What Comes Next

By Heidi Barr

Job loss.  It’s not something that most people want to think about, whether it happens to them or not--but in modern society, it’s all too common for the words “lay off” and “company downsize” to grace a conversation about how life is going.  Through an honest look at the emotions, feelings, and everyday challenges that can come with losing a job, author Heidi Barr illustrates what going through such an event is like. From disbelief to financial concerns to anxiety over the prospect of a two hour commute after ten years of working from home, this essay explores the uncertainty of not knowing what might be coming next, along with the potential for uncovering the beauty that might just be hidden under what feels like destruction.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Little Bound Books
• Release date: Mar 29, 2019
• ISBN: 9781938846632

Heidi Barr

Heidi Barr is a writer and wellness coach whose work is founded on a commitment to cultivating ways of being that are life-giving and sustainable for people, communities, and the planet. She lives with her family on Dakota land in rural Minnesota.

Book preview

1

This is the story of the time I lost my job. The story starts well before my last day with an employer of ten years, and it continues well after starting something new. It even continues after the last page you’ll turn in this book. Because the days continue to churn on, and many of them are just like any other ordinary day. But, as it turns out, all of these ordinary days, when strung together make up part of a human life. A life that is full of meaning, uncertainty, and the beautiful contrast that comes with being alive on the earth at this time in history. What comes next? None of us can ever know. We can only live the moments, from those full of beauty to those defined by destruction, as they unfold.

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October means it’s peak autumn color in Minnesota once again, and everywhere you look, it’s gorgeous. The leaves in the back of my house blaze yellow and orange, and they create an impressive reflection on the lake when the light is just so and the air is still. It’s kind of like the water is on fire with the vibrancy of the season. Of course, this time of intense beauty is fleeting, only lasting a few weeks each year, but then again, it does come back around every year. I just have to make a point to pay attention to it when it does show up. It’s always interesting to me that such intense beauty can co-exist so easily alongside the things that shake us to the core.

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October 19th I walked into my home office after a fabulous morning hiking with my young daughter, ready for a few hours of work before joining her and my spouse in the afternoon for more outside play time. Just as I was getting ready to dial into the weekly staff meeting, my phone rang, and I answered it since I saw it was my supervisor.

Hello, this is Heidi. How’s your day? I said, as that was my usual greeting.

Hello, Heidi. Thanks for taking this call today. We regret to inform you that as of December 2nd, your position is being eliminated.

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Late autumn marks the time of year I got the news that I was being laid off from my job of ten years. While this unexpected turn of events was certainly not a tragedy of the magnitude of trying to remake life in the aftermath of a hurricane or managing a chronic disease or seeing your home go up in flames or losing a child to violence, there have been some studies that show that when people lose a job, it leaves an impact as significant as losing a spouse. I’m not sure I totally buy that, despite what the statistics say, but I can see the parallels. We assign so much meaning to our work, it can feel like our identity and self-worth are stripped away when that job is lost. It feels like I should have been able to prevent it somehow. It invites feelings of inadequacy. And, let’s be honest, having