Uber Diva

By Charles St. Anthony

She's sitting on a secret. Increase your income as the Uber Diva teaches drivers tricks of the trade to become a 5 Star driver. She also instructs passengers on how to avoid getting spanked with a 1 Star rating. Meet the freaks, learn the equipment, and see how this diva survived when a drunk driver T-Boned her car. Based on true rideshare experiences in the San Francisco Bay Area. The book includes educational chapters answering these burning questions:

What kind of insurance is needed as an Uber driver?

What equipment will be necessary before drivers start driving?

How is Uber different than driving for Lyft?

What's the etiquette for passengers?

What about driver and passenger safety?

This book is the author's personal opinion, and does not necessarily reflect the views of the companies mentioned in the book including Uber, Lyft, Google, Apple or Twitter. This book is not affiliated with online jewelry retailer Uber Diva.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Charles St. Anthony
• Release date: Sep 19, 2017
• ISBN: 9780998318554

Charles St. Anthony

Charles St. Anthony hosts the hilarious podcast "T with Charles" where he discuss the scalding hot topics in current events and entertainment. He has published several humorous memoirs and short reads. He graduated from Columbia University with a degree in East Asian Studies. After spending 12 years in Japan where he acquired his master's degree, he returned to the US where he released "Impossibly Glamorous" - his book about gay life in Japan and the American celebrities he met overseas. He followed this up with "San Francisco Daddy," which took a close up look at LGBTQ dating life in the Bay Area. "Uber Diva" and "DTLA Hustler" are humorous short reads on the gig economy where Charles shows the realities of working as a rideshare driver and Postmates courier, respectively. He continues his work as a wit and humorist maintains the handle @kingcharles0921 on Instagram and Twitter.

Book preview

Table of Contents

Uber Diva

Crashing to a Halt

About That Coin

Pre-Game Necessities

Highway to the Danger Zone

The Petty Olympics

One in the Pink

By the Numbers

Sideshow Freaks

Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

Glitch Nation

Rode Hard and Put Away Wet

Random Ass Things I Laughed About to Keep Myself Entertained While Driving

My Acknowledgements

About the Author

Uber Diva

Hot Tips for Drivers and Passengers of Uber and Lyft

Charles St. Anthony

Copyright 2017

Published by Impossibly Glamorous Studios

ISBN: 978-0-9983185-5-4

First Edition

Edited by Marcella Hammer

Cover Illustration of Simone designed by Charles St. Anthony and illustrated by Toonimals. Interior illustrations also by Toonimals.

Disclaimers:

Names, details and locations have been changed to protect the anonymity of people in these pages. This memoir involves actual people I have met and experiences I have lived through. As a work of creative nonfiction, in some cases, accounts have been paraphrased or embellished for purposes of parody or comic effect. However, I have done my best to maintain accuracy in the numbers and figures in the infographic.

The views, information, or opinions expressed the opinion of the author who worked as a private contractor for Uber and Lyft. The observations stated herein are solely the author’s personal opinions and do not necessarily represent those of Uber, Lyft, Apple, Google or Twitter.

This work is protected under the copyright Fair Use Act for de minimis use of copyright protected material for review, commentary, education, criticism and parody.

The author assumes no responsibility or liability for any errors or omissions in the content of this work. The information contained is provided on an as is basis with no guarantees of completeness, accuracy, usefulness or timeliness.

Cover illustration of Simone (the diva) is purely an image from Charles St. Anthony’s imagination and not based on any other person—living or deceased.

Crashing to a Halt

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2:00 a.m. on a Thursday morning, I pull up to a house. Lights flicker on the second floor, and I assume some college students are partying upstairs. Just a few more rides, and I’ll hit my target. By driving a total of twenty-five rides, Uber will give me a $70 bonus. I turn my hazard lights on and fiddle with my mobile phone.

Trust me. This diva never thought life would turn out this way.

A contract I had at a major tech company ended sooner than I had anticipated leaving me in a bind. I had begrudgingly moved from my spunky San Francisco neighborhood to the suburban doldrums of Silicon Valley to be closer to their headquarters. It was only a contract job, and after a mere ten months, they disposed of me like a used up paper plate at a pot luck dinner. I ruminate on this misfortune while waiting for my passenger to join me.

I feel intense pain and am disoriented. I’m going to die. I’m going to die. I don’t know what’s happening, but I struggle to open my car door. I can’t breathe. My whole body reverberates with a metallic vibration. I try to walk