It Gets Better Now!: A Tool Guide for Teens
By LJ Abramczyk
()
About this ebook
It Gets Better NOW! A Tool Guide for Teens is the first spiritual self-help book written especially for young people that introduces them to their inner power and shows them how to use it.
This indispensable guide leads teens to spiritually empowered lives to help them deal with bullying and pain by introducing them to their true inner selves. It challenges teens' pre-conceived notions about power (or the lack thereof) and presents them with an easy three-step process they can use every day, anytime to learn how to change their thoughts and shift from feeling crappy to happy. It contains a chapter on the unique challenges of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, two-spirit, queer and questioning (LGBTTQ) teens; and even a chapter on the complexities of the changing teenage brain.
All young people can use the tools in this guide to help themselves connect to the loving energy of the universe and learn how to F.L.Y. - First Love Yourself!!
LJ Abramczyk
LJ knows from experience what it's like to live with deep pain and need tools to get out of it. Besides being hooked on spiritual solutions to everyday problems, LJ enjoys meeting and helping young people. She has a Master's in Social Work and has counseled and taught young people in Canada, the United States, Europe and Asia. She also taught AIDS education to young people living on the street and self-esteem to youth coming out. She used to volunteer in her LGBTTQ community as a public speaker, political lobbyist and coming out facilitator. She speaks English, French and German and loves to travel and share empowering information wherever she can.
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It Gets Better Now! - LJ Abramczyk
Copyright © 2013 LJ Abramczyk.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Balboa Press books may be ordered through booksellers or by contacting:
Balboa Press
A Division of Hay House
1663 Liberty Drive
Bloomington, IN 47403
www.balboapress.com
1-(877) 407-4847
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.
ISBN: 978-1-4525-7189-8 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-4525-7191-1 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-4525-7190-4 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2013906160
Balboa Press rev. date: 07/08/2013
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Preface
♥ Why I Wrote This Book
♥ How the Book Came into Being
Acknowledgments
Introduction
♥ This Book Is for You
♥ What Is the Book About?
♥ Why Talk About Your Teen Brain?
♥ What Is in the Book?
♥ Special Affection for Young LGBTTQ People
♥ Young People
♥ Why Should You Read This Book?
Chapter 1 Who Are You And Why Are You Here?
♥ Who Are You?
♥ What is Source
?
♥ Why Are You Here?
♥ What Are the Differences Between Body, Spirit, and Soul?
♥ So What?
♥ You Are Here to Give and Receive Love
♥ What Is Unconditional Love?
♥ How Do You See Yourself?
♥ You Are Here to Learn Self-Care
♥ What About Drugs and Alcohol?
♥ You Can Get High
With Source
♥ Having a Clean, Clear Connection to Source
♥ What About Sex?
Chapter 2 The World Of Your Heart
♥ Another World: The World of Your Heart
♥ The World of Your Mind
♥ Which World Are You Living In?
Chapter 3 Three Easy Steps To The World Of Your Heart
♥ You Can Go from One World to Another
♥ Three Easy Steps to the World of Your Heart
♥ An Important Note about the World of Your Mind
Chapter 4 Your Brain
♥ Your Brain Is Changing
♥ Why Do You Need to Know about Your Brain?
♥ What Kind of Changes Are Happening?
♥ What Else Is Going On?
♥ Your Brain Is Amazing!
♥ So What?
♥ How Can I Get Better?
Chapter 5 Your Power
♥ Where Is Your Power?
♥ What Is Your Power?
♥ How Can You Use Your Power?
♥ How Does Your Power Work?
♥ What if the Pain Comes Back?
♥ Does Your Power Stay Forever?
♥ What Is Your Power When Something Bad Happens?
♥ Your Power and Self-Care
Chapter 6 Your Lgbttq Power
♥ Are You Having Feelings toward Someone of the Same Sex?
♥ What is Your Gender Identity?
♥ Are You First Nations?
♥ Are You Keeping Your LGBTTQ Self a Secret?
♥ What Do You Think about Your LGBTTQ Self?
♥ Coming Out
♥ You Have the Power to Love Your LGBTTQ Self
♥ You Are Here to be LGBTTQ
♥ Your LGBTTQ Mission
Chapter 7 Tools To Get To The World Of Your Heart
♥ What Are the Tools?
♥ When Can You Use the Tools?
♥ When Do You Stop Using the Tools?
Chapter 8 Gratitude
♥ What Is Gratitude?
♥ How Does Gratitude Work?
♥ Why Is Gratitude Cool?
♥ What Do You Say?
♥ When Can You Use Gratitude?
♥ What Are You Thankful For?
♥ Letters of Gratitude
♥ Sharing Gratitude with Others
♥ Gratitude and Wi-Fi
Chapter 9 Prayer
♥ What Is Prayer?
♥ Who Can Pray?
♥ How Do Prayers Work?
♥ How Do You Pray? Four Easy Steps
♥ What Are Some Ideas for Prayers?
Chapter 10 Affirmations
♥ What Is an Affirmation?
♥ How Do Affirmations Work?
♥ How Do You Do
Affirmations?
♥ Examples of Affirmations
Chapter 11 Reframing
♥ What Is Reframing?
♥ How Can You Practice Reframing?
♥ Examples of Reframing Mindmuck
Chapter 12 Reaching Out
♥ What Is Reaching Out?
♥ When Do You Reach Out?
♥ An Example of Reaching Out
♥ Why Reach Out?
♥ To Whom Do You Reach Out?
Chapter 13 Morning Routine
♥ Morning Self-Talk
♥ Morning Gratitude
♥ Morning Affirmations
♥ Bedhead and Other Morning Specialties
♥ Morning Prayers
Chapter 14 Bedtime Routine
♥ Your Last Thoughts of the Day
♥ Say Kind Words
♥ Bedtime Gratitude
♥ Bedtime Affirmations
♥ Reframe Your Day
♥ Ask for Help
♥ Bedtime Prayers
Afterword
Endnotes
Bibliography
About The Author
To Josée, the love of my life,
for showing me the way to the
World of My Heart, over and over again.
Je t’aime de tout mon cœur et mon âme.
PREFACE
Why I Wrote This Book
I wrote It Gets Better Now! because I feel very strongly that it is time to teach young people about their connection to the powerful loving Source of energy in the universe, how to find it, and when to use it to step in and take over the voice of fear and self-hatred.
The inspiration for this book and its title came from the heart-breaking deaths of many teenagers because they were bullied or lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, two-spirited, queer or questioning (LGBTTQ). Many teens experience loneliness, abuse, isolation, heartbreak, trauma and other life experiences that leave them feeling hopeless and struggling with self-hatred. For some, the pain is too much and they want to end the pain by ending their lives.
The more I heard about these young deaths, the more I could feel my heart breaking. I felt I had to do something, as I understood their pain. I’ve been to that place where I felt so bad that I wanted to die. As I learned of another suicide and another after that, I wondered why so many young people were taking their own lives. The answer came: "Because it sucks for teenagers now!"
An image showed up in my mind’s eye: I saw a teenage boy looking in a mirror and feeling completely alone, rejected, and hopeless. He asked, Why am I here?
He did not find a good answer. He continued to feel a lot of pain. He was alone with himself and his thoughts. He was alone with his power to decide between life and death, and in that moment, he made the biggest decision of his life: he chose death.
I felt his hopelessness, grief and complete despair. I know about that all-important moment of decision because I’ve been there. I’m a very sensitive person and I feel things very deeply, especially pain. Before I found spiritual tools to connect with Source, I lived every day with pain and fear. I still accomplished a lot, but after some time, I didn’t understand why I kept feeling so much crap. I didn’t know there could be more to life and sometimes the pain got to be a bit too much. Thankfully, I discovered that I have the power to connect with Source and feel deep joy and peace as well. Because I am able to do this on a daily basis, I believe that young people can do it, too.
I also know that hardly anyone ever talks about feeling like dying. I know that more people have that moment than we realize. I know that sometimes we feel totally alone and not connected to anyone or anything that brings love. I know that we sometimes feel totally cut off from any love that could be with us in that moment, and we cannot find a reason for being here.
One of the reasons I wrote this book is because I want young people to know that when they make the decision whether to live or die, they are not alone. There is a source of love with them, and it is ready to help in that moment. I want them to be aware of Source, aware of their inner power, and aware that in that moment of decision, they have many options for getting out of the pain.
More images and ideas came flooding into my mind’s eye after I saw the boy at the mirror, such as the title of this book. One response to the epidemic of gay teen suicides was a global outpouring of love, support, and compassion begun by the phenomenal It Gets Better
project. I felt that it was imperative to channel my love, support and compassion to teach LGBTTQ and all teens that they do not have to wait to get older before they can feel better; they can start having a better life now, using spiritual tools.
I also remembered information about the teenage brain that my spouse brought home from work, and I thought about my own spiritual practices that connect me to Source. Then I knew what I could offer young people at the brink of taking their lives: I could share my spiritual tools to get out of pain, and I could help them understand how their changing brains are helpful and not helpful right now.
This book is for all young people, with special attention to LGBTTQ teens and their particular mission in life. We are all connected spiritually; we are all linked when it comes to something as basic as love and self-care. We are all loving beings, and there is no