Things I Forgot To Say At My Funeral

By David Halliday

Thoughts on a life well attended. I may have been tardy but I was awake.
'I wish I was handsomer. I wish I was taller. I wish my bank account would grow. I wish I didn’t
smoke. I wish I didn’t forget so many things. That’s right, I don’t smoke. I wish I was smarter. (Is
that even possible?) I wish I’d met Trudeau. (Pierre) I wish I’d been more successful. And my parents
could have seen it. I wish a lot of things that I don’t really care about it. Someday I’m going to wish
I was alive. '

• Language: English
• Publisher: David Halliday
• Release date: May 17, 2020
• ISBN: 9780463113998

David Halliday

I have published poems, short stories, plays, art works in reviews and publications across the United States and Canada. I have several published books:murder by Coach House Press. This book is a series of poems and illustrations set up like scenes in a movie, describing the murder, trial, and mob execution of an innocent man. Winner of the 2001 Eppie for poetry.The Black Bird by. The Porcupine’s Quill. This is a book of poems, illustrations and short prose pieces describing the fictional making of the John Huston film, The Maltese Falcon.Making Movies by Press Porcepic. This is a book of long poems, interviews, short fiction pieces about a fictional BBC documentary about a fictional Canadian film maker, Samuel Bremmer and his company of actors and colleagues. It follows his career through the creation of a series of his movies.Church Street is Burning, a book of poems, was a finalist in the 2002 Eppie for poetry.The God of Six Points, published by Double-dragon-ebooks. A man who believes he is a god believes he has murdered one of his subjects.Sleeping Beauty, published by LTD ebooks.com is a murder mystery. A woman lands in a small village where the only escape is to be murdered. Finalist in the 2003 Dream Realm Awards. Winner of the 2004 IP Book Awards.The Hole, published by LTD ebooks is one in a series of cop stories. There are unusual happenings in the quiet suburb of Islington. People have begun to disappear. And they have been disappearing for generations. For the soon to retire Sam Kelly, this is his last case as a detective. All the clues point to a mysterious hole, which appears to have no bottom.In 2007 I was short listed for the C.B.C. Literary Contest in poetry.

Book preview

THINGS I FORGOT TO SAY AT MY FUNERAL

By David Halliday

Suspicion

1. I wish I was handsomer. I wish I was taller. I wish my bank account would grow. I wish I didn’t

smoke. I wish I didn’t forget so many things. That’s right, I don’t smoke. I wish I was smarter. (Is

that even possible?) I wish I’d met Trudeau. (Pierre) I wish I’d been more successful. And my parents

could have seen it. I wish a lot of things that I don’t really care about it. Someday I’m going to wish

I was alive.

2. I’ve always had problems with beds. In university we slept on beds that were standardized for all. If

you were about 5 feet tall and thin as a pencil. But the beds were firm. You could place a glass of beer

on the bed and it would not spill a drop.  No matter how much activity there was. After college I slept

on a lot of mattresses. On floors. Which were fine until you woke up the next morning. With a

hangover. And had to drag yourself up to your feet. Then I moved in with a girl. Who had a brass bed.

Single. I had to lace my arms through the bars at the head or I would have fallen out during the night.

My wife and I share a king size bed. But my wife, sweet and loving when she is awake, turns into a

Napoleon when asleep. She must have all the blankets. I remember my first bed. Bought for me. By

my folks. It had a little shelf for books at the head, and a place for a radio. And there was a light. And

it fit me to a tee. No wonder I never wanted to grow up.

First Medieval Time Machine

3. A girl I