Twenty Old Summers

By Anya Mérimèche

"It will all go downhill once you hit the twenty bar, you'll see," the prophecy said. Inside this collection lay the tribulations of a soon-to-be twenty-year-old, on her Utopian quest to fight off ticking clocks and clicking locks. Twenty slam poems and ten essays of emotional highs and lows.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
• Release date: May 31, 2019
• ISBN: 9789948373650

Anya Mérimèche

Anya Mérimèche is a twenty-one-year-old law student. She published her first novel in 2012, back when she was fifteen, thus making her the youngest Algerian writer.

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Words

About the Author

Anya Mérimèche is a twenty-one-year-old law student. She published her first novel in 2012, back when she was fifteen, thus making her the youngest Algerian writer.

About the Book

It will all go downhill once you hit the twenty bar, you'll see, the prophecy said.

Inside this collection lay the tribulations of a soon-to-be twenty-year-old, on her

Utopian quest to fight off ticking clocks and clicking locks.

Twenty slam poems and ten essays of emotional highs and lows.

Dedication

To my parents, with love;

To my friends, with gratitude;

To January, with apology.

Copyright Information

Copyright © Anya Mérimèche (2019)

The right of Anya Mérimèche to be identified as author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance with Federal Law No. (7) of UAE, Year 2002, Concerning Copyrights and Neighboring Rights.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior permission of the publishers.

Any person who commits any unauthorized act in relation to this publication may be liable to legal prosecution and civil claims for damages.

ISBN 978-9948-37-366-7 (Paperback)

ISBN 978-9948-37-365-0 (E-Book)

Application Number: MC-02-01-5439847

Age Classification: 17+

The age group that matches the content of the books has been classified according to the age classification system issued by the National Media Council.

Printer Name:

Masar Printing & Publishing LLC

Printer Address:

Dubai, UAE

First Published (2019)

AUSTIN MACAULEY PUBLISHERS FZE

Sharjah Publishing City

P.O Box [519201]

Sharjah, UAE

www.austinmacauley.ae

[phone]

"I am no prince

I am no saint

And if that’s what you believe you need

You’re wrong – you don’t need much

You need someone to fall back on…"

Jason Robert Brown

DISCLAIMER

Unlike what Selma Benameur might think, this is not a diary.

Twenty

Two,

Oh, how I used to long for you!

Freedom and adulthood

For a frustrated thirteen-year-old

Unjustifiably furious and misunderstood

God, it sounded so good!

Twenty, oh

You’re getting closer by the minute

It’s solstice, in nine we’ll be meeting

To an age of maturity it seems I’m headed

I feel I’m closer to the ceiling

A new decade with many a high stake

No more teen-shaped candles on my birthday cake.

Nineteen plus one

Excuses are to be abandoned right here

From now on, you’re an adult, kid

Your issues will no longer magically disappear

It’s time you got out of your crib.

It’s all downhill from here,

Someone said.

My chest, suddenly swollen with fear

Made me want to blow off my head.

Two times ten

Wow, that looks like a lot of years!

I didn’t notice how far I’ve gotten

Nor how fast a spinning Earth has brought me here

My infant fruits are deeply rotten

Dusty milestones progressively forgotten

Snapshots of a life to be recalled often

Numerous growing to many a dozen

Proof that I’ve already been here a while.

Twenty

I can already tell the system’s waiting for me

With its insatiable hunger for workaholics

Pay the tax and pay the fee

Welcome to adulthood basics

Constantly stressed out and permanently rushing

Soon, I’ll be so tired, I won’t even have time to dream

So worn out, I’ll start compensating for snippets of happiness

Desperate for a break to let out some steam

On the lookout, searching for quietness.

Twenty

The tomboy is gone

So is the insufferable know-it-all

Soon, a sophisticated woman is to be born.

Twenty

And love hasn’t properly knocked on my door just yet

I’m not that good at finding soulmates

I don’t fall in love, I fall on my face

Unfamiliar with relationships patiently paced

I usually fall for broken people who make me laugh

But they never stay

None of them was my missing half

And the ones who do stick around, I take for granted anyway.

Twenty odd summers

My bouquet isn’t one I’m comfortable with

Some of my roses are very dehydrated

When questioned, I often plead the fifth

Not so keen on having my roses debated.

Twenty short summers

I still feel I’m an infant

A true life-lover

Greedy, I hoarder every instant

In anguish to when it’ll be over.

I’m scared of turning twenty

But I’ll get over it eventually.

It’s a beautiful summer night

One of many to come hopefully.

Definition

I’m not the size of jeans I wear

I’m not the amount of skin I lay bare

I thought I was the amount of books I read in a year

But even that doesn’t define me, I fear.

I guess I’m the sandcastles I destroy at the beach

Just because I know they’re too fragile to survive anyway

I live inside dreamlands that are beyond my reach

I put shackles around my ankles to force my stay.

The way boys look at me isn’t enough anymore

I need them to talk now

I’m hungry for content, for people who make sense somehow

Otherwise, it’s stewing in a static bore.

Guess there’s some part of me in gloomy mornings

Still, threatening, silently present

Like full gray clouds when they descend

I, too, start to cry without warnings.

His gorgeousness satisfies me no longer

I’m done chasing mannequins

I’ve developed new cravings

I want poetry and meaningful discussions about the meaningless

I want out of my restlessness

But that’s eventually where I end up, one way or another.

Cars going very fast

Love stories