Lord I hear You: How To Listen to God When You Need Him Most

By Connie Spearman

How different would your life be if you knew exactly how to hear God's voice? If you were absolutely certain that dream, that inner voice, that stranger on the street with an encouraging word were all actually God speaking to you?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Constance Spearman
• Release date: Feb 5, 2023
• ISBN: 9789692992565

Book preview

How To Listen to God When

You Need Him Most

Copyright © 2022 Connie Spearman.

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the publisher’s express written permission except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I want to acknowledge all the beautiful people who have profoundly impacted my life and the woman I've become.

To my mother Mildred Williams, I am a warrior and a conqueror of everything that was meant to harm me because of your resilience and tenacity. You were such a great mother, and grandmother. Your presence is missed. I love you.

To Aunt Johnnie Mae Wright who was like a second mother to me and my siblings. You were loving, nurturing, and kind. You were always willing to sacrifice for others. You watched over us and cared for us like we were your very own children, and we honor you.

To Aunt Ora, thank you for teaching me lessons about discipline and cleanliness. I love you and will never forget you.

To Willa Mae Rice, thank you for showing me what a powerful woman of faith looks like.

To Carla Snow, my spiritual Mother, thank you for being a great teacher, guide, and prayer warrior for me over the years. I’ve matured in my spiritual walk because you were there to hold my hand.

To my Pittsburgh Platinum Girls, my sisters from another mother, I love you all to life.

To Jackie, Rosalind, Diane, Sandra, Charlotte, Colleen, Robert, Stanford, Gary, Darrell, and Junior -- growing up with you has been a blast. Because of you, all my life has been filled with laughter, love, and joy! There is never a dull moment. I love that even after all these years, we still playfully pick with each other! I adore you all.

To my son who keeps me on my knees and my toes. I will always love you no matter what.

To my grandchildren and great-grandchildren, you are my delight. I am so grateful to God for blessing me with you all.

CONTENTS

Prologue      1

Last Thoughts      137

About The Author      139

Prologue

"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold

story inside you." - Maya Angelou

This moment has been a long time coming for me. For the past 15 years, I’ve felt the burden of the Lord telling me to write this book. I’ve resisted in every way imaginable. I’ve procrastinated, made excuses, and tried to ignore the calling altogether. But the Holy Spirit has been relentless, making sure that I understood that this was a great assignment given to me by the Lord.

The Holy Spirit has revealed that these stories will bless a generation. This book is not about me, it is a collection of testimonies that prove that no matter what you are going through, God is the answer, and he can bring you out. I pray that you are blessed.

Lord may these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock, and my Redeemer.

Amen.

With love,

Minister Connie Spearman.

1

Confusion

"A single event can awaken within us a stranger

unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born."

- Antoine de Saint Exupéry

A

s the airplane’s wheels descended and skidded across the concrete, I reached for my cell phone. I powered it back on and waited as notifications flooded my inbox. I sifted through all the new messages; I didn’t see anything that I needed to tend to right away.

The flight attendant was now welcoming us back to Pittsburgh, and I was glad to be home. It was a bit chilly…low of 40 degrees. Pretty normal for this time of year in Pennsylvania, but a vast difference from the beautiful Miami sun I had spent the past week basking in.

As we taxied up to our gate, other passengers sprang back to life. They were scrambling to unbuckle their seatbelts and racing to open the overhead bins to collect their belongings so they could dash off the plane as soon as the pilot said we could deboard. I was just as eager as everyone else, but I moved a little slower than most. I had flown to Florida to undergo a medical procedure and I was still a bit sore. It was a successful trip, but I was completely exhausted. It felt good to finally be home again. I looked forward to collapsing on my bed for a good night’s rest.

The beep notification on my phone interrupted my daydream. We’re here. Just call me after you get your bags, the text message said.

Okay, I replied. That was my ex-husband, Frank, telling me that he and his current wife, Lena, were waiting for me. Originally, the plan was for my son Marcus to pick me up from the airport, but Frank was against it. You know you can’t depend on Marcus. You’ll be sitting at the airport all night. I’m coming to get you!

He was concerned about me standing or waiting at the airport especially after having surgery. That was Frank. He was always there to pick up the pieces for me, no matter what.

I met Frank in 1993. I was in the market for my first rental property. He was the owner of a string of duplexes and homes I had my eye on. I approached him about a duplex that he listed for sale. After going through the process, we discovered that I could not purchase the duplex because of my status as a first-time home buyer.

But Frank was determined to help me. He offered to sell me one side of the duplex and even took $10,000 off the asking price. I was sold on the duplex, but not the romantic advances that came soon after.

Frank was a really nice guy, and most women would have found him to be a dream catch. I liked him ok, but I didn’t like that he was twenty years older than me. I had my experiences with older men, and they were not a good fit for me.

I still remember the day, he asked me to be his girlfriend Make me happy by being with me and you’ll never want for anything again, he said.

And he did just that. Frank and I had a lot of great memories. We traveled the world together. He made sure I had everything I hoped for or dreamed of—just as he promised. We were always great friends, but not a great married couple.

The marriage ended several years later. Despite our divorce, our friendship remained. We were very close, even after he remarried. I knew I could always count on him. We no longer lived under one roof as a couple, but neither one of us could stand by and do nothing if the other was in need.

Frank loaded my luggage into the car. Lena greeted me with a cheerful Welcome back. The three of us were pretty good friends. There was nothing awkward about our relationship. Lena and Frank insisted I sit in the front passenger seat so I could be more comfortable. I tried to put up a fight by protesting, but I was outnumbered. I finally gave up and we all climbed into the car. Frank cruised in and out of airport traffic before finally merging onto the highway, and heading toward my neighborhood. I asked Frank to make a quick detour and swing by the mall so I could dash into my hair salon. I needed to get my eyebrows waxed and have my lashes applied. I had a big speaking engagement at an upcoming spiritual women’s conference, and I wanted to look my best.

It was late in the evening, almost eight o’clock. Traffic was light so I got in and out of the mall quickly. With all my last-minute tasks taken care of, we were back on course and en route to drop me off at my home.

Frank kept his eyes straight ahead as we made our way up the hill. We were less than a mile away from my house. I glanced over at the speedometer, but I didn’t need numbers and gauges to tell me we were going fast--too fast.

Uh, Frank don’t you think you’re going kind of fast?

Yeah.

Suddenly, everything went black. I could hear voices, but I wasn’t conscious. I heard my friend Spence’s voice. I know her. Can I have her cell phone to call her family?

I heard a woman repeating my name over and over again. I felt nothing. It was as if my body was floating. Constance, are you with us? I used all the strength I could muster to force my eyes open. Aaaah, I thought to myself, now I can see who’s talking to me and see what is happening. That sense of relief quickly faded as I found myself staring back at all these faces and not recognizing any of them.

My mind was racing and full of questions-- Who are all these people? How do they know my name? And why do they keep talking in hushed, controlled tones like they are trying to keep me from freaking out? I was so confused, everything around me seemed to be going so fast. I couldn’t get my bearings or figure out what was happening. My thoughts were so scattered, and my limbs were so heavy. I felt so tired… so very, very sleepy that I can’t, cannn..kee…keep ey…eyes…can’t stayyy awwwakeee. I struggled as hard as I could to keep my eyes open until I couldn’t any longer-- I passed out.

When I could finally open my eyes again, my mind was still tangled in this web of confusion and unfamiliarity. I was frantically trying to process where I was and what was happening, but my thoughts were just so jumbled. My eyes were open, but nothing computed; everything around me seemed hazy and strange. I drifted in and out of consciousness for several hours.

Connie…I’m here, a voice that I recognized called out to me. My sister, Diane, and my son were standing over me asking if I remembered what happened.

I was extremely groggy and disoriented. I was fighting hard to get my bearings and to get a grip on reality so I could understand what was going on.

How are my eyelashes? I asked. One of the last things I remembered was going to the salon to have false eyelashes applied so I could get ready for my speech at the conference. It was like my brain