The Merchant of Venus & Other Stories

By George Stenson

Six short stories of love, magic, sex, and delusion. From a part-time store clerk looking for love to a woman made from a male body part to a man possibly on his death bed but believing he is in love.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tedorigawa Bookmakers
• Release date: Oct 20, 2018
• ISBN: 9781386374893

George Stenson

George Stenson was born in Santa Fe, New Mexico but now lives in the island nation of Japan. He managed to hoodwink a diploma from the University of Washington (BA) and Hollins College (MA).

Book preview

Dedicated to

MKM

And all the People who Enjoy Short Fiction

Cover photo by

Lode Van de Velde

http://lode.weebly.com

Slow Arc Into Asphalt

Sam broke her leg in high school jumping from the roof of the old gym because Speedy Hendricks wanted to beat the crap out of her.

Hey, you, Speedy yelled when he saw Sam talking to his girlfriend in the parking lot. You start that rumor about me?

Oh, oh, Sam said and took off running. She knew she couldn't outrun him, so she ran into the gym.

Come back here, you little, Speedy yelled then took off after her. Speedy was right behind her when she slammed the door in his face. He kicked it open just in time to see Sam scamper up the steps to the balcony. He started taking the steps two at a time.

I'm going to beat you when I catch you, girl.

Got to catch me first, boy. Sam jumped up on the ladder that led to the roof just as Speedy reached out to grab her.

Get down from there, he yelled.

Why? Can’t get it up, she yelled back.

Nice panties you’re wearing, he taunted.

That’s all you've ever seen, isn’t it, she said as she pushed open the roof door and slid outside.

Speedy hurried up the ladder and sprang out onto the roof.

I’m going to smash in your ugly head, Speedy yelled as he ran across the roof.

You’re not man enough to catch me, Sam yelled back and, without hesitating, soared off the edge of the building.

Everyone gasped. She was sailing out into space two stories above us. Death, everyone thought, including Speedy. He came to a screeching stop just at the edge of the roof and watched Sam’s slow arc into asphalt, her skirt billowing up around her head so everyone could see her black and orange Bengal tiger striped underwear.

Speedy’s girlfriend told Sam that Speedy’s nickname came because he was the fastest member of the 440 relay. Sam joked that he’d better not be the fastest member in the sack. Speedy’s girlfriend laughed. Kristin ‘Big Boobs’ Quisling laughed along with all the other girls at the lunch table, but someone started repeating it and, like the game where you whisper a sentence around in a group and it comes out all twisted and bizarre, Sam’s joke came out that Sam knew from experience that Speedy was quick in bed. Of course, his girlfriend refused to say either way because that would mean she did It and back then, nice girls didn’t admit to doing It.

After the ambulance had taken Sam to the hospital, Mrs. Johnson turned to the crowd surrounding the spot where Sam had landed. She glared at Speedy and then looked at his girlfriend.

What on this green earth enticed Samantha to jump off that roof, she demanded.

Everyone suddenly looked down as if the answer were scribbled on their shoes. No one wanted to say the real reason because Mrs. Johnson was like everyone’s mother and no one wanted to say anything even vaguely related to sex. But some of the girls started to giggle because they knew what Sam would say if she were there.

I said Speedy had too quick of a trigger in bed. Know what I mean? And then she’d imitate Groucho Marx, winking and stabbing Mrs. Johnson in the ribs with her elbow while she flicked an imaginary cigar. And, because it was Sam speaking, Mrs. Johnson would have to laugh. That’s just the way Sam affected people. Sam was always good at getting into trouble and joking her way out of it.

Usually.

After graduating from high school, her part-time cashier’s job at Kroger’s turned full-time. Sam was popular with the few customers that still shopped there because she remembered their names and, often, their birthdays. Speedy’s girlfriend worked there, too, so the two of them would stand at the check out counter, clean their nails and gossip about who Big Boobs Kristin was seeing while they waited for customers to show up.

While they waited, Speedy’s girlfriend became Speedy’s ex-girlfriend. Speedy got a track scholarship to UW-Mad and he started proving Sam’s rumor was true after all. The rumors of Speedy screwing every woman in Madison got back to his girlfriend and they broke up during the Christmas holidays.

Then Roger Larsen walked into Kroger’s to buy a loose can of Schlitz. He brought it up to Sam’s register and dug a bunch of coins out of his jeans pocket.

Them jeans any tighter and you’d be pulling those coins out of your butt, Sam said nonchalantly.

What, Roger asked, his hand still holding a fistful of quarters and dimes.

Your jeans. You got a naked little brother?

What?

Sam looked over at Speedy’s ex-girlfriend. I think he’s just pretending to be dumb.

Speedy’s ex-girlfriend smiled and checked out Roger’s butt. She liked what she saw and smiled again.

Look, just ring up the beer, okay? Roger complained.

Sam punched the keys on the register, bagged the beer, and handed it back.

Schlitz, huh? Don’t like real beer? she asked.

Hey, I ain’t taking no more of your guff, Roger said then he saw Sam’s sly little smile and stopped. He looked at Speedy’s ex-girlfriend and back at Sam.

Guff? She looked at Speedy’s ex-girlfriend. When was the last time you heard that word? She looked at Roger. Guff? She said it long and slow. Guffy. Guffie, guffie, guffie. Then, You busy tonight, Sam asked with a straight