11 Things to do before I turn 19

By Barbra Dawson

It's the summer of the 1960s and 17 year old Claire is stuck with the only prospect of becoming another version of her mother. The perfect stepford wife. Her future is planned out ahead of her. Her choice isn't valid and she has no say.

That's until she meets the new boy in town. The local rogue, who already has a reputation for himself. Someone who Claire should stay away from.

As their relationship builds, Claire finds herself building courage to become the woman she wants to be.

Can she push past the boundaries and can they have their happily ever after?

A perfect summer romance novel of young love, second chances and love triangles. The story of Jack and Claire will leave you falling in love all over again.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Barbra Dawson
• Release date: Jul 13, 2018
• ISBN: 9780463193501

Book preview

Chapter 1

The sun was set high in the sky, despite the time of the evening. The promise of a heatwave setting in, bringing relief to the rainy summer which had ceased just a few days before. Voices of local children playing echoed across the local park as they undoubtedly enjoyed the last few precious hours of daylight the overhead sun had to offer. Jenny and Claire were stretched out on a secluded piece of grass, away from all the energetic crowds, the shade of a nearby tree casting over them. The grass was sparse and prickly, itching the back of their exposed legs as they soaked up the heat from the sun.

‘Come on Claire, promise you’ll come. You promised last time and besides, you’re so much more fun than Margaret.’ Jenny begged as she lay next to Claire, her legs outstretched in front of her, trying to reach the one bit of sun which wasn’t in the shade.

‘Oh, I don’t know. My parents really wouldn’t allow me if I asked.’ Claire replied honestly. She did want to go to the local dance at the village hall. She’d wanted to go for months now, ever since it had started at the beginning of Spring. Her authoritative parents knew it took place every first Friday of the month and were positively set against her going. Set against her doing anything normal for her age in fact. 'A girl of mine is not going to some dance where God knows what is happening and with God knows who.’ Her father yelled, the last time she had politely asked.

‘Well just tell him we’re going to the cinema.’ Jenny suggested, shrugging her shoulders. She had never really grasped Claire’s reluctance to stand up to her parents or understood what her parents were like. Jenny’s dad worked away, and her mum was so down to earth she never questioned where she was going or who she was going with. Jenny was always free to do what she wanted and whenever she wanted. One thing Claire had always envied her for.

‘I tried that last time, remember, and he wanted to know the finishing times so that he could wait for me. That’s the reason I cancelled at the last minute.’ She explained. ‘I’d have three hours maximum before he starts searching the village for me and then an extra fifteen minutes before he calls the police.’

Jenny turned over onto her stomach, chin cupped in her hands and remained silent. Claire was positive she could hear her thinking. The way she stared into space at nothing in particular was typically the most significant clue. Claire pushed herself up, so she was leaning back on her elbows and smiled as she observed the carefree children enjoying the freedom of the park. The sight of an elderly couple walking by, hand in hand and still obviously so in love made Claire smile to herself. Jenny pushed herself up onto her knees, her face lit up with excitement.

‘My mum’s fine with us going, so I’ll fill her in on what’s happening. Tell your dad we’re off to the cinema to see that new film that’s out and to save him waiting up, tell him you’ll sleepover at mine. You are seventeen now, you should be allowed out past nine anyway. Give him my house number and if he calls to check, my mum will cover.’ Jenny explained. She seemed so confident with her plan and Claire secretly admitted that it sounded great.

She just wasn’t too convinced on the idea of dragging Jenny’s mum into it. On top of that if she did get caught, you could bet she wouldn’t be allowed out the house again. Lying flat back on the grass, she watched the clouds float past. Moments of when she and Jenny were younger flashed through her memory. They used to lie for hours trying to spot different shapes until Jenny got fed up and demanded they go on some big adventure. She never was one for enjoying a peaceful, uncomplicated life.

‘Alright, I’m in!’ she finally replied, ‘but you must do it exactly as you said.’

She had wanted to go to one of the dances for so long. If all went to plan them, she wouldn’t just be hearing about them through the grapevine.

‘Yes!’ Jenny screamed at the top of her voice. So loud that two birds in a neighboring tree took flight in horror and an old man walking his dog cast them a scornful look as he hurried on past. ‘Right so we’ve got two days to get this planned. Don’t worry about clothes, you can borrow some of mine, and we can do our make-up at mine. I am so excited!’

Claire merely smiled to herself. Consequently, so was she, but she wouldn’t reveal it until she knew full well that everything was going to plan.

Before long they headed out of the park and walked home, Jenny couldn’t stop talking about the dance. She spoke of what songs they’d dance to, what the band looked like, who else would be there and what they’d be wearing. Claire stayed silent, keeping the excitement at bay and taking it all in. Getting her hopes up was something she had always become accustomed to avoiding.

‘You might meet a man.' Jenny winked as they reached Claire’s house.

Claire blushed; it would certainly be considerably better than the man her parents desired her to marry. Walking up the pathway to her childhood home, Claire tried to restrict the small amount of excitement which was beginning to bubble inside of her. The pristine garden which her mother worked tirelessly on was alive with a sea of colors, boarding the neatly cut grass. Claire wasn’t a green-fingered person, but deep down she enjoyed the sight of the variety of colors which jumped out against the plain brick walls and paving. Pushing open the red front door, which had changed color throughout the years more times than Claire could count, she headed inside.

Later that evening, Claire found herself in the kitchen, helping her mother dry the dishes. Hearing her father shout for a drink she felt her heart quicken, she knew this was the ideal opportunity to ask her father about their plans for Friday. She had practiced what was to be said all evening and scrutinized it so many times with Jenny on the walk back from the park. A variety of versions ran through her head, with each scenario planned out of his potential replies and how she would respond. She would not let herself down, she thought as she poured his familiar glass of whiskey and headed into the living room. Seeing he was already settled in his chair, with that day’s newspaper spread out in front of him, a cigar resting in the ashtray balanced on the arm of the chair, Claire walked closer towards him. A sense of awkwardness came over her, as she stood waiting to be acknowledged by him. She was certain he knew she was there so inched forward towards him again, the heels of her shoes clicking against the plain wood floor.

‘Here’s your drink, father.’ she said, placing it down on the table.

He grunted a ‘Thank you’ at her and continued to read.

‘Erm… Father, I have a question to ask you.’ she said quietly, nervously twisting her hands round each other. He mumbled at her, but she didn’t quite hear it. He was still reading the paper, so she hesitated for a few minutes, giving him time to finish reading.

‘Well come on girl, what is it? I haven’t got all night!’ He suddenly demanded making Claire jump slightly.

Now that she had captured his attention, a wave of nerves hit her. She was getting prepared to excuse herself and forget the whole plan but the thought of Jenny and how she would react if she didn’t go through with it, pushed her forward. Jenny already thought she was a pushover with her parents.

‘Well, the thing is father. Jenny has asked me to the cinema this Friday.’ she informed him, feeling half relieved she hadn’t backed out.

‘Okay, I don’t see what the problem is. Just let me know the finishing time, and I’ll wait for you. You’ll need to use your own money, now you’re earning, there’s no need for me to finance you.’

Claire plucked up the courage and continued.

‘Well, there’s another bit that I need to ask. Jenny has asked if I can stay over that night. Well, she suggested it and has already asked her mother. She said that it would save you waiting for me, especially with it being a late showing and you have to work early the next day.’ Claire mumbled on, feeling she was talking much more than needed. She stopped and waited, twisting her fingers round each other as she waited for his reply.

‘I see.’ Was all he uttered. Claire went to carry on, but he held up a hand to stop her. ‘I will talk to your mother about it and will let you know.’

Claire considered this as her cue to leave, she knew it made no difference how her mother responded. Her father always had the final word; all she could do was wait. Saying goodnight to her mother, knowing full well, it was far too early for bed, she made her way up the stairs. Taking out her favorite book – Pride and Prejudice, she settled down onto her bed and began to lose herself in the characters. She undoubtedly could do with a Mr. Darcy in her life right now and equally she admired Elizabeth Bennett for the courage she had, to stand up to anyone who got in her way. It wasn’t long before her thoughts were interrupted with the voices of her parent's talking downstairs. Placing her book down and climbing down off the bed, she inched her way over to her bedroom door, opening it enough so the hinges wouldn’t squeak, and she was able to overhear the conversation.

‘But she is seventeen, dear.’ She heard her mother say, trying but failing to stand up to the man she married. Followed by her father standing his ground, concocting every excuse up he could think of. Claire gave up listening, she knew what the outcome would be and wasn’t looking forward to breaking the news to Jenny tomorrow. Shutting her door, she turned her light off and climbed into bed.

Chapter 2

The sound of her father’s alarm, echoing through the walls of the house, woke her first, and she was surprised when she looked over at her clock. It felt like she had been sleeping all of five minutes, not close to the ten hours it in fact was. Claire waited and listened to make sure her father had finished in the bathroom and was already in the kitchen having breakfast, before venturing out of bed. Pulling her covers back she climbed out of bed. Her father would be leaving for work as soon as he’d eaten, therefore, she was hoping to get out of hearing his refusal. Fortunately, tonight was Girl Guides, which was the perfect excuse to get out of his way and distract herself, as soon as she’d heard him out.

Opening her wardrobe, she pulled out her work clothes; a tweed pencil skirt and pale shirt and dressed slowly, ensuring to waste as much time as possible. Next, she smoothed down the bed spread of her single bed, ensuring it had the ‘military’ corners her mother liked so much. Eventually she heard her father call out his goodbyes to her mother and with the sound of the front door shutting behind him, it indicated the perfect moment to head downstairs.

Claire found her mother at the table finishing her breakfast; toast and a boiled egg, the same breakfast she’d had for the last seventeen years, apart from on Sunday’s where she added a slice of bacon for a treat. Sitting down with her, she reached for the pot of tea and grabbed some of the now cold toast from the rack, they both ate in silence.

‘You’ll have to get a move on soon, else you’ll be late.’ Her mother spoke up, breaking the silence.

‘Oh, I’m alright for another thirty minutes, Mr. Harris has asked us all to go in a bit later, it’s quite nice of him being so flexible.’ Claire replied.

‘Yes, you’ve found yourself a good spot there with Mr. Harris. Of course, it’s perfect for now until you meet somebody who can take care of you.’ Her mother continued, as she began to clear up her now empty plate and the remaining breakfast dishes which had been used that morning.

Claire decided to switch off at this point, instead, observing the birds on the bird table outside which she found far more interesting. If only she was allowed to spread her wings so freely, she thought. By contrast, her life was already planned out for her. Her mum continued her talk in the background of how Claire needed to find a decent husband, unaware of Claire’s lack of interest. Finishing off her breakfast, she stood up taking her dishes to the sink and handing them to her mother.

‘Well, I must get going.' Claire said heading towards the hall, 'Remember I’ve got guides tonight so I will only be back for a quick supper.’

‘Oh yes, it’s Thursday, isn’t it? Fair enough, I’ll see you later.’ her mother replied with a sigh, feeling like Claire hadn’t listened to a word she’d said.

Gathering her bag from the rack in the hall, her mother called her from the kitchen.

‘Oh Claire, I almost forgot to say, your father said you are free to go ahead with your plans with Jenny.’

Claire stood still in shock, this was the last thing she had ever expected, especially with it coming from her mother. Her mother was rarely allowed to pass messages down unless it was something minor like what time she had to be home.

Claire nodded, she slung her bag over her shoulder and simply replied, ‘Thank you, I’ll let Jenny and her mother know.’ Trying to hide the big bubble of excitement inside of her. With a spring in her step, she practically skipped the mile to work that morning. A huge grin was still spread across her face as she entered the office, nothing could bring her down today and she just couldn’t wait to tell Jenny later.

‘I trust your mother has informed you?’ Her father asked Claire sternly, puffing out a cloud of cigar smoke. She was just on the way out of the door for Girl Guides after spending an evening avoiding him in her bedroom.

‘Yes father, she did and I’m very grateful.’ she replied, once more trying to contain the excitement and not to cough on the cloud of smoke that was promptly spreading her way.

‘I would like you to get Jenny’s telephone number for me, of course; it will be handy to have if we ever need to get in touch with you.’

‘Of course, father, I will write it down for you later.’ She turned to leave the room and he merely grunted before stubbing out his cigar and picking up that day's paper.

Walking into Girl Guides that evening, Claire’s face instantly gave way and Jenny knew why before any verbal confirmation. Claire had wanted to keep it a secret for a little bit, playing the disappointed trick, but she couldn’t keep the smile off her face. Jenny ran over to her jumping and screaming with joy, before getting told to calm down by the guide leader.

‘I just knew it would work.' Jenny said ecstatically. ’There’s nothing he could refuse about it. We are going to have so much fun!’

They spent the rest of the evening sneaking in little chats about the dance. Claire doubted she’d get much sleep that night with all the thoughts and excitement running through her head. She was also a little worried that word might get back to her father. He was a well-known man in the village, working his way up in the police service and without a doubt, there would be a lot of people there who would know her.

‘I wouldn’t worry about any of that.’ Jenny reassured her. ‘Besides, it’s not going to seem odd for a young girl at a local dance. They won’t think twice about your being there.’

Claire supposed she was correct and carried on thinking positive, forcing the negative thoughts to the back of her mind. This may be her only chance to enjoy herself, especially if the word did get back to her father, so she would make sure to take full advantage of it

Chapter 3

Trying not to display too much eagerness to get going as Claire reached her house after returning from work that day, she headed towards the kitchen, where she knew her, mother would be. Slinging her coat and bag over the kitchen chair, she caught a glimpse of her mother's disapproving look, knowing full well that she should have hung them both up correctly in the hallway when she entered the house.

‘Nice day?’ her mother quizzed, holding up the tea pot, ‘I’ve just boiled a pot.’

‘Yes, thank you.’ Claire replied, Grabbing a spare cup out of a cupboard. ‘How’s your day being?’

‘Oh, you know, the same as usual.’

Claire felt a hint of sadness from her, as she recalled her monotonous day.

‘Although you wouldn’t believe what Mrs. Baker said to me today.’ her mother carried on.

That was the point Claire decided to switch off, closing the sound of her mother’s mind dumbing gossip amongst the local village and instead drifting off with thoughts of what would be happening tonight. She was already counting down the time for when Jenny left work and she could make her way over to her house to get ready. Forty-Four minutes and counting. She wondered what outfit Jenny had planned for her, and equally what her hair and make-up would look like, once she was all finished.

The last make-up Claire was allowed to wear was at their cousin's wedding the year previously. She was given it by her mother, some rouge lipstick and a bit of blush for her cheeks. Unfortunately, with Claire lacking in

that department, she had tried in vain to get it to look as glamorous as the girls in the magazines, but just couldn’t get it right. therefore, leaving her face plain and boring. As per usual.

Her thoughts broke as she realized her mother was staring at her, as if expecting a reply. Claire looked back quizzically.

’I said, what’s the film you’ll be seeing tonight? Honestly Claire, sometimes I think you don’t hear a word I say.’

Claire watched as her mother stood up and headed over to start chopping the vegetables for tea. Claire didn’t dare confess the truth, but instead reeled off the film description she and Jenny had found from the local cinema guide. They had both been prepared for this question, so the lie had come amazingly easy. By the time she had reeled the lie off, she found her mother had already become preoccupied with the making of tea to care anymore.

Excusing herself to her bedroom, she began to pack the smallest bag she could find. Fortunately, she merely needed toiletries and spare underwear, especially as she’d be borrowing Jenny’s clothes. She could wear the clothes she had on today for tomorrow. Grabbing her diary from her desk, she lay on her bed and began to write.

I literally cannot wait for tonight. I feel awful for lying to Mother and Father, but what else am I supposed to do? There is no way they would let me if I told them the truth, and I already feel like I don’t live the normal life of a girl my age. I wonder who else will be going? I’ve avoided all talk about it the last couple of days, in fear that I might give myself away and ruin the whole night.

Half an hour before her father was scheduled to return from work, she left the house with a quick goodbye to her mother. Making sure to take the long way to Jenny’s house, avoiding the pub her father would be drinking in. It added an additional ten minutes to the walk, but she didn’t want to risk bumping into him and the chance of him randomly changing his mind. With her father, his decisions were all based on what kind of day it was, and they often changed quicker than the weather itself.

The sun beat down on her skin as she walked along which added to the happiness that was bubbling away inside.

Reaching Jenny’s small, terraced house, Claire made her way up the short path and knocked on the door. The excitement was turning to nerves now she had finally got this far, and she felt herself nervously looking around. Almost as if she was expecting her father to have figured out her plan and be marching down the street to drag her back to her bedroom.

‘Come in!’ She heard a call from behind the door.

Pushing open the door, she stepped inside. Claire always marveled at the difference between her house and Jenny’s. Despite the small size in comparison to hers, Claire would swap in a second if she had the chance. The relaxed atmosphere was evident the minute you stepped through the door. The vacuum was still plugged into the mains, wires trailing across the hallway, either waiting to be used, or being refused to be put away. Jenny’s coat, amongst others, was slung over the banister of the stairs, along with shoes strewn in odd pairs along the footwell. Some would say that the house was an accident waiting to happen, but Claire knew that wasn’t the case. There were no formal family dinners here, instead just a small table in the kitchen, which was rarely used for meals. Meals were eaten in a ‘sit where you want’ fashion, whether this be in front of the TV or in your bedroom. Claire made her way past the living room, towards the end of the house to the kitchen where Claire encountered Jenny’s mum sitting at the table; hair in curlers, smoking a cigarette and flicking through a glamorous magazine.

‘Alright Claire love? Looking forward to the cinema?’ She said tapping the side of her nose and winking. Claire wasn’t used to such relaxed, casual parenting, another difference between her household and Jenny’s.

‘Yes thanks.’ Claire replied. ‘Is Jenny upstairs?’

‘She certainly is, she’s got big plans for you tonight. Head on up love.’

Clambering over the clutter on the stairs, Claire made her way up towards Jenny’s room. There were only two bedrooms upstairs, with one small bathroom, so it was easy enough to find which room Jenny’s was. Pushing open her door, she had always felt an instant sense of jealousy over her friend's room. It was so much more grown up than hers. Jenny already had a double bed, a dressing table full of make-up and a wardrobe full of all the most recent fashions. There were even posters plastered across the walls of the popular bands in the charts. Unlike Claire’s room, which still occupied the same single bed she’d had from since she was a child and the same old wardrobe and drawer set that were only filled with what her mother would call ‘Sensible Clothes’. There was no acceptance of posters on the wall either, her parents would certainly not entertain anything like that.

‘You’re here!’ Jenny announced in a high-pitched squeal. ‘I have been so excited all day.’

Placing her bag down on the floor of Jenny’s room, Claire smiled at her, picking up the magazine Jenny had just dropped on the bed.

‘I can’t believe we’re doing this. I have such a mixture of