Outfox the Kids for Fun and Profit: Pearls of Wisdom from the Klamm

By R.W. Klamm

It's fun to watch your children grow into responsible, productive adults; and can profit you much joy to know you have had an important part in the doing. Outfox the Kids for Fun and Profit by R. W. (Bob) Klamm can help you increase both the fun and the profit.

Mr. Klamm, a master high school teacher for 20 years, and an award-winning author, has mentored children of all ages for over fifty years. He and his wife, Berniece, have guided their two sons through the hippie hazards of the sixties, the unrest of the seventies, and into the uncertainties of the eighties to establish stable, loving family relationships of their own.

In Outfox the Kids for Fun and Profit, he shares his experiences in these entertaining, sometimes humorous true stories, fables, fractured fairy tales, and parables. All are little gems of wisdom pearls from the Klamm to help you with your little gems of joy.

What a wonderful treasure to share with a spouse, or those new young parents down the street!

• Language: English
• Publisher: iUniverse
• Release date: Jun 7, 2007
• ISBN: 9780595877652

R.W. Klamm

R. W. Klamm was born in Kansas City, Kansas, didn?t know he was nearly blind until he was eight years old. Graduated Northwestern University; University Missouri KC; Twenty-year master high school teacher; seventeen-year mentor-founder, youth magic club. Award-winning author. Comedy performer of magic for nearly seventy years.

Book preview

Copyright © 2007 by Klamm Magic LLC

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording,taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

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The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibilityfor them.

Illustrations by Athena Stringfellow

ISBN: 978-0-595-43438-1 (pbk)

ISBN: 978-0-595-87765-2 (ebk)

My thanks to a wonderful family extended, spanning more than a century.

A special thanks to my wife Berniece. Without her input and careful attention to detail, this book would not have been possible.

Contents

INTRODUCTION

LITTLE PEARL 1 WHOSE LIFE IS IT, ANYWAY?

LITTLE PEARL 2 THE BLAME GAME

LITTLE PEARL 3 WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET

LITTLE PEARL 4 LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON

LITTLE PEARL 5 TEAGAN AND THE BIG SOX

LITTLE PEARL 6 A CONTINUING TALE OF TEGAN

LITTLE PEARL 7 TEAGANAND THE TRICYCLE

LITTLE PEARL 8 TEAGAN’S FRIENDS

LITTLE PEARL 9 LITTLE FAILURES, BIG SUCCESSES

LITTLE PEARL 10 ON SPANKING

LITTLE PEARL 11 SPILLED MILK

LITTLE PEARL 12 THE WISDOM OF CHILDREN

LITTLE PEARL 13 CHOICES

LITTLE PEARL 14 JOE’S STORY

LITTLE PEARL 15 TAG! WHO’S IT?

LITTLE PEARL 16 THE THREE BAIRDS

LITTLE PEARL 17 THE AMERICAN WAY

LITTLE PEARL 18 GROWING UP WITH BILLY

LITTLE PEARL 19 CINDERELLA AND THE CASTLE BALL

LITTLE PEARL 20 DOLLARS, DESIRES, AND BROKEN DREAMS

LITTLE PEARL 21 MORE ABOUT MONEY

LITTLE PEARL 22 WHO SAYS I’M EQUAL?

LITTLE PEARL 23 WHAT YOUR KIDS WANT TO KNOW ABOUT SEX, BUT YOU ARE AFRAID TO TELL THEM.

LITTLE PEARL 24 JELLYBEANS!

LITTLE PEARL 25 A TASTY FAMILY FEAST!

LITTLE PEARL 26 WHAT DOES GOD LOOK LIKE?

LITTLE PEARL 27 BUDDIES AND FRIENDS

LITTLE PEARL 28 TEAGAN AND THE FEARSOME FOURS

LITTLE PEARL 29 SELF RELIANCE

LITTLE PEARL 30 LIFE MUST GO ON

LITTLE PEARL 31 GOD’S FLOWER GARDEN

LITTLE PEARL 32 ANOTHER MAN’S ROAD

AFTERWORD

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

FURTHER READING

INTRODUCTION

There is a story, oft’ told, illustrating the wisdom of the great and ancient King Solomon.

He was holding court one day when two women, both harlots, both having recently given birth, approached him. Their intent was for him to judge who was the proper mother of an infant, which they carried between them. In her sleep, one woman had accidentally smothered her own infant. Then she had stolen the other child.

In order to decide who was the real mother, the king called for his sword.

I shall divide the child in two, said the king. Each of you shall share equally.

At these words, one of the mothers smiled in smug agreement. The other shrieked in horror, and cried out, Oh, please, do not kill the child. Give him to the other, if you must, but spare the child.

Hearing this, there was no doubt in the mind of the king. He gently tendered the child to the mother who had cried out.

It is easy to see why the real mother would be willing to give up the child to save his life. It is difficult to understand the motivation of the other. Did she have some desperate need to win, to be right, to ease her anger, or guilt for having accidentally caused the death of her own child? Was it important for her to please the king by agreeing with him? Whatever the reason, her concern was all for herself, and none for the child.

It seems inconceivable that any reason could supersede the life and welfare of a defenseless child, yet it happens every day. Fierce need to survive in poor circumstances; the desire to be right in a messy divorce, custody battle or bitter argument; the urge to win in business or at little league; anger and guilt, whether at self, spouse or outsiders; a desperate need to be loved, or to be in control; the list could go on and on. These concerns are all about the desires of the parents. They have nothing to do with the needs of children. Yet, they all take their disastrous toll on the safety, security, healthy mental growth, and even the very life of today’s youngsters.

If we could but keep our own concerns out of it and concentrate on a few basic principles, parenting would be so much easier. Some of these principles are listed below.

1.   Good parenting is all about helping the child. It has nothing to do with the parent’s wants and needs. No matter how cute, cuddly, distressing, or obnoxious, it is not the child’s job to please the parent. It is the parent’s job to nurture the child.

2.   A good parent is not a friend. He is a firm, consistent source of support that is always dependable. Despite what children may tell us; no matter how much they may protest against it; no matter whether tyke or teen, children want, need, and expect us to provide consistent limits and firm direction.

3.   Children are far more capable than we give them credit for being. They need to be encouraged to do for themselves as much as possible. A good parent is one who becomes less and less needed with each passing day.

4.   Children will pretty much live up to what you expect of them, but respond poorly if you make unreasonable demands. Expect, even require the best, but do not be demanding and overbearing about it.

5.   Children are great imitators. If you see something in them that you do not like, look unto thyself. If you see something that you do like, enjoy the compliment.

6.   Children are human. Regardless of age or abilities, their