Mario's Talk October 4, 2019

By Mario V. Farina

Mario V. Farina gave a talk to a group of retired New York State Workers on October 4, 2019. Mario is 96, a veteran of World War II. He retired at age 90 from the New York State Department of Labor. This story tells of humorous events that occurred in his life. You'll find some of the very funny. If you do not agree, state so here and he'll really retire!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Mario V. Farina
• Release date: Oct 5, 2019
• ISBN: 9780463561218

Mario V. Farina

Mario V Farina has worked all his life, from age 18 to 90. He worked for the American Locomotive Company, served in the U. S. Army during WWII, was employed at General Electric. He taught computers at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute. After leaving his position with RPI, he became employed with the State Labor Department of New York. He’s a car buff, a pun creator, and a computer enthusiast. He wrote textbooks for the programming languages COBOL and FORTRAN and wrote a book of puns and short stories called, “A Little Light Reading,” as well as over 20 other books. Several of his books were translated into other languages. This is his first foray into the world of digital publishing, with the help of his computer tutor ([e-mail]).

Book preview

Mario’s Talk

October 4, 2019

By

Mario V. Farina

Copyright 2019 Mario V. Farina, Smashwords Edition, License Notes. All Rights Reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without prior written permission of the author.

Correspondence may be directed to:

Mario V. Farina, email: [e-mail]

Mario’s Talk

October 4, 2019

By

Mario V. Farina

Table of Contents

A Pun in Italian 1

An Educational First Date 2

Fun at the American Locomotive Company 4

Giving a Haircut 6

Discovered Under the Carpet! 8

Arriving in India and China 10

The Car was Brought Home in Pieces 14

The IQ Test 15

How are the Seats? 17

A Mouse in the House 19

The Little Old Lady 22

Falling Into a New Job 23

Not Enough Experience 29

If it Starts, We Go? 31

Playing a Joke on Jeff 33

Hair Blowing Off 35

Beaucoup Money 37

One Thousand Letters to a New Job 39

The Lie 41

Learning Inline Skating 42

I’ve Scalped Him 44

Retiring at Age 90 46

1928: A Pun in Italian

-5-

It was around 1928. I was about five years old. We spoke Italian in the family. I didn't know a word of English. But I was already a punster. My father was scolding me one day for something that I had done wrong. I was making an attempt to defend myself. When I raise my voice to speak, my dad put his right index finger to his lips and whispered, "mosca, which was colloquial family language, for the word, silence". But it also had another meaning, fly - a noun - meaning the kind of fly that buzzes around. Audaciously, I looked around the room, and said in Italian, Where is it?

I think my dad was surprised. It may have been the first time I used the pun in my life. He appeared stunned, not knowing what to do or say. In the meantime I quivered with fear. Was I in for a rough punishment of some sort? After a moment, a smile covered his face, he laughed. The scolding was over!

1941: An Educational First Date

-18-

It was around 1941. I was 18. I had just graduated from Mount Pleasant High School in Schenectady, New York. I thought it might be time to start dating. My parents didn't necessarily agree with that, but we discussed it,