Family Secrets: Family of Secrets and Lies series, #2

By Valarie Anthony

Family Secrets: The Turbulent Years is Book 2 of the Family of Secrets and Lies series. It is a 40,000-word nonfiction book. Valarie experiences the turbulent teen years as she prepares to go away to college and learns valuable lessons and skills on becoming an independent young woman. During vacations from school, she resides in numerous foster homes and foster group homes while experiencing abuse and neglect within the foster care system.

As a college student she is confronted with many challenges, but she is determined not to allow them to get in the way of her accomplishing her education and career goals. As her twenty-first birthday approaches, she focuses on her housing and career goals in order to prepare for living independently upon "aging out" of the foster care system.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Valarie Anthony
• Release date: May 18, 2023
• ISBN: 9781540187567

Book preview

Dedication

This book is dedicated to all children, youth, and families who have been affected by child abuse and/or neglect, as well as flaws in the foster care system. It is my hope that you gain insight and become empowered with a wide open view of what can really occur inside the system.

Disclaimer

THIS BOOK CONTAINS scenes of physical child abuse, child rape, and ongoing child sexual abuse by adults and may trigger memories of abuse for survivors. This is a work of nonfiction.

I have made every effort to provide a quality reading experience for you, but editing and modern technology are fallible. Please feel free to contact me at [e-mail].

Author’s Notes

ALL NAMES IN THIS BOOK have been changed in order to maintain the dignity and privacy of others. This is Book 2 of the Family of Secrets and Lies series. It depicts language developed from the perspective of a young person, and the tone and vocabulary reflects the age and wisdom of an adolescent.

Family Secrets is based on my youth spent in the foster care system from the ages of 13 to 21. It contains scenes of child rape and ongoing physical and sexual abuse by adults that may trigger memories of abuse for survivors. This is a work of nonfiction.

About This Book

FAMILY SECRETS: The Turbulent Years is Book 2 of the Family of Secrets and Lies series. Valarie experiences the turbulent teen years and later prepares to go away to college where she learns valuable lessons and skills on becoming an independent young woman. During vacations from school, she resides in numerous foster homes and foster group homes while experiencing abuse and neglect within the foster care system.

As a college student, she is confronted with many challenges, but is determined not to allow them to get in the way of her accomplishing her education and career goals. As she envisions a future after foster care and living independently, she begins focusing on her housing and career goals.

CHAPTER ONE

Troubled

I AM ALREADY SAD TO leave my home. I feel very comfortable living in the apartment upstairs from Uncle Mack and his family. When I learn about the type of community that we are moving into, I feel even sadder. There is nothing attractive about the area. On moving day, we arrive at our new home, which is a three-bedroom, one-story house.

There are three bedrooms, a dining room, a living room, an attic, a Spanish-style kitchen, a small bathroom, and a basement. I take notice of the fact that the kitchen is very small and it comes with an old-fashioned refrigerator that doesn’t even make ice or have a water dispenser. It’s just an old ice-box. The small bedroom is Ivy’s room, the medium-sized bedroom is mine, and Aunt Jodie and Uncle Brock have the main bedroom. The house also has a nice-sized backyard, but a very small front yard. I take notice of the fact that there is no fruit trees or vegetable garden like we had at our old house.

The neighborhood isn’t as pretty as the one that we moved from. It is a low-income, depressing area. I have to wonder to myself what would possess my aunt and uncle to decide to move here. What were they thinking? Not only is the community less attractive than the one we came from, but I find that our neighbors are suspicious of us as a family, and they aren’t friendly at all to Ivy or to me.

The house is located right off a main street. Right around the corner from us, I notice that there is a bar and a candy store with plenty of undesirables that often hang out in front of both places at night. I can recall one day while passing the store with Aunt Jodie, I observe two men that are standing in front of the place. One of them only has one arm, and the other is sitting in a wheelchair and only has one leg. I find it very hard to look at the men.

They were in the war, Aunt Jodie says to me in a low voice.

I often wonder how on earth it is that she seems to know so much about people she has never even met. She is referring to the Vietnam War. I recall her telling me that when these men returned home from the war, there was very little appreciation for the fact that they had fought hard for our country. Unable to find work and feeling disrespected, many of these veterans turn to alcohol and/or drugs as a way to cope.

This neighborhood is so lousy to me. I notice that there is no one for me to socialize with and Ivy doesn’t even have playmates like she had in our old neighborhood. The neighbors just seem too aloof and mistrustful of us.

They don’t seem to be as educated or wealthy as many of our old neighbors, and I observe that some of them seem to be angry all the time. Within a few months after moving into our new home, I find out that Eric has run into some issues with drugs and he is now an inpatient at a hospital on Long Island. Feeling depressed over the fact that he can’t find a decent job, he starts hanging out with a new group of friends.

He was smoking marijuana with some friends. It turns out to be PCP, which is Angel Dust. It’s a really bad drug. He kind of went a little crazy after that, Aunt Jodie tells me one day.

What? No way, I respond. 

I really can’t believe what I am hearing. Eric is my hero. I have idolized him for as long as I can remember. I feel hurt and disappointed to learn what has been going on after we moved away. Aunt Jodie feels relieved that we aren't there to witness any of this, but I wonder to myself if this would have happened if we still lived there.

Val, that ain’t the worst of it. He tried to kill his mother. First, he was outside and jumping up and down on top of the roof of his car. So Vella went outside and tried to convince him to come inside the house. She was afraid the neighbors would see what he was doing and start gossiping about the family.

Oh.

Yes. So while he was alone with her inside the house, Eric imagined that there were snakes around her neck. That is when he decided to try and cut the imaginary snakes from around her neck with a butcher knife. He just started chasing her around the house with the knife.

"Oh my God.

I don’t believe this.

As I listen to my aunt telling me about what was going on with my cousin, I can’t help but think of those Afterschool Specials viewed on ABC.

Yeah, so now he's at the hospital. He’s going to have to be on that medication for the rest of his life if he wants to be somewhat normal, Aunt Jodie says as she describes the psychotropic drugs prescribed to my cousin. Vella would like for you to visit him at the hospital, but I don’t think it would be a good idea that you go.

Okay, I tell her, still in shock over what she just told me.

Talk about pressure!

I feel so confused. I want to go down to the hospital to show Eric my support and to let him know that I want him to get better, but the idea of going down to the psychiatric ward of the hospital is pretty scary for me. I don’t know why I feel that way. To my knowledge, I had never, up to this point, visited anyone in a psychiatric ward, but it just seems like a very scary experience.

Also that year, a serial killer strikes New York City. Well, he actually struck the year before, but the media doesn’t fully reveal it until a year later. I remember seeing a front page story in the local newspaper during one of Uncle Brock’s and my newspaper sessions. There was some lunatic killer that was just going around killing young women at random. Aunt Jodie warns me to come straight home from  school because there is a killer on the loose out there.

This nut is out there targeting young girls with long hair. So far, he seems to only be killing white girls, but you just never know. So I want you home right after school.

Okay.

Normally, I would want to argue how unfair it is that I have to come home right after school, but when it comes to this crazy serial killer, she gets no argument from me. I learn later on that he was attacking women and teenagers, and I obey Aunt Jodie. I return home by four o’clock every afternoon until the excitement of the serial killer’s activities dies down.

I also apply that year to an agricultural high school located just a few blocks from the junior high school. Although the school is well known for its agricultural programs, it also has a good math and science program. During the last few months of junior high school, I have to decide on a high school major. I pick Math and Science with the plan of pursuing a career in medicine. The idea of taking typing classes still makes me nauseous, and whenever the subject comes up, I change the topic of conversation.

After getting accepted into the high school and feeling settled over the fact that I have my future all planned, I am now free to enjoy the remainder of the ninth grade. I join my fellow graduates in preparing for the coming commencement exercises, which will take place in June. During the spring, I obtain my working papers and will be applying for my very first job that summer. I apply for a job as a Day Camp Counselor at a Queens-area day camp, where I will be supervising four- and five-year olds. I am already thinking about what I will buy with the money earned. I know that I will have to buy some really nice outfits for school so that I can make a good impression on my classmates.

Back at school, many of my fellow graduates are buying class rings and preparing to go on the senior class trip to a New Jersey-area theme park. I know that I won’t be able to pay for the class trip or for the ring. When I ask Aunt Jodie about it, she tells me that she refuses to spend money on such ridiculous things. Perhaps if I’m lucky, I’ll be able to buy a high school ring and go on the senior class trip as a high school graduate, she tells me.

I learn in later years that the foster care agency provides money for items such as class rings and yearbooks, as well as class trips. I also learn that when Ivy begins preparing to graduate from junior high school a few years later, Aunt Jodie not only purchases her class ring, but she also pays for her senior class trip. Missing out on memorable events such as the class trip, the prom and the excitement of buying the class ring is something that I have become used to. It is a fact of life for many foster kids, as well as many non-foster children. Instead of focusing on what I can't have, I try not to think of those things as I continue the remainder of the school year as I excitedly anticipate