Secrets

By Victoria E. Kühnhardt

After her parents die in a car crash, Posy Walters moves to San Francisco to live with her new guardian family, the Farmers. Her world is not only turned upside down after Alex Farmer leads her into a world full of colours, but also when she discovers a mysterious box in the Farmer's cellar. From that moment henceforth, everything changes…

• Language: English
• Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
• Release date: Jul 31, 2018
• ISBN: 9781786129086

Victoria E. Kühnhardt

Victoria E Kühnhardt was born in Germany in 1996. She has, with her German father, Hungarian mother and younger brother, lived in many different places around the world, including Washington DC, Stanford, Brisbane, Seoul and Oxford. During her school year in Oxford in 2005, Victoria's passion for writing started to blossom. She finished her High School in Bonn and completed her studies in English and Primary School Teaching at the Catholic University of Eichstätt-Ingolstadt in Bavaria. She plans on subsequently doing her Master's Degree in Creative Writing in the UK. Besides previously published short stories, Secrets is Victoria's first novel.

Book preview

1999

About the Author

Victoria E Kühnhardt was born in Germany in 1996. She has, with her German father, Hungarian mother and younger brother, lived in many different places around the world, including Washington DC, Stanford, Brisbane, Seoul and Oxford. During her school year in Oxford in 2005, Victoria’s passion for writing started to blossom. She finished her High School in Bonn and completed her studies in English and Primary School Teaching at the Catholic University of Eichstätt-Ingolstadt in Bavaria. She plans on subsequently doing her Master’s Degree in Creative Writing in the UK. Besides previously published short stories, Secrets is Victoria’s first novel.

Dedication

For Clara

Copyright Information ©

    Victoria E Kühnhardt (2018)

The right of Victoria E Kühnhardt to be identified as author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance with section 77 and 78 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission of the publishers.

Any person who commits any unauthorised act in relation to this publication may be liable to criminal prosecution and civil claims for damages.

A CIP catalogue record for this title is available from the British Library.

ISBN 9781788237642 (Paperback)

ISBN 9781528902267 (Hardback)

ISBN 9781528902274 (E-Book)

www.austinmacauley.com

First Published (2018)

Austin Macauley Publishers Ltd™

25 Canada Square

Canary Wharf

London

E14 5LQ

Acknowledgements

I would herewith like to thank my family and friends, who have always and unconditionally supported me throughout the creation of this novel. Secrets would have never been possible without your help, ideas and endless discussions. Furthermore, I am thankful for the Austin Macauley Team, who have done an incredible job and have given me the opportunity of pursuing my lifelong dream of becoming a published author.

Chapter 1

It was a beautiful day as I was packing my things to go away and probably never return. I didn’t want to return. It would only remind me of what had happened, and I wanted to erase those memories completely.

You must know my parents died in a car crash about a week ago. They were killed immediately. And now I am supposed to go and live with friends of theirs in California and I don’t even know them. It was an awkward feeling going to complete strangers. I had never even heard about them until the police told me.

So as I said before, I was packing my belongings on this way too sunny day. My neighbours were going to drive me to the airport in Washington DC in about an hour and I was still not ready with anything. I just threw all my clothes into my luggage and didn’t care about how messy it looked. I just wanted to get it over with and try to forget. I was never really a very emotional girl that would cry about stuff, I didn’t even cry at their funeral. My parents and I didn’t have that great of a relationship because they were always travelling around the world. I had a kind of nanny, but when she found out that they were dead, she left without saying a word, and I never saw her again. There was not much that I would miss here except, maybe, the city. That was about it. I’d never really had that many friends either and the ones I had, turned their backs on me after they found out what had happened. No big loss though. So there was just miserable me and my cat, Muffles. He was the only one I had left.

I walked out of my room into our now empty house. All our furniture got picked up and put somewhere; I don’t know where. I walked down the big hallway and looked in every room as if I was trying to find something that wasn’t there. Maybe real parents that took care of their daughter and didn’t always leave her home alone with the weird nanny. Sometimes, I think I happened by accident. My parents sent me a card once in a while, but they always forgot my birthday and were never home for Christmas, ever. I had a weird childhood growing up without parents, toys or anything. Maybe that was why I behaved the way I did. A miserable and small-minded girl. I wasn’t that smart in school either. More the average type.

Maybe it was somehow good for me to get out of all this and expand my little view of the world. Maybe it was a new beginning and I could start all over again and just try to forget about my past.

It was almost time for me to go when the phone rang.

Posy Walters here, hello?

Hi, this is Carrington Farmer. I heard the soft and friendly voice of a woman.

My husband and I will be your guardians from now on. I was just checking to see if everything was all right and at what time your plane will land in San Francisco.

Oh, hi! Yes, everything is all right, thank you, and my plane will land at 7:30 p.m. And I have a question. Would it be okay if I took my cat with me? He is used to running around in nature, though, so if you’re in the middle of the city— a sudden friendliness overcame me.

Oh, no, no, we live in a house surrounded by a garden and there’s a forest nearby. I hope you’ll find it as comfortable here as we do. Is there anything else I should know about, like allergies or medicine you take?

No. I am all-good. And thank you.

You’re welcome. Well, I am looking forward to seeing you at the airport then.

So am I.

Good bye, Posy.

Bye. I hung up. She seemed nice, but you never know.

The doorbell rang and my neighbours helped me to load my entire luggage into the back of the car. We had to stuff some on the back seat and I took Muffles on my lap in his portable cage.

As we finally managed to close all the doors, Mr Meladen broke the silence.

So you’re going to San Francisco now. That’s great! They say they always have good weather over there. He seemed shy, just like his wife, Mrs Meladen, who sat quietly next to him. Probably he didn’t really know what to say because of what had happened.

Yeah. I hope so. None of us said anything more during the whole drive.

I looked out of the window and was wondering why I was suddenly being so friendly, especially to Mrs Farmer. I didn’t even know her. It was a whole new side of me that I didn’t know was there, but what I did know was that it wouldn’t hold on for long. That was just so not like me.

The trees at the side of the road were rushing by, the sky turned into grey and suddenly, it began to rain. That was more like the weather it should have been. The weather reflected my mood. I didn’t know why, but for some reason I did feel a little bit sad now that I left. But whatever.

After we arrived at the airport and loaded my entire luggage onto two trolleys, it was time to say good-bye. Both Mr and Mrs Meladen came up to me and gave me a hug, and I think Mrs Meladen even cried a little. Maybe they were really nice neighbours after all. I just never noticed because I was so shut in my own little mind.

I made my way to the check-ins and turned around to wave. Now I could see that she was crying. Even I – the unemotional girl that I was – felt my eyes going watery. I rubbed them and went faster until I was sure that they couldn’t see me anymore.

Anxious, as I had never been at an airport before, I went to the check-in and through the security areas until I could finally relax at my gate. It was all much easier than I had thought it would be. I felt more and more relieved as the time to board the plane got nearer. I even got a little excited and I knew that through all this a new person was awaking inside of me and that I was wrong earlier. My happiness and friendliness didn’t go away. I was going on my own adventure. An adventure to another place and an adventure to find out what was inside of me and had been hidden in there all those 15 years. It suddenly all came out at once – totally taking my breath away. It was really quite creepy. A few minutes ago, I was so miserable like I always had been and now I felt like a really happy girl!

Suddenly, a stewardess called us all up to board and I was ripped out of my thoughts. In the plane, I took my seat at the window and a sudden anxiety came shaking through my body as I realised that I would soon be flying up in the air. It was a frightening thought to be so far off the ground.

A couple sat next to me and they seemed really relaxed. I took that as a sign of safety and settled in my seat. Already, the plane set in action and suddenly, I found myself flying between clouds and air. It was a terrific feeling. I got out my camera and took the first picture of my new life.

Chapter 2

I felt a gentle hand on my shoulder and I realised it was the lady sitting next to me waking me up because I had fallen asleep. According to her, we had arrived. I immediately looked out the window and it was actually sunny! Mr Meladen was right. I squeezed out into the hallway of the plane and got out my hand luggage from the storage above our heads. Everybody pushed and shoved the people out of their way to get to their hand luggage and I was happy I only had my small handbag with my essentials. I tried to get out as fast as I could and not to get squashed. As I got closer to the luggage claim, the excitement grew and I couldn’t wait to meet my guardians and to get to know them. I was shy meeting new people, but I hoped this Posy, with her new attributes, would be more talkative and integrate fast.

I got two trolleys and collected my entire luggage. As before at the airport in DC, it was quite a struggle pushing both trolleys, but I managed it somehow. As I got to the waiting hall, I got more nervous than I thought I would be and all those thoughts went crushing through my mind. Would they be nice to me? Would I be able to settle in? Was Muffles going to like it there? Oh no. Muffles! I totally forgot to go and pick him up! I tried to go back through the door I came out of, but it was locked from this side. Shit! I tried to find an employee, but there was no one around and then I saw her. Carrington Farmer. She was holding up a sign that said ‘Posy Walters’ in big, red, bold letters. I always imagined Mrs Farmer to be a small and skinny woman, but she was taller than me – but then everybody is taller than me – and was quite corpulent. Not on her tummy but all around. She smiled as she saw me coming and I had to smile back. She seemed so friendly and kind that I just had to.

Hello, Posy, she said, giving me a big, warming hug that almost squished me to death. I had not been that close to another person for a long time. It was, in a way, overwhelming.

Hi, Mrs Farmer.

Oh you can call me Carrie. And let me help you with your luggage, dear.

Oh thank you… eh… Carrie. We turned around to head out through the exit when I remembered Muffles.

I told you about my cat, right? Well, it seems that I forgot to pick him up and now I can’t go back through the door. I pointed to where I came from.

Oh that is no problem, dear. We can go to the security and I am sure they can help us.

Carrie took a trolley and we made our way to find a security guard. My nervousness seemed childish after all. A few minutes later, we found a nice security man and explained the situation to him; it didn’t take long until I had Muffles back in my arms.

Thank you so much! I said touching Carrie’s arm. Such an unusual movement of me to make. Then we made our way to the parking area. There I saw her opening the doors of a huge black jeep and I was happy to see a big car because I was sure now that my entire luggage would fit in. This time, I sat in the front and Muffles was put down to my feet.

Did you have a good flight, Posy? Carrie asked in her sweet and gentle voice.

I did. It was actually my first time flying.

Oh that must have been very exciting then. I nodded. Suddenly, Carrie looked at me from the corner of her eyes.

Posy, I am really sorry for what happened. We will try and make your time here as pleasant as we all can and if you need anything, just ask.

Oh that is… um… okay. My parents and I never really had that close of a relationship actually. They were always away because of their job.

I see. Carrie looked at me as if she was really sorry, and I knew she was.

But thank you. I think I will like it here, I said to warm up the stiffness. Carrie smiled at me and we kept on talking about more pleasant things. She told me that her husband’s name was Max and that he worked as a bank clerk. So did Carrie. She also told me that she had a son named Alex who turned 17 in May, so two months before my birthday. I also found out that he was quite the athlete. He played soccer, basketball and baseball. That was pretty impressive. Compared to Alex, I seemed rather boring. I didn’t have any hobbies except reading and listening to music. In my miserable life that I had left behind, I now seemed like a real bore.

I looked out of the window and realised that San Francisco was so different from DC. It was a good difference. I already liked it here. It looked so beautiful because the sun was setting. But at the same time, the sun was still shining brightly. It felt like as if the world was turning golden for just a moment. It was so beautiful. I sighed. And smiled. And just felt happy.

I looked to the side and met Carrie’s smiling eyes. I noticed she had pretty big brown deer eyes. They almost looked like chocolate to me. Her hair was dark blonde and went down to her chin. I was suddenly wondering how Max and Alex were going to look like. Did Alex have the same body frame as Carrie? Probably not, if he did that many sports. Silly me. I was just going to have to wait and see. We drove into a wide street and entered the Farmer’s neighbourhood. The place I was going to stay from now on. It was a very pretty suburban neighbourhood with those typical white picket fences. It all looked very inviting. Like from one of those countryside-living-magazine sort of things.

There we are! Carrie said happily, parking in front of a huge white house. It was double the size of my old house and had huge windows on the ground floor. A lovely garden with roses and other colourful flowers embellished the front of the house. I saw a figure standing in one of the big front windows, but could not recognise him or her. Either Max or Alex I guessed. I got out of the car and helped Carrie load all my stuff onto the front porch. I liked front porches. When I was smaller, I always wanted to build a front porch for our house, but Nanny always told me not to do so. She was always like my own bad stepmother and I was Cinderella. I had a feeling she only ever took care of me – or pretended she would – to get her money. We almost got all my things out of the car as the front door suddenly got ripped open and a tall man with black hair that had a hint of greyness in it and green eyes stood in the door. Max. He came running towards me and hugged me so tight, I was almost not able to breathe. I smiled shyly.

There you are, Posy! Alex and I were so curious to finally meet you. Your parents always told us so much about you! That was funny because my parents had never mentioned them. So I just smiled. I noticed somebody moving behind Max and noticed a tall boy with dark blonde hair and shining blue eyes. This had to be Alex. He came to the front and smiled at me. I didn’t know what to do. Give him my hand? Hug him? But I just chose to not do anything until he made the first move. I never had any contact with boys and didn’t know how to behave around them. Probably society expected me to be all flirty, but that was just so not me.

For a girl that just lost her parents, you seem really happy, he said with a grin and gave me his hand. Alex had a strong handshake and really warm hands compared to mine. My hands had always been very cold.

Alex, please! Carrie said and apologised for her son’s behaviour. I smiled, again! They seemed such a happy and normal family. But what did I know about being normal?

Alex and Max helped us to carry my luggage into my new room and I realised that their house wasn’t only big from the outside, but also from the inside. They had a huge entrance hall that led to the living room through huge glass wing doors. To the right was a lovely kitchen and to the left was a small bathroom, a cloakroom and the stairs that led up to the first floor. Through the doors that led to the living room, I was able to look outside into their enormous garden and was able to catch a glimpse of a pool. I couldn’t stop being astonished. It was just amazing. We went up the staircase into a wide hallway. It had three doors to the left, two to the right and one door that was straight ahead of us at the end of the hallway. Alex opened the door of the first room to the left that was going to be my room from now on. It was a beautiful room with white walls and again huge windows from where you could see the garden. In the room was a huge wardrobe that was probably three times the size of my old one. There was also a big desk with a computer on it and a huge and comfy-looking bed. It had light purple coloured sheets. It was just perfect.

I hope you like it, Max said and put the luggage down in front of the wardrobe.

Yes, it is just perfect. Alex laughed and put his set of luggage next to the ones Max had put down. Carrie and I did the same.

Across from your room is your own personal bathroom. Alex emptied it just for you, Max said. He seemed pleased.

Oh, but you didn’t have to do that, Alex.

No, that’s fine. Mom’s and Dad’s bathroom is big enough. I did not quite believe him.

Um… Okay. We will leave you alone now so you can unpack and do what you need to do. We will have dinner at nine. Is that fine with you, Posy? Carrie said.

Sure. That is great! I really did think it was good, because I was really hungry now.

Great! Just come down to the living room. And if you need anything, just let one of us know. She winked at me and the three of them left my room, and I started unpacking my stuff.

Of course, the wardrobe was way too big for all of my things. That was okay though because now I could even put my books in it and didn’t have to line them up on the floor, like I used to. It’s not like my parents and I were poor, but the money nanny got for making my life pleasant got wasted in different ways. For a minute, I just sat there on the floor, closed my eyes and breathed in the new air. It was such a good feeling being in a real family now. It made me feel secure for the first time in my life.

I put all my clothes neatly into the wardrobe and placed the books and other stuff into the free places. I was finally able to let Muffles out of his portable cage and let him out through the window onto the terrace. He was more of a loner cat and sometimes left the house for days if not even weeks.

Now there I was, in this new environment. I still couldn’t believe that DC had suddenly become my past and that I would probably never return. San Francisco would be my new home from now on and I hoped that there would be a drastic change to my old, boring life. While I was contemplating about my new life, time passed quite quickly and then it was finally nine o’clock. My tummy hadn’t stopped grumbling for the last half