Reset Your Buttons

By Mary Elizabeth Murphy

Want better relationships at work and at home? RESET Your Buttons shows you how to achieve more productive relationships for greater success.

When you learn how to RESET Your Buttons, youre really putting to use a skill set that is absolutely necessary for anyone working with other people in a professional environment. Learning how to recognize the way you react to your work culture and learning how to cope with negative stimuli is an absolute must for those of us who want to succeed in business and in life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Sep 1, 2009
• ISBN: 9781449004491

Mary Elizabeth Murphy

Mary Elizabeth Murphy is Managing Director and owner of S.T.A.R. Resources, headquartered in Charlotte, N.C. She has been teaching the skills to earn more, achieve more and produce more since 1993. S.T.A.R. is a powerful acronym for Strategic Teams Achieving Results. Mary Elizabeth uses her vast knowledge, training and experience to build teams, enhance interpersonal relationships and increase effectiveness and productivity in the workplace. Her articles on these topics have appeared in numerous business and professional publications. Mary Elizabeth was awarded the Small Business Administrations North Carolina Women in Business Champion of the Year for her commitment to the advancement of womens business ownership. She was named by the national training and development publication T+D Magazine as one of six recipients of the prestigious Trainings New Guard for her ability to inspire others with her passion, determination and success.

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Rave Reviews for RESET Your Buttons

"RESET Your Buttons carries importance to the business owner and executive looking to get back to basics in today’s economy, speaking to the human nature of the individual. Mary Elizabeth’s writing style is also functional for everyone, regardless of their background in personal and group dynamics. Caveat: Much like Cliff Notes, if you don’t hire S.T.A.R. Resources, you are missing the beauty of the literature!"

Bob Abeel, Regional Manager – Noteworthy

"I was anxious to go out and buy this book after reviewing the first few pages. I immediately wanted to send it to my children who are now in the adult world of relationships, both personal and in the work world and say ‘see, it’s OK not to know how to do everything perfectly; not to know what to expect; not to know exactly how to be ready; it’s really OK NOT TO KNOW!!!’ As Mary Elizabeth points out, we have never experienced the next moments of our lives before----so how can we possibly know how to live them??

Mary Elizabeth reminds us that our reactions to situations at home, at work and other social arenas are all based on our core values and how we respond to challenges to those values. The goal is to be a self-directed person, not an other directed person; the goal is to be someone who sets, or re-sets our own buttons - taking away the power of others to ‘push our buttons.’ We can learn to be a person who says ‘I choose to’ rather than a person who says ‘I have to.’

This book is a ‘how to’ for all of us to learn how to be the kind of person we want to be and know we can be … and have the tools to be. We just have to do some work to get there!"

Jay Polzien, VP of Marketing - Artwear Embroidery, Inc.

I really liked reading RESET Your Buttons... it was as if Mary Elizabeth Murphy was having a personal conversation with me. It was a lot of fun! I jotted down some terrific ideas I picked up while reading it. Great job!

Keith Ayers, President - Integro Leadership Institute

RESET Your Buttons

(and create relationships that work!)

Mary Elizabeth Murphy

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AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2009 Mary Elizabeth Murphy. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 9/15/2009

ISBN: 978-1-4490-0449-1 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4490-0624-2 (sc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2009907574

Printed in the United States of America

Bloomington, Indiana

Contents

Chapter One: Recognition

Chapter Two: Expectations

Chapter Three: Sense of Self

Chapter Four: Emphasize Core Values

Chapter Five: Take Stock

Chapter Six: DISARM

Afterword

This book is dedicated to my parents John Patrick and Elsie Murphy, my husband Gary Erdakos, my brother Michael Patrick Murphy and my sister Kathleen Mary Gulch for all their love, commitment, support and willingness to learn alongside of me while I continue to RESET my buttons.

Acknowledgments

When it came time to write the acknowledgment for this book I began stressing (the-lie-awake-all-night-can’t-eat kind) over it. Racing through my head was this thought, How could I acknowledge everyone without leaving anyone out? Because, God forbid I should forget someone and hurt their feelings - thereby causing their or my buttons to be pushed!

And then it hit me: who put all those wonderful people into my life? Every single soul that has touched my life came into my life thanks to God. So to God I give thanks, for all of you who have touched my life. You each have contributed to M.E. and therefore contributed to the creation of this book.

To God for sending you and to you for being you I give thanks.

Joyfully yours,

Mary Elizabeth

Prologue

One of the worst things we can do to ourselves and our self-esteem is to utter the words, Somehow I should know.

Much of my youth was spent listening to my mother’s sage advice and wisdom. She used to say things like Why do you let them push your buttons? You need more self-esteem.

She would say it so often that it got to the point that I began to wonder if self-esteem was a product I could find in the canned goods aisle at my local grocery; peas, beans, corn, self-esteem, beets, pickles…

If only it were that easy! Over the years I have given a good deal of thought and contemplation to my mother’s advice, and I wondered what letting someone push my buttons has to do with my self-esteem levels. One day while driving down the road and listening to a tape by one of the leading authorities on self-esteem, I heard him say something that really stuck with me. I’ll paraphrase here, but the core and heart of the matter was his contention that one of the worst things we can do to ourselves and our self–esteem is to utter the words, Somehow I should know.

I pulled the car over. It was as though the skies opened up and manna from heaven