The Empath Self-Care Blueprint: How to Manage, Navigate, and Thrive in an Overwhelming World

By Nick Trenton

Defend and claim your space, say no to people, and compensate for your unique sensitivities.

The world is noisy, intense, and exhausting. For some, it feels like they are wearing hearing aids and binoculars, unable to hide, recharge, or shelter. This is no way to live.

Stop the feeling responsible for the emotions of everyone around you. Learn to say no and defend your own space.

The Empath Self-Care Blueprint is a book written for empaths by an empath. If you’ve ever felt too many emotional and sensory burdens, and struggled to breathe, this is the book for you. This book provides a much-needed sense of relief; it will bring you the relaxation and peace you so desperately seek.
You’ll first learn what makes you different, how you perceive the world differenly, and most importantly, how to live better and more happily. You’ll get a full blueprint about taking advantage of your gifts and also protecting yourself. Understand the double-edged sword that is the empath’s mind.

Tools for protecting yourself from sensory overload and exhaustion, and managing compassion fatigue.

Nick Trenton grew up in rural Illinois and is quite literally a farm boy. His best friend growing up was his trusty companion Leonard the dachshund. RIP Leonard. Eventually, he made it off the farm and obtained a BS in Economics, followed by an MA in Behavioral Psychology.

Practice self-care, self-protection, and learn to declare your boundaries and limits.

•Answer the question, “Why do I feel so intensely?”
•Differentiate between normal empathy, narcissists, introverts, highly sensitive people, and more.
•Learn to manage your energy as well as the people around you.
•Best practices for work, socializing, and even romance.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Publishdrive
• Release date: Jun 23, 2020
• ISBN: 9798655994713

Book preview

World

The Empath Self-Care Blueprint:

How to Manage, Navigate, and Thrive in an Overwhelming World

by Nick Trenton

www.NickTrenton.com

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Table of Contents

Chapter One. Diagnosing the Empath

Why do I feel so intensely?

Origins, Causes, and Journeys

The Double-Edged Sword

Chapter Two. Defining and Differentiating

Exponential Empathy

HSPs, Introverts, Codependents, and More

Too Little Versus Too Much

Chapter Three. Self-Awareness, Self-Protection, and Self-Care

Empathic Self-Protection

Energy Management

Warding off Fatigue

The Lurking Past

Chapter Four. Empath Survival Tactics

On Defending Your Needs

On Toxic Mismatches

On Partners

On Career

Chapter Five. How to Handle with Care

Summary Guide

Chapter One. Diagnosing the Empath

Maybe people constantly tell you to grow a thicker skin or to stop being so sensitive.

Maybe you’ve noticed how easily a negative person can completely throw your mood.

Maybe you avoid the news or scary movies because it’s as though you literally experience the fear of people on-screen.

If you’re like many sensitive or feeling oriented people, you may have stumbled on the label of empath and immediately felt validated—could being finely tuned to the emotions of others, slightly introverted, or complex emotionally be not only normal but even a good thing?

The world is quickly becoming enamored with what used to be a niche topic; today, empaths are speaking out, forming support groups, writing books, and sharing experiences online. More and more people are stepping up and claiming this—not to mention enterprising individuals now positioning themselves to offer expensive training courses, healing sessions, and self-help packages to sell to the growing number of people callings themselves empaths.

Spend any time researching this topic online, and you may quickly get confused. Some empaths treat their personalities almost as an enviable superpower, while others act as though their abilities are a terrible weakness that means they need to shield from others. Some empaths lump their characteristics with ESP or even psychic powers, like predicting the future. Others claim an intense bond with nature.

Some frame their experiences in relational terms, and point to the perils of getting involved with energy vampires and narcissists who would seek to take advantage of their emotional intelligence and generosity. On the other hand, critics of the entire concept have suggested that the label is pure fiction, and one that introverted people with mental health disorders are drawn to.

As the conversation around the special type of person we call an empath grows, more and more is seemingly added to the definition. You could be forgiven for asking, what is an empath really? And more importantly, are you one?

Let’s begin by trimming down to the basics on which everyone can agree—an empath is a person with a heightened capacity for empathy, or someone with the ability to feel the emotions of others.

Rather than merely understanding another person’s state of mind on an intellectual level, empaths seem to let more in, and can find themselves literally feeling the emotional reality of another person. This is a psychological definition rather than a spiritual or esoteric one, although it’s easy to imagine that the lines blur. Many empaths additionally describe themselves as extrasensory and intensely interested in psychic phenomena, spiritual matters, or learning to sense the emotions of even animal or extraterrestrial energies.

We can understand empaths as supremely emotionally intelligent in the way that some people are gifted with musical ability, or are born with heightened taste buds and become acclaimed chefs. An empath could be seen as more emotionally aware or more sensitive to emotional stimuli than the average person. Like an animal that can see in ultraviolet light or hear super high frequency sounds, an empath seems to inhabit a different world entirely—one dominated by felt experience, i.e. emotion.

Empaths have been described as excellent listeners and truly compassionate, generous people. Others describe their enormous ability to care about others; they’re gentle, perceptive and insightful people with a natural flair for understanding others—sometimes even better than they do themselves.

On the other hand, it’s this very ability to allow in the emotions of others that can overwhelm an empath, deplete them, or have them unable to discern whose feelings are whose! An empath without an understanding of their unique characteristics can quickly find themselves retreating from the world to recover, or worse, falling into relationships with people who would actively exploit and manipulate them, even as they try valiantly to rescue them. Yes, empaths can also be easily targeted by certain types of people because of their willingness to engage and feel.

Emotions are sadly afforded little attention or respect in our world today, a world that surely isn’t built for such an immersive experience. An empath can feel like they’re an alien in a foreign world, perceiving and being affected by things other people don’t comprehend. It’s understandable that people who identify primarily as emotional and empathic beings are happy to discover a term that describes their unique strengths not as a failure, but simply as another way of being.

Many empaths have struggled for years before having the courage to reframe their experiences and reclaim their unique ability to feel in a world that strongly discourages it. Putting a name to this term, and simply having the knowledge that they are far from alone, can be empowering and comforting.

But simply having a name for this special kind of person is not enough. If you identify as an empath, the question is, what next? Well, because we have a label, we can dictate a path for better living and taking advantage of this trait rather than falling victim to it. At first, we will be left with more questions than answers, but we will slowly work our way through the following in this book:

Is being an empath an inborn skill or something you can learn?

How is life different for an empath, and what does it mean to consider yourself one?

How do empaths get to be the way they are?

Are empaths really better than everyone else—more spiritually enlightened, kinder and so on?

What makes an empath happy and healthy?

What does an unhealthy empath look like? Do empaths suffer from anxiety and depression more?

Is being an empath the same as being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) or an introvert, or something completely different?

Does being an empath affect your career and your relationships, and if so, how?

Ultimately, what an empath is can vary widely depending on who you ask! In the chapters of this book we’ll consider all the many facets of being an empath to help you decide for yourself if identifying this way resonates with you. We’ll look at ways to decide if you are an empath, learn skills to enhance your strengths and mitigate your weaknesses, and learn how to communicate your needs and experiences to other people. We’ll take a look at some aspects of the discussion that are a little more controversial, and answer the above question and more. The first question we’ll look at is the obvious one—are you an empath?

Why do I feel so intensely?

The first thing to understand is that being an empath is a relatively new idea, and there are no fixed, standardized definitions available (yet?). Though people throughout history have had different ways of talking about sensitive, delicate, ultra-compassionate or perceptive people, the term empath is only a few years old, and most are unfamiliar with the term. It’s not a diagnosis, psychiatric or otherwise, and many people simply decide that if the description fits, then they are happy to think of themselves as empaths.

That said, more and more mental health experts are weighing in on the idea, with the most prominent perhaps being Dr. Judith Orloff, an American psychiatrist who wrote the influential book The Empath’s Survival Guide in 2017. Since then, content has sprung up everywhere to talk about what an empath is, how to identify them, and how to survive. Even neurosurgeons have been investigating the claims of empaths to determine whether they actually differ in the way their brains function. There are a few real biological differences between the brains of introverts and extroverts, so it may not be surprising that the brain of the empathetic is different as well.

What follows is a list of traits, experiences, beliefs, feelings, capacities, and idiosyncrasies that seem common to most empaths, but it’s important to remember one thing: these lists are not definitive