father, although his wandering was forced by illness, not caused by lack of motivation. Ruby was intensely shy and anxious, a condition we now know as chronic anxiety syndrome. Any unexpected noise triggered Ruby’s startle reflex, a phenomenon that became pronounced when phones were available in her home and began ringing unexpectedly. Ruby often sat in a chair, crossed her legs, and driven by anxiety, continuously flexed and extended her upper leg for many minutes. Ruby exhibited compulsive-obsessive behavior. For instance, she checked to determine that a door was locked or a stove turned off repetitively. Ruby was a perfectionist, a quality of great benefit to those who lived with her since she ensured that every object was in its proper place and all household appliances were functioning properly. Her perfectionist quality was sometimes a detriment to Ruby’s sense of contentment since the natural world is ripe with disorder and decay. Ruby had a phenomenal memory, a trait passed to the twins. As an adult, Ruby had bouts of depression, which were easily identifiable since she committed actions that were to her own detriment and made negative statements, resulting in making herself even more miserable. Ruby continuously expected bad things to happen to her and her family, and when they occurred, she proclaimed, Always a sumthin! or If it ain’t one thing, it’s the other! Her anxieties prevented her from celebrating many of the joys provided by life, and she actively sought antianxiety medications as an adult. She viewed her glass of life as half empty rather than half full. As an adult, Ruby intensely mistrusted the motives of other adults. There were many causes for this distrust, including loss of her parents and the stern religious nature of the elderly women who raised her. Ruby lived primarily in the past, participating only as necessary in the present, and fearing the future. As examples, Ruby’s only friends as an adult were older people, and she distrusted all new inventions. In a crisis, Ruby thought of the possible consequences to herself first and only secondarily thought of the implications for others. Ruby’s potentially negative qualities were balanced by her loyalty to family members, hard work, financial responsibility, fierce love of her children, and excellent sense of humor. She heartily laughed at twists of fate in other people’s lives, noting the irony in many grim real-life stories. She once exclaimed to my wife Edith in a hilarious moment, I ain’t had so much fun since Grandma caught her tit in the wringer." Ruby was absolutely devoted to the well-being of the twins.

    Jim’s self-reported memories of his childhood centered on descriptions of his poverty and his enjoyment of sports and outdoor life. Jim did not have a pair of shoes until he went to grade school. He wore bib jean overalls throughout high school. As an adult, he confessed to the twins that wearing these overalls embarrassed him since this type of clothing was a stigma of his poverty. Because his parents had marginal cash incomes, he was routinely sent to hunt small game (squirrel and rabbit) and birds (quail and pheasant) to supplement the family diet, which was predominantly boiled chicken. Chickens ran without restriction around his farmhouse, leaving an incredible excretory mess. The bullets used by Jim in his rifle were hand-made by the family, so Jim felt guilty whenever a bullet did not find its intended target. Jim continued throughout life to savor nature, particularly enjoying fishing and hunting during the early years of his marriage. Jim loved dogs and relished telling the twins stories of hunting raccoons (coons) with his various dogs. At times unknown, Jim played on a baseball team (in fields with large tree stumps still present) and participated in amateur boxing as a lightweight (apparently quite successful until he was knocked unconscious and decided to quit). He described being on the high school basketball team but implied to the twins that he did not play much. Jim was an optimist and liked people and to my knowledge never suffered from depression. Although Jim was outgoing, he had a distinct lack of confidence in social situations involving people he deemed to be of influence because of his own poverty and perceived lack of education. Jim was a thoughtful man, yet a man of a few words, often having trouble explaining his ideas in a logical sequence. Unfortunately, he often blurted out a thought that was best kept secret. When Larry, as a teenager, proposed to take his girlfriend to a nice but modestly expensive restaurant, Jim exclaimed Gold digger! in the audible presence of both Larry and the young lady. Jim was a person who could be best judged by his actions, not his words. He spent much of his life helping others without recompense. In turn, the twins learned to evaluate others by benevolent actions, not fiery rhetoric. Jim had a kind, easygoing nature but lacked Ruby’s keen sense of humor. He tended to see the world in black and white, never distinguishing the shades of grey of which the events in life were actually composed. Jim lived in the present, enjoying life. In a crisis, Jim thought of helping others first and of his own needs only secondarily. Despite his stint in amateur boxing, Jim was a gentle man and never spanked the twins. In contrast, Ruby had a petulant temper and pinched the twins if they did not obey. Ruby also liked to tease the twins, telling them the black panther (black jaguar) would get them if they did not follow her orders. Both Ruby and Jim were nonconfrontational in real-life situations with other adults. Thus, it was extremely unlikely that they would openly and publicly express disagreement with the opinions or behavior of anyone outside of the immediate family.

    Basic survival was so physically difficult for the families of both Ruby and Jim that knowledge of the world was only at a basic level in both households, and often inaccurate perceptions were advanced as the truth. As adults, both Ruby and Jim spoke idiomatically, with Ruby having a unique south-central Illinois accent. Neither used the name of the Lord in vain though proclamations using words relating to excretion were often abundant when Ruby was upset. Superstition was apparent in both individuals, and ignorance about and prejudice against other races and religions were also evident. Jim often proclaimed while watching one particular African-American NBA basketball player on television, That man looks more like a gorilla than anyone I have ever seen. While Jim’s bigotry was a personality flaw, its overall significance was tempered by the fact that it derived not from inner hatred but from a basic fear of any culture that was distinct from his own. Knowledge of medicine was often inaccurate in both families, and Ruby described having her earache treated as a child by having her ear canal packed with goose dung, a treatment more likely to affect the sense of smell! Ruby and Jim were unable to perceive how the organs of their physical bodies functioned throughout their adult lives and revered their physicians as a result. Neither ever discussed matters of a sexual nature. The words penis and vagina never once entered their vocabulary. Ruby and Jim read newspapers about the world as a whole yet could get involved intellectually and emotionally only in events in the local areas in which they lived. Conversation centered on the details of everyday life and local gossip. Saving money was a major theme in both of their minds and governed much of their behavior. Despite these perhaps perceived quirks, Ruby and Jim were successful and productive individuals and loving and attentive parents.

    Ruby and Jim met while attending high school. There was an age difference since Jim was born in 1917 and Ruby in 1922. Jim started school late and dropped out of high school for a significant period of time. Both Ruby and Jim received high school diplomas though Ruby graduated one year after Jim. We know little of their courtship other than they went on double dates with another couple. Ruby sat on Jim’s lap in the backseat of the car, a practice that was highly scandalous to Grandmother Neeley and Aunt Mildred. Black-and-white photographs of each at that time show a very attractive couple, each having medium-length wavy hair in relation to the average standards for the different sexes. Jim was of average height at five feet, nine inches, while Ruby was short at five feet, two inches. Each was below average (Jim) to average (Ruby) in weights in comparison to their heights. Jim’s hair was black whereas Ruby’s hair was strawberry blonde. Jim had blue eyes whereas Ruby’s were hazel.

    Ruby and Jim were married on April 19, 1941, in St. Louis, Missouri. Newspaper clippings show that a small number of relatives and friends attended the wedding.

    MOORE-OBERLEY

    Miss Ruby Moore, of Greenup, and Donald Oberley, of Westfield, were united in marriage 12 o’clock noon, Saturday, April 19th at the home of Rev. William Kelley in St. Louis, Mo.

    Mrs. Oberley is the daughter of Ray Moore of Greenup and she is a graduate of Casey Township High School with the class of 1940.

    Mr. Oberley is the son of Mr. and Mrs. Charles Oberley of Westfield and a graduate of the Westfield High School with the class of 1939.

    They were accompanied by Miss Mildred Neely, of Greenup; and Mr. and Mrs. Allen Doty, sister and brother-in-law of the bride.

    The newlyweds enjoyed a wonderful dinner at the home of Mr. and Mrs. Arthur Hurt in St. Louis and spent the afternoon at Forrest Park.

    They returned Sunday evening to their home in Westfield where they will make their future residence. The many friends of Mr. and Mrs. Oberley wish them many happy years of married life.

    Newspaper unknown; date unknown; clipping found in Ruby Moore Oberley’s home

    WEDDING SHOWER

    A charivari and wedding shower was given at the home of Mrs. Etta Neeley Monday night for Mr. and Mrs. Donald Oberley who were recently married. The evening was enjoyed by all. Mr. and Mrs. Oberley received many useful and lovely gifts after which ice cream, cup cakes and candy was served to the following:

    Mrs. Sally Faulkner, Mrs. Martha Smith, Ray Moore, Mrs. Daisy Kemper, Miss Eva Smith, Mr. and Mrs. Ernest Denny and children, Mr. and Mrs. Hiram Denney, Mr. and Mrs. Ben Moore, Mr. and Mrs. H. A. Sidwell, Mr. and Mrs. Frankie Hanners and son, Mr. and Mrs. M. W. Neeley, Mr. and Mrs. Leo Nees and children, Mr. and Mrs. Forrest Delp and children, Mr. and Mrs. Louie Henderson, Mrs. Charley Glenn, Mrs. Ella Moore, Marietta and Helen Henderson, Max Moore, Buren Sidwell, Herman Glenn, Ralph Moore, Mrs. Laura Doty and daughter, Mr. and Mrs. Steve Inman, Mrs. Elizabeth Glosser, Mrs. Lissa Delp, Miss Orilda Neeley, Mr. and Mrs. Robert Shafer and son, Mrs. Allen Doty and sons, Miss Bernice Kemper, Miss Maurine Inman, Leland McMann all of Casey, Carl Snearley of Yale, Mr. and Mrs. Arthur Salzman and daughter, of Neoga, Mrs. Charles Oberley and Mrs. Willis Oberley and daughter, Mr. and Mrs. Donald Oberley of Westfield, Mrs. Etta Neeley and Mildred.

    Although Ruby and Jim had very different personalities, their social needs made an odd couple a good match: Jim wanted to nurture a wife, and Ruby wanted to be taken care of. In addition, their similar backgrounds predetermined that their marriage would be a success. Their shared horror of the poverty of their families ensured that they would be hard workers and always strive to save money. As adults, they adhered firmly to the concept Neither a lender nor a borrower be. Their fundamentalist Christian background resulted in a similar worldview. Charles Oberley (Jim’s father) and Ben and Edna Moore (Ruby’s great-aunt and great-uncle) belonged to the Evangelical United Brethren Church, so the couple had remarkably similar religious backgrounds. Each wanted a close-knit family to reflect the love that they had received from their own respective families, but love that had been given in less quantity than each perceived to be optimal. The fact that Ruby was selfish in nature was offset by Jim’s desire to help others. Other factors that Ruby and Jim may not have been cognizant of ensured their success. America was a free country, so they were able to pursue whatever paths unfolded before them. America was also a wealthy country, so there were multiple job opportunities. Finally, they were both relatively healthy. The major limitation on Ruby and Jim’s destinies were their restricted views of the world. Jim would have liked to have been a lawyer but never pursued further education despite the passing of the GI Bill after World War II. In the stereotype of the time, Ruby thought her only possible role was in the home and as a future mother.

    Jim’s first job was in a rock quarry, a job in which he lasted only a few days because of the extreme physical requirements of the labor, intense Illinois summer heat, and his slight physique; he weighed approximately 140 pounds at the time. He was soon drafted to serve in the army in World War II. He trained at various army camps in the United States. Jim described his fear to his sons when first parachuting from military airplanes. Pictures of Jim in army uniform show him to be sporting a thin black moustache! Ruby remained at home but visited him in Georgia, Colorado, and New York. While jogging along a body of water, Jim’s right ear became filled with water so that his hearing was impaired. He sought an army doctor to rectify the situation, who promptly punctured his eardrum with a surgical instrument designed to remove earwax, resulting in infection of the skull (mastoid) bone behind the ear. In a way, Jim’s life was saved by this event because he was ordered to Europe to depart on a ship that was later sunk by a German submarine with no survivors. Instead, he was scheduled for neurosurgery. Thus, were it not for a fluke in destiny, the twins would never have existed, illustrating how forces beyond human control can affect the future. Jim’s military service was very important to him, so I include correspondence to individuals and from local newspapers during this period.

    Sept. 22, 1943

    Dear Bill:

    I wish to thank you and all of the others who wrote in the community letter that was sent to me. I enjoyed it very much. I realize that I am a little late in answering it but the odds are against me when it comes to writing.

    You see, I am now a member of the 660th S A W Co., which is located 25 miles from Ocola, Fla. We are located on the shores of beautiful Doe Lake. We work 10 and 12 hours a day and have candles to see with at night, so you see I don’t do much writing.

    We live in tents and have nice loose sand for floors. We wash, shave, wash our teeth and clothes in the lake. We have everything convenient. When we have chicken we have 60 chickens for 578 men so you see that we have lots left over.

    I received 3 copies of the Westfield Review and enjoyed the news immensely. There are a lot of names in it that I fail to recognize. I guess if I ever get back to Westfield I will have to get acquainted all over again.

    I am back in the hospital again. If I stay in Florida long I will be a physical wreck. If I had my way about it they would give it back to the mosquitoes and alligators.

    I want to thank you again for the letter and to say that they are always more than welcome. I would also like to thank whoever sent me the Westfield Review.

    Yours as Always

    Pvt. James D. Oberley

    STATIONED IN MISSISSIPPI

    Mrs. Ruby Oberley, who resides northwest of Casey, received word that her husband, Don, who is serving in the U. S. Air Corps, has recently been sent to Keesler Field, Miss. for training.

    His new address is Pvt. James D. Oberley, 400TSS F616C, Keesler Field, Mississippi 36622100.

    HAS APPENDECTOMY

    Pvt. James D. Oberley, U. S. Air Corps, husband of Mrs. Ruby M. Oberley of near Casey, underwent an appendectomy in the station hospital at Orlando, Fla., Tuesday. Pvt. Oberley, formerly from Westfield, has been in the Service a year, and has been confined in the hospital for the past five months.

    Pvt. James D. Oberley, U. S. Air Corps, arrived Monday on a 10-day furlough to recuperate from a recent appendectomy, and is visiting his wife, Mrs. Ruby M. Oberley of Greenup, and his parents, Mr. and Mrs. Charles Oberley of Westfield. Pvt. Oberley entered the Service a year ago, and has been confined in the hospital for the past five and one-half months.

    Pleasant Valley Lady Returns from Ga.

    PLEASANT VALLEY, June 14—(Special)—Mrs. Ruby Oberley returned home Thursday after a two-week vacation with her husband, Pvt. Don Oberley, who is stationed at Camp Stewart, Ga.

    LETTER FROM OUR BOYS AND GIRLS IN THE SERVICE

    March 5, 1944

    Dear Doctor Houser:

    I received your group letters yesterday and wish to assure you that they were more than welcome. I am back in the hospital and mail is about all I have to cheer me up. The army isn’t so bad when you can keep busy and keep your mind off of home, but when you lay in the hospital for six months, as I have, it is anything but pleasant.

    Mr. Weeden inquired if I was getting the Review. I get it once in awhile, but it is still sent to Orlando, Fla. I got it the other day and saw in it that Hank Sprague was here in this camp. I went to see him and found out he came on the same train from Florida with me. He was stationed at the same camp in Florida, but I was in the hospital and didn’t get a chance to see him. I saw Joe Phillips while I was stationed in Colorado, and those two are the only boys from home that I have met since entering the army. I was with 150 fellows from Casey and neighboring towns for two months when I first came in the army.

    I wish I could answer every one of the letters that I received in this group letter but I have about all the letters that I can answer now. Most of us fellows like to receive letters but hate to write them. However I do thank each and every one of you for your little note.

    I don’t feel as if my services have helped Uncle Sam very much but I have done my best and will continue to do so. It seems as if everything went wrong with me as soon as I came South.

    I hope everything is going well in Westfield and I hope to see that little town again as soon as it gets a little warmer there. I have a furlough coming up in the near future.

    Well here comes the nurse with come more pills, so guess I will close this while I am still able! I wonder if they ever take any of their own pills?

    Yours as always,

    Don Oberley

    Pvt. James D. Oberley 36622100

    Station Hospital, Ward A 2

    Camp Stewart, Georgia

    Personal Mention

    Mrs. Ruby Oberley of near Casey has returned from a visit with her husband, Pvt. James D. Oberley, U. S. Army, who is confined in the base hospital at Mitchell Field, N. Y. Pvt. Oberley was recently transferred from Georgia, where he was also receiving hospitalization.

    OBERLEY DISCHARGED FROM ARMY HOSPITAL

    Pvt. Donald Oberley, USA, husband of Mrs. Ruby Oberley of near Casey, has received a medical discharge from this branch of service. Pvt. Oberley, a native of Westfield, has been hospitalized the past four months at Mitchell Field, N. Y.

    James D. Oberley was a member of the 903rd Guard Squadron stationed at Buckley Field in Denver, Colorado.

    Ruby became pregnant at age twenty-three but did not know she was going to have twins until the day of the births. On the morning of January 23, Ruby visited her doctor who said, Ruby, if you are having twins, I think they will come today. The first twin Larry was delivered sometime between four and four thirty in the afternoon. I arrived approximately thirty minutes later. Ruby was under ether anesthesia so probably did not observe the delivery of either twin. Ruby was bedridden for weeks after the delivery from vaginal bleeding due to retained placenta. The latter was finally removed weeks after the births by an elderly family doctor. Jim attended the births (but not in the delivery room). Jim explained to me at the time of the delivery of my first son, If a man was in the delivery room when a baby was born, they would have thought there was something wrong with him.

    Jim soon had to leave for the University of Chicago Medical School where neurosurgery was performed to remove the abscess in his mastoid skull bone. Jim refused further surgical procedures during his early adult life since anesthesia during this first surgery was not completely successful, and he was awake throughout. Narcotics given after surgery caused hallucinations, and he hit an attending nurse in the face as a result of his paranoia. The surgery replaced at least part of the bone with a metal prosthesis, a very painful procedure. Jim was partially deaf in the affected ear for the remainder of his life. His inner ear continued to be infected for many years after this surgery, resulting in pain, fever, and fainting until a curative procedure became available later in life. Jim was honorably discharged from the army because of his mastoid bone infection.

    Oberley Twins Celebrate Birthday

    The twin sons of Mr. and Mrs. Don Oberley, Larry and Terry, residing near Casey celebrated their first birthday anniversary at their home yesterday, January 23, with guests being Miss Mildred Neeley, Mr. and Mrs. Ben Moore, Greenup, and Ray Moore, Vevay Park.

    Lighted birthday cakes were the main attraction for the youthful hosts, with gifts presented for them to enjoy.

    Jim’s second job was in a shoe factory in south-central Illinois. When the job ended, he worked in the grimy and polluted steel mills of Gary, Indiana. Ruby and the twins remained in south-central Illinois while Jim worked in the steel mills. Because of anxiety, Ruby did not drive during her entire life, so cousin Alice Oberley took the family to see Jim while he worked in the steel mill, and all crowded together in a single motel room during the visit. Jim next obtained a job in an ordnance (bullets and bombs) factory in Burlington, Iowa. The family rented a small house during this time. When the twins were in the third grade, Jim obtained a job in the General Motors plant in Janesville, Wisconsin, and purchased a small house at 1421 Maple Avenue, the family home until Jim passed away and Ruby entered a nursing home. Jim retired from the General Motors plant at age sixty-two and remained in Janesville until his death in 2002 at age eighty-five.

    Jim loved working at the large sprawling General Motors plant though it was usually too hot or too cold, noisy, dirty, and filled with machinery that was potentially dangerous. For parts of three decades (1950s, 1960s, and 1970s), Jim punched in his time card shortly before 6:30 a.m. and punched out precisely at 3:00 p.m. Sparks from spot-weld guns fell continuously but apparently harmlessly on to the skin of anyone passing by in the body shop where car frames were assembled. Smells of oil, hot metal, paint, and solvents permeated the air. Jim worked as a millwright, a job repairing broken equipment during most of the year and constructing car manufacturing lines in the summer to mass-produce the new car model to be introduced in the fall. During this time, automobiles were put together sequentially from parts by hundreds of workers on a moving mechanical assembly line. These jobs were often physically strenuous, repetitive, and boring. Almost no teaching or education was required for completion of most assembly line tasks. In contrast, although Jim’s job was often physically difficult, it was neither repetitive nor boring and required both advanced training and his ingenuity to complete each of the novel tasks assigned daily. Jim was injured several times while working in this environment (a deeply cut finger; a serious fall resulting in fractured vertebrae and a lacerated kidney, the latter accident requiring hospitalization in both Janesville and Madison).

    The twins obtained jobs in the General Motors plant through the influence of their father and were employed in the summers of 1964–68. At this time the plant had approximately two thousand employees that worked in shifts around the clock. This employment gave the twins unique views into the life of their father. The microcosm of the world of manual labor they observed was to be in stark contrast to the intellectual worlds they chose to occupy in the future. In fact, memories of the world of manual labor served as virtual cattle prods to drive the future creative ambitions of the twins. Employees at the plant were almost exclusively white Christian males with a high school education. Plant talk often consisted of vile language sequentially using the name of the Lord in vain interspersed with diabolically arranged crude references to sex and excrement. The predominant culture involved male bonding in bowling, golf, and alcohol, with an occasional sexual affair enhancing gossip. In a sense, my father was a stranger in a strange land since he did not partake of this plant lifestyle. However, there was a sense of camaraderie at the factory that my father did participate in. My father loved to drink coffee and exchange gossip, trashing all General Motors executives, with the guys. Much to the amusement and befuddlement of the twins, Jim often impishly gave the finger and then laughed as a signal of salute to colleagues he recognized at a distance while walking in this very large building.

    The major social division in the factory was between supervisory (white-collar) and union (blue-collar) employees. Jim strongly identified with the union, was union vice president for a time, and traveled to Minneapolis to meet with his hero, AFL-CIO president Walter Reuther, to discuss union issues. Jim took a freight train overnight, rather than a daily passenger train, to and from Minneapolis to save money. He discussed Janesville union issues with Mr. Reuther. He was offered a job in the national union office in Detroit but refused because he did not want to leave Janesville. He also turned down several General Motors white-collar jobs in Janesville, being uncomfortable with the idea of working on the executive (non-union) side of labor issues. The twins were bothered by these decisions since an executive position would have required less physical labor and avoided physical dangers inherent in working along a mechanical assembly line. Jim voted Democratic in every political election. Despite this, Jim was more conservative than liberal, his most important valued principle being that one should be rewarded for hard work. He strongly identified with the redneck Archie Bunker in the television show All in the Family.

    Jim was a hard and tireless worker, often working double shifts seven days a week during the auto boom years of the early 1960s. In addition to work, once living in Janesville, Jim always had a garden in his backyard until just a few years before his death. He grew corn, tomatoes, green beans, peppers, lettuce, cabbage, radishes, and onions. Jim had a green thumb, carefully nourishing and watching over each plant. He often rented land so that he could grow even more vegetables. He was successful in growing a peach tree in our backyard. He loved flowers and planted flower seeds and tended rose bushes in various places around the house. One rose bush was transplanted from his mother’s house, and this bush survived until after his death. After retirement, he did most of the cooking and dishwashing for Ruby and himself. For my family, Jim built fences and wooden playground equipment, repaired anything that was broken, and fished woolen diapers from clogged toilets. A neighbor complained that a tree root under the sidewalk on my property was uplifting the concrete, making walking over the sidewalk dangerous for the senior residents of the neighborhood. While my wife Edith and I were away on a trip to England, he displaced the segment of concrete, chopped away the root with an axe, replaced the concrete slab, and presented us with a fait accompli when we returned. He performed all routine car maintenance at home. He once had a water leak in the underbody of a new Chevrolet that the local dealer refused to repair. He disassembled the car frame in the backyard during the summer, found the proper place to weld in the steel of the underbody, and then put the car back together. I was in awe of this performance. At Jim’s funeral, I met many men who said that Jim volunteered to repair something for them. Thus, Jim spent much of his life helping others.

    Ruby was the caregiver parent and housewife until the twins went to high school. She kept the house spotlessly clean, with weekly mopping, vacuuming, and dusting. Woe was the fate of any bug, flying or crawling, that entered her territory! She was a fanatic at getting the clothes clean and then neatly folding them, including underwear, before putting them away. She was an indifferent but steady and dependable cook except for desserts, the preparation of which was a discipline that she excelled at. When the twins started high school in 1962, Ruby began to work in the afternoon as a sales clerk at a drugstore across the street from Mercy hospital in Janesville. Ruby loved both the job and the gossip circulating through the store. She learned of all the births and most of the illnesses and deaths in the Janesville area. She befriended the other sales clerks, the vendors, and the pharmacist. Ruby’s specialty in the store was Hallmark cards, but she also loved serving sodas, shakes, sundaes, and cashews at the soda fountain. She brought warm cashews home to share with the family after work at night.

    Ruby’s employment came to a sudden halt when she had a mild heart attack in 1975. I was at that time a pathologist-in-training conducting an autopsy when notified but immediately stopped and arranged for the senior staff to complete the procedure. I drove to the Janesville hospital to see my mother. Ruby was hospitalized for a few days and returned to work in a few weeks. However, some months later, she had a second severe heart attack in which sudden relative loss of blood supplying her brain resulted in a seizure as she lay on the couch in the living room at home.

    Enjoying the preview?
    Page 1 of 1