Check In

By Krystal J. White

Understand people like a psychologist, communicate with them like a leader.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Executive Shaman Publishing
• Release date: Jun 5, 2020
• ISBN: 9781733503259

Krystal J. White

Krystal White, Ph.D., is a leadership psychologist with more than fifteen years of experience working with individuals, organizations, and communities. The Letter Code is her first book. In addition to being an author, she is a change management strategist, leadership development expert, motivational speaker, and executive consultant for individuals and corporations. For over a decade, she partnered with military leaders in the medical department, most recently serving as the chief of the Workforce Engagement Office at Landstuhl Regional Medical Center. There she directed and facilitated the renowned Selfless Leadership Program (SLP) and designed the Frontline Leadership Program. She has served as a radio host, a podcaster, an educator, a group fitness instructor, and a performance coach. Professionally, Dr. White specializes in crafting relationally resilient, emotionally intelligent, and result-driven leaders. She continues to serve as a private consultant and organizational culture advisor to military executives. She is passionate about building collaboration within highly complex teams and inspiring leaders to break through hidden limitations. Dr. White received both her doctorate in clinical psychology and a master's degree in Christian leadership from Fuller Theological Seminary. She specialized in the integration of spirituality and psychology. Before that, she earned a master's degree in mind, brain, and education from Harvard University. She is a board-certified clinical psychologist and completed a medical fellowship at Madigan Army Medical Center in pediatric developmental psychology. Dr. White currently roams the world, and permanently resides in the Pacific Northwest.

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Praise for Check In:

Check In is a dynamic team habit that stretches us to pause momentarily and genuinely share important perspectives. It frees groups to innovate beyond routine ‘Whack-a-mole’ problem-solving methods. It routinely helps people know they are valued, that their input is wanted, and that their entire self is critical for success.

—James A. Laterza, Colonel (Retired, U.S. Army) Former commander/CEO, Landstuhl Regional Medical Center

Dr. White is a change agent, disruptor, and soul stirrer. She cuts down to it and right to the heart of the matter. This is a real journey talking about real stuff that jumpstarts real transformation in all aspects of your real life. Some people are innately skilled, and some are masterfully trained. Krystal is both. Cliché, yes, but she has changed my life.

—Kevin L. Buford, Colonel, Board Certified Child, Adult, Addiction Psychiatrist and Coach

This book teaches you a simple, but impressive positive communication strategy.  Krystal’s ability to lead groups always equips me to use powerful and practical tools. Dare to work with her and your skills will be sharpened.  Ask her to lead A Big Share—it will break down barriers and build team cohesiveness.

—Royce Staley, MPA/HCA, RHIA, CCS Chief, Patient Administration, Defense Health Agency

Check In

Krystal J. White, Ph.D.

Executive Shaman Publishing

copyright page

Copyright © 2020 by Krystal J. White

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write the publisher at the email address below.

Executive Shaman Publishing

www.theexecutiveshaman.com

mailto:[e-mail]

Production by Stephanie Gunning Enterprises LLC

Illustrations by Eva Isabel Us

Cover design by Gus Yoo

Book Layout © Book Design Templates

Ordering Information:

Quantity sales. Special discounts are available on quantity purchases by corporations, associations, and others. For details, contact the publisher at the email address above.

Library of Congress Control Number 2020909035

Check In/Krystal J. White —1st ed.

ISBN 978-1-7335032-5-9 (epub)

Dedication

To you, the one who chooses to take in these words. To the one who is still a stranger, and to the one that reveals herself a friend. To the one I have chased, and the one I ran from. To the willing one, eager to be heard and listened to. To the hesitant one, unsure of what you really want to share, or what it really means. To you, who is relieved when it is not your turn; and to you, who is ready when it is.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely or connected.

Wherever you are, no matter how lost or certain.

To you, who has arrived here. Now. At this start.

Trust that this—all of this—is again for you.

INTRODUCTION

The Truth Is In There

Veritas, Latin for truth, guided the mindset of Roman civilization so powerfully that important tasks were marked with a V once they were completed. V conveyed to others one’s truthful performance. Human intention often gets subsumed in the modalities and methods of communication. Quick penmanship, slow ink, or a preference for speedy communication soon transformed the emboldened V into a hasty check mark. It’s literally shorthand to connotate truthful completion.

The image of the checkmark resonates deep within our spirit. Although some of us have forgotten it’s power, the need for Veritas at the social level is palpable and promising.

Discovering the truth about people has never been more cumbersome than it is now. As a society, we have become so accustomed and reinforced to check things off, or check things out, that we have fail to consciously check people in.

Take a moment now and consider the last time you truly checked in.

Your answer probably involves exchanging updates with a colleague, friend, or family member. Perhaps you recently traveled, and it required personal identification and verification. Social routines have been used since the beginning of civilization to mark our social statuses and arrivals. These processes are woven through all cultures and take numerous expressions. You have checked in to obtain a driver's license, voter registration, marriage license or permission to provide a professional service. You have checked in to receive medical care, attend school, play on a team, join an organization, or exchange in commerce. Perhaps you have joined a religious institution or spiritual group, or been baptized, confirmed, or ordained in one; each requires a check in of some form.

You have checked in your entire life, whether you wanted to or not. The social routine is more essential and more prolific than we assume. Most of the ways we check in these days are automatic. The process has been short-handed to the degree that most of us fail to recognize and leverage its original intention and power. Rarely does it raise our social awareness or inspire personal truth telling.

Modern society prefers instant, individualistic gratification over slow, social progress. When it comes to our social routines, we often don’t share our truth, or seek the truth of others. The human mind, body and spirit is hard-wired to assert an individual truth and sustain connectivity. We search for significance at a personal and a collective level. Veritas is on our minds and in our hearts, but we don’t know where to start, when to listen, or how to efficiently express ourselves with the real people in our real lives.

We need social routines and processes that invite us to truthfully reflect about who we are and genuinely learn about people around us. The human mind, body and spirit is hard-wired to assert an individual truth and sustain connectivity. We search for significance at a personal and a collective level.

The truth is inside of us.

This book outlines a single, simple process to meaningfully convey essential truths together. Learning to lead Check In will increase your capacity to relate to others with more authenticity, engagement, and compassion. These qualities must be cultivated to sustain trust and commitment in all your relationships.

Check In is effectively improves ourselves for the benefit of others. With consistent use, it increases individual emotional intelligence and collective efficiency. Attention to social dynamics becomes sharper, better organized and more cohesive. A collaborative community is more likely to develop.

Check In will give you a step-by-step routine that invites others to be more mindful, compassionate, and cohesive. After you have mastered leading Check In, you will find that it is the most efficient tool for changing the perspectives of others. It is a simple method for change management, that does not rely on a cumbersome strategy or bureaucratic buy-in.

This tool is designed for today’s contemporary thought leaders, entrepreneurs, and project managers. It also advances learning groups and teams who are committed to improving their collective performance. It works well for teachers and instructors aiming to instill social skills. Life or health coaches, mental health providers, therapists, and consultants can use it to optimize client responsiveness. It is beneficial for families that desire an easy routine to fosters honest, open, and fulfilling relationships. It is a great routine to consciously connect with your significant other, or the person you are dating.

Check In is paramount if we are to break free from the limitations of our current social habits and realized our shared potential. We need more people who show us how to honor our truths, serve others and, respect our planet at the same time. We need to be willing to Check In, and master leading it.

Who will choose to begin?

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chapter ONE

You Can Handle The Truth

The Ugly

Let’s be honest about our modern-day social lives. Busyness, overstimulation, automation, pressure to produce and disconnection run rampant in our adult routines. We are saturated in experiences of