Beanie in the Bottle

By Matt Wiedeman

A fun book for a road trip or summer vacation!

"I removed the cork and a little smoke came out. I put my nose to the top. It had a smell like one I’d never experienced before. I handed it back to Cole."

How scary would it be to walk to school through haunted woods?

When Ben left school with his twin sister Beth, he thought it would be the same as any other day. This normally means sitting by Angie and enjoying their short time together. However, Ben soon realized that this day would be different when an unexpected friend joins him in his seat. This friend made some poor choices on the way that led to Ben's bus privileges getting revoked.

So, Ben had to walk all the way to school the next day. He recruited his friend Cole to take the shortcut through the haunted woods. On the way there, they broke some bottles, saw an outhouse with dead flies, almost fell into a creek, and found an antique bottle that may or may not have something unexpected inside. All that happened next was the weirdest day EVER!

This book is perfect for weekends and holidays. You'll find a mix of humor and suspense.

Join Ben and his friends on this fun adventure!!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Matt Wiedeman
• Release date: Mar 9, 2021
• ISBN: 9781005265670

Matt Wiedeman

Matt lives in Cincinnati, OH. His books tend to have jokes, sarcasm, and adventure. Also, there will likely be poop and fart jokes.Please email any questions or comments to [e-mail]

Book preview

Beanie in the Bottle

By Matt Wiedeman

Published by Matt Wiedeman

© 2021 Matthew Wiedeman

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law. For permissions contact:

[e-mail]

Cover design by George Kamiki

Gloppy effect

The butterball effect? I asked Beth, my sister, as we waited in line to get on the school bus to go home.

"No Ben. It's called the butterfly effect," she replied.

Small changes today – like a butterfly flapping his wings – can cause unexpected changes that nobody even thought about.

That’s what they teach in the advanced classes you take? I asked.

Pretty much, she said as we boarded the bus.

Beth sat up front while I walked to the back of the bus. I almost always sit next to my friend, Cole. Cole sits by the window while I take the aisle seat across from Angie, a girl I like.

Angie and I have this thing where we don’t actually sit next to each other but each take an aisle seat in the same row.

This means we can sit next to each other without actually sitting next to each other. If we sat in the same seat, we would be teased by our fellow classmates. Yes, it’s dumb, but whatever – I don’t care. Angie and I have been in school together since we were four, but lately our friendship has grown into something much more than friends.

Cole was sick so his window seat was empty. I was surprised when another friend showed up unexpectedly to take Cole’s seat. His name is Gloppy. His real name is Boris Gloppenstein, but he prefers Gloppy. The weird thing is Gloppy lives very close to our school so he doesn't normally ride the bus.

Gloppy, why are you on the bus? I asked as he sat down next to me.

I thought it’d be fun, he shrugged. Besides, today is my birthday, he said excitedly.

Why didn’t you hand out birthday cookies at school? I asked.

Birthday cookies? How old are you, dude?

You could've brought in something, I said. Possibly some donuts!

Maybe next year, he replied.

Gloppy, you bypassed the bus monitor just to ride our bus? asked Angie.

I guess so.

Just to go for a joyride? she asked.

Um yeah, why? Is that strange?

She didn’t answer just shaking her head. Gloppy was in a strange mood, though. He didn’t seem to know anything about bus etiquette…or any etiquette, for that matter. He was annoying all of us who just wanted to get home so we could spend time hanging out and playing games.

I tried to devote my attention to Angie but Gloppy made that difficult by constantly talking.

This is a cool window. It goes up and down, but first you have to move these sliders. Yay, bus windows are cool! he shouted.

Just sit down and enjoy the scenery, I advised. There are trees and clouds out there.

Gloppy looked out the window and realized that getting on the bus was a mistake. Hey, I don’t think the bus is going back to school, he said, as the bus drove through town dropping off kids. I need to return to school.

Of course, the bus isn't going back to school, Gloppy. School buses are on a very tight schedule. Parents worry if the bus doesn’t arrive when it’s supposed to so the driver can’t make any surprise stops, I tried to explain.

Gloppy lowered his head, realizing his error. He went to the front of the bus to talk to the driver about his situation.

"Hey, Mr. Bus Driver, Sir. I got on this bus by mistake.

Can you take me back to school when you drop off the last person?"

The bus driver was pretty nice to Gloppy when he broke the news. Hey there, newcomer. This bus isn’t scheduled to go back to school. You’ve made a big mistake by getting on this bus, he told him kindly.

Okay, thanks, Gloppy said glumly, returning to our seat.

Hey, he turned to me, could I go to your house and hang out for a bit? I’ll call my parents to pick me up. They both work so I'll need to stay a couple hours.

Wow, my mom just loves to have unplanned guests, I said.

She does? he asked, clearly not picking up on the sarcasm.

I was joking! She won’t mind if you hang out for a bit, I replied hopefully.

The bus then passed a large wooded area near our house that, for as long as I can remember, was surrounded by a large fence. All the kids in the neighborhood were forbidden to go near it. Today, a gate had been removed which allowed easy entry to the forest.

Hey, Gloppy, have you ever seen an entryway to the forest like that?

No, I haven’t, he replied, then, sensing my curiosity. Don’t even think about going into that forest, Ben.

Do you really think ghosts are in there?

My dad has always been very clear that there's something bad in that place and it should be avoided, he said.

I hear you, man, I said, returning my attention to Angie.

Oh, I see what is going on…you’re trying to talk to Angie and want to ditch me, he said loudly, meaning to embarrass me and cause trouble. This may help explain why Angie and I don’t sit in the same seat.

What is he talking about, Ben? Angie asked, overhearing our conversation.

Please don’t pay any attention to Gloppy. He’s excited because it’s his birthday and he’s on a bus for the first time, I explained. Also, between you and me, I think he eats too much candy, I whispered.

We both looked over at him and giggled as he pulled some chewy sweets from his bag, melted chocolate all over his face.

Ben, you should keep an eye on him. He may do something stupid, warned Angie.

Lucky me…hey, I’ll text you later to talk homework and stuff, okay? I asked.

Gloppy overheard this and shouted, Hey, I can join the group chat too!

Angie and I said No! at pretty much the same time.

We chatted a bit about this, that, and the other for a while.

After some time had passed, Angie looked over at Gloppy and said, "I’m no expert on the law or anything, but he probably shouldn’t draw pictures on the seats. I think they call that vandalism."

I looked over and just shook my head at what I saw.

Gloppy was drawing crude, not family friendly, pictures on the seat during the ride.

"Gloppy, you’re destroying school property. You’ll get us in big trouble. We’ll have to spend an afternoon writing ‘I