ACCEPTANCE: A Memoir

By Valerie Chatterton

My life has been such a learning curve. I have always believed in fate and at times that belief has been badly shaken. With humility, I hope that my words may provide comfort to others enduring tragedy and grief. May they find within themselves the strength to focus on the positive aspects of their lives. To be empowered to be able to take control

• Language: English
• Publisher: John and Valerie Chatterton
• Release date: Jul 16, 2020
• ISBN: 9780648861737

Book preview

ACCEPTANCE

ACCEPTANCE

ACCEPTANCE

A Memoir

Valerie Chatterton

Copyright © 2020 by Valerie Chatterton

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Disclaimer:

This book is a collection of memories. The personal stories and memories by individuals recorded here are their version of events and have been both provided and reproduced in good faith with no disrespect or defamation intended. Every effort has been made to ensure the researched information is correct. No liability for incorrect information or factual errors will be accepted by the author.

Interior and Cover Layout: Pickawoowoo Publishing Group / BOOKBUILDER - www.pickawoowoo.com

Printed and Distributed: Ingram (AUS /US/UK/EUR)

Contents

DEDICATION

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

INTRODUCTION

1 MY LIFE BEGINS

2 SECONDARY SCHOOL AND WORK

3 MY NEW LIFE

4 ON THE MOVE

5 MOVING AGAIN

6 LIVING IN LONDON

7 BACK IN AUSTRALIA

8 OUR WORLD IS SHATTERED

9 TRYING TO MOVE FORWARD

10 VINEYARD LIFE

11 ANOTHER TRAGEDY

12 TRAVELLING IN RETIREMENT

13 MORE GRANDCHILDREN

14 AFRICA AGAIN

15 UNBELIEVABLE

16 ACCEPTANCE

DEDICATION

 It is with much sadness that I dedicate these writings to the memory of our

 precious daughter Lisa and sons Andrew and Mark, who all lost their

 lives under very tragic circumstances.

They live on in our lives.

Lisa 1967 - 1987

Andrew 1973 – 2003

Mark 1970 - 2021

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Firstly, I would like to express my gratitude to my darling husband John for his ongoing helpful advice, love and support in my newfound venture as an author. He has helped by reviewing my writing and working with me throughout the entire process.

Special thanks go to my neighbour and friend Christine Clark, a retired English educator who has edited my writing with much care and enthusiasm, which has added considerable finesse to the final outcome.

To Josiecar Guterres, a heartfelt gratitude to you for your extraordinary artwork of Lisa, Andrew and Mark.  You encapsulated their individual essence and spirit

After a chance meeting over Christmas with Nicole Lucey of Pickawoowoo Publishing Group, I finally published my ‘Creepy Collection’ of children’s educational poems, some 40 years after initially writing them. I have written my memoir ‘Acceptance’ with the assistance of Nicole and her business partner Julie-Ann Harper. My sincere thanks to them both for simplifying the process and making it an enjoyable and worthwhile experience.

Last but not least, I wish to sincerely thank my Son Paul and Daughter-in-Law Liz for their ongoing love and encouragement.

INTRODUCTION

Why am I writing my life story? I am now 78 years of age, and my life growing up in Cooroy, a small country town in Queensland, Australia was very different to Australian life today. My own family and others would find it hard to believe the simplicity, easiness, basic freedom, and peaceful way of life in those days. There were no mobile phones, no television, no internet and very few cars. Most people either walked or rode a bike. Society was definitely less affluent than it is now, but more formal, proper, courteous, and respectful. You may ask if life then was for the better or worse. We really knew no other way of life! There were many positives in life then as there are now, but things were very different.

Another reason for writing my life story is that I was prompted by my darling daughter-in-law, Liz, Paul’s wife, to do so. She felt that if I could explain how I coped with major tragedies in my life, then help and guidance may be provided to others in similar circumstances.

I have always felt grateful for the life I have been granted – a fortunate, interesting, in parts privileged, and at times a tragic life. I have always tried to stay positive and focus on the blessings my experiences have given me even in my darkest hours.

1

MY LIFE BEGINS

My life began on 8 th December 1941 the day that the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbour during WWII. I was actually born in the Hospital at Pomona, a small town 10 kilometres away, because the Cooroy Hospital was closed at the time of my birth. I had an older brother Alan (3 years old) and a younger brother Keith arrived less than 2 years later. My father, Jack (John Leslie) Bennett was a Building Contractor who worked very hard from daylight till dark and then drew plans and estimated prices for future work at night.

My Mother, Mary Louisa (nee Hooper) Bennett, had a beautiful garden around our house with flowers, shrubs, and fruit trees. There was a large vegetable garden in our back yard where she grew most of our vegetables. We had two adjoining large blocks of land and were able to have an enclosure for chickens and ducks and a fenced area in which to keep a cow. The cow roamed the streets during the day, as did the ‘house’ cows of many other families, and returned home at night to be milked. Of course, we had lots of milk and eggs. Mum was an excellent cook, so we always had very good, healthy food, most of it from our own garden. For dinner we had meat and vegetables each night and always a tasty homemade dessert. Mum made the most delicious sponge cakes. I have attempted to make her sponge cake recipe many times over the years, but it never, ever turned out as well as hers.

Our house was very comfortable, and of course built by my father. I can vaguely remember an extension being built onto our home when I was about five years old.

We often went for a drive to Tewantin for a swim in the enclosed Baths in the Noosa River on Sunday afternoons. Other Sundays we drove a little further to swim in the surf at Noosa Heads. Dad was a good swimmer and he taught Alan, Keith and I to swim and dive. We always bought an ice-cream at the little corner store at Noosa.

Both my parents were very involved with the committees of various charities in our small town – Dad with the Show Society, Masonic Lodge, Primary School Committee and the A.R.P. (Air Raids Precautions team), where he served as Warden during World War II. Mum worked with the Anglican Church Ladies Guild, Primary School Committee, C.W.A. (Country Women’s Association) and Hospital Auxiliary.

When I was a child Mum always made my clothes. I started sewing clothes for my dolls when I was about eight years old. I found that easy on Mum’s old Singer treadle sewing machine.

I started school in 1947 in Grade 1 at Cooroy Primary School. My first teacher was Mrs Bernice Smith – a wonderful teacher. She had two children at the school who were both older than me. I always enjoyed school and participated in sport – tennis, basketball, athletics, ball games etc. in school hours. I was always quite tall for my age with long legs, which was an advantage in running, skipping, etc., and often won races in the District Sports Carnivals.

The school was small in those days – only 1 class per grade – with few extracurricular activities available. I was able to join a pencil drawing class with an Art Teacher from another town one afternoon each week after school for two terms only. I was then aged about 12 or 13 years old. I really enjoyed the classes and was disappointed that they didn’t continue. This was my first small entry into the art world.

At the time I attended primary school, the main responsibility for teachers was to teach us the basic lessons of Maths, English, Geography, History, etc. to prepare us for life and work as adults. I believe that we were taught very well the main lessons for our future, whichever way our life was to lead us.

We always had good teachers, but my last primary school teacher in Grades 7 and 8, Mr Bob Powell, was my very best. Mr Powell was a wonderful teacher, was fairly strict, made learning interesting, joked occasionally and laughed at times, when it was appropriate. The children worked hard because of his leadership.

I was visiting my Mother in Cooroy in the early 1980s when she told me that Mr Powell was in Hospital and quite frail. I called to visit him and showed him some poems I had written about Australian insects. He was very complimentary. It is only this year (2020) that I have had these poems for children published as the ‘Creepy Collection’. Of course, during that visit in the 1980s, I thanked Mr Powell for his inspiration. He passed away shortly afterwards.

At 8 years of age I started learning to play the piano. We owned an old Belling piano brought from Bristol, England by Mum’s parents when their family moved here when she was a baby.

My first teacher was Mrs Claire McPherson from Pomona. She taught piano lessons in Cooroy to local children. While I was learning from Mrs McPherson, she entered me twice in the 19th (1952) and 20th (1953) Annual Eisteddfod of Music in Gympie, playing a duet in the under 12 years of age. In 1952 I played with Jocelyn from Pomona and in 1953 with Merle from Cooroy – each time winning 1st prize.

When Mrs McPherson retired from piano teaching in 1954, I started learning from Mrs Pattison in her own home in Cooroy. Her husband Bert was a school teacher and when they were transferred from Cooroy, I then took piano lessons at the Presentation Convent in Pomona. My first teacher was Sister Peter. I loved playing the piano and practised my pieces and did my written homework diligently. After a few years, Sister Peter was transferred to the Convent in Murgon. My next teacher at the Convent was Mother Bernadette.

Although I was not a Catholic, I enjoyed my time spent with both Sister Peter and Mother Bernadette at the Convent. Their calm sincerity made for a welcoming atmosphere for me. Also at the Convent was Sister Luke, who was quite a character. She got out in the playground kicking the ball with the boys, her robes tucked up out of the way.

When I was about 11 years of age, I commenced learning dancing from a Dancing Teacher, Miss Edwards from Nambour. I learned tap, ballet and toe dancing. I really enjoyed the classes and towards the end of the year we had a concert. When I commenced travelling to Nambour to High School, I had to forgo the classes as I arrived home too late.

At about the same age, I joined the first Girl Guides Group being founded in Cooroy by Mrs Byrnes, together with other girls including Mrs Byrnes’ daughter Pat. We all enjoyed our meetings and learned quite different tasks, some of which were very useful in later life.

My parents bought a caravan and we always had a lovely holiday in the Christmas school holidays for 3 weeks. The 1955/56 holidays were spent at the Caravan Park at Scarness in Harvey Bay. When we arrived home, my father decided to take an extra week’s holiday as he was still feeling quite tired. He also told the men he employed to have another week’s holiday. During that week Dad had severe pains in his chest. Mum called our local Doctor who came to the house to see him. The