The Long Journey to Happiness

By Sava Thabet Hassan

Book description
My book contains two parts. The first part of the book discusses the concept of happiness in general, and in a relationship between a man and a woman in particular. Most people regard happiness as an integrated concept. That makes experiencing its magical wonders seem to be an impossible task. In my book, I perceive it as a harmonious combination of various elements. If one attempts to experience each of its components, one will end up achieving happiness. I do believe that one can be happy if one could attain physical satisfaction, enjoy mental stimulation, experience emotional fulfillment and achieve spiritual evolution. A successful career, a loving family and devoted friends, a healthy environment, in which one can harmoniously coexist with ones fellow human beings, and an excellent health may facilitate ones route to happiness.
I examine every element focusing on the various perceptions pertinent to it, the factors, that may play a role in achieving it, and the means to attain it.
At the end of that part, I enclose criteria that one may use, to evaluate ones relationship with ones partner, to determine if it is mutually satisfying or not. One might be in a mutually satisfying relationship if ones partner enhances ones life not alter it, fills ones heart with joy and laughter, respects ones views not puts them down, satisfies ones physically, stimulates ones mentally and evolves with one spiritually, accepts one as he or she is, and never attempts to change him or her, and appreciates one all the time not only on special occasions.
Those criteria might not be suitable for some couples. In that case, they should define, their own, criteria for examining the degree of their satisfaction with one another.
The second part focuses on slightly fictionalized true events about the relationship between, ENRICO, a reasonably handsome chubby Arabic-Canadian educator, in his middle fifties, and ANNABELLA, an attractive Mongolian-Chinese woman, in her late forties. Despite the fact that they were brought together, in 2003, by unusual circumstances caused by the SARS Epidemic, a fatal disease that claimed many Chinese lives in 2003, they were destined to meet and fall in love with one another. They started as coworkers and progressed toward a friendship that developed into a passionate, yet full of conflicts, love relationship. At the beginning of their courtship, they were blinded, by the excitement of being in love, to see that their journey, to happiness, would be paved with obstacles that were caused by the differences in their racial and religious backgrounds. At that time, they were residing in a country entrapped in a net of old traditions, which restricted communications between the two genders. Consequently, one can imagine the difficulties that they had to overcome, to keep their friendship from being a favorite topic of gossip, among those, who shared their environment.
At the time of their first encounter, ANNABELLA was married to a Mongolian individual, while ENRICO was a divorced man. That made their interactions, with one another, a difficult task, to say the least. Fortunate or unfortunate for them, depending upon ones views, they were working together. He was hired as an educator and she was his immediate supervisor. That facilitated their encounters. They were instantaneously attracted to each other, not only physically but also mentally. Their mental compatibility was apparent to both of them from the beginning.
Chinese society doesnt accept being unhappy, in a marriage, as a valid reason for asking for a divorce. That fact made it hard for ANNABELLA to ask for a divorce, from her husband of 18 years, with whom she had two children. Motivated by her belief that she should sacrifice her own happiness to provide her children with a stable environment, she stayed with him for that long. Upon experiencing true happiness with ENRICO, she realized t

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Apr 11, 2008
• ISBN: 9781477176788

Sava Thabet Hassan

Author’s cover Bio Sava (Thabet) Hassan is a 57 years old Canadian Egyptian author/educator/poet. He was born in Egypt and holds a Canadian citizenship. Currently, he is teaching the conceptual art of English writing in China. He published two books and an unaccountable numbers of articles and poems. He used to write an advice column for an English magazine in China. He has two wonderful children.

Book preview

THE LONG JOURNEY

TO HAPPINESS

SAVA THABET HASSAN

Copyright © 2007 by Sava Thabet Hassan.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

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Contents

Introduction

Happiness, is it a tangible feeling or an elusive concept

Physical Satisfaction

Means to attain physical satisfaction with one’s partner

Affection

Sexual Satisfaction

Mental stimulation

Means to achieve mental stimulation

The capacity to communicate

The diversity of one’s interests

Wide range of knowledge

Polished social skills

Emotional Fulfillment

Romance in all its forms

Respect

Trust

Financial security

Spiritual Evolution

Criteria for evaluating one’s relationship with one’s partner

A Clash of cultures, a love story or an unhealthy obsession

The phase of first encounter

The phase of dating and discovery

The phase of falling in love despite the odds

The phase of suffering the agony of the breakup in silence

The phase of being or not being together

The phase of examiningother options

The phase of marital life

The phase of life as a new divorced couple

Dedication

To the memory of my beloved parents, to my brothers and sister, to my children and to all my students and friends

Introduction

My book contains two parts. The first part of the book discusses the concept of happiness in general, and in a relationship between a man and a woman in particular. Most people regard happiness as an integrated concept. That makes experiencing its magical wonders seem to be an impossible task. In my book, I perceive it as a harmonious combination of various elements. If one attempts to experience each of its components, one will end up achieving happiness. I do believe that one can be happy if one could attain physical satisfaction, enjoy mental stimulation, experience emotional fulfillment and achieve spiritual evolution. A successful career, a loving family and devoted friends, a healthy environment, in which one can harmoniously coexist with one’s fellow human beings, and an excellent health may facilitate one’s route to happiness.

I examine every element focusing on the various perceptions pertinent to it, the factors, that may play a role in achieving it, and the means to attain it.

At the end of that part, I enclose criteria that one may use, to evaluate one’s relationship with one’s partner, to determine if it is mutually satisfying or not. One might be in a mutually satisfying relationship if one’s partner enhances one’s life not alter it, fills one’s heart with joy and laughter, respects one’s views not puts them down, satisfies one’s physically, stimulates one’s mentally and evolves with one spiritually, accepts one as he or she is, and never attempts to change him or her, and appreciates one all the time not only on special occasions.

Those criteria might not be suitable for some couples. In that case, they should define, their own, criteria for examining the degree of their satisfaction with one another.

The second part focuses on slightly fictionalized true events about the relationship between, ENRICO, a reasonably handsome chubby Arabic-Canadian educator, in his middle fifties, and ANNABELLA, an attractive Mongolian-Chinese woman, in her late forties. Despite the fact that they were brought together, in 2003, by unusual circumstances caused by the SARS Epidemic, a fatal disease that claimed many Chinese lives in 2003, they were destined to meet and fall in love with one another. They started as coworkers and progressed toward a friendship that developed into a passionate, yet full of conflicts, love relationship. At the beginning of their courtship, they were blinded, by the excitement of being in love, to see that their journey, to happiness, would be paved with obstacles that were caused by the differences in their racial and religious backgrounds. At that time, they were residing in a country entrapped in a net of old traditions, which restricted communications between the two genders. Consequently, one can imagine the difficulties that they had to overcome, to keep their friendship from being a favorite topic of gossip, among those, who shared their environment.

At the time of their first encounter, ANNABELLA was married to a Mongolian individual, while ENRICO was a divorced man. That made their interactions, with one another, a difficult task, to say the least. Fortunate or unfortunate for them, depending upon one’s views, they were working together. He was hired as an educator and she was his immediate supervisor. That facilitated their encounters. They were instantaneously attracted to each other, not only physically but also mentally. Their mental compatibility was apparent to both of them from the beginning.

Chinese society doesn’t accept being unhappy, in a marriage, as a valid reason for asking for a divorce. That fact made it hard for ANNABELLA to ask for a divorce, from her husband of 18 years, with whom she had two children. Motivated by her belief that she should sacrifice her own happiness to provide her children with a stable environment, she stayed with him for that long. Upon experiencing true happiness with ENRICO, she realized that she was wasting her life, with her irresponsible husband.

ENRICO’S love for ANNABELLA was genuine and vice versa. However, they gradually came to the conclusion that their love, for one another, was not enough to build a happy family. The multiple breakups and reconciliation, during the span of their relationship, are a strong indication of the depth of their love for each other.

Finally, they decided to remain friends hoping that their circumstances may change in the future. With that glimpse of hope, they promised each other that they will keep in contact, with one another, until one or both of them cease to exist.

I must emphasize the fact that names, of the persons involved, were changed, their city of residence was omitted and the identity of their workplace wasn’t mentioned, to respect their privacy. Some events in the book had been slightly fictionalized.

The views that are included in this book are reflective of my own perceptions, pertinent to the topics that are discussed in the book, and should not be generalized.

Happiness, is it a tangible feeling or an elusive concept

We, all without exceptions, are chasing an elusive dream, called happiness. However, most people are aware of the fact that, it is an abstract concept. Does happiness mean the same to every individual? Some people perceive it as having all the wealth in the world. Others may consider having a successful career, as an easy route to happiness. Few could see experiencing the magical wonders, of being in love, as attaining happiness. Does being the center of adulation by others signify happiness? Regardless of the variation, in the definition or views of happiness, one can conclude that experiencing the following entitles one to claim being happy:

•   Physical satisfaction

•   Emotional fulfillment

•   Mental stimulation

•   Spiritual evolution

Or achieving the following:

•   Successful career

•   Being loved by family and friends

•   Gaining the respect and admiration of those who share one’s environment

•   Enjoying the benefits of excellent health

Or in a broad sense, being:

•   Happy within oneself

•   Living among a happy family and friends

•   Living in a healthy and luxurious environment

•   Being a citizen of a developed and peaceful nation

Most of us dream about experiencing all components of happiness. However, few of us are fortunate enough, to be immersed in its magical wonders. Those, who have wealth enough to satisfy their fondest desires, may lack the health to enjoy them. Individuals, who are blessed with having a loving family and devoted friends, do not possess the financial means to provide them, with a comfortable lifestyle. As for mental stimulation, most members of both genders are aching to experience it.

The majority of people regard being close to the higher power to be or God, as being spiritually evolved. They are always attempting to get religious, to achieve spiritual evolution. It is a misconception of the concept. Spiritual evolution means going on a journey of self-discovery. It is an attempt to evolve with time. It is focusing on one’s shortcomings, and exerting every possible effort to eliminate them, or to minimize their negative impacts upon one’s life.

The next question will focus on the relation between happiness and age. It is logical to assume that our perceptions of happiness may vary with age. A child would be happy, with eating their favorite meals, and playing with their toys, in the company of their playmates. As we advance in age, our requirements to be happy increase drastically.

We are conditioned to wonder about the duration of our happy moments, whenever we are fortunate enough, to be the target of their magic. Can happiness last a lifetime? Most people are skeptical to the possibility of being happy, for most of their lives.

If one poses the question, pertinent to the significance of happiness, to various individuals, one may be bewildered