Gossip, Secrets & Love: Past Love, #1

By Heidi Remick

Brianna learns the struggle of life, love & rumors that has her hometown in the know of what she's really been up to these last few years. As she contemplates returning home, she asks herself a big question... Is it worth the trouble and heartache she's bound to encounter?

Lying is something she's been doing for years now. Only her family know the truth of why she's stayed away, so what happens when her secrets come to light and those she was hiding from find out what she's been keeping to herself?

 

Can a past love awaken old feelings or will she be left behind, fighting for control?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Jewel Lynn
• Release date: Feb 4, 2021
• ISBN: 9781393781783

Book preview

Chapter 1

Istep into my apartment after my morning jog, sweating and breathing heavily. For the past few months I’ve been trying to exercise more and get back into shape, since I’ve kind of let myself go these past couple of years. Truth be told, I find comfort in food when I’m sad or depressed... But then again, who doesn’t these days?

Walking into the bathroom, I find my towel hanging over the shower rod. I pull it down and set it on the counter so I don’t get it wet while I wash. After a quick scrub down, I wrap the towel around myself and head to my room that I share with an adorable two and a half year old girl. My daughter, Violet.

I’m startled by my phone ringing and I drop the towel on the bed before picking it up. Hello? I answer without seeing who’s calling.

Bri... My Uncle Quentin replies, sounding odd. You need to come home. He rushes out.

What? I ask, confused by the urgency of his tone. Uncle Quent, what’s wrong? I ask, raising my voice at the end so he can hear me over the background noise. It sounds like he’s in a room full of people and I can barely catch what he’s saying. What? I ask, louder when I hear him mumble a curse.

Heart attack... is all I hear and I fall to the bed, my knees giving out on me as bad thoughts rush through my head right now. I pray he doesn’t say who I think it might be. Gram is on the way to the hospital.

My breath catches in my throat and tears immediately blur my vision. Not my Grandma, no. She can’t be sick. She’s my rock. She’s all I have left besides Uncle Quentin and Spencer for family. What? I whisper, hoping I heard him wrong.

He sighs in irritation. Brianna, get home now! He barks at me.

I am shocked by his outburst, but I understand it. His mother; my grandmother, is in the hospital. The doctors have been telling her that she needs to take it easy and slow down, but she’s a stubborn southern woman and figures she’ll work ‘til she dies.

I hear the phone shuffle before another voice comes through the speaker. Bri? My cousin Spencer asks, curiously. Is that you?

Spencer! I exclaim, so happy to hear his voice. I miss him so much. He’s my best male friend and the only person who really understands why I decided to stay in New York instead of returning home after college.

Bri, Grammy’s in the hospital. I’ve already booked you a flight home. You leave later today. He explains. He sounds as if he has the weight of the world on his shoulders right now. Look, I’m sorry I didn’t confirm it with you first- He starts to apologize but I cut him off.

No, no, Spence. It’s okay, thank you. I breathe deeply, wondering if I should call Amy to watch Violet or if I should just take her with me. I’ll call Amy and see if she can take care of Violet while I’m gone. I decide. If she can’t, than I have no other option but to bring my daughter with me.

So you’re not going to bring her? He asks, almost incredulously. Brianna, come on. He deserves to know and he definitely deserves to meet her. I can tell he doesn’t approve of my choice by the use of my full name.

Now’s not the time, Spence. I reiterate the same thing I’ve been saying for the past three years, with hostility. I’ll be there as soon as I can. I rush to hang up so I don’t have to hear any more of what he has to say. Thank you for booking my flight. I’ll see you later on and kiss Grandma for me. I hang up the phone and shift it between my hands, debating if I should really call my best friend, Amy, and ask if she can take care of Violet.

I sigh and hang my head in shame and sorrow. I haven’t been home in three years, since my Grandpa passed away and now it might be my Gram... I feel like a crappy granddaughter right now. She hasn’t even had the chance to meet her great-granddaughter in person. She hasn’t been able to hug her, play with her or bake with her...

I shake my head to clear my thoughts and dial Amy’s number. She answers on the third ring. Hello, Sunshine. She greets, being her silly self.

Hey. I reply, taking a deep breath. I have a favor to ask. I get straight to the point.

Sure. What’s up? She asks, her tone more serious now.

I take a deep, steadying breath. My Gram is in the hospital and I am heading home this afternoon. Could you watch Violet for me for a few days? I ask, hesitantly.

Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that, hon. She offers, gently. "Of course I’ll watch her. But, I can only watch her for this week. Next week I’m on call, again." She grumbles.

I chuckle at the disdain in her voice. You knew it was going to happen when you took the EMT job. I remind her. I shouldn’t be longer than a few days. If I am, I’ll make arrangements and maybe Brent can fly down with her so she’s not alone on the plane. I turn the speakerphone on and proceed to get dressed. I choose underwear, black leggings and a black tank top to wear under my white chunky cable-knit sweater.

Well, I can fly her down the day after tomorrow, or tomorrow night even. She offers. We can spend a few days together and you can show me around your hometown? She asks, but her tone of voice let’s me know that she’s thinking I’ll say no.

I’d like to say no, but I should probably allow Violet to meet her great-grandma, just in case. I sigh heavily, knowing I might be making a huge, disastrous mistake. Fine. I grumble. I really hope I don’t regret this. But wait until I call you and I know more about what’s going on.

Okay. Bring her by whenever you want. Amy giggles. I’ll be here all day. I’m so excited, I’m going to pack now so I’m ready when you call.

I laugh at her enthusiasm. Okay. I’ll pack a suitcase for Vi, too. I promise.

See you soon! She hangs up without saying goodbye and I laugh as I finish getting ready.

I blow dry my hair and spray some frizz-free product in it. Alabama humidity is bound to make me look like I stuck my finger in a light socket, so I need to control my hair as much as I can while leaving it down. I pull my suitcase from my closet and move around my room, packing light outfits; dresses, shorts, t-shirts, sandals, sneakers, a few pairs of jeans, leggings, a hoodie and a couple of sweaters, along with tank tops, and even a few bathing suits. Weather in the south is unpredictable, so you always want to be prepared.

I do the same for Violet and once her suitcase is packed, I proceed to finish getting ready by applying make-up to make myself look presentable. Foundation, powder, blush, eye shadow, eyeliner, mascara and a bit of lipstick. Once I’m happy with my look, I pull on my thigh-high high heel boots and with the two suitcases in tow, I head for the front door.

I put my charger in my purse and pull on my coat. Grabbing my car keys, I pack the car and drive to Little Smiles Daycare Center to pick up Violet. She’ll be upset knowing that I’m leaving for a couple of days, but she’ll be happy to know that Amy will be bringing her down soon.

With a deep breath, I wipe the moisture from my eyes and head inside to see my little Angel.

The place is quiet, so I am assuming it’s nap time for the little ones. I go to the office to let them know I’m here to pick Violet up.

Hi, Katie. I smile at the older lady. I need to take Violet with me. I inform her.

Oh, Brianna, dear. She greets me with a hug. I hope everything is alright? Her kind, warm hazel eyes peer into mine with worry.

I sigh sadly and look down. I wish it was. I reply. My grandmother is in the hospital and I need to go home. I tell her. Amy will take Violet for me and fly her down in the next couple of days.

Oh, dear. She gives me a comforting hug and I gladly take it. Let me go get her ready. She pulls away and I thank her.

While she’s off collecting my daughter and her things, I take a seat and text Spencer. He emailed me the details for my flight and says he’ll be picking me up at the airport. I am so thankful that Grandma has him and Uncle Quentin. After Grandpa died, I should have gone back home. I could have finished up my last year of school online from there. I didn’t need to stay here, but I chose to because I had something to prove, or so I thought.

The only thing I proved was that I couldn’t handle life by myself, but I am trying.

God, am I trying.

Mommy? I hear my daughter’s little voice, ask.

I turn to the door on my right and see my little Angel enter the room. She looks sleepy and her clothes are crumpled a bit.

Hey sweetie. I greet her with a warm smile. Come see Momma. I coo and she rushes over to me, climbing in my lap. She cuddles up against me and sighs, contentedly. Did you just wake up? I ask and she nods. One thing I love about Violet is she isn’t much of a talker when she first wakes up. I love it because I am not a morning person, so I get irritated easily, when someone starts talking to me as soon as my eyes open. I’m sorry to have to pick you up, but I need you to stay with Amy for a few days. Is that okay? I ask, looking down at her.

Why? She asks, her voice bordering whiny.

Because Mommy needs to go somewhere for a few days, but Amy is going to bring you to me tomorrow or the next day. I explain the best I can, without giving too much information.

She pouts and I swear the look nearly kills me. She is the spitting imagine of her father and every time she makes a pouty face, I can picture him doing the same. It makes my heart hurt to see it on her, but it makes me want to cry when I see him in her.

Why can’t I come now? She asks, her little blue eyes filling with tears.

I sigh quietly and brush her hair behind her ear. Because honey, my Grammy is in the hospital right now. But I promise you, once I know more I will tell Amy to bring you to me so you can meet your great-grandma, uncle and cousin.

She smiles a faint smile and turns on my lap to face me. Will I get to meet my- She starts, but I interrupt her, knowing what she’s going to ask.

Come on, Sweetpea, it’s time to go. I tell her and stand from my seat. I adjust her on my hip and take the bag offered by Katie. Thank you, Kate. I tell her, appreciatively. I will let you know what happens.

She nods with a sad smile. Good luck. She wishes and I walk past her, heading for the exit.

Back outside, I buckle Violet into her car seat and close the door. I take a deep breath before getting into the driver’s seat. I really hope I can distract her with music to keep her from asking anymore questions right now.

I get in, buckle up and start the car, making sure the heater is on full blast, so my little darling doesn’t freeze. Are you ready? I ask, looking at her through the rearview mirror.

Yes. She replies with a smile.

I head off to Amy’s house and pray the next few days go smoothly. My stomach aches and my heart hurts, knowing what I’m about to do.

Chapter 2

‘T his just in, our beloved bakery owner, Mrs. Marjorie Evans has been hospitalized after having a heart attack. It seems she’s been feeling a little under the weather for a few days now, but didn’t tell anyone in fear her family would find out and urge her to seek medical assistance. Now listeners, if anyone knows Mrs. Evans, you will know she is a stubborn southern woman who will do what she wants, when she wants and nobody will tell her otherwise...’

I sigh as I see that Jasper has already put the word out about my grandmother. Gram is going to ring his neck when she finds out and I can only hope I am there to witness it. Jasper Wilkes is a Nosy Nelly that thrives on gossip in our little town. He has a gossip column that he thinks is news-worthy, but he hasn’t done much good by posting his ridiculous finds.

There’s been a few times where my own life stories have been broadcasted on his website. I wasn’t happy, but my grandmother was absolutely irate when she found out through the grapevine that I wasn’t exactly being lady-like. Like the time I got drunk the night before the Homecoming Parade and fell off the float... Yeah, I was grounded for two weeks, lost my phone, car and had to do community service at the church. I had to take a bunch of tween girls on a hike, which was not fun at all, because I couldn’t even have my boyfriend come with me.

This is your Captain speaking. Please fold your trays and buckle your seat belt as we prepare to land. The Captain voices over the speakers, interrupting my thoughts.

I take a deep breath and buckle myself in, trying not to psych myself out about returning home after so long.

Once the plane finally lands and we are able to exit, I grab my purse and rush off, ready to leave the claustrophobic tin can behind. I turn the Airplane mode off on my phone so I can call Amy once I have my suitcase to let her know I made it, safely.

As I walk through the gate to baggage claim, I’m hit with the southern heat. I dressed for winter in New York, but down here it feels like summer!

Excuse me, can you tell me where the restrooms are? I ask the attendant at baggage claim, as I fan my face to cool myself... Or at least try to. I’m changing before calling anyone.

Take a right and it’s the first door on the left. The nice gentleman replies, not bothering to look up from shuffling the suitcases and bags.

Thanks. I shrug my shoulder and grab for my suitcase. I head to the bathroom and change into a pair of short shorts and a tank top. Thankfully, I was smart enough to shave my legs this morning while I showered.

I sigh in relief when I exit the bathroom, feeling so much cooler. I dial Amy’s number after getting my phone from my purse. Hello, sweetie. You make it there? She greets.

Yes, I’m here. I reply with a sigh. Is Violet alright? I ask. She was excited to know she would be taking an airplane ride to come see me, soon. Little kids are easy to please.

She’s doing fine. Don’t worry your pretty little head. She laughs. Right now she’s eating dinner. I’ll have her call you before bed. She promises.

Thank you so much, Amy. I say, gratefully. I really appreciate all of your help. Tears begin to blur my vision as I realize just how much Amy has helped me over the past few years. She is my rock. My best friend. My sister at heart. I love you, guys. I’m going to head to the hospital to check on my gram before going to the house. I wipe my eyes and look around for Spencer. He promised to pick me up so I didn’t need to take a cab.

We love you too, Bri. Take care and we’ll see you soon. Amy blows me a kiss through the phone before ending our call. She hardly ever says goodbye.

I take a deep breath and search for a familiar face, but don’t see it. Just as I’m about to give up, I spot a tall, muscular man with messy sandy blonde hair, walking towards me and I squeal in excitement at seeing my cousin after so long.

Spencer! I yell, waving my hands in front of me to get his attention. Spencer! I yell again, when he looks to his left. When he finally sees me, I start running, pulling my suitcase behind me. I’m so freaking happy to see you. I exclaim and drop my things so I can hug him.

Damn, Bri. He grins as I lunge at him, gripping him tight. How long has it been, now? He chuckles, hugging me back and lifting me off the ground.

I let go and he sets me back on my feet. Three years. I mutter, moving my hair from my face and beaming up at him with a bright smile.

He nods, claps his hands and rubs them together. Shall we go? He asks, a solemn look overtaking his previously happy one.

I nod and he reaches for my suitcase, pulling it along behind him. I follow, holding my purse and tucking my phone away so I don’t drop it. Yeah. We’re heading to the hospital, right? I ask, wanting to see my gram, badly.

Of course. He nods, heading to the exit doors.

Once outside I smell the fresh Alabama air and inhale, deeply. I miss this so much. Thank you, Spence.

He doesn’t respond until we are situated inside his truck, buckled up and ready to go. No problem. He nods, starting the truck and driving away from the airport and towards the hospital.

Our trip is short and quiet. Spencer seems to be deep in thought and I too, have my own issues to think about. Now that I’m back home, I’m seeing my gram, my uncle, my cousin and possibly my ex. I haven’t seen him in three years. I moved away seven years ago, but I came back to visit when my grandpa passed away.

In all honesty, I shouldn’t have stayed away for so long, but I do have a reason as to why I chose to. And it’s about to unfold sooner rather than later...

Chapter 3

H ow have you and Violet been doing? Spencer asks as we walk to my gram’s hospital room. He’s at least six inches taller than me, so I have to crane my neck in order to see his curious, bright blue eyes.

I shrug. As good as we can be. I answer, honestly. I turn my head forward and avoid his questioning stare.

What’s going on? He asks, quietly. You’re still working, right? He takes my arm and stops walking, making me stop with him.

I sigh in frustration. Spencer, now’s not the time. I’d like to see gram, first. I grumble and pull my arm from his grip. I continue walking, and stopping just outside her door, I turn to him. I place my hand on his bicep and look up at his furrowed eyes. I promise to tell you everything, later. I give him my most sincere look so he can see I’m being honest. I promise. I stress.

He sighs and pinches his nose. Fine. He nods, dropping the subject.

Together we enter the hospital room and my gram is sitting up in her bed, while my uncle is fussing over her. Knock it off, Quentin. I’m fine. She snaps at him in her southern drawl and swats his hand away when he tries to feed her some blue jello.

Mother, you need to eat- Uncle Quentin starts to say, before Spencer cuts him off.

Hey, Grandma, look who I found at the airport! He exclaims happily as we make our way closer to her bed.

Gram and Uncle Quentin turn their heads our way and my grandma gasps, throwing her hands over her mouth. Brianna Lynn! She sobs, holding her arms out to me. I move closer to her bedside and she pulls me in for a suffocating hug. My baby girl is home. She coos as she rocks us back and forth. Praise the Lord, my Angel has come back. She continues to cry for a few minutes and I just hold her, realizing just how much I have missed this lovely, spunky woman. My baby girl. She whispers.

Tears fill my eyes and I let them fall down my cheeks. There’s been no better woman in my life, besides my Grammy. She’s always been my Saving Grace. My mom at heart. And I miss her so damn much.

I hug her a little tighter before letting go and stepping back. I smile a wobbly smile and wipe my tears. I’ve missed you so much, Gram. I tell her. She brushes my hair away from my face and tucks it behind my ear. Her palm sits softly against my cheek and when our eyes collide, I can see the love and fondness she has for me. I love you. I whisper, leaning forward and kissing her cheek.

Her hand falls from my cheek when I step back, so I take that hand and hold it in mine. Oh sweetie. I am so happy to see you. She smiles a toothless smile and I see that her dentures are not in her mouth. Usually that would make me shutter, but right now all I can do is smile in sadness and relief.

Sadness at seeing her looking so frail in this big bed and relief because she is still here with us. Right where she’s supposed to be.

I’m very happy to see you, too. I reply. I notice her hair is getting gray, but she had it up in an elegant twist.

Even for someone of her age, she manages to still look prim and proper.

Get over here, young lady. Uncle Quentin beckons me and I obey. When I reach him, he pulls me into a gut crushing hug. It’s so damn good to see you, pretty girl. He whispers and kisses my head.

I hug him back and whisper, You too. When I step away, I start to laugh a little. You’re looking a bit rough, Uncle.

He’s six feet tall, sandy blonde hair and blue eyes like Spencer. But Uncle Quentin isn’t as built as Spencer, he’s more on the leaner side.

Spencer and Gram laugh at my poke towards Quentin and he playfully scowls at me. Yeah well, your hair is frizzy. He jabs and sticks his tongue out at me.

I laugh harder. Real mature, Old Man. I retort, sending him my sweetest smile.

Before things can get out of hand, a nurse comes in to tell us visiting hours are over. Sighs fly around the room before we bid Grandma a goodnight. I love you. I repeat. I can’t wait for you to come home.

Are you staying long? She asks, her eyes hopeful.

I take a deep breath before answering. As long as you need me. I reply, honestly. Just a few minutes with her and seeing how frail she really is, makes me realize that this isn’t going to be a short trip. I need to spend as much time with her as I possibly can, before it’s time for her to fly high.

I didn’t get to see my Grandpa before he passed away and I regret it, every day.

Tears fall from her eyes and a beaming smile crosses her face. I am so happy to hear that. She rubs my hand between hers, sniffling. I’ll be home tomorrow. She assures me. These two can fill you in on what the doctor said.

Okay. I love you, Gram. Goodnight. I kiss her cheek one last time before moving and giving Spencer room to say goodbye.

You two run along. I have somewhere to go before I head home. Uncle Quentin says, after he bids Grandma goodnight.

Okay. Love you, Uncle Quent. I hug him goodbye, knowing that if I don’t see him at home tonight, I’ll see him tomorrow.

Love you, Dad. See you later. Spencer gives him a man-hug before directing me back down the hall and towards the hospital’s exit.

Truth be told, I can’t wait to get out of here. I don’t particularly care for hospitals. They don’t bring good memories, other than the birth of Violet.

Once we step outside, I inhale deeply, trying to erase the smell of cleaning products from my nose.

So, you staying in the house tonight or do you want to stay in the cabin? Spencer asks as we walk to his truck. He tosses his keys in the air and catches them repeatedly, as he awaits my answer.

I check the time on my phone and see it’s already seven at night. Ugh. I groan. I’ll stay in the house for tonight, but can we get something to eat before heading home, please? I ask, pouting my lip and fluttering my lashes. I’m starving. I exaggerate my rubbing my stomach.

Spencer laughs and nods. Of course. He sighs and I almost know what’s coming, but I’m surprised when he asks about my best friend since grade school. So, are you going to let Chelsea know that you’re in town? He glances over at me before turning his gaze back to the road ahead of us.

Oh. Yeah. I plan on calling her tomorrow. I chirp, smiling at the thought of actually seeing her. Chelsea is the opposite of Amy. She’s cool, calm and collected, where Amy is flirtatious, loud and all over the place at times. But, I love them both for who they are, which is my best friends.

I’m kind of excited for them to finally meet each other.

Good. She’s been on my ass all day about whether or not you were coming home. He chuckles. But I didn’t tell her you were because I wasn’t sure if you wanted anyone to know. He smiles over at me as he stops at the drive thru of McDonald’s.

No worries. And, thank you, Spence. For everything. I smile, sincerely.

He nods. What do you want to eat? I ramble off my order, which is a Big Mac with a medium Chocolate Shake. He orders a ton of food for himself and pulls forward to pay. I dig my wallet from my purse to pay for my food, but his hand stops me. I look up and see him staring down at me, a sad smile on his face. I’ve got it. He says, squeezing my hand, gently. "You save your money for