The Most Important Things You'll Need to Know Before You Start Living Life on Your Own

By John Gerger

This book, written for and to the author's children, contains the information that he wanted to pass on to them before they started living their lives on their own. He realized that there was plenty he failed to teach them while he was away from home on business. This book is his attempt to put the information that he thought they would need into a form that they could read now and reference again later.

It contains information about the things that they would face for the first time, such as planning and budgeting, bank accounts and writing checks, building and maintaining a good credit report, apartments and leases, and the responsibilities and costs involved in owning an automobile. It contains information that he hoped would help his children minimize the mistakes that they were sure to make. After he wrote it, he realized that ANYONE who was about to start living life on their own could benefit from this information.

This book contains information about the most important things YOU'LL need to know before you start living life on your own.

• Language: English
• Publisher: iUniverse
• Release date: Dec 9, 2002
• ISBN: 9781462082193

John Gerger

John Gerger is a technical and managerial consultant in the computer industry, an industry in which he has worked for more than twenty-three years. He has been living life on his own and in various relationships since 1974.

Book preview

The Most Important Things

You’ll Need To Know Before You

Start Living Life On Your Own

John Gerger

Writers Club Press

New York Lincoln Shanghai

The Most Important Things You’ll Need To Know Before You Start Living Life On Your Own

All Rights Reserved © 2002 by John Gerger

No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or by any information storage retrieval system, without the written permission of the publisher.

Writers Club Press

an imprint of iUniverse

For information address:

iUniverse

2021 Pine Lake Road, Suite 100

Lincoln, NE 68512

www.iuniverse.com

ISBN: 0-595-25847-6 (Pbk)

ISBN: 0-595-65376-6 (Cloth)

ISBN: 978-1-4620-8219-3 (ebook)

CONTENTS

PREFACE

1. Planning

1.1. Pay Your Tithe

1.2. Pay Mandatory Expenses First

1.3. Contribute to Savings

1.4. Obtain Proper Insurance Coverage

1.4.1. Vehicle Insurance

1.4.2. Health Insurance

1.4.3. Renter or Homeowner’s Insurance

1.4.4. Life Insurance

1.5. Budget

1.6. Maintain a Proper Diet

1.7. Economize Wherever Possible

1.8. Resist Impulse Buying

1.9. Resist Debt

1.10.Use Credit Wisely

1.11.Be Successful

2. Your Paychecks

2.1. Your Social Security Number

2.2. W-4 Employee’s Withholding Allowance Certificate

2.3. Gross Pay

2.4. Withholdings

2.5. Net Pay

3. Bank and Savings Association Accounts

3.1. Savings Account

3.2. Checking Account

3.2.1. The Check Payment Cycle

3.2.2. Ordering Your Checks

3.2.3. Having Your Cancelled Checks Returned By The Bank

3.2.4. Writing Checks

3.2.5. Mistakes on Checks

3.3. Maintaining Your Accounts

3.4. Retirement Account

3.5. Other Accounts

3.6. Other Services and Considerations

4. Loans

4.1. Credit Cards

4.2. Installment Loans

5. Place of Residence

5.1. Rental Residence

5.2. Owned Residence

5.3. Concluding Remarks

6. Automobiles

6.1. Driver’s License

6.2. Automobile Insurance

6.2.1. You

6.2.2. Your Vehicle

6.2.3. Where You Live

6.2.4. Where You Keep Your Vehicle

6.2.5. Reducing The Cost Of Insurance

6.2.6. Policy Cancellation

6.2.7. How To Buy Automobile Insurance

6.3. Automobile Purchase

6.3.1. Vehicle Maintenance

6.3.2. Warranties

6.3.3. Vehicle Pricing

6.4. Automobile Care

6.4.1. Interior Cleaning Information and Tips

6.4.2. Exterior Washing Information and Tips

6.4.3. Polishing Information and Tips

6.4.4. Waxing Information and Tips

6.4.5. Finishing Touches

6.5. Concluding Automobile Remarks

7. Budgeting 101

7.1. Creating a Budget

7.2. Living Expenses

7.3. Not-so-obvious Expenses

7.4. Sample Budget Worksheet

8. Addressing Mail

8.1. Official State Abbreviations

8.2. Common Abbreviations

8.3. Size Standards

9. Fatherly Advice and Philosophies of Life

9.1. Freedom and Responsibility

9.2. Winning and Losing

9.3. Borrowing

9.4. Education

9.5. Sign Your Name To Your Work

9.6. Learn How to Communicate Effectively

9.7. Resist Advertisements and Promotions

9.8. The One You Can Count On

10. Summary

ENDNOTES

To Mom, because of you, I learned to manage my finances and to cook,

To care about day-to-day living,

To appreciate my possessions,

And much,much more…

To Dad, because of you, I learned to care for my car and my tools,

To be concerned about my appearance,

To support my family in the best manner possible,

And much,much more…

To Gina, because of you, I learned what it means to be needed,

What joy a bouncing child can bring into a life,

What happiness can be derived from something that is said,

And much,much more…

To JT, because of you, I learned what it means to be responsible,

What it means to be truly excited,

What value there is in respect,

And much,much more…

You have been the most important people in my life

And I love you more than I could ever express.

I am sorry for the disappointments I have caused.

I am forever grateful for everything you have taught me.

I am what I am today because of you.

May God bless you

And may you be with Him always.

PREFACE

April 19, 2001

Dear Gina and JT,

As I think about the near future for you both, I realize that there is probably a huge subject that has either only been touched upon or has not been covered at all in your education. I know that I was not taught this subject in school. When I went out into the world to start living life on my own, I realized that it was a subject that I REALLY needed. It is a subject that will probably be more immediately important to you than all the other subjects that you have studied in school, yet it is the subject that is probably still not taught in school. The subject to which I am referring is Household Finance. Then, as I was thinking about this subject, I realized that there is an even broader subject: Living Life on Your Own.

I do not believe that schools teach you how to exist on a day-to-day basis. Schooling may train you for a career, or at least give you some tools that you will need to build a career, but it does not train you to live your every day lives. I realize now, that was my job—I was supposed to teach you about the topics that are encompassed by this subject.

You may currently think that you already know something or even everything about these topics; however, I want to present these ideas to you anyway, because you will definitely need them in the near future and you just may realize that you don’t know what you thought you knew. If you decide that you do not need this information now, or, if you do read this now, after you have read this, you can set this letter aside in a safe place and use it as a reference guide when and if you need it in the future.

I want to present you with some ideals for living. I may or may not have practiced these ideals myself. In the cases that I have not practiced an ideal, I may be presenting to you what I have learned from the mistakes that I have made. Believe me, I have made plenty of mistakes.

YOU will NEED to make mistakes, also, for making mistakes is one method of learning. However, I believe that I might be able to help you to avoid certain problems by giving you some appropriate information. You also can learn from my mistakes and thus avoid the penalties associated with those mistakes. However, you must realize that you will make your own mistakes; and in doing so, you must realize that you will have to pay the penalties associated with those mistakes. So, if the information in this letter does nothing more than help you to minimize your mistakes and penalties, it will have been worth while.

This document is evolving even as I am typing it. I started out thinking of it as a letter and writing it that way. I have, since I started my writing, created an outline of topics about which I have something to say. (In the writing that I have done in my professional career, I have found that an outline is an invaluable tool for the creation of a document, and, I have made it a rule to use an outline to create any document. This document has proven to be of no exception.) I have generated a good number of topics on which I have information to pass along to you, more than should be conveyed in a letter. And, I am sure that I will think of additional topics as I am writing. So, I have decided to continue to write this document as a guidebook rather than a letter. I do hope you get some value from this guidebook. Here is the outline that I created to guide me in my writing.

Subject Matter Outline

1. Know God

2. Planning

2.1. Pay Your Tithe

2.2. Pay Mandatory Expenses First

2.3. Contribute to Savings

2.4. Obtain Proper Insurance Coverage

2.5. Budget

2.6. Maintain a Proper Diet

2.7. Economize Wherever Possible

2.8. Resist Impulse Buying

2.9. Resist Debt

2.10. Use Credit Wisely

2.11. Be Successful

3. Your Paychecks

3.1. Your Social Security Number

3.2. W-4 Employee’s Withholding Allowance Certificate

3.3. Gross pay

3.4. Withholdings

3.4.1. Federal Tax

3.4.2. FICA

3.4.3. FUTA

3.4.4. State Tax

3.4.5. Health Insurance

3.4.6. Retirement Benefit

3.4.7. Other Deductions

3.5. Net pay

4. Bank Accounts

4.1. Savings Account

4.2. Checking Account

4.2.1. Check Payment Cycle

4.2.2. Ordering Checks

4.2.3. Having Your Cancelled Checks Returned By The Bank

4.2.4. Writing Checks

4.3. Mistakes on Checks

4.4. Maintaining Your Accounts

4.5. Retirement Account

4.6. Other Accounts

4.7. Other Services and Considerations

5. Loans

5.1. Credit Cards

5.2. Installment Loans

6. Place of Residence

6.1. Rental Residence

6.2. Owned Residence

7. Automobiles

7.1. Driver’s License

7.2. Automobile Insurance

7.3. Automobile Purchase

7.4. Automobile Care

8. Budgeting 101

8.1. Creating a Budget

8.2. Living Expenses

8.3. Not-so-obvious Expenses

8.4. Sample Budget Worksheet

9. Addressing Mail

9.1. Official State Abbreviations

9.2. Common Abbreviations

9.3. Standard Sizes

10. Fatherly Advice and Philosophies of Life

10.1. Freedom and Responsibility

10.2. Winning and Losing

10.3. Borrowing

10.4. Education

10.5. Sign Your Name To Your Work

10.6. Learn How to Communicate Effectively

10.7. Resist Advertisements and Promotions

10.8. The One You Can Count On

11. Summary

Since I have decided to turn this letter into a guidebook, I have decided to cover my first outline topic, Know God, in this preface. I felt that the topic was more personal and should be directed specifically to you both.

To know God, in my opinion, will be, without a doubt, the most important aspect of your life. I believe that you must know God and have a close, personal relationship with Him to live a just and righteous life. God is with you always, and He is the ONLY one who will be with you always, in good times, in bad times, in sickness and in health, in death and beyond. He is the one who deserves ALL of your love. He is the one who deserves your greatest respect. He is the one to whom you can turn in your times of joy or thanksgiving, or in your times of crisis or need. The God to Whom I refer is the God of the Judeo/Christian monotheism, the one God, the Almighty, the creator of Heaven and earth.

To know God, you must begin to understand Him as an adolescent and as an adult. Up until now, you have known God through the concepts that you were taught in school and through the discussions that you may have had with various people. The concepts that you learned in school could be described as childish concepts. These childish concepts are not bad, nor are they incorrect. They are ideas that have been presented to a child in a manner that a child could understand. As a child, you have been exposed to very simplistic notions of God and His goodness. It is now your job to question what you have learned.

You will probably use the word why quite a bit, asking questions about why this or that is the case. When you ask these types of questions, you will be challenging your faith and your spiritual feelings may diminish as a result. You may even go through a period during which you do not have any spiritual feelings at all. This is only natural, and, in fact, it MUST happen if you are to understand God in your own way, as an adult. I did it. I have seen others do it. It is supposed to happen. I found a quotation that pertains exactly to this phenomenon.

In adolescence a person rejects many childish religious notions on the basis of his experiences in life. This is a good and necessary part of religious growth. Inadequate concepts have to be uprooted. Clearing away childish religious notions often leaves a religious emptiness for a time, so that many people go through a period when they are non-religious. But eventually mature religious concepts should begin to develop to replace the demolished childish concepts. Thus, the usual process of religious maturing resembles the process of clearing away old, useless buildings, having an empty lot for a short time, then building a new structure.¹

As you question why, you must seek answers. You will probably find information and ideas in many places, especially in conversations, in classes at school, in books, and on the Internet. Some ideas you come across will suggest that God does not exist. Some will proclaim the opposite. As you seek the answers to your questions, you must understand that the existence of God can neither be proven nor disproven scientifically. So, in my opinion, the first thing you must do is to prove to yourself that God does or does not exist. You will come across many ideas in your classes of higher learning—in classes of philosophy, psychology, logic, religion, etc. You will come across many ideas in your discussions with friends, acquaintances, and relatives, or in your arguments with rivals and opponents. You must search for your own proof that God does or does not exist. For, it is only after you can convince yourself that God does exist that you can have a close, personal relationship with God.

If you are successful at convincing yourself that God does exist, to maintain a close, personal relationship with Him, you must know how to communicate with Him. You must know how to pray. Prayers come in several forms. There are formal prayers, the prayers that you memorized in school, and there are informal prayers, the words you speak to God in the recesses of your mind and heart. Whether you use formal or informal prayer to talk with God, you must talk with God often. You can talk to Him no matter where you are or what you are doing. I urge you to talk to God throughout your day and to make time to meditate about God. To meditate is to reflect, to focus your thoughts. Meditation will bring you tranquility. You can use the Lord’s Prayer to meditate about God. To do so, close your eyes and think about the meaning of each word as you say it very slowly in your mind:

Our Father,

Who art in heaven,

Hallowed be Thy name;

Thy kingdom come;

Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread;

And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass

gainst us;

And lead us not into temptation,

But deliver us from evil.

I believe that the most important line in this prayer is the line telling God to forgive us the way we forgive others. If you remember this line and live by it, you will forgive people much more quickly for what they have done to you. After all, we certainly can’t expect God to be easy on overlooking our sins if we hold grudges and find it hard to forgive others. Please, God, forgive us our trespasses JUST as we forgive those who trespass against us.

You must know by now that I was raised in, and continue to believe in, the Roman Catholic Faith, and that your mother was raised in the Protestant Faith. It will behoove you to understand the differences and thereby possibly begin to understand your mother and me just a little better. It is my intention to urge you to investigate the true and original Christian Church, the Roman Catholic Church, for all Protestant denominations were spawned from this lineage. It is not my intention to explain the differences; plenty of books have been written on this subject. I do urge you to learn the differences.

It is not my intention to tell you what to believe—what you believe is up to you. It is, however, my intention to urge you to live a Christian lifestyle. In living a Christian lifestyle, you must know Jesus. In living a Christian lifestyle, you must know the Holy Spirit. This is not an option! And, if you do live a Christian lifestyle, you have a responsibility:

Those who with God’s help have welcomed Christ’s call and freely responded to it are urged on by love of Christ to proclaim the Good News everywhere in the world. This treasure, received from the apostles, has been faithfully guarded by their successors. All Christ’s faithful are called to hand it on from generation to generation, by professing the faith, by living it in fraternal sharing, and by celebrating it in liturgy and prayer.²

It is your responsibility to pass on what you have learned to others, whether those others are your children, your friends and acquaintances, your pupils, or anyone depending upon you for guidance. The Faith has been passed down over twenty centuries in this manner. In order to pass on your faith, you must learn your faith well. It does you no good just to know about a faith, just to know that it exists. As an illustration, personal computers can be of no use to you if you if you just know they exist. You have to learn about their capabilities, practice on them, and use them if they are going to be of direct, personal benefit to you. The same is true of a faith. You have to learn your faith, practice your faith, and use your faith if it is going to be of any benefit to you whatsoever. It does you no good to keep your faith hidden within you.

In learning your faith, you should know enough about your faith to be able to defend it. One day, you may be asked why you believe what you do. It is very frustrating, when asked why you believe something, to realize that you used to know why you believe something, but, that, over the years, you have forgotten. Learning about and reviewing your faith is an ongoing process, a process that you should continue throughout your life. When I finished my college education, I figured that I had learned everything that I was going to need to know about my faith. I learned the hard way some years later, when I was asked why I believed something and I couldn’t provide a satisfactory answer, that learning and reviewing my faith should be an ongoing process. As a result, I still actively try to understand my faith better. You should know enough about your faith to teach it, so it can be handed down to your children and to anyone else that desires to know more about it. Never be afraid to explain your faith, and never be ashamed of your faith.

Know the difference between good and evil. There are two important sets of guidelines that have been given to us by God Himself that define what is good and what is